I Nidoking for this team

So after playing with a rain team for a couple of weeks, I finally got bored of it and decided to make another team. It would be gimmicky but at the same time competitive. My love for first gen sparked the gimmick; I would work with nothing but first gen Pokemon, but try to make them compatible with each other and viable for OU play. It's a team of 5 UUs and 1 NU (Or 3 UUs, 2 OUs and an NU, depending on where you play).

I tested out the team for a little bit, not knowing that I would soon get into an epic battle that I felt the need to share with you all. Again, this is a new team and I'm still trying to figure out how to play it perfectly, and work on its weaknesses.

Here's a replay:

http://pokemon.aesoft.org/replay-Picknicker-Judy-vs-DrBug--2011-11-28

My team (Picknicker Judy)


His team (DrBug)



Battle between Picknicker Judy and DrBug started!


Tier: Wifi OU
Mode Singles
Variation: +24, -8
Rule: Rated
Rule: Sleep Clause
Rule: Species Clause
Rule: Wifi Battle
Yourteam Mew / Machamp / Chansey / Slowbro / Nidoking / Magneton
Opponent'steam Rotom-W / Scizor / Gengar / Landorus / Tyranitar / Infernape
Picknicker Judy sent out Mew!
DrBug sent out Panferno (Infernape)!


100%
100%

I decide to make my first misplay of the game on the very first turn. This Mew is running both Stealth Rock and Taunt. I SHOULD'VE put up Stealth Rocks here, but for some stupid reason I thought that this thing was going to put up his own Stealth Rocks, so like an idiot, I taunt him. Turns out he didn't set up Stealth Rock after all (I'm just as surprised as you are). He U-turned, which I honestly should've expected 100%.


Turn 1

The foe's Panferno used U-turn!
It's super-effective! Mew lost 52% of its health!
The foe's Panferno is hurt by its life orb!
DrBug called Panferno back!
DrBug sent out Despotar (Tyranitar)!
The foe's Despotar's Sand Stream whipped up a sandstorm!

Mew used Taunt!
The foe's Despotar fell for the taunt!
The sandstorm rages!
Mew is buffeted by the sandstorm!


41%
100%


What a great start to the match. I just taunted an offensive Pokemon, essentially wasting a turn, and now I have weather to deal with. Since he U-turned into this T-tar, he obviously has a plan for the Mew. I guess he was either Scarfed or was hoping to wall a specially offensive Mew. Unfortunately for him, this Mew has Superpower and is EVd to 1HKO Tyranitar with it. It would suck if he's scarfed, but the opportunity to 1HKO this thing right off the bat is too good to pass up.


Turn 2

DrBug called Despotar back!
DrBug sent out Rotom-W!


Wait, what? I'm sorry, why did you U-turn into a Tyranitar if you were just going to switch AGAIN without doing anything? Maybe he was overpredicting and thought he'd make a pro double switch? No, sorry, you're getting a Superpower to tha face to tha face.


Mew used Superpower!
The foe's Rotom-W lost 44% of its health!
Mew's Attack fell!
Mew's Defense fell!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Mew is buffeted by the sandstorm!


35%
49%


Yeah, that's right. Can't like that too much, can you? Especially with residual Sandstorm damage. But yeah, I'm definitely switching out this Mew now. I won't be able to KO it with the moves I have, and it will definitely KO me. I switch into Chansey because it'll sponge anything it tosses, and I'd love to get Mew healthy again.


Turn 3

Picknicker Judy called Mew back!
Picknicker Judy sent out Chansey!

The foe's Rotom-W used Shadow Ball!
It had no effect!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Chansey is buffeted by the sandstorm!


93%
43%


Shadow Ball?? Well, that's a pleasant surprise. I was expecting Thunderbolt or Volt Switch. I'd take minimal damage either way. Obvious Gengar switch-in is very obvious, so I take the time Wish up and heal Mew, because Chansey can't do anything else useful against Gengar.


Turn 4

DrBug called Rotom-W back!
DrBug sent out Gengar!

Chansey used Wish!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Gengar is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Chansey is buffeted by the sandstorm!


87%
93%


Yup, just as expected. Sup, Gengar? I won't be here for very long. I decide to heal Mew because his health is super low and he'll serve as death fodder anyway (Half his team is faster than me, including BP Scizor) so I might as well heal it up and give it a fighting chance. I'm predicting a Focus Blast here. I'm hoping for either a miss or for Mew to handle it well enough to live.


Turn 5

Picknicker Judy called Chansey back!
Picknicker Judy sent out Mew!

The foe's Gengar used Focus Blast!
It's not very effective... Mew lost 28% of its health!
The foe's Gengar is hurt by its life orb!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Gengar is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Mew is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Chansey's wish came true!


94%
76%


Boom! Mew, all fresh and new. Unfortunately, this team is weak to Gengar, so I don't feel comfortable switching into anything at the moment, especially at the risk of him getting a free sub up. This Mew is packing Dark Pulse (recently replaced it with Shadow Claw, since it has attack EVs), so it can hit Gengar hard before inevitably dying.


Turn 6

The foe's Gengar used Destiny Bond!
The foe's Gengar is trying to take its foe with it!

Mew used Dark Pulse!
It's super-effective! The foe's Gengar lost 61% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Gengar is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Mew is buffeted by the sandstorm!


88%
9%


At first I really questioned that Destiny Bond move, but I later found sense in it. Maybe he didn't think Shadow Ball would 1HKO and wanted insurance. Idk. Anyway, my plan is to just stay in and hammer him until either one of us die.


Turn 7

The foe's Gengar used Shadow Ball!
It's super-effective! A critical hit! Mew lost 88% of its health!
Mew fainted!
The foe's Gengar is hurt by its life orb!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Gengar is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Gengar fainted!

Score is 5-5


Unfortunately the damage calc I use is down for me, and every other damage calc sucks, so I won't know for a while if that crit would have mattered or not. I call in my Nidoking, because it's my best attacker, and it can 1HKO 3 of his remaining 5 pokes, and outspeed thanks to the scarf I have on it.

Picknicker Judy sent out Nidoking!
DrBug sent out Panferno (Infernape)!


100%
90%


Perfect! Here's one of the three. This Infernape thinks it can outspeed and power through me? You're about to get disappointed, chump.


Turn 8

Nidoking used Earth Power!
It's super-effective! The foe's Panferno lost 90% of its health!
The foe's Panferno fainted!
The sandstorm rages!

Score is 5-4


Awesome! Thank you Infernape, for providing Nidoking with one of the cleanest 1HKOs it'll ever see. Cat's out of the bag though, he knows I'm scarfed, thus locked into Earth Power, so no doubt Landorus is gonna come out to play.



DrBug sent out Demeteros (Landorus)!


Yerp, there he is! Gotta get out of there. I switch into Slowbro to tank his attack, but it turns out to do 38%, which kinda sucks. I guess Landorus + Sandstorm is just that powerful.


Turn 9

Picknicker Judy called Nidoking back!
Picknicker Judy sent out Slowbro!

The foe's Demeteros used Earthquake!
Slowbro lost 38% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!


62%
100%


I find myself in a difficult spot. If I do something other than Slack Off, Slowbro dies. My only option is to stall him out and hope he doesn't get a crit, because nothing on my team likes taking an EQ.


Turn 10

DrBug called Demeteros back!
DrBug sent out Scherox (Scizor)!

Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!


100%
100%


I breathed a sigh of relief. I guess he saw the stall war coming and couldn't be bothered to engage in it. This Scizor kinda sucks for me, it's gonna U-turn, so switching out isn't exactly an option. I go for a Scald here because nothing on his team really enjoys taking a Scald and a burn.


Turn 11

The foe's Scherox used U-turn!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 47% of its health!
DrBug called Scherox back!
DrBug sent out Demeteros (Landorus)!

Slowbro used Scald!
It's super-effective! The foe's Demeteros lost 56% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!


46%
44%

Hell yes! Now I can just Slack off and gradually regain my health while he EQ spams me...right?


Turn 12

The foe's Demeteros used U-turn!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 25% of its health!
DrBug called Demeteros back!
DrBug sent out Rotom-W!

Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!


71%
36%


Errrr, I guess not... oh well, better for me. More health to recover, and Chansey gets a free switch-in!


Turn 13

Picknicker Judy called Slowbro back!
Picknicker Judy sent out Chansey!


The foe's Rotom-W used Shadow Ball!
It had no effect!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Chansey is buffeted by the sandstorm!


81%
30%


Predicting the switch, I take the opportunity to wish up and get Slowbro to 100%. Probably wasn't the best move, I probably should've gone for a Toxic, but I didn't want to risk wasting another turn, because a perfectly healthy Scizor can switch in at any time. Seismic Toss would've been a good option too since Gengar was out. I just wanted to play it safe and keep the team as healthy as possible.


Turn 14

DrBug called Rotom-W back!
DrBug sent out Despotar (Tyranitar)!


Chansey used Wish!
The sandstorm rages!
Chansey is buffeted by the sandstorm!


T-tar switch? No biggie. Hopefully Slowbro can come in here and he won't Crunch me. Even if he does, Wish will get me back up to 100% anyway, and I can status this thing.


Turn 15

Picknicker Judy called Chansey back!
Picknicker Judy sent out Slowbro!


The foe's Despotar used Thunderbolt!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 41% of its health!
Slowbro was paralyzed!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Chansey's wish came true!


100% PAR
100%


Fffffuuuu, Thunderbolt!? Ffffuuuu, parahax!? BS! What Tyranitar packs Thunderbolt? God, this sucks. Slowbro won't lose out on speed, but 25% chance of not doing anything is terrible. I gotta hope to land this Toxic.


Turn 16

The foe's Despotar used Thunderbolt!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 36% of its health!
Slowbro is paralyzed! It can't move!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!


64% PAR
100%


...Or not. Must...hit...with Toxic!


Turn 17

The foe's Despotar used Thunderbolt!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 38% of its health!
Slowbro used Toxic!
The foe's Despotar was badly poisoned!

The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Despotar is hurt by poison!


26% PAR
93%


Well done Slowpro, time to get you out of there. Hopefully Chansey will get the opportunity to bail you out again. And good news, she's got Heal Bell! Hey Tyranitar, wanna try another Thunderbolt? Nidoking wants to come in.

That Toxic turned out to be very important later on in the match, btw.


Turn 18

Picknicker Judy called Slowbro back!
Picknicker Judy sent out Nidoking!

The foe's Despotar used Thunderbolt!
It had no effect!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Despotar restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Despotar is hurt by poison!


100%
87%


Nothing on my move list will hurt Tyranitar more than Earth Power. Unfortunately though, this might mean he switches into Landorus. I want to take that risk though. I want to hurt this thing. I want to rip its head off and bring it back to my village and mount it on my wall in the name of victory. Screw it, let's do it, Nidoking! Come on Tyranitar, fight me mano a mano! Don't run away!


Turn 19

DrBug called Despotar back!
DrBug sent out Demeteros (Landorus)!


Nidoking used Earth Power!
It had no effect!
The sandstorm rages!


.....Wuss. Well, I'm screwed. >.< There's nothing on this team that likes taking a Sandstorm Earthquake. Slowbro is in no position to fight, but I feel like I can still use him in the future, so I don't want to fodder him. Since Tyranitar has been poisoned, Machamp is less of an asset for me in this battle than ever. Sorry, champ, you gotta be the sacrificial lamb. There's no other way.


Turn 20

Picknicker Judy called Nidoking back!
Picknicker Judy sent out Machamp!
The foe's Demeteros used Earthquake!
Machamp lost 77% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Machamp is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Machamp restored a little HP using its Leftovers!


Turn 21

The foe's Demeteros used Earthquake!
Machamp lost 22% of its health!
Machamp fainted!

Score is 4-4


The sandstorm rages!
Picknicker Judy sent out Nidoking!


100%
43%


Please don't be scarfed please don't be scarfed please don't be scarfed


Turn 22

Nidoking used Ice Beam!
It's super-effective! The foe's Demeteros lost 43% of its health!
The foe's Demeteros fainted!
The sandstorm rages!
DrBug sent out Rotom-W!

Score is 4-3


100%
30%


Good. The biggest threat on his team is gone. And since Rotom is here, this is the best opportunity to switch into Chansey and help heal poor Slowpro.


Turn 23

Picknicker Judy called Nidoking back!
Picknicker Judy sent out Chansey!
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
Chansey lost 18% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Chansey is buffeted by the sandstorm!


50%
23%


Yikes! Down to 50%? No big deal. You can sponge all of his attacks and get the Wish off easy.


Turn 24

The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
Chansey lost 15% of its health!

Chansey used Wish!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Chansey is buffeted by the sandstorm!


29%
17%


Ha ha, silly Rotom. I laugh at your futile attempts to hurt this Chansey. In the next turn, I'll be back up to over 50% and successfully stall you out. Sorry, Slowpro. The plan was to get you healthy, but Chansey's well being comes first.


Turn 25

The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
A critical hit! Chansey lost 28% of its health!
Chansey fainted!

Score is 3-3



The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!


I'm not English, but what the bloody hell was that?! Are you serious!? BS hax! F U game! I was about to Heal Bell to cure Slowpro's paralysis, then Wish and switch out to him... crap. This sucks. Well, might as well get Slowbro out here, clean up Rotom and fodder it. He won't be of much use to me anymore now that Landorus is gone anyway.


Turn 26

DrBug called Rotom-W back!
DrBug sent out Scherox (Scizor)!

Slowbro used Psychic!
It's not very effective... The foe's Scherox lost 17% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!


58% PAR
83%


Bah, go away Scizor. Can't you see I was trying to KO your teammate? I went for a Scald here, again foddering it and just hoping to hit something one last time before dying. I should be able to barely live a U-Turn, anyway. Last time it only did about 50%.


Turn 27

The foe's Scherox used U-turn!
It's super-effective! A critical hit! Slowbro lost 58% of its health!
Slowbro fainted!

Score is 2-3


Aaand another crit >.< which probably would have mattered


DrBug called Scherox back!
DrBug sent out Rotom-W!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Picknicker Judy sent out Magneton!


100%
5%


I guess he wants to fodder his Rotom-W now. Can't take the risk of Rotom-W being scarfed and 1HKOing Nidoking with Hydro Pump, so I gotta send out Magneton here. The plan is to sub, let sandstorm finish Rotom-W, and just try to whittle down Tyranitar as much as I can for Nidoking to make the last stand.. Fingers crossed that Magneton lives a Hydro Pump with more than 25% left, or I lose. >.<


Turn 28

The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
Magneton lost 57% of its health!

Magneton used Substitute!
Magneton made a substitute!


Way to take it like a champ, Magnebro! Now the sub is up for the incoming Tyranitar. Whether I win or not depends on how much damage I can do to Tyranitar before dying.


The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W fainted!

Score is 2-2


DrBug sent out Despotar (Tyranitar)!


18% SUB
87% TOX


Spam T-bolt. It's running Hidden Power Fire and Volt Switch, T-bolt will hit the hardest.


Turn 29

Magneton used Thunderbolt!
The foe's Despotar lost 20% of its health!

The foe's Despotar used Ice Beam!
It's not very effective... Magneton's substitute took the damage!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Despotar restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Despotar is hurt by poison!


18% SUB
67% TOX


Yes! 67% left, Toxic damage adding up and I'm still behind a sub. We can do this!


Turn 30

Magneton used Thunderbolt!
The foe's Despotar lost 17% of its health!

The foe's Despotar used Flamethrower!
It's super-effective! Magneton's substitute faded!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Despotar restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Despotar is hurt by poison!


18%
43% TOX


Hold up, you had Flamethrower?! Wow, that's pretty huge. I guess we're even for that critical hit you landed on Chansey.


Turn 31

Magneton used Thunderbolt!
The foe's Despotar lost 18% of its health!

The foe's Despotar used Flamethrower!
It's super-effective! Magneton lost 17% of its health!
Magneton fainted!

Score is 1-2


The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Despotar restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Despotar is hurt by poison!
Picknicker Judy sent out Nidoking!


100%
13% TOX


This is it. Nidoking vs Tyranitar and Scizor. In order for me to have any shot whatsoever at winning this game, I need to lock myself into Flamethrower. If I choose any other move, Scizor beats me with Bullet Punch. Tyranitar is low in health, I can take 13% off, right?


Turn 32

Nidoking used Flamethrower!
It's not very effective... The foe's Despotar lost 8% of its health!

The foe's Despotar used Ice Beam!
It's super-effective! Nidoking lost 50% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Despotar restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Despotar is hurt by poison!
The foe's Despotar fainted!

Score is 1-1


DrBug sent out Scherox (Scizor)!


50%
82%


...No. Crap crap crap. I did not want that Tyranitar putting damage on me. Now my victory isn't assured.

This is it, the moment of truth. Nidoking needs to live a Bullet Punch. If he doesn't, all hope is lost. If he does, Scizor's about to get toasted to a crisp and glorious victory will be mine. All my hopes, all my dreams. All my wet dreams. All my desires, all my goals, all my children, are hoping, are praying, for Nidoking to tough out just one more hit. Just one more, Nidoking!



Turn 33

The foe's Scherox used Bullet Punch!
Nidoking lost 47% of its health!


YES


Nidoking used Flamethrower!
It's super-effective! The foe's Scherox lost 82% of its health!
The foe's Scherox fainted!
Picknicker Judy won the battle!


3%


Props:

- To Nidoking, for taking out 5 of 6 Pokemon and living with 3% to end the battle, like a boss.
- To the battle, for being so back-and-forth the whole way through.
- To Slowbro, for getting the key Toxic off that greatly assisted in winning the game.
- To my opponent having unorthodox movesets for some Pokemon, I admire the creativity.

Slops:

- To Mew (me), for not getting Stealth Rock up at the beginning of the game >.<
- To Machamp, for being a useless piece of shoot in the battle, and in my team in general.
- To hax. I got none in this battle, and he got lotz.
- To misplays on both ends. Seriously, your T-tar had Flamethrower and a Magneton was out! And why couldn't I have just gotten Stealth Rocks up!!



Thanks for watching ladies and gents, hope you enjoyed. Tell me how I did.

 
Not bad at all, I like your commentary and unusual team. Of course a lot of people will complain about the hax and misplays, but that's never bothered me in the past. I don't really understand why hax and misplays are so frowned upon in warstories; they often add character, that bit of unpredictability and realism. Hax and misplays ARE the damn metagame. Unless things are horribly unbalanced, they can really add to a battle in my opinion.

Anyway, my little rant aside, I enjoyed reading your warstory and hope to hear from you in the future. Format was very good, the commentary entertaining and informative without being repetitive, and the battle suitably contested and interesting. Well done!
 
Hey there! I really enjoyed reading your warstory =3 , I can tell you put a lot of effort into the commentary and yea there was a bit of hax but let's face it, it's Pokemon, and anyway sometimes hax makes the game more unpredictable and exciting!

Overall goodjob!!!

ps. I like your team =)
 

Stratos

Banned deucer.
loved the line "please dont be scarfed please dont be scarfed please dont be scarfed." simple and elegant.

this is what i look for in a warstory, it was good. the reason he Beamed is because he figured you would switch to Nido on the Lamethrower, Earth Power him dead, and kill Scizor with magneton, at least that's what I think.
 
loved the line "please dont be scarfed please dont be scarfed please dont be scarfed." simple and elegant.

this is what i look for in a warstory, it was good. the reason he Beamed is because he figured you would switch to Nido on the Lamethrower, Earth Power him dead, and kill Scizor with magneton, at least that's what I think.
Yeah, that could be it. Good point.


And thanks for the feedback, guys. Glad you enjoyed it. I certainly had fun doing it. For you gamers who started with RBY, try making a 1st gen team! I promise you'll have a lot of fun.
 

Texas Cloverleaf

This user has a custom title
is a Social Media Contributor Alumnusis a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Community Contributor Alumnusis a Tiering Contributor Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnusis a Battle Simulator Moderator Alumnus
Would read again. Some misplays and hax but they didnt particularly damage the warstory outside of some comments you'll get saying pick a better battle.
 
Wasn't great; a few misplays and your opponent wasn't that good, there were obvious switches that he should have predicted, and the hax was too much for a warstory in my book too. But aside from that, I did quite enjoy it and I liked your team
 
7/10

The battle was not the best to fully show the skill of both you and your team. There were quite a few misplays on your opponents side (like with the ape) that kind of makes the battle not so even sided.

But otherwise good job.
 
I was a little bit confused with your play/commentary on Slowbro... You never seemed to factor regenerator into your thoughts, and also seemed to think it would the battle against landorus when landorus was only doing 38% with its earthquakes. Fun battle to read
 

BTzz

spams overhand rights
is a Contributor Alumnus
Nice warstory. I really liked the easy to read format and the commentary was pretty good. The battle wasn't the best though. Sure it was close, but it didn't really feature any crucial predictions, double switches etc. Overall really good job :)
 
I was a little bit confused with your play/commentary on Slowbro... You never seemed to factor regenerator into your thoughts, and also seemed to think it would the battle against landorus when landorus was only doing 38% with its earthquakes. Fun battle to read
Yeah I've never used any Pokes on this team before, I'm still getting used to them. Completely forgot Slowbro had regenerator at the time. Still have trouble remembering it.



And yeah guys, it wasn't the best battle in the world. I'm not very good at battling in general. I just liked it because it was really close.
 
"please dont be scarfed, please dont be scarfed, please dont be scared"

Nuff said.

Over all, I will give you a 9/10. The warstory was funny and exciting to read, and you made good plays. Hax happens in every game, so that was fine. The only thing I'm nitpicking are the misplays here and there. But you did a great job!
 
It was a good warstory but I didnt like lines like
That Toxic turned out to be very important later on in the match, btw.
I switch into Slowbro to tank his attack, but it turns out to do 38%, which kinda sucks

For me, you're simply ruining the warstory, I want you to hook me in keep me guessing as too whether that toxic actually does something, if it does, great let me find out, if it doesnt then it doesnt, yet when I read that (That Toxic turned out to be very important later on in the match, btw.) suddenly alarm bells flash saying 'he won the match thanks too toxic' which kills the point of a warstory.

Aside from that it was aesthetically pleasing, with nice formatting and the commentary was good, aside from the spoilers.

7/10
 
It was a good warstory but I didnt like lines like
That Toxic turned out to be very important later on in the match, btw.
I switch into Slowbro to tank his attack, but it turns out to do 38%, which kinda sucks

For me, you're simply ruining the warstory, I want you to hook me in keep me guessing as too whether that toxic actually does something, if it does, great let me find out, if it doesnt then it doesnt, yet when I read that (That Toxic turned out to be very important later on in the match, btw.) suddenly alarm bells flash saying 'he won the match thanks too toxic' which kills the point of a warstory.

Aside from that it was aesthetically pleasing, with nice formatting and the commentary was good, aside from the spoilers.

7/10
Good point, thanks. I'll be sure to try and steer clear of spoilers if I decide to make another war story. Wasn't my intention, just didn't think too much when typing those bits. XD
 
Good warstory if nothing else, but I think once Gengar was at 8%, you could have stalled him to death by swapping to Chansey then something else. IIRC Destiny Bond doesn't trigger unless you make the killing blow.

8/10
 

Users Who Are Viewing This Thread (Users: 1, Guests: 0)

Top