Chillers: YOU! BRINEY!
Briney: *SNOOOOORE*
Chillers: Dammit, Derpy, wake him up.
Derpy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
Briney: AAGH! My what a fright you gave me, ready to set sail?
Chillers: Yeah on to Slateport.
Briney: Of course! PEEKO DARLING! TIME TO GO SWEETIE!
Peeko: Wiiin!
Derpy: *Crushes Peeko under a rock*
Briney: …
Derpy: AAAAAAAAAAAARRROOOOOONNN!!!!
Chillers: You ok? Hello? Hellooooo?
Briney: …
-Later at Route 109-
Little girl: YO TRAINER!!! IF YOU’RE TOO HOT TO TROT OR COOL CAT NOT, COME TO MY PAPAS SPOT!!!
Chillers:
NO!!!
-Slateport-
Chillers: Yo, balding dude, where’s Capt. Sperm?
Balding Dude: Um, My names Dock and Capt. STERN isn’t here at the moment, go and find him.
Chillers: Cock and Sperm? You two have matching Pokemon and purses?
Dock: Not Pokemon.
Chillers: … *Leaves*
Dock: Wait…NO! WAIT! WE DON’T HAVE MATCHING PURSES!!!
Chillers: What’s this? Aqua grunts huddling around a museum. This’ll be fun.
Aqua Grunt 187: OH SHIT!!! IT’S YOU!!! EVERYBODY RUN!!!
Chillers: Glad ya remember me.
Aqua Grunt 187: Here, take this TM. Please don’t kick my ass.
Chillers: Ehhh, I don’t know. How about this I’ll give you ten seconds to run.
Aqua Grunt: Really? Thank you!
Chillers: 1…2…3…
Aqua Grunt 187: *Flees*
Chillers: Anyway, maybe I’ll find Sperm here.
???: WOW!!! LOOK AT THIS DOCK!!!
Chillers: Found him. Hey, you Sperm?
???: Um, no. My name’s Stern. I was just admiring this model of a dock.
Chillers: You mean dick.
Stern: What?
Chillers: Whatever, here take this. *Hands over Parcel*
Stern: Wow! Goods! Thank you!
Chillers: ‘WHAT!!! I LET ANOTHER BATCH OF POT PASS ME BY!!? DAMMIT!!!’
Aqua Grunt ???: HEY!!! Our boss wants those goods!
Aqua Grunt ???: Yeah, so hand them over!
Stern: AY NO! Girl! Help me!
Chillers: I have a name!
Stern: You never told me your name!
Chillers: YOU NEVER ASKED!!!
Aqua Grunt ???: Oh, wow. They have a good point.
Aqua Grunt ???: Yeah, let’s introduce ourselves.
Aqua Grunt ???: I’m Aqua Grunt 188!
Aqua Grunt ???: I’m Aqua Grunt 189!
Aqua Grunt 188: Now prepare for battle!
Aqua Grunt 189: Woah! Dude that was my line!
Aqua Grunt 188: Does it really matter?
Aqua Grunt 189: YOU ALWAYS DO THIS!!!
Aqua Grunt 188: Do what!?
Aqua Grunt 189: STEP ALL OVER MY LINES!!!
Aqua Grunt 188: UGH!!! You’re impossible to work with!!!
Aqua Grunt 189: I’m Impossible?
Aqua Grunt 188: Yeah.
Aqua Grunt 189: I’m Impossible!?
Aqua Grunt 188: Yeah.
Aqua Grunt 189: I’m Impos-
Aqua Grunt 188: YEAH!!!
Aqua Grunts 188 & 189: *Continue to bicker and argue*
Chillers and Stern: *Sneaks away*
Stern: Boy, that was a close one.
Chillers: No. Not really.
Stern: Anyway, thanks for the pot. *Walks away*
???: WOW! Did you drive out Team Aqua? And give that guy pot?
Chillers: Oh, it’s the fat guy. Yeah, I did.
???: Oh, I’m sorry allow me to introduce myself. I’m Scott. I’m searching for strong trainers!
Chillers: And?
Scott: And I’m gonna keep an eye on you for a while, so you better put on a show. *Winks then slaps Chiller’s ass*
Chillers: *Throws Scott into the Ocean*
-Route 110-
Chillers: Let’s see if I can find any new Pokemon, you three are getting boring.
Bloons: Lomb?
Chillers: YES YOU! Wait…I have no idea what you’re saying. Am I going mad? WHY DO I TLAK TO MYSELF!!!???
Electrike: Electrike!!! *Tackles Bloons*
Chillers: You’ll do fine. Great ball, GO!!!
Electrike: *Wiggle wiggle wiggle DING!*
Chillers: I don’t know why, but for whatever reason, I’m going to name you Power. C’mon let’s go loot that ugly house up ahead.
Power: BARK!
Chillers: NO!!! DON’T DO THAT!!!
Power: *Whimpers*
Chillers: Good, you can do that. It shows that you fear me. * Walks into the ugly hosue*
Chillers: Hello? Anybody here? ‘Good, easier to loot.’
Table: *Wobble wobble*
Chillers: Huh? Why are you hiding under a table?
???: DAMMIT!!! HOW’D YOU FIND ME!!!
Chillers: You’re under a table. Wasn’t that hard.
???: Oh, well anyways, I’m the Trick Master!!! Come with me to my back room.
Chillers: Ew, no.
Trick Master: I have candy.
Chillers: Candy? CAAAAAAAAAAANDDDYYYY!!!
Trick Master: *Disappears*
Chillers: *Runs into back room* BITCH WHERE MY CANDY? Huh? Oh what joy, a maze.
Little girl: Help me! I’ve been lost for two days now!!! That man promised me candy, tricked me into this maze, and then raped me!!!
Chillers: Ha, no candy for you. *Progresses*
Little girl 2: NO! DON’T COME CLOSER!!! I CAN’T TAKE ANOTHER BRUTAL RAPING!!!
Chillers: I’m not a rapist.
Little girl 2: Oh!!! Thank goodness.
Chillers: Wait did you get any candy?
Little girl 2: No.
Chillers: HAHAHAHAHA!!! *Progresses*
Little boy: H-help me!!! I’ve been in here for THREE MONTHS!!! THREE!!! Three months with no food and horrible rape sessions every Tuesday!
Chillers: Isn’t today Tuesday?
Little bot: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!
Chillers: HAHAHAHAHA!!! Sucker. *Progresses*
Trick Master: Ah, so you’ve made it. Are you ready?
Chillers: For my candy? Yes.
Trick Master: No…a raping.
Chillers: … HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Good one, now give me my candy.
Trick Master: I’m going to rape you then cut off one or your fingers.
Chillers: *Switches into Kickass mode* Give… me… my… candy… NOW!!!
Trick Master: RAPEY TIME!!!!
Chillers: *Kicks the Trick Master’s ass in the most brutal way you could think of then pickpockets him*
TrickMaster: Ugggggh.
Chillers: Thanks for the candy!
Trick Master: D-don’t eat th-that.
Chillers: Oh well. *Eats*
Trick Master: F-fool, that candy was meant f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-
Chillers: *Kicks Trick Master*
Trick Master: FOR Pokemon. Huff. Huff.
BEFORE YOU READ ON PLEASE LISTEN TO THIS RELAXING MUSIC WHILE YOU ENJOY CHAPTER FIVE, THANK YOU!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQsAT...eature=related
Chillers: What do you mean for Poke- … WOO HOO!!! *Runs off in a blaze, crashing through the wall first of course*
Betty: Hey Chillers!!! Long time no see. Have you ever noticed that Pokemon don’t have any visible genitals, yet are able to reproduce?
Chillers: *Punches then runs off*
Betty: Ouch! Wow, she’s so dedicated. I idle that kind of determination. I promise Marshtomp, I will find your hidden genitalia. This could go either one of two ways, hard or rock hard.
Marshtomp: Maaaaarsh???
-Mauville-
???: Hey there, my names Rydle, you seem really energetic-
Chillers: GIMME! GIMMIE! GIMMIE! GIMMIE A BIKE!!! NOOOOOOOOOWWWW!!!
Rydle: Um, yeah ok-
Chillers: GO DERPY!!! KILL THE NICE MUH-MUH-MUH-MUH-MAN!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW!!!
Derpy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! *Humps Rydle’s Leg*
Rydle: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Chillers: *Steals a bike* WHEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
Wally: Hey, it’s the flat chested girl. HEEEY! CHILLERS!!! OVER HERE!!!
Chillers: *Runs over Wally* BITCH!!!
Wally: *Twitches*
Chillers: *Crashes into gym window* OLD MAN!!!!!!! BATTLE MY POKEMAAAAANNNNSSS!!!
???: My name is Watt-
Chillers: I DON’T-DON’T-DON’T CARE!!! FIGHT NOW!!! GO POWER!!!
Power: ELECTRIKE!!!
Chillers: WHO THE HELLA ARE YOU!!???
-Earlier-
Electrike: Electrike!!! *Tackles Bloons*
Chillers: You’ll do fine. Great ball, GO!!!
-Present Time-
Chillers: WHATEVAAAAS!!! KILL THE OLD MAN AND HIS POKMEON!!!!
Wattson: WO HO HO!!! Pokemon can’t kill other Pokemon. I love your silly antics!
Chillers: YONOQUIEROHABLARYONECESTIOLOSANOSENTREDEMIPANTELON ESFUEGOFUEGO!!!
Wattson: …was that Spanish?
Chillers: AAAAAAAAAARGH!!!! SPARKLES!!! NOW!!!
Power: ELEC!!!
Wattson: GO MAGNETON!!!
Chillers: KILL THAT!!! KILL THAT!!! KILL THAT!!! KILLLLLLLLL THAAAAAAT!!!
Power: ELEC-TRIKE!!!
Chillers: YOU! YOU! YOU OLD MAN WHO WEARS DIAPERS IN HIS SPARE TIME BUILDING ROCKET CITYS ‘CUZ YOU NEED TO SLEEP ON A ROCK FOR BATTERY POWER AND YOUR DUMB!!!!
Wattson: What?
Chillers: GIMMIE MY BADGE!!!!
Wattson: Were still in the middle of our battle.
Chillers: BADGE NOW!!! *Tries to use bike*
Birch’s voice: You can’t use that now-
Chillers: SCREW OFF BTICH!!! I’LL DO WHATEVERS I FEELS LIKE TO DO!!! *Cycles over to Wattson in attempt to run him over but presses a floor switch by accident causing electricity to flow between two poles causing Chillers to get shocked* ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTTTTT TTTTTTTTT!!!! *Blacks out*
Narrator: Well, didn’t Chillers get into a sticky situation. Since she unconscious, we’ll be following Betty for a while and see how his adventure is going.
-Route 117-
Betty: Oh, oh Marshtomp.
Marshtomp: Maaaaar!!!
Betty: I knew all along you would of wanted rock hard, well here it is.
Marshtomp: Maaaaaaaaarshtomp!!!
Betty: Yes…yes…yes! Show me your genitals!
Marshtomp: Marrrrsh!!!
Betty: C’mon now, don’t be shy-
Daycare Man: Um, sir. You’re not allowed to be behind this fence.
Betty: Can’t you see I’m in the middle of something!? I’d ask you to join, but you’re all wrinkly.
Daycare Man: Please sir, pull up your pants, you’re scaring away customers.
Betty: No way man, I’m making a discove-…Marshtomp.
Marshtomp: Marsh?
Betty: Is this your c-…It’s not mine, so…DAMMIT MAN!!! YOU MADE ME MISS MY POKEMON’S CLIMAX!!! Now I’ll never know if my Pokemon have genitals.
Daycare Man: GET OUT!!!!
-Mauville-
Betty: Man, that guy was mean, but at least we had fun, right Marshtomp?
Marshtomp: Maarsh!!!
Betty: Hey, lets go check out that gym over there. There’s bound to be cute boys, what do you say?
Marshtomp: MAAAAR!!!
Betty: That’s the spirit!!! LETS GO!!! *Runs inside*
Marshtomp: Mar?
Betty: Hey, why is everyone cuddling around that trainer? *Walks over* OMIGOSH!!! IT’S CHILLERS!!!
Wattson: You know this freak?
Betty: HECK YEAH!!! WE’RE BFFL’S!!!
Wattson: Um…ok. Maybe you can help her, she blacked out.
Betty: I know what to do!!! This happens to my mom all the time… WAKE UP YOU SLUTTY BITCH!!! YOU’RE PREGNANT!!!
Chillers: …
Betty: Well, it works on my mom.
Wattson: Dammit! That’s it. I’m throwin’ her in the trash.
Betty: WAIT!!! Let me try one thing.
Narrator: Instead of the stupid dialogue the author always does, he is going to switch writing styles for this one part.
So, the snowy haired boy got on his knees and leaned over. Out of desperation he pressed his lips up against those of the unconscious beauty. Getting lost in the moment, he craved more. Trying to push his tongue past her cold, pink lips, the girl started to awaken. She quickly grabbed a Pokeball from her belt and clamped the boy’s crotch with it. As he struggled to get the ball of his balls, she jammed her fist in his face.
“WHAT THE FU-“
The End