Completed Alchemator vs Darkslay in Strong Badia (Objection refs with boxing gloves on)

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#1
Man, it's been too long since I last checked an email. Let's see what the ol' Compé's got for us.

Dear Strong Bad

Do you like pokemon if you do what ones your favorite?

Crapfully SINCERELY yours
Jim
Well Tim, no-one knows more about being poked than ... wait, do you mean Pokeymon? That crappy kids' game for kids? Keep that stuff away from me and ... not away from ... Strong Sad?

All right, I admit it. I once had to do some 'reffing' for a couple of guys who wanted their own pokeymon battle. And let me tell you, biggest waste of not tricking Homestar into selling me all his stuff ever!

Open Challenge
2v2 Singles
2 Day DQ
0 Recoveries / 5 Chills
Only one-stage Pokémon may be used.
Only send two Pokémon to the ref. The first of these will be sent out automatically.

The question is, which two of my four one-stage mons will it be? ;D
I'll take this, using non-evolving Pokemon. It is a training battle:

[13:55:14] <%Alchemator> post saying it's a training battle
[13:55:16] <%Alchemator> that is, quote me saying it

No Items
Switch = KO
All Abilities
Arena: Strong Badia



A 20ft-by-30ft field with a white picket fence along the edges. There is also a tyre leaning on the fence and a stop sign with graffiti on it leaning on a cinder block. There is no external water source for moves like Surf, Muddy Water and Soak. Apart from that, everything else can be used.


Team Alchemator


Sableye [Quentin] (M)
Nature:
Brave (Adds one (1) Rank to Attack,Divides Base Speed by 1.15 and gives a flat 10 point decrease in evasion, effectively adding 10 accuracy (e.g. 85 becomes 95) to opponent's attacks directed at this Pokemon.)

Type:

[Dark]: Dark STAB; Immunity to all telepathic and telekinetic attacks, better performance in all darkened and especially twilight conditions. Can use any Dark-type attack regardless of Attraction.
[Ghost]:Ghost STAB; brief intangibility that nullifies Normal and Fighting-type attacks. Can move through walls for a brief period of time but must remain in motion. Superior senses in low light and inside dark buildings. Have no vision reduction in hazes.

Stats:


HP: 90

Atk: Rank 4 (+)
Def: Rank 3
SpA: Rank 3
SpD: Rank 3
Spe: 45 (50/1.15v)

EC:
N/A
MC:
0
DC:
0/5

Abilities:

Keen Eye:
(Innate) This Pokemon has extremely good vision and cannot have its accuracy lowered by an opponent through any means (including accuracy lowering attacks, Smogs, Hazes, Fog, etc.). Its attacks are still affected by an opponent’s evasion and the Pokemon's own accuracy.
Stall:
(Innate) This Pokemon has a watchful eye and immense patience. It can be ordered to attack last on any action regardless of ordinary attack priority. If an opponent orders their Pokemon to attack after Sableye, that attack will fail. Against another Sableye, the trainer who issues attacks first has precedence and the opponent's attack will fail.
Prankster (DW):
(Innate) The Pokemon is always prepared for engaging in sneaky tactics and trickery, giving its non-damaging attacks an increase in priority level.

Attacks:

Leer
Scratch
Foresight
Night Shade
Astonish
Fury Swipes
Fake Out
Detect
Shadow Sneak
Metal Burst
Recover
Sucker Punch
Taunt
Brick Break
Shadow Claw


Druddigon [Dave] (M)
Nature: Quiet (Adds a Rank to Special Attack, Divides Base Speed by 1.15 and gives a flat 10 point decrease in evasion, effectively adding 10 accuracy (e.g. 85 becomes 95) to opponent's attacks directed at this Pokemon.)

Type:
Dragon: Dragon STAB; More in touch with legendary or special auras in arenas. Able to use Hyper Beam and Giga Impact without losing focus.

Stats:

HP: 100
Atk: Rank 5
Def: Rank 3
SpA: Rank 3 (+)
SpD: Rank 3
Spe: 41 (48/1.15v)

EC: N/A
MC: 0
DC: 0/5

Abilities:
Rough Skin: (Innate) When struck with a contact attack, this Pokemon’s abrasive skin causes pain to the opponent, dealing 25% of the damage received to the opponent.
Sheer Force: (Can be Enabled) This Pokemon can energize all its attacks with secondary effect chances less than 100%. When Enabled, the Base Attack Power of every move with an effect chance less than 100% increases by two (2), but they will never have a secondary effect.
Mold Breaker (DW): (Innate) Whenever this Pokemon attacks, it emits an invisible, blindingly quick pulse preceding the attack that disables the opponents natural abilities (e.g. Levitators plummet towards the ground before Earthquake hits, Volt Absorb will not absorb electric attacks, Clear Body does not prevent stat-drops, etc.)

Attacks:
Leer
Scratch
Hone Claws
Bite
Scary Face
Dragon Rage
Slash
Crunch
Snatch
Sucker Punch
Thunder Fang
Flamethrower
Focus Blast
Rock Slide
Dragon Claw


Team DarkSlay


Absol [Midnight] (M)
Nature: Mild (Adds * to Special Attack. Subtracts * from Defense.)

Type: Dark
Dark: Dark STAB; Immunity to all telepathic and telekinetic attacks, better performance in all darkened and especially twilight conditions. Can use any Dark-type attack regardless of Attraction.

Stats:
HP: 100
Atk: Rank 5
Def: Rank 1 (-)
SpA: Rank 4 (+)
SpD: Rank 2
Spe: 75

EC: 0 / 0
MC: 0
DC: 5 / 5

Abilities:
Pressure: (Innate) This Pokemon’s presence fills the air with intense anxiety, and any damaging or status attack launched at this Pokemon costs the opposing Pokemon two (2) more energy to perform.
Super Luck: (Innate) This Pokemon’s natural skill doubles (x2) its critical hit levels above other Pokemon, making its normal moves inflict critical hits 12.5% of the time and its high critical hit moves inflict critical hits 1/3rd of the time.
Justified (UNLOCKED): (Innate) This Pokemon's body reacts to dark energy, invigorating its passions. When hit by a Dark-type move, the Pokemon's attack will increase one (1) stage. A boost gained this way will be maintained at the end of each round.

Attacks:
Scratch (*)
Feint (*)
Leer (*)
Taunt (*)
Quick Attack (*)
Razor Wind (*)
Bite (*)
Pursuit (*)
Swords Dance (*)
Night Slash
Perish Song
Double Team
Sucker Punch
Detect
Psycho Cut

Zen Headbutt (*)
Megahorn (*)
Magic Coat (*)

Counter
Bounce

Fire Blast (*)
Stone Edge (*)
Thunderbolt (*)
Ice Beam
Thunder Wave
Snarl
Claw Sharpen
Torment


Revenankh [Ankhles] (F)
Nature: Relaxed (Adds * to Defense. Subtracts 15% from Speed.)

Type: Ghost/Fighting
Ghost: Ghost STAB; brief intangibility that nullifies Normal and Fighting-type attacks, Psychic, Sucker Punch, Telekinesis, Trick, and Will-o-Wisp have Energy Cost reduced by one (1). (Gengar line and pure Ghosts only: moving through walls.)
Fighting: Fighting STAB; ignore weight restrictions of throwing/grappling moves, Meditate has Energy Cost reduced by one (1).

Stats:
HP: 100
Atk: Rank 4
Def: Rank 4 (+)
SpA: Rank 3
SpD: Rank 4
Spe: 56 (-)

EC: 0 / 0 (Does not evolve)
MC: 0
DC: 5 / 5

Abilities:
Shed Skin: (Innate) This Pokemon regularly sheds its skin and any impurities contained in its body. If afflicted with a status condition, this Pokemon has a 33% chance of removing all status conditions at the end of a round.
Air Lock: (Innate) This Pokemon releases immense barometric pressure, clearing the weather in the arena and preventing the effect of weather moves and abilities from taking place.
Mummy (UNLOCKED): (Innate) This Pokemon's skin has a lasting curse on it. When struck by an opponents contact move, the curse transfers, changing the opponent's ability(ies) to Mummy for the next six (6) actions.

Attacks:
Wrap (*)
Bide (*)
Sand Tomb (*)
Wring Out (*)
Rock Tomb (*)
Arm Thrust (*)
Mean Look (*)
Glare (*)
Shadow Punch (*)
Hammer Arm
Power Whip
Revenge
Moonlight

Shadow Sneak (*)
Counter (*)
Drain Punch (*)
Mach Punch

Ice Punch

Rock Slide (*)
Bulk Up (*)
Taunt (*)
Protect


This better be worth it. OK Geekinator, show me something awesome.

*Alchemator sends out Sableye*

What is that, some kinda black imp? Dorkslay, please slay this dork.

*DarkSlay sends out Absol*

That's mildly better ... I guess. So ... Dorkslay 'gives orders' ... well, that's what it said on the sheet.
 

DarkSlay

Guess who's back? Na na na! *breakdances*
is a CAP Contributor Alumnus
#2
All right, let's get this show started! Go, Midnight the Absol!

No Prankster on this Sableye means good news for us! Let's see if we can go out on the offensive this round.

Double Team (3 Clones) -> Swords Dance -> Night Slash

IF (
Sableye uses Taunt) AND (Sableye is not Taunted), then (Use Magic Coat, and shift down your actions)
 

Alchemator

my god if you don't have an iced tea for me when i
is a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
#3
Not having Prankster as an ability doesn't mean that it can't be one!

Foresight ~ Brick Break ~ Fake Out

Pressure will be annoying I suspect.
 
#4

Quentin (M)
HP: 90 | EN: 100 | Speed: 45 (-)
Stats: 4/3/3/3
Abilities: Keen Eye, Stall
Other: None


Midnight (M)
HP: 100 | EN: 100 | Speed: 75
Stats: 5/1/4/2
Abilities: Pressure, Super Luck, Justified
Other: None

Man, this is going to be more boring than Homestar's story about how he and Marzipan first met. I can't even understand a damn thing those two creatures are saying! Wait, I know who can help me out here. The Cheat!

*The Cheat rushes in*

These two nerds want one of them pokeymon battles and I figure you'd know what the pokeymons were saying. Let's start with the white-haired doggymajig.

*The Cheat noises*

Double Team? What the crap's that supposed to ... oh. Man, I cannot tell which white-haired doggymajig is the real one. I should try that technique some time. Could freak out a certain baby brother. What about Impy over here? What's he up to?

*The Cheat noises*

Foresight, eh? Well let's see what that ... aw, I was gonna guess the one on the far right. But it looks like ol' Doggy's little magic trick ain't foolin' nobody. But now it's dancing. Why's it dancing The Cheat?

*The Cheat noises*

Ooh, Swords Dance. Sounds like my kind of dance. Oh, finally we're getting some action here! Look at that imp go! He's breaking the doggy like a brick! A Brick Break! And it's even trying to Fake him Out some more! And what does doggy do? Nothing! Such a wimp.


Quentin (M)
HP: 90 | EN: 78 | Speed: 45 (-)
Stats: 4/3/3/3
Abilities: Keen Eye, Stall
Other: None


Midnight (M)
HP: 73 | EN: 81 | Speed: 75
Stats: 5/1/4/2
Abilities: Pressure, Super Luck, Justified
Other: Foresight (3 more actions), +2 attack (1 more round), faked out

Midnight uses Double Team for 12 energy
Midnight creates 3 clones

Quentin uses Foresight for 6 energy
Pressure increases the energy cost by 2
Quentin can see through Midnight's illusions for 6 actions

Midnight's Foresight counter drops to 5

Midnight uses Swords Dance for 7 energy
Midnight's attack is raised by 2 stages

Quentin uses Brick Break for 6 energy
Pressure increases the energy cost by 2
Hits the real Midnight due to Foresight
Roll a D16 for crit: 8 - no crit
Midnight takes (8+(4-1)*1.5)*1.5=18.75 damage
Midnight's clones disappear

Midnight's Foresight counter drops to 4

Quentin uses Fake Out for 4 energy
Pressure increases the energy cost by 2
Roll a D16 for crit: 2 - no crit
Midnight takes (4+(4-1)*1.5)=8.5 damage

Midnight flinches

Midnight's Foresight counter drops to 3

Total damage:
Quentin: 0
Midnight: 27.25
 

Alchemator

my god if you don't have an iced tea for me when i
is a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
#5
Brick Break ~ Brick Break ~ Brick Break

If he uses Torment, Detect against it the first time and replace all remaining actions with Night Shade.
 

DarkSlay

Guess who's back? Na na na! *breakdances*
is a CAP Contributor Alumnus
#6
Hm...we might get hit for a good chunk of damage, but at least this prevents three Brick Breaks in a row.

Taunt -> Torment -> Night Slash
 
#7

Quentin (M)
HP: 90 | EN: 78 | Speed: 45 (-)
Stats: 4/3/3/3
Abilities: Keen Eye, Stall
Other: None


Midnight (M)
HP: 73 | EN: 81 | Speed: 75
Stats: 5/1/4/2
Abilities: Pressure, Super Luck, Justified
Other: Foresight (3 more actions), +2 attack (1 more round), faked out

Ooh, I like what doggy's doing now. Taunting that little imp like that. Making him angry. Oh, he's going in for another one of them Brick Breaks! Wham! Come on doggy, why aren't you fighting back? You just keep Tormenting him. And how did impy fall for that?

*The Cheat noises*

Too angry to see it coming, eh The Cheat? Whoa, was that some kind of slashy move doggy just did? Ooh, he's dark like the night and he's a slashy creature.

*The Cheat noises*

And that's called Night Slash? I wonder how long it took them to think that one up. And that thing impy's doing now is Night Shade, huh? Looks more like a dark laser. Like if Blue Laser went dark.


Quentin (M)
HP: 73 | EN: 55 | Speed: 45 (-)
Stats: 4/3/3/3
Abilities: Keen Eye, Stall
Other: Taunt (3 more actions), Torment (can't use Brick Break or Night Shade this round, 4 more actions)


Midnight (M)
HP: 44 | EN: 59 | Speed: 75
Stats: 5/1/4/2
Abilities: Pressure, Super Luck, Justified
Other: +1 attack (1 more round), faked out

Midnight uses Taunt for 9 energy
Quentin is taunted for 6 actions

Quentin uses Brick Break for 6 energy
Pressure increases the energy cost by 2
Roll a D16 for crit: 4 - no crit
Midnight takes (8+(4-1)*1.5)*1.5=18.75 damage

Midnight's Foresight counter drops to 2
Quentin's Taunt counter drops to 5

Quentin uses Detect for 7 energy
The move fails due to Taunt

Midnight uses Torment for 9 energy
Quentin is subject to Torment for 6 actions

Midnight's Foresight counter drops to 1
Quentin's Taunt counter drops to 4
Quentin's Torment counter drops to 5

Midnight uses Night Slash for 4 energy
Roll a D16 for crit (boosted to 4/16): 6 - no crit
Quentin takes (7+3+(5-3)*1.5)+(2-0)*1.75=16.5 damage

Quentin uses Night Shade for 6 energy
Pressure increases the energy cost by 2
Midnight takes 10 damage

Midnight's Foresight counter drops to 0
Quentin's Taunt counter drops to 3
Quentin's Torment counter drops to 4

Total damage:
Quentin: 16.5
Midnight: 56
 

DarkSlay

Guess who's back? Na na na! *breakdances*
is a CAP Contributor Alumnus
#8
And NOW it's time to see if we can cause some heavy damage. Let's also make sure this thing doesn't use Metal Burst to screw us over either.

Sucker Punch -> Night Slash -> Double Team (3 Clones)

IF (
Sableye uses Metal Burst on Actions 1 and/or 2), THEN (Replace the current action with Thunder Wave for the first Metal Burst, and the second Metal Burst, just chill)
 

Alchemator

my god if you don't have an iced tea for me when i
is a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
#9
This is why I attempted to take an early lead.

Chill ~ Fury Swipes ~ Fury Swipes

Rawr, FURY SWIPES
 
#10

Quentin (M)
HP: 73 | EN: 55 | Speed: 45 (-)
Stats: 4/3/3/3
Abilities: Keen Eye, Stall
Other: Taunt (3 more actions), Torment (can't use Brick Break or Night Shade this round, 4 more actions)


Midnight (M)
HP: 44 | EN: 59 | Speed: 75
Stats: 5/1/4/2
Abilities: Pressure, Super Luck, Justified
Other: +1 attack (1 more round), faked out

Doggy's looking a little tired, eh The Cheat? But what's Impy doing? BWA HA HA HA! What kind of attack was that? It's like "Oh man, I don't wanna fight, I'll just pretend to fight and see if my master notices that I don't wanna fight." HA! And doggy comes in and he's like "SUCKER PUNCH'd!" And he's following it up with another one of those Night Slashes, eh? Ooh, now Impy's doing something cool. Whoa. Um ... I gotta go ... place that's not where Impy's Swipes of Fury are.

Oh, it's over. And the doggy just did another one of his Double Team thingies. What? Another fumble by impy? What the crap? Aw, man! This is almost worse than Coach Z freestyling!


Quentin (M)
HP: 43 | EN: 38 | Speed: 45 (-)
Stats: 4/3/3/3
Abilities: Keen Eye, Stall
Other: Torment (can't use Fury Swipes this round, 1 more action)


Midnight (M)
HP: 30 | EN: 38 | Speed: 75
Stats: 5/1/4/2
Abilities: Pressure, Super Luck, Justified
Other: Faked out, Double Team (3 clones)

Midnight uses Sucker Punch for 5 energy
Roll a D16 for crit (boosted to 2/16): 9 - no crit
Quentin takes (8+3+(5-3)*1.5)+(1-0)*1.75=15.75 damage

Quentin can't chill due to Taunt and wastes 3 energy on some pansy-ass attack that misses completely

Quentin's Taunt counter drops to 2
Quentin's Torment counter drops to 3

Midnight uses Night Slash for 4 energy
Roll a D16 for crit (boosted to 4/16): 15 - no crit
Quentin takes (7+3+(5-3)*1.5)+(1-0)*1.75=14.75 damage

Quentin uses Fury Swipes for 4 energy
Pressure increases the energy cost by 2
Roll a D100 for accuracy: 17 - hit
Roll a D8 for hits (1-3 = 2, 4-6 = 3, 7 = 4, 8 = 5): 7 - 4 hits
Roll 4D16 for crits: 1, 10, 10, 15 - one crit
Midnight takes (2*4+1+(4-1)*1.5)=13.5 damage

Quentin's Taunt counter drops to 1
Quentin's Torment counter drops to 2

Midnight uses Double Team for 12 energy
Midnight creates 3 clones

Quentin uses Fury Swipes for 8 energy
The move fails due to Torment

Quentin's Taunt counter drops to 0
Quentin's Torment counter drops to 1

Total damage:
Quentin: 47
Midnight: 69.5
 
#13

Quentin (M)
HP: 43 | EN: 38 | Speed: 45 (-)
Stats: 4/3/3/3
Abilities: Keen Eye, Stall
Other: Torment (can't use Fury Swipes this round, 1 more action)


Midnight (M)
HP: 30 | EN: 38 | Speed: 75
Stats: 5/1/4/2
Abilities: Pressure, Super Luck, Justified
Other: Faked out, Double Team (3 clones)

And the doggy goes all Night Slashy again but impy just stands there. Oh, he's doing that Foresight thing again. And now he's going in for another Brick Break, eh? Well too bad impy, you just got Sucker Punch'd! And is that one more Night Slash? Well impy, looks like you're gonna have to faint! And doggy is the winner!


Quentin (M)
HP: 0 | EN: 22


Midnight (M)
HP: 12 | EN: 25 | Speed: 75
Stats: 5/1/4/2
Abilities: Pressure, Super Luck, Justified
Other: Faked out, Foresight (3 more actions)

Midnight uses Night Slash for 4 energy
Roll a D16 for crit (boosted to 4/16): 1 - crit
Quentin takes (7+3+3+(5-3)*1.5)=16 damage

Quentin uses Foresight for 6 energy
Pressure increases the energy cost by 2
Quentin can see through Midnight's illusions for 6 actions

Quentin's Torment counter drops to 0
Midnight's Foresight counter drops to 5

Midnight uses Sucker Punch for 5 energy
Roll a D16 for crit (boosted to 2/16): 5 - no crit
Quentin takes (8+3+(5-3)*1.5)=14 damage

Quentin uses Brick Break for 6 energy
Pressure increases the energy cost by 2
Hits the real Midnight due to Foresight
Roll a D16 for crit: 16 - no crit
Midnight takes (8+(4-1)*1.5)*1.5=18.75 damage
Midnight's clones disappear

Midnight's Foresight counter drops to 4

Midnight uses Night Slash for 4 energy
Roll a D16 for crit (boosted to 4/16): 15 - no crit
Quentin takes (7+3+(5-3)*1.5)=13 damage
Quentin is KO'd by the attack

Midnight's Foresight counter drops to 3

Total damage:
Quentin: 90
Midnight: 88.25


Well, things were definitely not about to start getting crazy-go-nuts, so I gotta ...



... aw man! They didn't tell me you guys had two pokeymons! But I likes the look o' dis one.
 

Alchemator

my god if you don't have an iced tea for me when i
is a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
#14
This battle is dragging a little, and dslay has hit DQ time. I'll give him until Objection arrives I guess :(
 
#15
Dorkslay! Hey, brain-for-brains! You just gonna stand there and do nothing? That is it! I'm blowing this stupid battle with all these made-up monsters!

*enter Homestar Runner with a trophy*

Hey Stong Bad. Ooh, what's all this about?

Eh, just some lame fight between two geeknerds.

Oh. Well, you missed the email checking championship. And guess who got first prize!

What the? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooo........

---

Good job, Kim. Real good job. You just made me lose to Homestar at the thing that I do! I don't think I can check another email ever again.

== THE END ==

  • Alch gets 2 TC
  • Quentin the Sableye gets 2 MC and 1 DC
  • Dave the Druddigon gets 2 MC and 1 DC
  • Darkslay and his pokemon get nothing
  • Objection gets 2 RC
 
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