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Since your warstory is locked, and it seems only a few comments got posted, I thought I'd add my thoughts here. Firstly I think people take things far too seriously as far as warstories go. I thought your English was pretty good considering it isn't your first language. The formatting wasn't...

That's because Smogon isn't right about everything, and it's impossible to regulate creative writing. People need to stop taking warstories so seriously. Good Warstory 9/10.

Despite this not being the best warstory I've ever read, it was a refreshing change. My personal favourite moments were: 'Damage calcs are for people who actually want to win more than they lose, aswell as (the other rubbish had died somehow, don't really care. One of the funniest warstories...

Just had a quick look at your team, and whilst it isn't bad for a first team, you're missing a couple of things - firstly Excadrill, whilst being agreat offensively, really need sandstorm to be a real threat to most teams. I would also recommend running a Stealth Rock user, personally I'd use...

You may want to run another Toxic user on your team if your having trouble with walls like Slowbro, as it can force a switch. Chansey may still be a problem, as Aromatherapy is so common, but even so, worth considering

Well, you get extra coverage on Dark types, and it's good for hitting stuff that resists iron head, and don't mind Sucker Punch (bulky Waters like Gastrodon/Suicune etc), so I'd say keep Brick Break over Sub. Bisharp is also immune to Toxic, so blocking that is less important, although TWave/WoW...

I plan om trialing both, however for now I'm just testing both. Omastar is good to have because it's a special attacker, but Ferraligatr can be very powerful, and the priority Aqua Jet is super useful. I'm even considering Sharpedo for that team spot, so it's all undecided, need to look at some...

Just a quick point about using Toxic on a CB Entei: If anyone sees you go for a toxic first turn, then they'll never expect you to be choiced, then when the have to take a flare blitz from a 541 attack RU monster, they won't know what hit them. Without any SpA investment I think that HO Grass is...

I have to say that you really like exclamation marks...

The reason I went with physical Sceptile and not specs, was that I already have 2 choice users on my team (well 3 if you count Uxie). Having 3 choice users will often make it too easy for my opponent to set up on me. I would switch out Entei's Choice Band, or Mamectric's scarf, but I think they...

Bump...

Although I would recommend Phsychic on Gengar over HPfire...

Yeah Focus blast is really useful on Gengar, just look at the usage stats, it hits Ferrothron hard, excadrill & Tyranitar both 4x weak to it. It is a great counter to steel types, and the extra power definately makes it better than HP fighting, especially due to all the Steels around atm...

I would say run fire punch extremespeed, outrage, DDance Dragonite. Depending on how you want to play it, the other option would be to swap Extremespeed out for Roost, but as this is more of an offensive team, I'd stick to extremespeed as a psuedo revenge killer, whether you run life...

Yeah, I made a quick dream world team, met this team/variant of it twice against different people out of around 5/6 times. Good team, but for now a little to common, shame because it seems like a really good offensive team, which I'm all for instead of stalling :)

I might have to try out this team, or something similar at least, I mainly play standard and not Dream World, so this could be an interesting sun team to trial...

Also, one minor alteration I've made is I'm now running a Jellicent with max HP & Defense, leftovers, and Scald, Shadow Ball, Psychic, and taunt/Toxic (I'm still undecided)

Bump, I'll only do this once, but I would like someone's opinion :L

Also just a quick point, quick claw is actually an illegal item on standard rules, due to it's ability to completely change the outcome based purely out of luck. Just a heads up.

Let's start off with your lead, Whilst getting up enrty hazards is good, you have no real attacking moves on your forretress. I would recommend running Earthquake, Stealth Rock Rapid spin, and either Spikes/Toxic spikes with leftovers. That EV spread is quite good. I personally prefer Ferrothorn...