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How to convince Philip7086 to bathe again

Discussion in 'Inside Poop - April Fool's Day 2011' started by Delta 2777, Mar 29, 2011.

  1. Delta 2777

    Delta 2777 Machampion
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    Ok, so I'm sure the majority of you have seen this thread. Well, even if you haven't you probably don't need to - it's pretty obvious to all of us in the offices that Philip7086 hasn't bathed properly in months, possibly in years in contradiction to what he had posted. I think I may have thought that the smell was coming from Chris is Me in the recent months before he was evicted, and for that I truly feel bad about.

    So anyway the issue has gotten pretty bad. At one point I'm pretty sure his hair got so greasy he tried to play it off as a full-on mohawk, and combined with his mushroom cut it makes the entire staff look... at the very least... "unprofessional". Anyway, we've been paying off his family to not say anything about it as it could decrease his work ethic, and this is really putting a hampering on the site's funds (think of how long ago we could've eliminated server lag with that money).

    Any suggestions?
  2. kd24

    kd24 yo daddy musta been a drug dealer? why, cuz you're dope
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    drizzle politoed is our only hope
  3. Seven Deadly Sins

    Seven Deadly Sins ~hallelujah~
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    I say we light scented candles all over the office. Not only will it improve the ambiance and deal with the smell issue, but he might shower too just so his oily skin and hair doesn't catch fire.
  4. LightWolf

    LightWolf lightwoof
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    I thought we all agreed on Drizzle+Stench being added to Aldaron's Proposal.
  5. Eo Ut Mortus

    Eo Ut Mortus Elodin Smells
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    Phil has admitted he can't risk going one day without his fix of fellatio, so I say we confiscate his washcloth until he agrees to use it for more than just his manhood.
  6. Chou Toshio

    Chou Toshio @Fighting Necktie
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    meh, fellatio is over rated
  7. Deck Knight

    Deck Knight A Knight for the Aegis
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    1. Invite him to a wet t-shirt contest
    2. Douse him with the hose
    3. XXXX
    4. PROFIT! (And also no stinky Phil)
  8. Philip7086

    Philip7086 Myuu
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    I'm clean as (a) whistle.
  9. mingot

    mingot free agent
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    uh, he said giving, not receiving.

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