The 8 Most Satanic Pokemon

[Ditto]

http://church-of-illumination.com/pokemon-satanic-top8

What have we been doing with our lives!?

 

[Champion Steve]

That one sadly appears to be a joke site. Although the explanation given for Pikachu was rather amusing.

 

[Stratos]

"This Pokemon also evolves into a rather feminine looking pokemon called Raichu.
This may cause children to think that by changing their gender that may gain superpowers."

oh come on they could have AT LEAST picked azurill for this one.

 

[inanimate blob]

"Ho-oh is a rainbow colored Pokemon which is prominently used by homosexuals. This Pokemon is encouraging children to be gay."​

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oh ok i didn't know that most uber players are gay​

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but it makes sense​

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meanwhile, the dog who literally represents demons is left off the list​

 

[blitzlefan]

How did the commenters not realize the site is just a joke?

 

[Huskisson906]

How did the commenters not realize the site is just a joke?

I don't know but it made me and my brother laugh, and Doubly at the comments.

 

[Stratos]

i happened to look at the first comment:

anyone recognize the name? That's right, if you guessed:

Coincidence? I think not

 

[Spinda]

WON'T SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?

 

[xenu]

This Pokemon like many other evolves from something much weaker and smaller.
Evolution is not real and goes against the teachings of God.
Anything that goes against the teachings of God is Satanic therefore Pokemon is Satanic.

this isn't even good satire

 

[GatoDelFuego]

Ho-oh certainly is quite fabulous

 

[tehy]

But can any of these pokemon turn a dead woman gay?

I don't think so

Satanist church>these pokemon

 

[Brambane]

YEAH!!!

WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?

oh right. arceusdammit.

 

[Ditto]

But can any of these pokemon turn a dead woman gay?

I don't think so

Satanist church>these pokemon

I don't know, I think Ho-Oh might be able to!

 

[Quickster]

Needs some more fabulous Simisear

 

[Blue_Tornado]

>Pokemon Fanon Wiki

 

[Princess Bubblegum]

WON'T SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?

 

[moonbound]

Someone buy these guys SMTIV

 

[mattj]

No mention of Drifloon?

It tugs on the hands of children to steal them away.

It is whispered that any child who mistakes DRIFLOON for a balloon and holds on to it could wind up missing.

I mean, this is like Pennywise the Dancing Clown territory.

 

[Champion Steve]

Someone buy these guys SMTIV

Ah, but which is the most Satanic SMT Demon? Satan? Or Lucifer?
Question for the ages there.

 

[Shiruba]

Ah, but which is the most Satanic SMT Demon? Satan? Or Lucifer?
Question for the ages there.

Sorry for ruining the joke, but Lucifer is the name given to Satan before he was cast out of Hell and became Satan. So, to answer the question, Satan is the most Satanic, as Lucifer was actually not a bad guy - just exceptionally selfish.

Growing up Mormon is surprisingly useful in certain situations, ehehe.

Speaking of being raised Mormon, though, this is actually quite similar to their custom of being baptized for the dead. One can go to the temple and be baptized in the name of someone deceased that was not baptized into the Mormon church during their lifetime. This allows them the choice of becoming baptized and thus more eligible for the higher levels of heaven. There are three - from lowest to highest they are the Terrestrial, Tellestial [sp? might be the wrong term], and Celestial kingdoms, the latter of which is only available if one qualifies for a strict set of rules.

 

[some hero]

Lucifer is such a cool name though! I just love the mythology around him.

Better than Hades at least. I mean, Light Bringer? Damn so beautiful and romantic!

 

[KnightoftheWind]

Lucifer is such a cool name though! I just love the mythology around him.

Better than Hades at least. I mean, Light Bringer? Damn so beautiful and romantic!

This ain't the fetish topic bro.

 

[AlakaBAMM]

Um I hate when everything is associated with the devil and cultism, but I have for some time now noticed the resemblance of Kadabra to Baphomet (a pagan figure labeled as satanic by the Christian church), and found this video on YouTube:

I love Kadabra, but I mean, come on!

 

[ck49]

The first page of comments is better.

Internet noobs.

 

[Blue_Tornado]

Egg groups promote conservatism, right?