CAP 2 - Part 14 - Pokedex Entry Submissions

[Rising_Dusk]

This is a fully flavor part of the CAP, and among the very last things we'll do for CAP 2 before final product and playtest. The rules here are very loose, but they exist, and so please keep them in mind. Note that unlike CAP 1 where users submitted the height, weight, and dex entries, here you will be just working on your dex entries. I will do the height and weight personally, like older CAPs, for final product.

• Pokedex entries are 1-3 short, simple sentences.
• Pokedex entries must be submitted as a final submission to be considered in the poll. Make it clear so that I know that it is your final submission.
• Provide a Pokedex entry for both Pokemon White and Pokemon Black. This means that you need to submit two Pokedex entries, not just one. Usually, they complement the other's ideas, but address different sides of the same coin. Check some in-game BW Pokemon for examples.
• You may ask for advice, but bumping of any kind is not allowed. If people don't comment on your Pokedex entry, let the silence be your advice. You can revise it and repost it, but please don't ask for help in the thread.
• Keep entries in good taste. If it happens on Animal Planet or in National Geographic it's fair game, but gratuitously violent or excessively disgusting entries will be warned and deleted.
• Substantiate your posts. Your post will be warned and deleted if you post something like "X entry is cool!". You need some reasoning behind it, such as why it sounds good. We aren't looking for a critical analysis, just a sentence or two.
• One submission per user.

This will be open for roughly 48 hours, possibly shorter if I think it's not going very well, possibly more if it's really exciting and fun for everyone.

CAP 2 thus far:

Name: Necturna

Originally Posted by Fat Korski

Concept: Sketch Artist

Description: A Pokemon that learns Sketch, once, and everything that goes along with that.

Justification:

In terms of uniqueness, I think that few existing Pokemon can match DPP Smeargle, an otherwise laughably worthless Pokemon trolling OU with access to every trick in the book (or at least 4 of them) but also affecting the metagame greatly by becoming a top threat in the lead metagame. This Pokemon will borrow some of that uniqueness by learning the move Sketch and thus having access to ONE surprise/strategic/gutshot bonus move to supplement its pre-existing movepool. Being otherwise competently built (read: usable stats), this Poke could be a top threat or specialist for reasons we can't even predict yet.

Questions To Be Answered:

• How will a Poke that has access to any one move out of all the moves in the game affect common battling tactics, namely prediction, scouting, and switching?
• Which Sketch moves will become most common on this Poke's best sets? Does Sketchmon's success rely on hiding that secret Sketch move until just the right moment or can it succeed with predictably powerful moves like Spore, Spikes, Hurricane, Shell Smash, etc.?
• Does this unique and powerful access to moves need to be counterbalanced elsewhere in the Pokemon's design? If so, then to what degree?
• What kind of impact can Sketchmon have on teambuilding in terms of being able to patch holes with common utility moves like Rapid Spin or Toxic Spikes?

Explanation: The key here is that we have a lot of freedom to construct a unique Pokemon while staying within the confines of the concept. Typing, stats, abilities, and even most of the movepool are completely fair game so long as the Poke learns Sketch only once along the way and that we keep that in mind during previous steps. Now, this doesn't mean the CAP process will be directionless; Rising Dusk is pretty well organized and good at keeping discussions focused, and the concept itself has firm grounding in Smeargle's precedent. What's really being studied with this concept is movepool diversity and effectiveness, so it should have the most effect on the movepool process, where movepool creators will have to carefully balance their Sketchmon's actual movepool with the possibility of adding any one other move to the list. In terms of the metagame, there is no doubt in my mind that throwing a wildcard like this into the mix will strongly affect the metagame.

Focus: Bulky Offense
Typing: Grass / Ghost
Stats: 64 HP / 120 Atk / 100 Def / 85 SpA / 120 SpD / 81 Spe
Abilities: Forewarn / Telepathy (DW)
Movepool:
Primary Checks: Heatran, Jirachi, Skarmory, Hydreigon
Gender: Female

tl;dr: Quack! (!!!!!!)

[milo v3]

Necturna
Fiend Plant Pokemon
White Entry: A prowler of the night, she can see in even the darkest of the conditions because of her six eyes. With these eyes she can even see people's souls.
Black Entry: They're formed from long dead plants controlled by a malevolent spirit. This spirit needs to eat flesh to reach the souls of those it kills, so it fights with its mouthed arms.

I made her a demonic plant feeds on flesh and souls because she was a based off a carnivorous plant so I thought she needed to seem more of a scary and creepy pokemon. Also several of its moves are based off biting so I made sure I mentioned her pitcher plant arms. Even though it might seem like this would fit a ghost type better I think it still suits as she isn't the spirit she is manipulated by it. (Similar to The Darkness)

[Rising_Dusk]

Yeah, that is really long for a dex entry. Please consult the in-game dex entries for a good guide on length. 3 sentences is a 'limit', but even 3 sentences is too long if the sentences aren't very, very simple.

[milo v3]

I've severely shortened it. Now its about as long as Mew's sapphire entry.

Sure, I'll give this a shot. =)

Necturna: "Though feared by most for her ghastly appearance, Necturna is actually quite affectionate. She is sought by many for her spiritual connection to fallen Pokemon."

I tried to make it short, but I'm wondering if it's still too long. I'm really just trying to get as much of her essential story in there as possible. She's scary, she's obsessive, she channels the spirits of the dead... That pretty much covers it. It's much more Ghost-evocative than Grass-evocative, but then so were the parts of her story that we really focused on and made relevant.

EDIT: Alternatively, to cut it down even shorter, about the length of more typical BW entries, I could collapse the first sentence.

Necturna: "Ghastly but affectionate, she is sought by many for her spiritual connection to fallen Pokemon."

[Engineer Pikachu]

Something quick that I whipped up.

"Through the eyes on its skirt, Necturna can communicate with and channel the spirits of the deceased."

Final Submission:

Necturna: The Thorn Spirit Pokemon

Black: Using the eyes on its skirt-like body, it communicates with and channels the spirits of the deceased.
White: It is very protective, using its vines to ward off potential danger. It will guard only one person during its entire lifetime.

[Metal Bagon]

Here's 4 ideas from me. I'd like some constructive criticism so I can choose which two to submit.

"Necturna can open up open up her skirt by the teeth. When she does this the restless spirits of this world are sucked into the afterlife."

"Necturna commonly resides inside dead plant life, and can take control of these plants to scare away travelers."

"As a defensive precaution, the eyes on Necturna's skirt can suck the life force from people who threaten it. This life force can later be used to revive dead plant life."

"The vine on Necturna's head is actually the only living organism, and the rest of the body is created from dead plant life sung together."

"The vine on Necturna's head is considered to be worth millions. However, all Necturna will pass away without it and stealing it considered to be a crime against nature.

Anyway, I can't choose so hopefully you guys can.

[AJC]

here a shot.

White
Found mostly in remote eastern mountainous areas, this Pokemon along with Froslass are considered the basis for the Yuki-Onna legend in those areas, defends itself with whip like vines that come out of it's lower true body.

Black
This Pokemon while having a fierce looking bottom it is actually quite gentle, the upper part of this pokemon's body is a false face to redirect attacks to a part of the body it can live without.

[Aerodactyl Legend]

Originally Posted by Fat Metal Bagon

"Necturna commonly resides inside dead plant life, and can take control of these plants to scare away travelers."

This one. Simple, uncomplicated, and still taps into the darker tone.

I don't like the reference of a skirt honestly. Makes it too human.

[FlareBlitz]

Necturna
Thorn Phantom Pokemon.

White: "It has a symbiotic relationship with otherworldly spirits. They aid it while hunting, in exchange for fresh life energy from its victims."
Black: "This Pokemon makes its home in desolate forests. Campers who treat its habitat disrespectfully are not seen again."

Flavor notes: I went with "it" as a pronoun instead of "she" because that's how the Dex treats similar female-only Pokemon (see Jynx).

I went with much darker flavor than most other entries, befitting the generally darker flavor entries for ghosts in B/W (Chandelure, Jellicent, Yamask). I also did not want to make this Pokemon "special", or call attention to Sketch in any way (it's an egg move and that would make no sense). I also did not entirely go with the original artist's intent regarding this Pokemon being a "spirit maiden" - I felt that it would be much better suited as a forest dwelling, borderline-malicious spirit. I did, however, make reference to its ability to commune with spirits, as I wanted to put some flavor backing behind its abilities.

Any constructive criticism is welcome!

[remetagross]

Necturna, Dusk Pokemon
White: They are often seen wandering nearby damaged forests after an inferno. They are said to embody the nature's mourn.
Black: A Necturna was once seen draining life from a young willow until it dried up to make a dead bramble flourish again.

[the dead mans oddysey]

Necturna the spectral artist Pokemon (it's a sketch poke)

Black entry: necturna roams around drawing what it sees on the trees in the forests they exist in. They use these drawings to communicate.

White entry: it is said that when something looks into the eyes of the plant on necturna's head, necturna can mimic the person or pokemon who looked at them perfectly.

Because this is a sketch poke, I thought that the dex entry should be based around sketch, rather than its typing. I'm still trying to keep a mildly ghost-like feel to them though (please read white dex entry)

[LeviLamprey]

Necturna, the Vine Miko Pokemon

Black: Able to channel the spirits of deceased Pokemon and plants, Necturna offers her services to passersby-for a price.

White: Necturna cares affectionately for all organisms, both living and dead. Those who defile her forest residence would do well to beware.

Uhm...yeah. This just sucks. It's abysmal. But whatever~

[Deck Knight]

Final Submission:

Necturna
The Nightshade Pokemon

White: At night Necturna deceives men with its appearance and feeds on their life energy. It remembers each spirit's taste distinctly.

Black: During the day Necturna burrows underground to disguise itself as a flower. The scent of the petals will make a person delirious.

Entries are a bit longer than Chandelure's, but the soul stealing thing is pretty common these days. I chose "Nightshade" because it's fairly clever (yes, I know my movepool doesn't have Night Shade), being a flowering plant used in poisons. (It's commonly referred to as "deadly nightshade". If you need more morbidity, just read the wikipedia entry!) Basically the subtext is Necturna can channel the abilities of the life energy it devours via Sketch, but it's difficult to be so explicit and quite clunky.

[GRs Cousin]

Necturna
The Floral Medium Pokemon
White: Necturna have the unique ability to channel the dead. Though heretic in nature, Necturna often look for living companionship.
Black: Their feminine appearance and deceitful nature aides Necturna in their carnivorous male-eating habits. They have difficulty finding a mate due to this.

Also, I'd just like to point out that I think this is turning into the name thread again. I'll give some critique within this post later. Critique from others would be appreciated as well.

[ikasu]

I've thought of three:

Despite its deceiving looks, Necturna has the ability to help lost souls enter the afterlife.

Necturna is known as a channel to the afterlife, living near Celestial Tower to help Pokemon Trainers mourn the lives of their diseased Pokemon.

Necturna is very in sync with nature, which is why some say she is able to communicate directly with Pokemon who have passed away.

I really like the last two, which shows her grass typing is as important as her ghost typing. I didn't want to make Necturna an evil ghost type like most of the ones in Black and White so I went with communicating with diseased Pokemon to help Trainers grieve. I imagine to do this Necturna basically channels (like in the supporting art, but with a Pokemon, not a move) the image of the actual Pokemon that died. I'm not sure about the first one though, I thought of it then thought of the other two. If I get any critism I'll see if I can make it sound better then come up with a classification.

[Kaprikorn]

I have a couple. Feedback is much appreciated.

The eyes on its vine open only when it has bonded with another Pokemon. It is fiercely protective of its new friend.

Necturna is very motherly towards its friends. Its many fangs serve as antennae to channel their spirits.

[Genox]

Necturna
The Guardian Spirit Pokemon:

Both Versions: Some say that Necturna are the spirits of decease Gardevoir who have returned to watch over their former trainers.

I'd like some feedback. Anything that can be improved? What do you think about the description?

[Mos-Quitoxe]

Final Submission:

Necturna
Channeler Pokemon

black: Since it lacks photosynthetic pigments, it relies entirely on preying upon living things for nutrition.

white: Its mind is linked to the afterlife. As a result, some Necturna seem capable of calling spirits to their aid.

Just throwing in my two cents.

[capefeather]

Species: Wandering Pokémon

Black: It forms its flowers into a human shape to draw Pokémon and trainers alike away from danger. It uses its many eyes to scope out its surroundings.

White: They are said to guide Pokémon spirits to the afterlife. They manipulate their shadows to protect themselves from Lampent.

I, for one, would prefer not to make Necturna a bitch. Seriously, we've managed to avoid this in several of these process steps now. Let's not ruin it with such a blah characterization! :D

Oh right I should explain this a bit O.o I intended for the two dex entries to contradict each other somewhat. Black sees the "dress" and vine and concludes that it is a plant masquerading as a shrine maiden... person or other (the plant is the "real essence" of Necturna). White sees the "ghost within" and concludes that it is a spirit wearing plant matter (the ghost is the "real essence" of Necturna). I think it makes sense, anyway ^_^ I also reference other Pokémon that "rival" her role because I like doing that for some reason. White in particular is closely related to an idea I have bumping around in case Necturna gets one or two pre-evolutions. I also think that Black sort of plays out as an Absol-style entry, where Necturna looks like a malicious flytrap bitch but is actually trying to help her "victims" (or maybe fight them to train??).

Originally Posted by Fat capefeather

I think that Necturna's "role" (I know the design explanation isn't set in stone, but still) comes in direct conflict with the Litwick line (and the Frillish line, but those guys are underwater, which is kind of a problem). I also think that it could be argued that the Foongus line comes in conflict with Necturna as well. However, I do think the Foongus reference may be rather excessive. I was kind of thinking that maybe Necturna would be disguised as trainers who want to battle you...

P.S.: HAHA DRAW GET IT

[Son_of_Shadoo]

Off the top of my head.

Species: Spirit Lure Pokémon.
Black Dex: It has been used by mediums for hundreds of years to lure the spirits of the dead to séances.
White Dex: Its sweet aroma is said to be able to reach the afterlife and the wandering spirits within.

I'm not sure if I like the reference to séances, but it seems fitting to me. Thoughts appreciated.

[AOPSUser]

Necturna: Spiritual artist

Black: It is the spirit of a deceased artist, said to be perpetually sketching other spirits.

White: After its passing away, it has fed on the souls of others.

[srk1214]

Final Submission

Necturna: The Flycatcher Pokemon
Black: It is believed that Necturna's favorite prey is Sawk. However, no one has ever seen Necturna hunt.
White: Throh sometimes go missing after wandering alone at night in a forest inhabited by Necturna.

-Shares species name with Weepinbell and Victreebel, something GF often does (even in Gen 5.) For example, Maractus and Cacnea share Cactus Pokemon

-Suggests that the female-only Ghost preys on the two male-only Fighting-types that would quite literally be unable to harm Necturna, since they both learn only Normal and Fighting-type attacks.

[MikaDo]

Necturna

The dead plant pokémon

Black: If it sees a creative pokemon, it will absorb it's creativity. It's population harshly fell after their ability was recognized.

White: While Necturna gets older, the teeth on its dress will grow longer. It uses them to absord one's creativity.

FEEDBACK!

[Danmire]

Final Submission
Necturna

Mourning Flower Pokemon

Black: When it burrows underground, the root attached to it closes it's eyes and stands upright, giving a lavender scent to attract prey.

White: The mourning and crying of this Pokemon gives off a foreboding feel to anyone in it's forest. Some say it is a deceased forest guardian from ancient times.