Walrus do u like older music von (A Walrus) - Won by Morgan

[vonFiedler]

15th
6 Points
UncleSam

Lily, Rosemary and the Jack of Hearts - Bob Dylan

This is another very intricate story that takes a lot of listens to parse. There's a lot going on with multiple stories going on at once and lots of dramatic foreshadowing. Unfortunately kind of droning for a Dylan song.

 

[vonFiedler]

14th
6.3 Points
Morgan

Alice's Restaurant Masacree - Arlo Guthree

This feels far more like a comedy skit than an actual song, which makes sense from what I know of the submitter. This was definitely interesting to listen to once, but I wouldn't throw it in my library.

 

[vonFiedler]

13th
6.4 Points
KnightsofCydonia

Ode to Billy Joe - Bobbie Gentry

This is a pretty chill sounding song. The story is okay. It mostly serves to set a certain mood I think, and it works pretty well.

 

[vonFiedler]

12th
6.7 Points
Granny Pie

The Saga Begins - Weird Al

Finally we get some Weird Al that is actually really good. This actually has somewhat more of a story than the original does, and is still a pretty good song.

 

[vonFiedler]

11th
7 Points
IcarusShadow

Small Change - Tom Waits

Very classy. Tom Waits is perfect for this category, and while he's usually hard to judge purely for his songs, this one is actually pretty cool.

 

[vonFiedler]

10th
7.2 Points
Yeti

Europa and the Pirate Twins - Thomas Dolby

The vocals had to grow on me, but when they did, boy was this a jam. I wasn't aware of this singer either, so it's pretty cool. The story is pretty neat too.

 

[vonFiedler]

9th
7.3 Points
Myzozoa

We Don't Care - Kanye West

This message song functions a lot better in how it tells its story than earlier ones. Late sub, so not much to say right now.

 

[vonFiedler]

8th
7.4 Points
Asek

Breadcrumb Trail - Slint

Sorta grungey, okay. This is a good way to tell a story in a song. You've got descriptive storytelling that gives way to lyrical choruses full of feeling. I wish I could hear some of the lyrics more easily though.

 

[vonFiedler]

7th
7.7 Points
Martin

A Boy Named Sue - Johnny Cash

The last country song on the list, but this is a lot like what I expected from submissions. A good story that follows all the standard plot conventions, a good twist, and all in less than four minutes. Not bad to listen to either.

 

[vonFiedler]

6th
7.8 Points
Cancerous

The Watchmaker's Apprentice - The Clockwork Quartet

Trying not to hear Hans Zimmer in the ticking... This is pretty devilishly neat. I didn't expect something like this, but I'm glad I got it.

 

[vonFiedler]

5th
8.2 Points
icecoolblue

Dance with the Devil - Immortal Technique

Real heavy hitters from here on out. Wow, that Godfather sample. The rapping here is absolutely sick, but the real draw is the horror story being told here. Really worth paying close attention to.

 

[vonFiedler]

4th
8.3 Points
The Quasar

The Rime of the Ancient Mariner - Iron Maiden

A metal adaptation of a poem. This is not only pretty rad, but I feel it retains the intent of the original pretty well.

 

[vonFiedler]

3rd
9.1 Points
Jellicent

Common People - Pulp

Here's a good rule of thumb: if the meaning of your chorus changes multiple times over the course of your song, it's probably a really good story song. This is really slick sounding too. It's exactly what I wanted to be introduced to from this category.

 

[vonFiedler]

2nd
9.6 Points
Eagle4

Story 2 - clipping.

Holy fuck. How can a song be so fascinating and intense in only two minutes? This has the opposite problem to other songs in this category. It's hard to judge something that is only two minutes purely as a song instead of as a story. This never takes the time to breath, but it feels like it shouldn't. Great submission. Guess you don't need to send rap anymore?

 

[vonFiedler]

1st
9.7 Points
Blazade

The Great Escape - Seventh Wonder

Alright people, clear out. It's a 30 minute metal adaptation of a poem. Thank Christ this didn't place 2nd to 10th. Not only is this submission trying REALLY hard on the story front, it's also just very good metal.

 

[vonFiedler]

Category Six, Worst Songs, will be Saturday at 6 PM PST

 

[vonFiedler]

Blazade Eagle4 Granny Pie LightWolf

Need your subs.

 

[Ullar]

vons just spiteful bc he knows im prettier than him from irl experience

haters gonna hate

 

[vonFiedler]

30th
2 Points
Martin

Barbie Girl - Aqua

This is the most annoying song in the world when you're 10. But when you grow up and realize it actually has something clever to say about the objectification of women in our society, you don't mind admitting that it's fairly catchy. It's not a great song or anything. The vocals are bad in a way that I can only hope is intentional. But I kept returning to this just because I liked listening to it.

 

[vonFiedler]

29th
2.1 Points
IcarusShadow

Dum Surfer - King Krule

I thought Icarus would do well in this cat, because he interrupts every gathering we have with weird songs just to annoy us. The thing is, I'm almost never the target of this annoyance. So this is some pretty interesting outsider music. I like it.

 

[vonFiedler]

28th
2.2 Points
Myzozoa

Fuck the Pain Away - Peaches

Poor Myzo. I subbed a different Peaches song to someone else's walrus unironically.

 

[vonFiedler]

27th
2.4 Points
atomicllamas

I'm Too Sexy - Right Said Fred

Yeah, I know my generation shouldn't have let this song become a thing. But yours shouldn't have let I'm Sexy and I Know It become a thing.

 

[vonFiedler]

26th
2.7 Points
SketchUp

The Nothing - Kid Cudi

This song is certainly really weird, but it's not nothing. Interesting atmospheric stuff.

 

[vonFiedler]

25th
2.8 Points
Walrein

Dream Genie - Lightning Bolt

I could see why this song was submitted at first with those brbrbrbrbrbrs going on, but as I let it play in full, it grew on me. It's not great, but kind of a chillout rock track.

 

[vonFiedler]

24th
3 Points
icecoolblue

STFU - Pink Guy

I mean, I thought we both kind of liked this guy sometimes. Also, it's pretty intentional, which I frown on. Maybe this was just for the laughs, but this was the guy who showed me all my worst music, so I'd have expected him to conform better.