Up yours motherfucker, I was not wrong at all and it takes a motherfucking microsoft fix to fix. The only thing you fuckers was right about was that I should have just googled first, which I freely admit was a mistake since it would have saved me the time from hearing from your pedantic doucheasses. It shows all 4 gb in my bios too.
I bought my new Inspiron 530 with Vista Ultimate, got Dell support to send the x64 bit DVD, installed with no problems, and the system still only sees 3.25 GB of memory in the OS.
The BIOS reports 4GB.
I also just updated the BIOS to the latest on the support site (1.0.10).
Apparently the BIOS must support "memory remapping" for even a 64 bit OS to see all of the memory.