Electronics and parents

[Rugi]

Alright theres no way for me to write this without sounding like a spoiled little shit so here I go.

My school uses this task manager called "Compass." Pretty much all my homework, my classes and my behavior in my classes are uploaded throughout the course of the day for me and my parents to see. a while back my mum was checking Compass and spotted that I haven't given in 4 articles of homework (conveniently ignoring the 17 pieces of homework I have given) and she got mad. So mad that she decided to lock off my home computer and take away my 3DS as well as demanding to the school to remove all my programs and admin privileges off of my school netbook. At the moment I can browse a limited amount of internet (slightly expanded when I'm at home) and thats about it.

Admittedly I do have problems. On a day where I don't have school and I have no place to go out to I will use computer for around 8 hours a day. But I can't handle a complete lack of video games and restricted internet especially now that its been nearly a month with nothing else to do. I can't go to friends houses on the weekdays since my parents prohibit it and my weekend mornings are taken up by assorted schools and activities.

To make matters even worse my mum recently read an article on Hikikomoris and has come to false assumption that I'm one of them. Leading her to become absurdly panicky and she is now trying to figure out a way to get the school to take away my netbook as well. I've talked to her multiple times but I don't even know what to say anymore and I'm finding it really hard not to get mad. The majority of my friends play video games and not being able to play with them is driving me mad. My results in school are starting to drop and I'm getting really angry.

tl;dr I didn't finish four pieces of homework use a lot of computer and my mum is mad at me because she thinks I'm gonna fail in life. What do I do?

if this is too ranty move it to firebot or something I dunno

 

[Kink]

Sounds like everything will fix itself when you leave the confines of high school and understand how to balance work + fun. As sympathetic as I am, I have a Russian Jew mother, so insane expectations is something I've had to deal with my whole life. Buckle down, be a man, do your duty to yourself and your education and everything else will fall into place.

At the end of the day she's your mother and mothers just want the best for their kids. If you approach this situation knowing that your mother loves you and she's just scared for your future, I think you'll be able to deal with it better.


TL;DR do your homework. You've already lost madre's trust so regaining it via disciplined behaviour will take a while. Stay focused, this site will still be here when you're finished.

 

[DarkMilotic]

I know that feeling. However, as is with most parents, they're just trying to help you understand how you should conduct yourself once you're given more freedom. Just respect her, ride out this punishment, and try joining a few clubs or something to fill the gap. (Or make her see how happy you are without them. Reverse Psychology always worked on my mum and shortened my punishments ;) Don't take it too far though.)

Best of luck!

 

[Chou Toshio]

In addition to everything Kings UU said, maybe sit down and line out specific expectations-- ie. agree on exact terms that will get your games and other stuff back. Something like 1 month with academic performance X should be sufficient-- especially if the school is giving her that much access to your daily activities.

 

[Ortheore]

Admittedly I do have problems. On a day where I don't have school and I have no place to go out to I will use computer for around 8 hours a day. But I can't handle a complete lack of video games and restricted internet especially now that its been nearly a month with nothing else to do. I can't go to friends houses on the weekdays since my parents prohibit it and my weekend mornings are taken up by assorted schools and activities.

This is standard for me lol.

For real tho it's a shit situation. By the sounds of things your mother doesn't understand that extensive computer use need not be anti-social or unproductive, which I imagine isn't uncommon for people who haven't grown up around the internet (I know it's the case with my mum lol). We all know that modern friendships span electronic and irl interactions seamlessly but they don't get it. On top of that it sounds like your parents are being really restrictive in general. Like idk what's up with not seeing friends during the week seems excessive, but maybe that's just me.

I mean you've probably tried this but try talking to your parents from the angle of assuming greater responsibility as you're growing up, preparing yourself by learning the self-management skills required for uni (or w/e) all that jazz. I honestly don't see why they wouldn't be cool with say a time limit on gaming in a week, or even something like letting you play games except if you failed to complete all your homework the week before. If you make sure your conversation with them gives the impression that it's an adult to adult attempt at resolving a dispute, I imagine you'd be able to negotiate some sort of compromise. Not to mention that an absolutist stance is really unhealthy and if your marks have dropped then you have evidence to back that point up. If you've tried that then idk. Basically you've got to be seen as mature by them in order for them to respond.

Then again, if I were in your shoes I'd probably have escalated the conflict long ago so what do.