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Apr 12, 2009
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aka pimpdaddyfranky, aka frankydelaghetto, aka F, aka ef

is a Team Rater Alumnusis a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnus
    1. Bloo

      "Playboy is an American men's magazine that features photographs of nude women as well as journalism and fiction."

      What is this fallacious description? I phoned in Merriam Webster and he agreed that this description is a PHONY. Let me modify it slightly: "Playboy is an American magazine solely made to satisfy franky's needs (it's not like he has many anyway you damn baboons, he's fully capable of sustaining himself). The finest woman from the tropical islands and even mermaids from under the sea arise from the deepest depths of the oceans to send in their photographs to this stud muffin in an attempt to gain his attention."

      Yes, troglodytes, this is the new official definition of Playboy enterprises. Don't believe me? Go to your local book store a week from today, buy the newest edition of any dictionary, navigate to the 'f' section and feast your eyes on the reality of the aforesaid description. As mentioned on www.yahoo.com and various news channels like Fox 5, Playboy owner Hugh Hefner decided to hand over Playboy to this equivalent of Popeye the sailor man, and for good reason: Hugh Hefner is older than sin and finally came to the conclusion that his old age was not enough to handle the myriad of woman Playboy houses. Because of this, he, without hesitation, hired fresh blood for the job, and how could you go wrong by hiring the head of the Canadian Work Force: franky.

      Now that old ass Hugh Hefner is out of the way, the woman of playboy will unleash their deepest concealed desires for this womanizer that were being kept hidden from that old geezer named Hefner. What kind of playboy bunnies does this guy have in his mansion you ask? Wonder no more you curious little annoyances:

      Girls with fat scrumptious butts that would make good pillows to sleep on? ✔ There's no room for flatty patty bullshit in this guy's mansion, and I am sure Jerry LaVigne Jr. agrees with me despite having a video named "Bring Flat Back".
      Girls with boobs that house milk more delicious than those extracted from the most prominent milk cows in the worlds largest dairy farms? ✔
      Girls whose faces would make Shia Labeouf have a sex change? ✔

      As you can see, franky's playboy house has girls of all kinds. There's a reason they call them "Playboy Bunnies": it's because they hop to franky whenever he blows the whistle. As indicated by the check marks above, girls simply borrow a line from Nike and say "just do it" when this guy wants a little something. If you guys are doubting the validity of franky being the new owner of this enterprise, then please look below for the official documentation:


      Look out for further updates. In the future, the domain www.playboy.com will not exist, because it will be renamed to something a whoooole lot better: www.alltheladieswanttodoispleasefranky.com (have a problem with this name? deal with it; it's the truest website name you will ever see, and if that isn't proof enough, just look at the bitch in the very first picture at the top of this visitor message offering this dreamy dreamy dream of a guy a bottle of vodka to please him).
    2. Solace
    3. Bloo
      Hey guys! I'm just here to give a nice little update on the visitor message I left this epitome of perfection on June 17th, 2012, at approximately 7:56:57 PM, EST. Before I do, though, do you fans need that time converted to suit your own timezone? Claro, ningún problema, or for the language-troubled individuals, "sure, no problem". Here you go you needy fucks. Pay close attention to the aforementioned, wipe that drool from your mouth, and give your puppy dog eyes some eye drops to cleanse them of filth so you can comprehend the previous link, because I will NOT be turning back to help those who couldn't catch up with the diction being used here, and neither will this dark magician known as "The Canadian Flag".

      Now, let's get back to business. Please draw your focus to the following posts: #1, #2, #3.

      As has probably already crossed your feeble minds, there's no way any reasonable person could look at those posts without doing a double take with their heads and saying "wait a minute, how the FUCK did franky lose"? If your bullshit senses started ringing after you read posts #1 and #2, then your bullshit signals are functioning well because there's not a word in the English, Spanish, Chinese, or whatever the hell language (doesn't matter what language because franky knows them all; are you jealous, cretant? you should be) to describe the insanity that ensued in this man's World Cup games.

      After scheduling a meeting with the 23 researchers on Smogon, we all did some hard core digging and discovered what REALLY happened in franky's games: he lost to a turn one critical hit in the first game, and turn two critical hit in the second game. I don't know if you're aware of this, ladies and gentleman, but this chick magnet lost in the Smogon Tour semifinals because of a last turn critical hit. It's a shame this game is trying to hate on this man's profound Pokemon skills yet again. In order to show their grief over this guys recent and past losses, the entirety of Canada decided to coordinate a moment of silence to pray for this guy to have better luck in the future, and it worked, seeing as if you direct your attention to the above listed post #3, he emerged victorious in an effortless manner. Big shout out to Antar for putting all of his plans to update the Smogon server with BW2 aside in order to help us get to the bottom of the investigation by scrutinizing through every single damn battle log on Smogon's PO.

      To celebrate the most well-deserved victory in ages, Aunt Jemima, who supplies this king with the finest maple syrup known to Canada out of the most pristine tree in the world, decided to make a quick little trip to his house to bless his ear canals with a newly modified version of the Canadian National Anthem, which goes as following:

      O franky!
      Our savior and lord!
      True love machine please teach all thy sons your woman-seduction techniques.
      With glowing hearts we bow and kiss your Olympic Medal-winning feet,
      From far and wide,
      O franky, we stand on guard for thee.
      Thank you for keeping our land glorious and free!
      O franky, we stand on guard for thee.
      O franky, we stand on guard for thee.

      Thank you, franky, for putting up with all the nonsense Pokemon throws at you. I, along with the rest of www.smogon.com, appreciate it.

      A hearty round of applause for this nigga.

    4. Agammemnon
      Hey franky !
      Do you want to play now ?
    5. Agammemnon
      hey mister f !
      wanna play now ?
    6. Eos
      "who cares"

      ikr haha
    7. Ricky Horror
      Ricky Horror
      tha hell where the really de-modded? Lmao
    8. Bloo

      I am in complete fucking awe of the amount of unjustifiable hate this love machine gets from jealous staff members. Observing the image illustrated above, you will notice three warnings given to this man by moderators whom were attempting to stop this man's rampage when he was actively contributing to Smogon. Let's go through the warnings one by one, shall we? I have no other option but to go through the infractions one by one because franky's fans always need to be babied.

      tab - A person with a generic, boring three-letter name had the fucking audacity to taint this thug's profile with a Forum Specific Rule in the forum this man once ruled with an iron fist, and what for? The reason for the infraction was idiotic and asinine: an infraction for posting a second golden RMT in the span of a week. Are you kidding me? You shouldn't be infracting Smogon's best team builder for having the generosity to share one of his many flawless teams from his secret stash: you should be bowing on your damn knees and wiping his ass when he stands up from his golden toilet, and subsequently asking him if he'd like his team to be showcased in the RMT Archive. Being the Leonardo Da Vinci of Pokemon that he is, he probably wouldn't even want his artwork of teams to be thrown in with lower quality teams like Delko's.

      darkie - A man with a niggerish-like name infracted the pride of the African race? What the hell is wrong with darkie? He infracted franky for posting this picture in a NBA thread, and I honestly don't see why. The aforementioned linked picture demonstrates an all-star professional basketball player giving fellatio to another player. I think this picture clearly shows what franky has to go through everyday: thwarting off the numerous attempts from people trying to suck his scientifically and biologically-gifted genitalia. darkie gave him a lurk more, but this man isn't the one who needs to lurk more, it's the hating ass moderators that need to do so. Speaking of the NBA, did you guys know that franky is actually Michael Jordan? If you didn't, now you fucking do.

      Rising_Dusk - I won't even bother writing a paragraph for this one because this infraction is a clear-cut case of hatred for this steamboat. He infracted him in INSIDE SCOOP? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK? That must've been the first ever infraction to ever been given in that forum, and it's a shame it had to be given to Smogon's #1 user: franky.

      Anyway, idiots, all of the individuals who gave this man an infraction share one thing in common: they were all de-modded. this goes to show the following: mess with this guy and you WILL pay the price, no fucking questions asked.
    9. Bloo

      To all of the annoying dim wads constantly refreshing this profile, stalking this boy wonder's activity, and waiting for the little green light signaling that this rated R superstar is online to turn on: put your glasses on and closely observe the above picture. Before doing so, I suggest taking your eyes off of the picture of franky you have up on your wall for one minute of your life.

      In the above image, you will see that absolutely ZERO games have been completed. Want to know the reason? It's simple: all of franky's opponents are afraid to battle him and as a result, haven't bothered contacting him for a match. 6A9 Ace Matador (who, I should say, has a name which franky simply can not be bothered to lift a finger to spell due to its overly long nature), is the only individual who's even DARED to interact with this man, as seen through these VMs; however, there is no mention of a battle, allowing us to assume he is, indeed, fearful of this Pokemon equivalent of imperfectluck, Gouki, and Loki combined.

      At this rate, his opponents will have to be substituted out of the World Cup in order for this guy to be able to do a battle. Actually -- no -- scratch that. The individuals who are substituted in will also be terrified of this phantom, so the World Cup hosts may as well save this guy the time and hassle and award him with the win, or better yet, the World Cup trophy so he can move along with his life instead of bothering with this kiddy game played by the likes of Sprinkles (who, you guys should know, posted a picture of his penile tissue as an attempt to show the world that he has more package than franky; of course, this absolutely foolish attempt to challenge this man's flawless genetics failed terribly).

      Before I close this off, I'd like to draw the fans of franky to one more detail: Toronto, Canada: this is the location he is situated at in the World Cup. Funnily enough, this man resides in Canada. Even random BRACKETMAKERS realize that this thug belongs nowhere but the country he is viewed as a king by pedestrians, teachers, and people alike: Canada.
    10. Agammemnon
      Hey ! When can you play for WC ? I might be busy this week-end so maybe it's better to schedule something during the incoming week.
      As a reminder, I'm GMT +1.

      Peace, my zen bro'.
    11. SOMALIA
      Same here my brother, been wrestling with what life throws at me everyday not easy lol, tbh bare wasted people not giving out enuff jobs i cant find any ugh
    12. joshe
    13. Aerrow
      what is your summoner name??
    14. BKC
      come back to scooters ):
    15. SOMALIA
      OI OI Franky! wer u been brotha?
    16. 6A9 Ace Matador
      6A9 Ace Matador
      favs are: aokiji, kizaru, marco phoenix

      and ya aokijis cool
    17. Folgorio
      yesssssss cant wait br0
    18. Jackal
    19. 6A9 Ace Matador
    20. uragg
      nigga you weak
    21. uragg
    22. M Dragon
      M Dragon
      nice you are back bro :)
    23. Blue_Star
      f: the return of
    24. yond
      da kid returns
    25. Bloo

      May as well just hand over the world cup trophy to this guy right fucking now so he can go back to chilling in his paradise instead of wasting more time on this kiddy game, because we all know no team can stand in this niggas way. See this post idiots? This Jamaican equivalent of Bob Marley didn't even follow the correct format, simply because the fact of the matter is that franky is the real world cup host, allowing him to do whatever the hell he wants when he steps into that thread and makes his presence known.

      Missed ya loads bro, and by the looks of the endless "I missed you posts" below mine, it seems I am not the only one. GO ON IRC WHEN YOU CAN!
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