Could you be your own friend?

[Th!nkPi]

Imagine you met someone with your exact personality. Their habits may be different, they may look entirely different, but they have the same base personality as you and have nearly identical processes in making decisions. Assume they are the same gender as you. Or don't. It really doesn't matter as long as you can look over the gender factor when getting to know others.

I'm not trying to encourage exploits of loopholes in my prompt. Just imagine you met someone on your wavelength and just like you.

Could you tolerate them? Could you befriend them? Could you sleep with them? I'm curious as to what people may answer.

My answer

Referring to the second version of myself as Pi2, I think I could tolerate and respect Pi2. But that's it. Though initially I'd pursue conversing with Pi2 for awhile due to a peculiar interest in quirky people I think I'm too talkative and need someone to balance that out in order to have a friendship (or any real relationship). I would probably get irritated by Pi2 some days and yet find Pi2 hilarious other days. I may think of Pi2 often though, because people with interesting characteristics are usually on my mind. I think others tend to view me in real life as a very quirky person (both good and bad) and I know I'd notice the same in another body. I usually don't blend into crowds. Ultimately, I would prefer to be with others over Pi2, but I would also give credit to Pi2 at times when he makes selfless decisions. That's because I would probably empathize easily and tell Pi2 that I would have done it as well, even if I wouldn't have liked it.

All in all, I think I would admire and respect Pi2 from a distance. It'd be nothing further than tolerating Pi2.

 

[jumpluff]

I really wonder about this sometimes when I'm bored. (Signs of future cat lady?) I have pretty bad self-esteem, and I know from experience that I'm difficult to maintain friendships with. I'm acutely sensitive, but on the other hand, a mirror-me would share that sensitivity and also carefully choose her words; the real question there is if we could get over our resulting social anxiety to talk to each other. I particularly enjoy talking to people who share my interests and passions, so on that level we could connect. However, any friendship between us would undoubtedly progress to mutual instability, and both of us would struggle to maintain open communication, which could be fairly devastating. This has typically been the case with almost all people I've thought were strikingly like myself.

However, there are also qualities about myself that I strive to cultivate, that I'm proud of, that I admire in others. I think I would be able to respond to this in a mirror-me as much as in others. In at least several senses I'm fairly resilient, have nurturing tendencies, generally pretty earnest, and deeply engage with the world around me. I find these qualities some of the most appealing in other people.

Regardless of how absurd this sounds, and everything notwithstanding, I think I could probably have a (topsy-turvy and probably fraught with issues arising from neurotic insecurity, anxiety, introversion, and a weird kind of inhibition, but probably also affectionate) romantic relationship with a mirror-me. If we were able to progress to a point where we understood how similar our feelings and wishes were, then we would probably be okay, because I tend to know exactly what I want, just often worry semi-obsessively about what other people want. I still think I'd prefer to be with someone at least a little different from me, though, a person who could provide a source of stable emotional support and someone I could admire for the traits and interests they have that I lack yet value, someone from whom I could learn a lot. (Maybe if mirror-me came from a different timeline...)

edit that got delayed by server move: In reality, I'm honestly a terrible friend to myself. I'm self-critical to a point of pathology, I hold myself to unrealistic standards that I don't hold others to, and I drive myself hard. Historically I've overly intellectualised my emotions and divorced myself from them rather than feel the full force of them, which is something I see a therapist about, and I've punished myself mentally for showing confidence, instead of being supportive. So, ignoring speculations about multiple timelines colliding, I could definitely stand to be kinder towards myself.

 

[Exzure]

I'm way to shy too go talk to myself lol.

 

[mattj]

We would play video games and float rivers for years on end.

 

[internet]

Whilst my initial reaction is that I'd get along with myself pretty well, I don't really know what it is like to experience the person me from another's perspective. If I do take a liking to myself, however, I might end up spending most of my days talking to mirror me, and the rest of my time would be spent trying to find excuses to initiate conversation without being/seeming annoying, creepy or awkward. And since mirror me is presumed to be happy to respond, I will get very little things done besides talking to myself.

Thoughts like these make me thankful for the existence of timezones.

 

[Kingpoleon]

We wouldn't talk enough, and I can't operate with equal leadership qualities(in real life). I function best as a middleman leader, a lieutenant if you will. I can control a unit with somebody over me, but not with someone and I cooperating exactly equally. But then again, I don't talk much, so it would probably be getting used to my voice. It probably sounds way different than I think it does. People with annoying voice can't tell. I doubt I have one, but people keep insisting that I have a "British accent". Anyway, I could never work with myself, though I would be fun to hang out with.
tl;dr: I'd prefer not to meet me.

 

[SoulMuse]

In all likelihood I would be an absolutely terrible friend for myself, because I am often rather abrasive, sarcastic and sometimes just a downright ass. Couple this with the fact that although I fake otherwise, my self esteem isn't exactly great, nor is my self image(I don't fake that part at all), so I'd probably end up giving myself a mental breakdown. If that didn't happen, I doubt any kind a friendly relationship would work, because I would want to help me with all the stuff in my life ando I would not like that. While having someone to talk to who is on the same intellectual wavelength would be cool, reality is, it isn't worth the stress of it. I'm generally a loner by nature, and so that doesn't help either.

Probably the biggest thing though, is I'm acutely aware of many of my stupid tendencies and traits that hurt me, and I just really don't want to see someone else deal with that.

As for the whole opposite gender thing, and a relationship that way, I can safely say that wouldn't work. At all. I'm nothing close to what I want in a partner, because I need a partner who can balance out me. I couldn't do that.

As kingpoleon said, I'd rather not meet me. In my casebecause frankly I'm sometimes a pretty terrible person, and I have way to much stuff I'd want to help me with and I wouldn't want that. We'd clash to much and it wouldn't be healthy for either of us.

 

[Shinryu]

I could tolerate me, but I'd probably eventually get bored of me as I am admittedly kind of a boring, not very talkative person.

 

[internet]

I'll remember this question as a good way to get people to tell me about their own personality as they see it.

 

[EV]

I'd be perfect for myself because I'd never bug me to hang out.

 

[capefeather]

Based on my interactions with people whom I perceive as pretty similar to me, I think we'd have an argumentative relationship if we mainly interacted on an internet forum or chatroom, and we'd hang out occasionally and play video games if we mainly interacted IRL. There have been a lot of times I've butt heads with people in various internet communities who had seniority and/or ranking over me, and looking back it just really strikes me that some of them are very similar to me. So are our differing perspectives due to the seniority/ranking? I experienced a role-reversal of this in the last week, where I was arguing with someone over the presentation of some fan wiki content. I generally hate the argument by tradition/seniority - the argument that things have always been such and such a way, therefore don't try to change it - so I tried really hard to make sure I wasn't being a hypocrite in my responses. It's been interesting to see both sides of how I might interact with myself on the internet, at least if there were some kind of power imbalance.

As for IRL: A big reason for drifting away from my high school friends was because I became really insecure about my academic troubles (they were pretty major). Though, a lot of that insecurity comes from how the people who are supposed to be closest to me have handled it all. Yet, if this is the case with me, then perhaps it should be the case for mirror-me as well, and neither of us would be the wiser.

 

[Kingpoleon]

In all likelihood I would be an absolutely terrible friend for myself, because I am often rather abrasive, sarcastic and sometimes just a downright ass. Couple this with the fact that although I fake otherwise, my self esteem isn't exactly great, nor is my self image(I don't fake that part at all), so I'd probably end up giving myself a mental breakdown. If that didn't happen, I doubt any kind a friendly relationship would work, because I would want to help me with all the stuff in my life ando I would not like that. While having someone to talk to who is on the same intellectual wavelength would be cool, reality is, it isn't worth the stress of it. I'm generally a loner by nature, and so that doesn't help either.

Probably the biggest thing though, is I'm acutely aware of many of my stupid tendencies and traits that hurt me, and I just really don't want to see someone else deal with that.

As for the whole opposite gender thing, and a relationship that way, I can safely say that wouldn't work. At all. I'm nothing close to what I want in a partner, because I need a partner who can balance out me. I couldn't do that.

As kingpoleon said, I'd rather not meet me. In my casebecause frankly I'm sometimes a pretty terrible person, and I have way to much stuff I'd want to help me with and I wouldn't want that. We'd clash to much and it wouldn't be healthy for either of us.

This is basically what I meant, but I worded mine a little more delicately. I applaud your willingness to openly share it entirely, instead of mincing words like I did, focusing on my positive talents instead of my more numerous negatives.

 

[Brambane]

I would be so pumped to find someone with an identical personality to me. It is so hard to find people who get I excited as I do at finding a slug in the backyard.

 

[colours]

No, I wouldn't, truth be told.

There are many reasons, but the primary one is that I'm so ridiculously introverted that I just plain wouldn't really hangout with them. I'm not necessarily a "boring" person per se (my life as a whole is generally uneventful though, sadface), but by choice (and mostly out of fear at the same time), I just wouldn't really talk with them, and to an extent, I would avoid them purely because I wouldn't want to be a bother, among other things.

 

[Spacewizard]

Yeah I could be my own friend because I'm not a chump.
Edit: Or a nerd.

 

[Jordanious]

I WOULD NOT want to be my friend. one day I wake up angry at the world, right before butt-kissing the floor yesterday for my sins.
It's gotta be the prescription pills.

 

[im still obnoxious and my mom still doesnt like me]

I'm conceited, arrogant, consider myself superior to others, and overall a bad guy to hang out with (unless I know you well and like you).

Guess what happens if I meet myself.

 

[TheValkyries]

Because my last comment was deleted for being unhelpful, let me spell out the gist of what I was getting at. Every person in here who thinks for one moment that they wouldn't be friends with themselves is dead fucking wrong. There exist on this earth RIGHT FUCKING NOW people who love each and every single one of you people unconditionally. Be it family, friends or significant others or whatever, man, there is someone who loves you. And there are thousands of of other people you have never met and will never meet who are capable of feeling that precise love. To even begin to assert that you could not even begin to even get along with your own self would not only make you a liar, it also makes you disrespectful to the people who DO care about you. As if they're lesser people who simply can't see and appreciate you correctly.

And you know what? Fuck that noise. You're all fucking great people. Every single one of you. Don't let anyone, tell you different, ESPECIALLY not yourself.

/preach

 

[internet]

Most people in this thread who claim they would not be their own friend in case of a mirror version, are sayin it's because either: The similar personality creates conflict rather than understanding, or because they wouldn't interact enough to realize the similarity.

Meanwhile, it might be interesting to consider meeting a mirror-me that is either younger or older by a few years (which, you know, should result in the same situation regardless). Assuming an age difference of 3 - 4 years, I feel like that could be a far healthier friendship, as while I feel like interwebs senior might be more welcoming towards the barnacle act than most victims to it have been in the past, I don't feel like he would respond by doing the same, because I think interwebs senior might be slightly annoyed by interwebs junior at times. But if interwebs junior would become inactive for a day or two, interwebs senior would definitely be wondering where he went.

 

[Ampharos]

I would play the shit out of some LoL with myself, but conversing would be difficult because both of us have the same insight and opinions to offer to a conversation, so it would quickly go stale.

 

[Acklow]

You probably would make short quips about each other's terrible plays. I can see it happen though.

 

[Mia Wallace]

This would be the best way to finish games quicker so we can talk about how bad story telling is in modern gaming. Or Talk about how Books made into movies always get over hyped. I'd probably eventually end up hating myself though. I hate myself now, so it wouldn't surprise me. Actually, no. I wouldn't want to be my own best friend.

 

[internet]

Hating yourself now is no gaurantee that you will hate a person just like yourself, as you will see them as others see you, not as you see you. With a few key differences there, you might not even realize the full extent of the similarity at all.

 

[AdultIcarus]

While it is mentally impossible to have someone with the same personality as you, as everyone is different, meeting someone like me would be strange for me. I am a complete nerd, and I normally go under the assumption that a nerd in my viewpoint may be different as I know said person. Getting off topic here, it would be a difficult matter, and I'm a difficult person to get along with anyway.

 

[AWailOfATail]

Why wouldn't I like someone just like me? I'm the funniest guy I know.

But seriously, it'd actually be really cool. They'd understand when I needed some space or why I keep doing something that pisses everybody else off. And other than it being strange to meet someone just like you, I can't really see why you wouldn't get along. If you'd be unhappy with them, doesn't that mean you're unhappy with yourself?