1. New to the forums? Check out our Mentorship Program!
    Our mentors will answer your questions and help you become a part of the community!
  2. Welcome to Smogon Forums! Please take a minute to read the rules.

An RU Warstory (My First Try)

Discussion in 'BW RU' started by saxtonhale, Aug 17, 2013.

  1. saxtonhale

    saxtonhale

    Joined:
    May 17, 2013
    Messages:
    85
    Howdy folks, this is saxton with my very first warstory (in RU of all places!) This was a really tough match, and my opponent played very well. Hope you enjoy!

    A quick introduction to my team:
    My actions will be in blue.
    Derrkat's will be in green.
    Comments will be in red.


    Radigan Conagher's team:

    Crustle / Poliwrath / Lickilicky / Spiritomb / Torterra / Cryogonal
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]

    derrkat21's team:

    {AT END OF STORY}

    Battle between derrkat21 and Radigan Conagher started!

    derrkat21 sent out Aerodactyl!

    saxtonhale sent out Torterra!

    The foe's Aerodactyl is exerting its pressure!
    [​IMG] vs. [​IMG]

    Turn 1

    The foe's Aerodactyl used Fire Fang!
    It's super effective! Torterra lost 32.2% of its health!

    The foe's Aerodactyl lost some of its HP!

    Torterra flinched and couldn't move!

    Torterra restored HP using its Leftovers!

    Sooo....first turn, already get flinched. I just know this is about to get ugly. Anyways, I lead with Torterra since Crustle matches up really badly against Aero. Just going to try and damage it.


    Turn 2

    The foe's Aerodactyl used Taunt!
    Torterra fell for the taunt!

    Torterra used Seed Bomb!
    The foe's Aerodactyl lost 52% of its health!

    Torterra restored HP using its Leftovers!

    I can 2HKO it with Seed Bomb, so I'm just going to finish it off and let Crustle in.


    [​IMG] (38%) vs. [​IMG] (80%)
    Turn 3

    derrkat21 withdrew Aerodactyl!
    derrkat21 sent out Persian!


    Torterra used Seed Bomb!
    The foe's Persian lost 58.0% of its health!

    Torterra restored HP using its Leftovers!

    Well, honestly I should have expected a switch. Aero's probably his SR setter, he doesn't want to kill it off early and have Cryogonal cancel it out. Anyways, Persian is a physical attacker, and he can barely touch Torterra, so I'm not worried.

    [​IMG] (38%) ---> [​IMG] (42%) vs. [​IMG] (86%-ish)
    Turn 4


    The foe's Persian used Fake Out!
    A critical hit! Torterra lost 29.7% of its health!

    Torterra flinched and couldn't move!

    Torterra restored HP using its Leftovers!
    Torterra's taunt wore off!


    Turn 5

    The foe's Persian used Return!
    Torterra lost 28.9% of its health!

    Torterra used Earthquake!
    The foe's Persian lost 42% of its health!
    The foe's Persian fainted!

    Torterra restored HP using its Leftovers!

    derrkat21 sent out Gallade!

    Excellent. Torterra is still in decent health and he's lost one of his pokes, and still no hazards yet. However, I know Gallades have Ice Punch a lot (which will kill Tort) and Aero is still alive, so it's not over yet.

    derrkat21: 5
    saxtonhale: 6

    [​IMG] (quaked) ---> [​IMG] (100%) vs. [​IMG] (40 or so%)
    Turn 6

    The foe's Gallade used Poison Jab!
    Torterra lost 17.8% of its health!

    Torterra used Leech Seed!
    The foe's Gallade was seeded!

    Torterra restored HP using its Leftovers!
    The foe's Gallade's health is sapped by Leech Seed!


    Well, for some reason, he's running Poison Jab on Gallade, which Tort can handle well, giving me time to set up Leech Seed (I was honestly expecting SD or Sub or something.)

    Turn 7

    The foe's Gallade used Psycho Cut!
    A critical hit! Torterra lost 36.5% of its health!
    Torterra fainted!

    That wasn't very helpful :| but anyways, Tort has fallen to Gallade, though I've KOed a poke of his and got seeds in. Good job, Torterra! Gallade can't touch Crustle, so I'm going to sneak in some hazards.

    derrkat21: 5
    saxtonhale: 5

    saxtonhale sent out Crustle!

    [​IMG] (88%, seeded) vs. [​IMG] (sliced, diced) ---> [​IMG] (100%)

    Turn 8

    derrkat21 withdrew Gallade!
    derrkat21 sent out Qwilfish!

    Crustle used Stealth Rock!
    Pointed stones float in the air around the foe's team!

    Not very worried about Qwilfish here, as Waterfall can't do too much to me and TWave doesn't make much of a difference to Crustle. Time to hazard up!


    [​IMG] ---> [​IMG] (100%) vs. [​IMG] (100%)
    Turn 9

    The foe's Qwilfish used Waterfall!
    It's super effective! Crustle lost 30.9% of its health!

    Crustle used Spikes!
    Spikes were scattered all around the feet of the foe's team!

    Crustle restored HP using its Leftovers!

    Turn 10

    The foe's Qwilfish used Waterfall!
    It's super effective! Crustle lost 33.8% of its health!

    Crustle flinched and couldn't move!

    Crustle restored HP using its Leftovers!

    Ugh, that's FAAAAANTASTIC. Flinching is my worst enemy, it's why I can't beat Togekiss. Anyways, I was right; Qwilfish is consistently doing around 30% with Waterfall, and I've gotten up two hazards, so I'm happy. I decide to be greedy and go for one more layer.


    [​IMG] (100%) vs. [​IMG] (48%)
    Turn 11

    The foe's Qwilfish used Waterfall!
    It's super effective! Crustle lost 30.9% of its health!

    Crustle used Spikes!
    Spikes were scattered all around the feet of the foe's team!
    Crustle restored HP using its Leftovers!

    Turn 12

    saxtonhale called Crustle back!
    saxtonhale sent out Poliwrath!


    The foe's Qwilfish used Waterfall!
    It doesn't affect Poliwrath...

    I'm in a good position. Crustle has done his job, but I'll either keep him as fodder for later or get him healthy with a Wish. Anyways, Poli is coming out to take on Qwilfish and begin Circle Throwing his heart out.

    [​IMG] (100%) vs. [​IMG] (23%, good job!) ---> [​IMG] (100%)

    Turn 13

    The foe's Qwilfish used Toxic!
    Poliwrath was badly poisoned!

    Poliwrath used Circle Throw!
    It's not very effective... The foe's Qwilfish lost 8% of its health!
    Galvantula was dragged out!

    The foe's Galvantula is hurt by the spikes!
    Pointed stones dug into the foe's Galvantula!

    Poliwrath was hurt by poison!

    Oh. That's...
    GODDAMNIT
    The one thing he's got that Poli can't handle is the first to come out. Looks like phazing will have to wait, I've got to switch out. It's a shame I don't have Tort, I bet this thing has Specs.

    [​IMG] (92%, phazed) ---> [​IMG] (about 60%) vs. [​IMG] (94%, poisoned)

    Turn 14

    saxtonhale called back Poliwrath!
    saxtonhale sent out Cryogonal!


    The foe's Galvantula used Thunder!
    Cryogonal lost 50.1% of its health!
    Cryogonal is paralyzed! It may be unable to move!

    Cryogonal restored HP using its Leftovers!

    That's pretty damn unlucky. I really need Cryo to be relatively quick.

    But seriously, fuck that. Cryo will very likely be 2HKOed by that, but I'm going to stay in to see what he does.


    [​IMG] (60%) vs. [​IMG] (94%, poisoned) ---> [​IMG] (50%, paralyzed)

    Turn 15

    derrkat21 withdrew Galvantula!
    derrkat21 sent out Aerodactyl!


    Pointed stones dug into the foe's Aerodactyl!

    The foe's Aerodactyl is exerting its pressure!

    Cryogonal is paralyzed! It can't move!

    Cryogonal restored HP using its Leftovers!

    He brings in Aero to set up the all-important SR. I've got to switch out to keep Cryo alive and get rid of that status. Expecting a Stone Edge, I switch to Poliwrath.
    [​IMG] (60%) ---> [​IMG] (26%) vs. [​IMG] (50%, slow as shit)
    Turn 16

    saxtonhale called back Cryogonal!
    saxtonhale sent out Poliwrath!


    The foe's Aerodactyl used Fire Fang!
    It's not very effective... Poliwrath lost 8.1% of its health!
    The foe's Aerodactyl lost some of its HP!

    Poliwrath was hurt by poison!

    Even better than Stone Edge or SR, he goes for the Fire Fang. The Lo recoil has brought him down to almost no health, so I've just got to stick it out.
    That sounds wrong.


    [​IMG] (16%) vs. [​IMG] (50%) ---> [​IMG] (80%, poisoned)
    Turn 17

    The foe's Aerodactyl used Earthquake!
    Poliwrath lost 24.0% of its health!
    The foe's Aerodactyl lost some of its HP!

    The foe's Aerodactyl fainted!

    Poliwrath used Circle Throw!
    But there was no target...

    Poliwrath was hurt by poison!

    derrkat21 sent out Galvantula!
    The foe's Galvantula is hurt by the spikes!
    Pointed stones dug into the foe's Galvantula!

    That thing's finally gone, so now I can permanently remove the accursed SR. Poli's going to die fast with that Toxic on him, so it's looking about time to get my cleric out here.

    derrkat21: 4
    saxtonhale: 5

    [​IMG]
    (suicided) ---> [​IMG] (19% or so) vs. [​IMG] (44%, poisoned)

    Turn 18

    saxtonhale called back Poliwrath!
    saxtonhale sent out Lickilicky!


    The foe's Galvantula used Thunder!
    Lickilicky lost 42.7% of its health!
    Lickilicky is paralyzed! It may be unable to move!

    Lickilicky restored HP using its Leftovers!

    [​IMG]

    FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

    Turn 19

    The foe's Galvantula used Thunder!
    Lickilicky lost 47.6% of its health!

    Lickilicky is paralyzed! It can't move!

    Lickilicky restored HP using its Leftovers!

    Well, after last turn's...unfortunate events, things can really only get better, right?
    WRONG MOTHAFUCKA
    "Lickilicky is paralyzed! It can't move!
    "is paralyzed!"
    "
    IS PARALYZED"

    So things got worse. I now can't survive another Thunder and I didn't get off the Heal Bell. Now I'm going to have to switch in something and lose a lot of health.

    [​IMG] (about 19%, still gay) vs. [​IMG] (around 25%, paralyzed)

    Turn 20

    saxtonhale called back Lickilicky!
    saxtonhale sent out Spiritomb!

    Spiritomb is exerting its pressure!

    The foe's Galvantula used Thunder!
    Spiritomb lost 68.4% of its health!

    Spiritomb restored HP using its Leftovers!

    Well, I dislike having my Spiritomb take so much damage, but I know that Shadow Sneak will finally kill this fucking thing. God, I'm really taking the battle too seriously.

    On another note, to interrupt the battle, I really do think people have really started to take the game a little too seriously, most notably in OU from my observation. Am I being a bit of a hypocrite? Yes, but it doesn't change it. I mean, the reason tiers stagnate is because everyone has to use the pokes that will make winning the easiest (I mean loading up on Keldeo and Lando-T.) Why not try something a little more challenging?
    Sorry to interrupt. Back to the game.


    [​IMG] (19%) vs. [​IMG] (25%, paralyzed) ---> [​IMG] (38%)
    Turn 21

    Spiritomb used Shadow Sneak!
    The foe's Galvantula lost 18% of its health!

    The foe's Galvantula fainted!

    Spiritomb restored HP using its Leftovers!

    derrkat21 sent out Ferroseed!

    Pointed stones dug into the foe's Ferroseed!
    The foe's Ferroseed is hurt by the spikes!

    derrkat21: 3
    saxtonhale: 5

    YES HUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHEUEHEU
    I finally got rid of it, and the greatest threat to my team is now gone.
    Ferroseed has come out, so maybe Aero wasn't his only setter after all.

    [​IMG] (twilit) ---> [​IMG] (around 80%) vs. [​IMG] (44%)

    Turn 22

    Spiritomb used Will-O-Wisp!
    The foe's Ferroseed was burned!

    The foe's Ferroseed used Gyro Ball!
    Spiritomb lost 8.9% of its health!

    Spiritomb restored HP using its Leftovers!
    The foe's Ferroseed was hurt by its burn!


    Turn 23

    saxtonhale called back Spiritomb!
    saxtonhale sent out Lickilicky!


    The foe's Ferroseed used Thunder Wave!
    Lickilicky is already paralyzed.

    Lickilicky restored HP using its Leftovers!
    The foe's Ferroseed was hurt by its burn!

    Seeing as he can't really harm me and I've got him WoWed, I'm going to get rid of all the pesky stati on my team, and pass some Wishes.

    [​IMG] (56%) vs. [​IMG] (50%) ---> [​IMG] (31%, paralyzed)

    Turn 24

    Lickilicky used Heal Bell!
    A bell chimed! (All team members cleared of status.)

    The foe's Ferroseed used Stealth Rock!
    Pointed stones float in the air around your team!

    Lickilicky restored HP using its Leftovers!
    The foe's Ferroseed was hurt by its burn!


    Turn 25

    Lickilicky used Wish!

    The foe's Ferroseed used Spikes!
    Spikes were scattered all around the feet of your team!

    Lickilicky restored HP using its Leftovers!
    The foe's Ferroseed was hurt by its burn!


    Turn 26

    saxtonhale called back Lickilicky!
    saxtonhale sent out Cryogonal!


    Pointed stones dug into Cryogonal!

    The foe's Ferroseed used Spikes!
    Spikes were scattered all around the feet of your team!

    Lickilicky's wish came true!

    Cryogonal restored HP using its Leftovers!
    The foe's Ferroseed was hurt by its burn!

    Not to toot my own horn here, but I just made some very solid plays. After healing Cryo, I brought him in to stall out Ferroseed and spin his hazards. Things are looking bright.

    [​IMG] (20%) vs. [​IMG] (43%) ---> [​IMG] (around 90%)

    Turn 27

    Cryogonal used Rapid Spin!
    It's not very effective... The foe's Ferroseed lost 0% of its health!

    Cryogonal is hurt by the foe's Ferroseed's Iron Barbs!

    The spikes disappeared from around your team's feet!
    The pointed stones disappeared from around your team!

    The foe's Ferroseed used Gyro Ball!
    It's super effective! Cryogonal lost 61.2% of its health!

    Cryogonal restored HP using its Leftovers!
    The foe's Ferroseed was hurt by its burn!

    Kind of forgot about Gyro Ball, but I'm not worried because I can stall him one more turn with Recover, and no more hazards!

    Turn 28

    Cryogonal used Recover!
    Cryogonal regained health!

    The foe's Ferroseed used Gyro Ball!
    It's super effective! Cryogonal lost 57.7% of its health!

    Cryogonal restored HP using its Leftovers!
    The foe's Ferroseed was hurt by its burn!


    The foe's Ferroseed fainted!

    derrkat21 sent out Gallade!

    The foe's Gallade is hurt by the spikes!
    Pointed stones dug into the foe's Gallade!

    derrkat21: 2
    saxtonhale: 5

    Ferroseed being gone is a great boon for me, because now he's got no concrete wall and I can stall him out no problem.

    [​IMG] (painfully burned to death) ---> [​IMG] (about 66%) vs. [​IMG] (about 22%)

    Turn 29

    saxtonhale called Cryogonal back!
    saxtonhale sent out Spiritomb!


    Spiritomb is exerting its pressure!

    The foe's Gallade used Close Combat!
    It doesn't affect Spiritomb...

    Spiritomb restored HP using its Leftovers!

    I knew he was just trying to get rid of Cryo, so I switched in Spiritomb to take whatever he had for me, as neither STAB could hit me.

    [​IMG] (66%) vs. [​IMG] (22%) ---> [​IMG] (56%)

    Turn 30

    derrkat21 withdrew Gallade!
    derrkat21 sent out Qwilfish!

    Pointed stones dug into the foe's Qwilfish!
    The foe's Qwilfish is hurt by the spikes!

    Spiritomb used Foul Play!
    The foe's Qwilfish lost 31% of its health!

    The foe's Qwilfish restored HP using its Black Sludge!
    Spiritomb restored HP using its Leftovers!

    He brings in Qwilfish presumably to Toxic me and start wearing away with Waterfall. I'll stay in and sack Spiritomb to help my next poke.

    [​IMG] (66%) ---> [​IMG] (around 39%) vs. [​IMG] (62%)

    Turn 31

    Spiritomb used Shadow Sneak!
    The foe's Qwilfish lost 14.0% of its health!

    Spiritomb was poisoned! (Poison Point)

    The foe's Qwilfish used Toxic!
    But it failed!

    The foe's Qwilfish restored HP using its Black Sludge!
    Spiritomb restored HP using its Leftovers!
    Spiritomb was hurt by poison!

    That sucks ass, but no matter, Tomb is going down anyways.

    [​IMG] (31%) vs. [​IMG] (56%)

    Turn 32

    The foe's Qwilfish used Waterfall!
    Spiritomb lost 23.7% of its health!

    Spiritomb flinched and couldn't move!

    The foe's Qwilfish restored HP using its Black Sludge!
    Spiritomb restored HP using its Leftovers!
    Spiritomb was hurt by poison!


    [​IMG] (37%) vs. [​IMG] (27%)
    Turn 33

    Spiritomb used Shadow Sneak!
    The foe's Qwilfish lost 12% of its health!

    The foe's Qwilfish used Hidden Power!
    Spiritomb lost 8.6% of its health!

    The foe's Qwilfish restored HP using its Black Sludge!
    Spiritomb restored HP using its Leftovers!
    Spiritomb was hurt by poison!

    Don't really know what the deal was with Hidden Power, but it let me live one more turn, so I don't really care either. Almost done here!


    Turn 34

    Spiritomb used Shadow Sneak!
    The foe's Qwilfish lost 13% of its health!

    The foe's Qwilfish used Waterfall!
    Spiritomb lost 13.0% of its health!

    Spiritomb fainted!

    The foe's Qwilfish restored HP using its Black Sludge!

    saxtonhale sent out Poliwrath!

    derrkat21: 2
    saxtonhale: 4

    With that said and done, it's time to finish this hoedown. Qwilfish is in bad shape, and as far as I know, he hasn't got Pain Split, so Poli is coming in.

    [​IMG] (about 25%) vs. [​IMG] (valiantly fallen) ---> [​IMG] (44%)

    Turn 35

    The foe's Qwilfish used Toxic!
    Poliwrath was badly poisoned!

    Poliwrath used Rest!
    Poliwrath fell asleep!
    Poliwrath slept and became healthy!
    Poliwrath ate its Chesto Berry!
    Poliwrath woke up!

    The foe's Qwilfish restored HP using its Black Sludge!

    I was going to Rest this turn no matter what he did, so it turned out well this way. Even if I get Toxiced, he's finished.

    [​IMG] (31%) vs. [​IMG] (100%)

    Turn 36

    The foe's Qwilfish used Toxic!
    Poliwrath was badly poisoned!

    Poliwrath used Circle Throw!
    It's not very effective... The foe's Qwilfish lost 9% of its health!

    Gallade was dragged out!

    Pointed stones dug into the foe's Gallade!
    The foe's Gallade is hurt by the spikes!

    Poliwrath was hurt by poison!

    Qwilfish can't come back in, and now it's just these two Fighting types. Let's THROW DOWN HOMEBOY

    [​IMG] (22%) ---> [​IMG] (44%) vs. [​IMG] (94%, poisoned)

    Turn 37

    The foe's Gallade used Psycho Cut!
    It's super effective! Poliwrath lost 50% of its health!

    Poliwrath used Scald!
    The foe's Gallade lost 24% of its health!

    Poliwrath was hurt by poison!

    Aaaaaannnddd...

    Turn 38

    The foe's Gallade used Psycho Cut!
    It's super effective! Poliwrath lost 31.3% of its health!

    Poliwrath fainted!

    saxtonhale sent out Cryogonal!

    derrkat21: 2
    saxtonhale: 3

    Poli had to die, but it's over now, so may he rest in peace.

    [​IMG] (20%) vs. [​IMG] (a fallen colossus) ---> [​IMG] (like 31%)

    Turn 39

    The foe's Gallade used Shadow Sneak!
    Cryogonal lost 29.4% of its health!

    Cryogonal used Ice Beam!
    A critical hit! The foe's Gallade lost 19% of its health!

    The foe's Gallade fainted!

    Cryogonal restored HP using its Leftovers!

    derrkat21 sent out Qwilfish!

    Pointed stones dug into the foe's Qwilfish!
    The foe's Qwilfish is hurt by the spikes!

    The foe's Qwilfish fainted!

    derrkat21: 0
    saxtonhale: 3


    Radigan Conagher won the battle!

    Hope everyone enjoyed this warstory! Please leave criticisms if you like, it is my first one after all. Thanks to derrkat for a fun battle!
    -saxton

    derrkat's team:
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]

  2. Mack the Knife

    Mack the Knife Goodbye Smogon! I may return, I may not!
    is a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2013
    Messages:
    644
    Sorry to say this but, this warstory was pretty mediocre, with kinda bad commentary, and pretty bad opponent. Also, with team preview you ought put the opponents teamm at the top as well. The one part I did like, however, was that nice play with Lickilicky and Cryognal.
  3. Silvershadow234

    Silvershadow234 :]]]]]
    is a Pre-Contributor
    Mentor

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2012
    Messages:
    737
    Ye I agree with mack the knife tbh. There was a lot of game changing hax, specifically the para on licky. His team was really quite bad and there weren't any particularly good plays-though there aren't going to be when you're stuck against someone this bad. Sry to say but this wasn't a good warstory :/
  4. Nozzle

    Nozzle

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2012
    Messages:
    918
    I do think though that you have potential. If you can find a great battle with a lot of predictions i believe that you could get an entertaining warstory out of this.
  5. Explorer

    Explorer

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    684
    It was a good battle. In the future, if you want to make warstories even more exciting, follow this tip I learned from reading other warstories: add more commentary, particularly what you predict the opponent will do, and what you think the opponent is predicting you do. It might also bump up your win record. Go Torterra!
    Turtleye likes this.
  6. saxtonhale

    saxtonhale

    Joined:
    May 17, 2013
    Messages:
    85
    Thanks for the criticisms all! Looking back on it, it wasn't a notably good battle but I had to get started somewhere. A learning experience
  7. Mack the Knife

    Mack the Knife Goodbye Smogon! I may return, I may not!
    is a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2013
    Messages:
    644
    I'm glad your learning from other's criticism's instead of raging, ala Kevin Smith. I'll be looking forward to your next warstory to see how much you'll improve.
  8. Explorer

    Explorer

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    684
    I should add that I will sometimes watch live battles between other players to practice prediction, developing skills I can apply to my own battles.
  9. Nozzle

    Nozzle

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2012
    Messages:
    918
    Prediction is hard to learn. First you need to figure out how the opponent plays and base your predictions around that. But the opponent could mess with your mind and instead doing something completely different.

Users Viewing Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 0)