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[COMPLETED] Charizard

Discussion in 'XY Previews' started by Subject 18, Oct 25, 2013.

  1. Subject 18

    Subject 18
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    Charizard #6
    [​IMG]

    [Pros]

    <ul>
    <li>Good movepool for both of its Mega Evolutions to make use of.</li>
    <li>Mega Evolutions are fairly bulky.</li>
    <li>Mega Charizard Y is an amazing wallbreaker in the sun being able to muscle his way past </li>
    <li>Mega Charizard X on the other hand is a terrifying Dragon Dancer with great coverage.</li>
    <li>Doesn't fear burn like other Dragon Dancer user such as Salamence or Dragonite.</p>
    <li>With access to two Mega Evolutions countering it is a tough task to the the unpredictability.</li>
    </ul>

    [Cons]

    <ul>
    <li>Still hampered by the presence of Stealth Rock.</li>
    <li>Sun only lasts five turns now.</li>
    <li>Low speed stat.</li>
    </ul>

    [Set Recommedations]

    <p>name: Dragon Dance<br />
    move 1: Dragon Dance<br />
    move 2: Flare Blitz<br />
    move 3: Dragon Claw / Outrage<br />
    move 4: Roost<br />
    ability: Blaze<br />
    item: Charizardite-X<br />
    evs: 4 Def / 252 Atk / 252 Spe<br />
    nature: Adamant / Jolly</p>

    <p>Charizard receives a major buff in Mega Charizard X: one that allows him to become a dangerous sweeper capable of running multiple sets and accomplishing many a task. With Mega Charizard X, Charizard becomes a very similar to Dragonite with a secondary Fire typing and a huge movepool. This set allows Charizard to break through almost all of its potential counters and hit anything hard neutrally. After one Dragon Dance, nothing in the game will be able to switch in and absorb a hit without fearing an OHKO or 2HKO. Flare Blitz provides enough the brute force which obliterates most physical walls but will greatly reduce your lifespan due to the recoil. With this said, Roost makes for a great option in the last slot to recover health and last much longer in the game.</p>

    <p>An alternate EV spread can be used for added bulk to be able to setup multiple Dragon Dances for more effective sweeps. A spread of 248 HP / 84 SDef / 176 Spd can be use

    <p>Mega Charizard X is easily one of the most threatening Dragon Dancer users at the moment. With his typing he can easily setup on Scald and Will-O-Wisp users without fearing a crippling burn. Having this puts him on par with Salamence and Dragonite as Dragon Dance sweepers. However, Charizard is not unlike Dragonite and Salamence in that having control of the entry hazards is needed; thus having a teammate that is able to either Rapid Spin or Defog to remove Stealth Rock. Excadrill is a good example of this role. Other teammates that are able to beat Pokemon such as Hippowdon, Slowbro who are problematic for Mega Charizard X. Zapdos, Breloom, and Jolteon are all to handle the previously mentioned Pokemon. Due to his somewhat low base Speed, base 100 Speed Choice Scarf Garchomp out speed Jolly Charizard after a Dragon Dance, and take you out. To help get around this, Sticky Web provides the support for Mega Charizard X to be able to set up and begin sweeping.</p>


    <p>name: Bulky Will-o-Wisp<br />
    move 1: Flare Blitz<br />
    move 2: Dragon Claw<br />
    move 3: Will-o-Wisp<br />
    move 4: Roost<br />
    ability: Blaze<br />
    item: Charizadite X<br />
    evs: 248 HP / 84 SDef / 176 Spd<br />
    nature: Jolly Nature</p>

    <p>Mega Charizard X with good 78 / 111 / 85 bulk can even take the role of a bulky attacker. Being able to wear down opposing team with dual STABs in Flare Blitz and Dragon Claw, while being able act as sort of a pivot switch. With Roost its longevity is greatly boosted, allowing it to recover off the Flare Blitz recoil, Stealth Rock damage and damage from any attacks it takes. Will-o-Wisp on the surface may be a odd move choice but being able to burn Azumarill on the switch is amazing essentially rendering it a non-threat for the rest of you team.</p>

    <p>The EV spread gives you great all around bulky both on the physical side and the special side. The 248 HP EVs gives you an odd HP number meaning you take a a little less from Stealth Rock to give you more chances to switch in while Stealth Rock is up. 176 Spd with a Jolly Nature will outspeed Jolly Lucario before it Mega Evolves and be able to OHKO it with a Flare Blitz. The remaining 84 EVs are placed into special defense to take Rotom-W's attacks a little better.</p>

    <p>Despite being bulky and having Roost, Stealth Rock still puts a damper on Mega Charizard. Teammates like Excadrill, and Forretress make good teammates as they are able to spin away the rocks. Since this set isn't meant for sweeping purposes rather to cripple certain threats with burns and wear down the opposing team, teammates that appreciate having Azumarill burned including any dragons like Garchomp and Dragonite.</p>


    <p>name: Mega Charizard-Y<br />
    move 1: Fire Blast<br />
    move 2: Focus Blast<br />
    move 3: Solar Beam<br />
    move 4: Dragon Pulse / Roost<br />
    ability: Blaze Solar Power<br />
    item: Charizadite-Y<br />
    evs: 4 Def / 252 SpA / 252 Spe<br />
    nature: Timid</p>

    <p>What sets Mega Charizard Y apart from Mega Charizard X is the massive Special Attack increase and access to Drought. With Drought backing his Fire STAB attacks Mega Charizard Y really cannot be taken lightly, solely based on power it has to be a threatening wallbreaker. With solid bulk, he is capable of taking a couple hits and and being able to stick around in battles while still posing a main threat to the other team. However, his base 100 Speed is pretty underwhelming, him outsped by many Pokemon naturally, which can be of an issue.</p>

    <p>This set is meant to take advantage of the massive Special Attack that Mega Evolution grants. Fire Blast is your primary STAB and allows you to blow holes in the other team to Pokemon that don't resist Fire. Focus Blast will to easily 2HKO Specially defensive Tyranitar in the Sand without the need for Stealth Rock being present. Solarbeam will hit bulky Water-types that will switch in to absorb a Fire Blast, such as Vaporeon or Politoed. Lastly, Dragon Pulse is need for Mega Charizard-Y to but able to hit Dragonite and Goodra, as you can't beat Goodra and don't enough damage to Dragonite to be significant. Roost is an option that allows for some recovery if you have taken some hits or switched in while Stealth Rock was up on your side of the field.</p>

    <p>Good teammates include those who are able to Rapid Spin and reliably beat Tyranitar. Excadrill is able to clear Stealth Rock and can take out Tyranitar with Earthquake or Iron Head. Despite Mega Charizard Y's great Special Attack, he can't hope to muscle past Blissey and Chansey, so any teammate that is able to combat those two one-on-one are greatly appreciated, allowing Mega Charizard Y to freely roam. Strong, physically offensive Pokemon such as Breloom, Excadrill, and Lucario are all good options for this role. To help make Mega Charizard Y deal with his low speed,a Sticky Web user on the team is recommended. Another option for the Speed issue would be using Tailwind over Roost and giving your entire team a temporary boost. This comes at a significant cost to your longevity, however.</p>

    <p>name: Mixed Mega Charizard-Y<br />
    move 1: Flare Blitz<br />
    move 2: Fire Blast / Overheat<br />
    move 3: Focus Blast / Brick Break<br />
    move 4: Hidden Power Ice / Earthquake<br />
    ability: Blaze<br />
    item: Charizadite-Y<br />
    evs: 252 Atk / 4 SpA / 252 Spe<br />
    nature: Naughty / Naive</p>

    <p>A Mega Charizard Y with maximized Special Attack has no way of getting past Blissey, Chansey, and most other special walls. With Charizard's increased Attack stat, and Drought to boost Fire-type moves, however, he can very well afford to use physical attacks, as odd as that may sound. However, Mega Charizard Y's huge Special Attack also comes into play; because it's so high, he doesn't really need to invest into it, as he can naturally hit hard with Drought Fire Blast alone. Notably, his uninvested Special Attack reaches 355, which is more than the maximized Attack.</p>

    <p>With that said, the idea behind this set is to lure Blissey and Chansey; the former takes 83.89 - 98.92% with Naughty, 76.84 - 90.33% with Naive, whereas the latter is 2HKOed: 51.98 - 61.36% with Naughty, 47.3 - 55.82% with Naive. Focus Blast is used over Brick Break because it has similar damage output to it on Tyranitar in sandstorm, and generally gets by common Rock- and Steel-types more easily. However if 252 HP Tyranitar is troublesome for you, Naughty Brick Break does 88.1% - 104%. Keep in mind, however, that Naive Brick Break does less than Focus Blast in Sandstorm. Fire Blast also manhandles many of the physically defensive Pokemon that might otherwise survive Flare Blitz (Conkeldurr and Hippowdon), and has higher damage output than Hidden Power Ice in sunlight, even when resisted. Hidden Power Ice is only really for Salamence and Dragonite.</p>

    <p>As usual, Mega Charizard Y needs entry hazard control. Specifically, Rapid Spin support, as well as some entry hazards of his own, Excadrill, Forretress are both able to fill this role. Goodra and Snorlax are still flat out stops for this set as well, neither taking more than half from anything it throws at them. Fighting types such as Lucario and Breloom are good options for dealing with Snorlax. For Goodra, strong physical attackers such as Garchomp, Salamence and Lucario can OHKO with their respective STABs. </p>


    [Checks and Counters]

    <p>Checks and counters for Mega Charizard X include strong, physically defensive Pokemon capable of taking a boosted attack and phaze him out, forcing him to take more Stealth Rock damage. RestTalk Gyarados works as a solid check with Intimidate as it is able to phaze Charizard out with Dragon Tail. Hippowdon can take any attack, Slack Off the damage and then phaze Charizard out with Roar or Whirlwind. Choice Scarf Garchomp is able to revenge kill at +1 as it's faster and can kill with an Outrage. If you are using Adamant Dragon Dance, you need to be wary of Choice Scarf Salamence who outspeeds you after one Dragon Dance. Azumarill can come in on any Dragon-type attack, take a hit, and OHKO with a Play Rough after Stealth Rock.</p>

    <p>Mega Charizard-Y is handled by strong, specially defensive Pokemon. Such as Assault Vest Goodra who resists most of its attacks while in being 2HKOed in return by Thunderbolt. Snorlax with an Assault Vest also makes for a great counter being able to sponge hits from both the Special and Mixed set. Assault Vest Tyranitar is able to switch in to any attack that isn't Focus Blast and threaten to kill with a Stone Edge. Having Stealth Rocks up on the field is a great help to keep Mega Charizard-Y from being able to switch in and out at will. Revenge killing it can be done my several Pokemon such as Garchomp who carries Stone Edge. Multiscale Dragonite can take a hit, set up a Dragon Dance and OHKO with an Outrage.</p>
    Last edited: Dec 11, 2013
  2. mrglass

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    What about HP Grass to deal with Ground and Rock types?
  3. PDC

    PDC from where???
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    charizard-y is actually pretty cool, but i'll focus on x for now.

    first i will focus on counters and stuff like that. mention hippowdon as a check because it is bulky enough to take any moves this guy has, and considering eq now hits it for SE. it is a far better check then gyarados or even blastoise, but mainly the more physically inclined variants.

    i personally like an adamant nature for dd. jolly is cool, but jolly is not really helping you must after you dd, as most base 100 scarfers aren't very good against this guy anyway, and those that would be aren't even out yet. those that tie are just hopeless or not very good, so the only benefit of jolly would be pre-dragon dance. i don't think you're gaining too much by running jolly, and adamant gives you much more additional power which i think is worth it.

    example calcs:

    Jolly - +1 132 Atk Landorus-T Outrage vs. 248 HP / 228+ Def Rotom-W: 247-292 (81.51 - 96.36%) -- 56.25% chance to OHKO after Stealth Rock (charizard-x's attack is correct)

    Adamant - +1 132+ Atk Landorus-T Outrage vs. 248 HP / 228+ Def Rotom-W: 271-321 (89.43 - 105.94%) -- guaranteed OHKO after Stealth Rock

    Jolly - 132 Atk Landorus-T Outrage vs. 88 HP / 4 Def Gyarados: 285-336 (80.73 - 95.18%) -- guaranteed OHKO after Stealth Rock

    Adamant - 132+ Atk Landorus-T Outrage vs. 88 HP / 4 Def Gyarados: 313-369 (88.66 - 104.53%) -- guaranteed OHKO after Stealth Rock

    as you can tell, there is an obvious difference and i believe that adamant overall is superior, at least for now.
  4. LeetJizuz

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    I've actually been working on Charizard-Y I suppose I can contribute to this thread with what I've found viable.

    GoldenZard Y

    -Flamethrower/Fire Blast
    -Solarbeam/Focus Blast
    -Air Slash/Overheat
    -Roost/Roar

    Since Zard Y has no real means of setting up I used roar to use its speed to its advantage and hope that it switches in something fight-able. If not I'll just roar again. Roost is for sustain since Y is easily damaged by Stealth Rocks, but since Y can only hit hard during Drought I highly suggest not prioritizing over Roar unless you use a bulky zard.

    Solarbeam hits hard on those pesky Water/Rock/Ground types that pose a threat to zard. Remember to only use this move during Drought. Focus Blast on the other hand is usable after Drought so it's pretty useful.

    Flamethrower/Fire Blast is a hard hitting Fire-type move that can 2HKO or OHKO during Drought. I would use Flamethrower because of its accuracy but Fire Blast has earned me most of my OHKO in drought.

    Air Slash/Overheat all usable moves and adds to Y's versatile moveset. I prefer Overheat as a last resort move but Air Slash as a move to take down those annoying fighting types. I say if you know what you're up against apply ahead.

    Natures:

    Modest (-Atk +SpAtk) @ 252SpAtk/252Speed
    This is highly suggested under a Drought oriented team as Y really benefits from Drought always. Solarbeam is a staple. OHKOs most neutral types under Drought.

    Timid (-Atk +Speed) @ 200Def/100Speed/108SpAtk/100HP or 252Def/200Speed/52SpAtk
    This is my bulky Y build. Its where I use Zard @ Roost. He hits 2HKOs most of the time and Y can tank SpAttacks decently this is a more anti-StoneEdge set and most of the time he can live SRocks & Survive a non-stab stone edge.

    Since Zard Y cannot really set up I suggest running a Calm Mind baton pass team and set up 1-2 Calm Minds and prepare to sweep under Drought (w/ Modest).

    Test these sets out if you're curious.
    hansenchaze likes this.
  5. alexwolf

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    PDC are you taking into account Tough Claws?
  6. mrglass

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    You might want to test this set for Y as well

    Nature: Timid
    Fire Blast
    SolarBeam
    Focus Blast
    Flame Charge

    SolarBeam and Fire Blast for the reasons LeetJizuz said.
    Focus Blast to deal with Heatran and Tyranitar, who both are difficult for Zard Y to deal with
    Flame Charge gives Charizard Y a way of boosting it's speed, breaking sashes and sturdy, and gives it a more reliable alternative to Fire Blast when you don't need to do much damage to KO
  7. Flamer

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    Uhhh just a little nitpick, you have said that skarm has a small chance of surviving fire punch. Is that after SR because Skarmory survives anyway due to sturdy.
  8. PDC

    PDC from where???
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    Yes, I edited in the damage calc to 1.2 X Outrage's original damage.
  9. alexwolf

    alexwolf Fear the D
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    Iirc Tough Claws boosts contact moves by 30%. Here are the calcs with Adamant and a 30% power boosting Tough Claws:
    • +1 252+ Atk Tough Claws Mega Charizard X Outrage vs. 248 HP / 228+ Def Rotom-W: 294-347 (97.02 - 114.52%) -- guaranteed OHKO after Stealth Rock
    • +1 252 Atk Tough Claws Mega Charizard X Outrage vs. 248 HP / 228+ Def Rotom-W: 266-316 (87.78 - 104.29%) -- guaranteed OHKO after Stealth Rock
    • 252+ Atk Tough Claws Mega Charizard X Outrage vs. 88 HP / 4 Def Gyarados: 339-399 (96.03 - 113.03%) -- guaranteed OHKO after Stealth Rock
    • 252 Atk Tough Claws Mega Charizard X Outrage vs. 88 HP / 4 Def Gyarados: 308-364 (87.25 - 103.11%) -- guaranteed OHKO after Stealth Rock
    Also, it's worth mentioning that Rotom-W can't OHKO Mega Charizard X back so it can just set up a second DD and OHKO with +2 Dragon Claw.

    Move EQ in the last slot and mention that a combination of two Fire moves + one Dragon move or two Dragon moves + one Fire move is a good option if you don't care about Aegislash's King's Shield mindgames (Azumarill is not a target of EQ, it's hit harder by Flare Blitz). Actually, i think that the main set should be this:

    <p>Charizard @ Charizadite-X<br />
    Ability: Tough Claws<br />
    EVs: 4 Def / 252 Atk / 252 Spe <br />
    Adamant / Jolly Nature <br />
    - Dragon Dance<br />
    - Flare Blitz / Fire Punch<br />
    - Dragon Claw / Outrage br />
    - Fire Punch / Dragon Claw / Earthquake</p>

    +1 Flare Blitz is stupidly powerful, doing ~70% to physically defensive Hippowdon and ~68% damage to Azumarill, while also not locking you in and leaving you easily revenge killed by Fairy-types after. Dragon Claw is also very strong at +1 and has enough power to OHKO most of the Pokemon you want it for and those that you can't (Rotom-W and Gyarados) can't OHKO you back anyway while you just setup another Dragon Dance. Outrage is ok but Fairy-types revenge kill you easily after you KO something, which is why it is slashed second. On the last slot, Fire Punch is there to KO things without taking recoil, making Mega Charizard X much harder to revenge kill (the recoil from KOing Pokemon such as Ferrothorn with Flare Blitz is huge), while Dragon Claw is an option if you are using Outrage on the 3rd slot, to have a reliable Dragon move that doesn't lock you in. Finally, Earthquake is useful for King's Shield Aegislash and that's it i think.
  10. Subject 18

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    Okay cool. Thanks I'll make changes and update when I get back home from class.
  11. Subject 18

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    Updated. Let me know if I missed anything.

    Edit: AccidentalGreed, can you post that mixed set you tried? I feel it should be added.
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2013
  12. mrglass

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    You may want to include some ways to patch up Zard Y's speed like Sticky Web, Tailwind, Dragon Dance for a mixed set, or Flame Charge.
  13. ShootingStarmie

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    Okay, regular Charizard should not be getting a set. I'd suggest taking it out.

    Azumarill needs to be on the checks and counters list, it's immune to Outrage and resists Flare Blitz.

    I'll be happy to stamp this after these changes Sub 18 :]
  14. Subject 18

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    Added in Sticky Web.

    Done.
  15. ShootingStarmie

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    QC APPROVED (1/3)
  16. Red3mpti0n

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    Nitpick. I know this is a WIP, nor am I QC, but XZard is really slashy. Most of them don't change how it's played. You can easily just leave EQ slashed with Fire Punch and put one sentence in the AC explaining that XZard isn't hurting for options and subbing a powerful move for a more consistent STAB - or vice versa - is perfectly viable. It just makes more sense to say HERE is the optimal moveset and THESE are also good options.

    No mention of Roost? It has pretty good bulk and typing to use it and can extend its sweep. Helps offset Flare Blitz Recoil as well. Also mention that unlike most Dragons, it's not weak to Ice Shard and resists Bullet Punch.
  17. AccidentalGreed

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    I'm sorry about the wait! Subject 18

    <p>Charizard @ Charizadite-Y<br />
    Ability: Drought<br />
    EVs: 252 Atk / 4 SpA / 252 Spe <br />
    Naughty / Naive Nature <br />
    - Flare Blitz<br />
    - Fire Blast / Overheat<br />
    - Focus Blast / Brick Break<br />
    - Hidden Power Ice / Earthquake</p>

    A Charizard-Y with maximized Special Attack has no way of getting past Blissey, Chansey, and most other special walls. With Charizard's increased Attack and Drought to boost Fire-type moves, however, it can very well afford to use physical attacks, as dumb as that sounds thanks to Charizard-X and that huge bulging Special Attack stat. However, Charizard-Y's huge Special Attack also comes into play; because it's so damn high, Charizard-Y doesn't really need to invest into it, as it can naturally hit hard with Drought Fire Blast alone. Notably, its uninvested Special Attack reaches 355, which is more than its Naughty maximized Attack.

    Anyhow, one of the main pointers of using this set is to lure in get by Blissey and Chansey rather easily; sun-boosted Flare Blitz does a huge number on both of them, with the former being nearly OHKO'd (83.89 - 98.92% with Naughty, 76.84 - 90.33% with Naive) and the latter being 2HKO'd, but unable to abuse Wish + Protect effectively (51.98 - 61.36% with Naughty, 47.3 - 55.82% with Naive). Focus Blast is used over Brick Break since it has similar damage output to it on Tyranitar in sandstorm, and generally gets by common physically-defensive Rock- and Steel-types easier. However if 252 HP Tyranitar pisses you off, Naughty Brick Break does 88.1% - 104%. Keep in mind, however, that Naive Brick Break does less than focus Blast in Sandstorm. to it Earthquake is for the occasional Heatran and Chandelure. Fire Blast also manhandles many physically defensive Pokemon that might otherwise survive Flare Blitz (read: Conkeldurr and Hippowdon), and has higher damage output than Hidden Power Ice when resisted in sun. Hidden Power Ice is only really for Salamence and Dragonite, and with its BP increase, it might disappoint.

    As usual, it needs entry hazard control. Specifically, it really appreciate Rapid Spin support (then again, what common draconically-based mixed attacker doesn't?), and enjoys some entry hazards of its own, since without Stealth Rock or Spikes it can't land an OHKO on Blissey. As a disclaimer, the reason why'd you want to use this is to summon sun (and get rid of pesky rain or sandstorm if they're detrimental to your team) and because of the lack of recoil; other similar mixed sweepers have issues since they have to take LO recoil in addition to passive damage.

    Keep in mind that I modified it a bit, as Heatran doesn't exist atm (limiting the use of Earthquake) and Tyranitar is still as popular and annoying as ever, making Naughty nature + Brick Break viable.
  18. PK Gaming

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  19. X5Dragon

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    http://www.smogon.com/forums/threads/charizard.3489940/

    Should help with some of the sets here. A few comments:

    1) Can we mention thunder punch as a option under the Physical CharX set?
    2) Solarbeam for the Mixed CharY one as a slash and Fire Spin as an option while noting the buff it has received?

    Also, with 130/130 stats CharX can go mixed as well:

    Charizard@CharizarditeX
    Nature: Naive/Rash
    Ability: Tough Claws
    EVs: 152 Atk/100 SpA/252 Speed or 252Atk/4 SpA/252 Speed

    Dragon Dance
    Fire Blast/Overheat
    Dragon Claw/Outrage
    Earth Quake/Thunder Punch
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2013
  20. Subject 18

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    X5Dragon, Thunder Punch is a tutor move isn't available at the moment. As for Fire Spin, what would you even use it for on Mega Charizard Y? I don't really see a need for it that the other moves can't accomplish.

    Can you explain the 152 Atk / 100 SpA / 252 Spe spread? Are there certain things you OHKO with that investment in Special Attack or is just a arbitrary number to make Fire Blast a little harder?
  21. X5Dragon

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    The Fire Spin is similar to the weather trapping set for Heatran though this can be used more independently and reliably. The 100 SpA started with trying to figure out what was needed to guarantee the 2HKO on Physical Hippodon:

    100 SpA Charizard Fire Blast vs. 252 HP / 4 SpD Hippowdon: 210-247 (50 - 58.8%) -- 72.66% chance to 2HKO
    100 SpA Charizard Fire Blast vs. 252 HP / 4 SpD Hippowdon: 210-247 (50 - 58.8%) -- guaranteed 2HKO after Stealth Rock

    0 SpA Charizard Fire Blast vs. 252 HP / 4 SpD Hippowdon: 195-229 (46.42 - 54.52%) -- 64.45% chance to 2HKO after Stealth Rock
    0 SpA Charizard Fire Blast vs. 252 HP / 4 SpD Hippowdon: 195-229 (46.42 - 54.52%) -- 6.64% chance to 2HKO

    That being said, 0 SpA is a 2HKO on everything else such as Gliscor, Donaphan and Rain Ferrothorn.
  22. Subject 18

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    Does it really need to trap other weather starters? The other weather starters lose to it anyway. Tyranitar dies to a combination of Fire Blast and Focus Blast, Politoed doesn't want to take a Solarbeam and Hippowdon dies to two Fire Blasts. I don't really see the need to trap any of the starters since you can beat them 1v1 if it really comes down to it.
  23. AccidentalGreed

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    2,664
    [​IMG]

    KABOOM APPROVED 3/3
  24. Subject 18

    Subject 18
    is a Forum Moderatoris a Contributor to Smogonis a Battle Server Moderator
    Moderator

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    Thanks AG, PK Gaming and ShootinStarmie for the checks.
  25. Zystral

    Zystral めんどくさい、な~
    is a Contributor Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus

    Joined:
    Apr 16, 2009
    Messages:
    1,610
    there were some weird-ass sentences in here, please exercise caution in future as you're writing.
    regarding the use of "its" vs "his", I personally prefer "it", but you used "he" at the beginning, yet deviated halfway though. I have highlighted the changes from "it" to "he" and so forth, but you're welcome to change it back to "it", as long as you are consistent.

    There were also some badly placed sentence constructors there, it feels as if you were trying to write two sentences at the same time and failed. As said, please be more careful.

    otherwise

    GP Approved

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