Дурак Mafia | Ordinary Comrades Win

[Ditto]

Obvious fake, it says MeowMixx instead of Walrein!

[Paperblade]

I bet Walrein's scumteam silenced and inspected meowmixx

[Acklow]

I bet he's an Awesomenaut and not an Aquanaut this time.

[UncleSam]

Ya Walrein isn't doing anything so I guess it's time to get a capable leader

I hadn't stepped up yet because I thought my role unprovable but I figured out a way to prove myself given that it appears we aren't going to lynch anyone today anyway:

Originally Posted by Fat billymills

Dear Unclesam,

You are Boris Yeltsin, the president.

The recently elected leader of the largest nation in the world. The fall of communism has treated you comfortably, but you know there’s a conspiracy about, one that could ruin you completely. Your government is compromised so you won’t be able to use the secret service to your advantage. You’ll have to rely on your popularity to figure out who the culprits are.

You represent the majority of citizens in Russia, and unfortunately many of them are apathetic. If any of them were to skip voting on a major plebiscite, you would represent their interests. However you can only represent the people who approve of you.

You win if the Ordinary Comrades win.

billy says that "approve" means anyone who is village, so here's how I am going to prove myself: the next FOUR (4) users will vote to lynch me, as I am quite confident even if they are all villagers that the village has at least nine members. I will vote to no lynch. If I survive then it is clear I am clean.

There is no downside to following this plan because if I am lying you lynch a mafia, and if I waste some lynch stop or lynch redirect I would've used it later on anyway, so better for the village to waste it on a day with a no lynch anyway, right?

So ya once I survive with a no lynch I want everyone to claim to me, it is fairly obvious my role is village. But first put my plan into motion.

So, for my part:
No Lynch

Oh and by the way if you can't find me on IRC go on league of legends and friend UncleSamsCabin, I'm on that a lot more frequently.

[askaninjask]

i'm important

Vote Unclesam

[Paperblade]

this seems legit

lynch US

[More Cowbell]

Sure thing.

Lynch UncleSam

[little gk]

democracy unclesam

[UncleSam]

Alright that's enough for now

Just remember to claim to me when there is a no lynch

[Walrein]

Originally Posted by Fat UncleSam

Ya Walrein isn't doing anything

i havent been home today bs

[zorbees]

itt: unclesam is a lynchproof mafia planning to fool you all and gather all the info

EDIT:

[9:22pm] zorbees: if baltimore wins you have to have avatar of my choice, if new england loses you have to have avatar of my choice
[9:23pm] jalmont: deal

so i can document this for later

EDIT2: also aska i like your avatar

[Vintage Books]

well our precious dear unclesam could be infact a mysterious evil doer of some kind trying to confuse our poor minds into giving him our identities? Trust him with caution

[Princess Bri]

No lynch

[UncleSam]

Princess Bri you have to unvote idk why you are voting no lynch but the whole point is to prove my role

[billymills]

While a small number of you clamor for what appears to be assisted suicide, a larger portion decides that no lynch is the best option.

Before you all disappear, the nightly news broadcast begins. Luckily its short.

Originally Posted by Fat Kent Brockman

I, for one, welcome our new comrade overlords.

While you all ponder this very deep statement, night happens.

You have until 1:30 AM EST January 17th to submit Night 1 actions.

[UncleSam]

Ya so I am obviously telling the truth I expect claims from everyone within 24 hours.

I'll send out actions after that.

[LightWolf]

WHAT IF PRINCESS BRI WAS TRIPLE MAYOR?

Or your mafia team had secret votes. Or your mafia team could redirect an already cast vote and you were mayor. Options are limitless, and a good bunch of them makes you bad (the overwhelming majority makes you good, but i shall ignore those for logical fallacy's sake)

[UncleSam]

First of all a mafia team having five votes would be retarded in a game this small, second of all if you read the update flavor...

Originally Posted by Fat billymills

While a small number of you clamor for what appears to be assisted suicide, a larger portion decides that no lynch is the best option.

Implies that the vote was not even close. This could only possibly be consistent with the role I posted.

I just proved my alignment as well as anyone possibly could, if you don't claim to me then at the same level of paranoia you will never claim to anyone, and the village will lose.

[LightWolf]

You sure react seriously to a post where I state that in 99% of the cases you are clean, and most of the ways you could be scum are simply ridiculous.

But you sure are wrong about a few things:

1. The mafia wouldn't need 5 votes to accomplish this feat. If Bri voting was a calculated plan, mafia would only require two of the following: day persuade, mayor, secret vote, negative vote. I'm not saying any of these happened, just proving they don't need 5 votes :)

2. The lynch flavour in no way indicated overhelming majority, only majority. 10 is larger than 4 but 5 is also larger than 4. The way the flavour is worded doesn't make it clear what it is compared to: A larger portion of all players or a portion larger than the suicide helpers.

3. Dying is the cleanest one can get this early in the game, not saying that's what you should do.

The above are NOT saying you shouldn't be trusted, but don't use your latest reasonings why you are clean because they are far from as solid as the voting plan.

What I do imply is that Bri should be looked into whether you are clean or not US, because Bri's vote did indeed p much create most possible ways you could be scum. Also if I die it was US.

[UncleSam]

I take it seriously because you mean it seriously don't give me that shit.

Secondly the notion of the mafia having two secret day persuaders, mayors, hidden secret voters, or negative voters in a game this small is absolutely ridiculous. You may as well plant your head in the ground and say "LALALA THE VILLAGE DOESN'T HAVE AN INSPECTOR I'M NOT CLAIMING" when the village inspector steps up Day 1 and lynches a mafia inspect result. The only difference is that there is a chance a claimed inspector is a mafia inspector, whereas it makes no sense for a mafia to have as many votes as I have demonstrated I have.

So ya I know you are always playfully paranoid and what not but there are times when the answer is so painfully obvious it's just really annoying.

[LightWolf]

Originally Posted by Fat UncleSam

I take it seriously because you mean it seriously don't give me that shit.

In the very post I pointed out I was logically incorrect and that in 99% of the cases you were clean.

Secondly the notion of the mafia having two secret day persuaders, mayors, hidden secret voters, or negative voters in a game this small is absolutely ridiculous.

Do I have to quote myself?
"I'm not saying any of these happened, just proving they don't need 5 votes :)"

You are getting overly defensive here man, I said it a multiple times in a way or two that you are 99% clean, and it can't get much better than that(because at 100% clear you'd have to be dead). So what exactly are you defending against? If you believe I was serious in my first then you are more paranoid than I am.

[UncleSam]

I'm not trying to convince you I'm trying to point out to other people (aka mafia who haven't created fakes) that they can't hide behind this to refuse to claim.

[billymills]

As the morning sun shines, a sigh of relief passes through the crowd. Its a dark shadow covering the town had suddenly been lifted. And left to die in the town square. From numerous caterpillar tracks and ditches all around the city, you infer that the american military had suddenly invaded in the middle of the night, but left before dawn.

There was but one casualty.

Originally Posted by Fat billymills

Dear shade,

You are an Elite Girl Scout, seller of cookies.

You have the unique ability to sell extremely unhealthy cookies to millions of extremely unhealthy Americans every year, and are fully willing to profit from their gluttony. With the cookie-selling badge, you are also extremely inconspicuous: while the tenants are buying cookies, you are able to search the premises without attracting any suspicion.

Every night, you may PM billymills with “Night x - Selling cookies to USER.” While USER is distracted buying and eating cookies, you will be able to search his home, determining exactly who he is.

You win if the Ordinary Comrades win.

While you are all mourning the loss of this extremely crucial person, your sorrow is drowned out by the incessant bickering between Eagle4 and More Cowbell. It seems they are locked in a heated debate about the origin of life and other shit no one cares about.

As someone quietly mentions they don't believe any of this religious stuff, Eagle4 launches into a tirade about God's supposed accomplishments:
"Have you guys ever heard about the tides? They go in and out without anyone pulling them. Who did that? God. Ever seen a tornado? Who do you think has the ability to tie up wind like that? God. Ever wonder why a tornado hasn't killed you yet? God is constantly watching over you. So long as you pray, a tornado won't ever harm you. It's worked for me so far. And then look at all the miracles we see every day. Electricity? God did it. Magnets? God. Gravity? You'd better believe God did it. Even then look at the real complicated stuff, the human eye, calculus, quantum mechanics. You don't think that stuff came around by chance do you? If God didn't make them, who did? QED."

Even More Cowbell is somewhat bewildered as Eagle4 won't stop talking, when finally, out of the blue, Princess Bri stops him with a sharp uppercut to the chin. A true miracle.

In the temporary reprieve, you notice a commercial for Kent Brockman's nightly news:

Originally Posted by Fat Kent Brockman

Later on at eleven, our special investigative report on how to prove your role!

And in other news, you find that little gk has been replaced by FireMage.

You have until 12PM EST Saturday January 19th to send to lynch someone.

[shade]

cunts

[UncleSam]

Sigh...

Everyone forward your night results to me and I'll post a lynch target. shade unfortunately was busy with exams and never claimed to me, or I'd have gotten him protection...

On an unrelated note I'm glad to see that billymills has become a true believer!