Originally Posted by Fat THB
I appreciate the time and thought you put into this. You detailed at length your thought process, and the percentages and pictures throughout made for a clean presentation.
However, I felt you elaborated too much. I was already turned off when when I saw multiple paragraphs to read before turn one. If you feel you have to do a tl;dr explanation, then it probably is too long to read.
As the battle continued, you broke down even trivial decisions which, for any experienced battler, had obvious conclusions. It's offputting to slog through an entire paragraph when the reader already knows what's coming up next. The unnecessary block of text for obvious turns constantly disrupted the flow of the battle.
A few misplays turned me off as well. Turn 19, as you've already stated, should've been an Earth Power, saving your Nidoking the Shadow Ball from Shanderaa, and also, as you pointed out, all of Nidoking's last Ice Beams should've been Flamethrowers.
The worst misplay was by your opponent, who threw away the battle when it should've ended based on a speed tie if he had thought through his endgame. He sac'ed his Ditto against your Genosekuto, when he should've just sac'ed any of his other three pokemon. He could then send his Ditto back out, transform into Genosekuto, and mash Flamethrower, forcing you to sac your Nidoking. In the end, the winner would've been decided on a coinflip as you sent back in your Genosekuto for a possible sweep with Flamethrower.
Also, this is just a personal preference, but I would've set up SR while Heatran was behind a Sub against Ttar.
All in all, with the misplays and unneeded length, I didn't like this warstory as much as other posters seemed to. However, your effort is noted, and anyone who uses Nidoking is awesome. Just learn to cut out unnecessary words, sentences, and even paragraphs, which will improve all of your writing in general.
7/10
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