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itt post inappropriate pick-up lines

Discussion in 'Congregation of the Masses' started by Alan, Nov 27, 2011.

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  1. Alan

    Alan

    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2010
    Messages:
    2,812
    I'll start

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    We're having sex
    because I'm stronger than you.

    "How would you like to be a single mother?"

    Your turn.
  2. BenVdd

    BenVdd

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    87
    haha that one is amazing.

    "Whats up"
    girl: not much u
    "rub my pants and find out"


    lame... sorry
  3. BurningMan

    BurningMan fueled by beer

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2009
    Messages:
    1,246
    Does that smell like chloroform to you?
  4. Zacchaeus

    Zacchaeus
    is a Battle Server Moderator Alumnus

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2009
    Messages:
    3,257
    You're like a championship bass, I don't know if I should mount you or eat you.

    Is there a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see me in your pants.

    Your clothes would look great in a crumpled pile on my bedroom floor.

    [Lick your finger and touch her shirt] Now let's get you out of those wet clothes

    [Beckon to her with one finger] If I made you come with one finger, imagine what I can do with the other nine
  5. muffinhead

    muffinhead b202 wifi vgc
    is a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnus

    Joined:
    Mar 6, 2010
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    933
    if i were to ask you on a date, would your answer to that be the same as the answer to this question?

    if i told you that you have a hot body, would you hold it against me?
  6. askaninjask

    askaninjask [FLAIL ARMS]
    is a Forum Moderator
    Moderator

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2009
    Messages:
    1,604
    genius
  7. SalTheThief

    SalTheThief

    Joined:
    Apr 30, 2010
    Messages:
    343
    those are some nice shoes do you want to have sex?
  8. BiGGiE

    BiGGiE champ
    is a Battle Server Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2010
    Messages:
    1,204
    Guy: "Hey girl, do you have any (ethnicity) in you?"
    Girl: "No."
    Guy: "Want some?"

    Guy: "You know what my favorite bone in your body is?"
    Girl: "Which?"
    Guy: "Mine."
  9. macle

    macle FREE STEELEDGES
    is a Tutoris a member of the Site Staffis an Artistis a Forum Moderatoris a Tiering Contributoris a Contributor to Smogonis a Smogon Media Contributoris a Smogon Social Media Contributor Alumnusis a Battle Server Moderator Alumnus
    Little Cup Co-Leader

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    4,352
    abracadabra
  10. Glen

    Glen
    is a Forum Moderator Alumnus

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    if i could rearrange the alphabet i'd put your sister and i together
  11. Chill Murray

    Chill Murray get well soon jacoby..

    Joined:
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    2,453
  12. ala

    ala
    is a Tiering Contributor Alumnusis a Past SPL Winner

    Joined:
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    4,017
    "can I buy you a drink?"

    I know I know I'm a sick fuck...
  13. Colonel M

    Colonel M JESUS BIRD HAS RETURNED
    is a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnus

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    Can I put my treasure in your chest?
  14. verbatim

    verbatim The costume fits Just a little too tight
    is a Battle Server Administratoris a Forum Moderator
    Moderator

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    Show Hide
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]


    I need to try this.
  15. Stylish Interval

    Stylish Interval

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2009
    Messages:
    921
    I’m a necrophiliac. How well do you play dead?

    Is your father in jail? Cause if I was your father, I'd be in jail. (funniest one I've heard)

    I'd call heaven and tell them they lost an angel but I'm kinda hoping you're a slut.
  16. Trax

    Trax

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2005
    Messages:
    2,286
    Hi, my name is <name> would you ever consider having sex with me?
  17. Mysterious Trainer

    Mysterious Trainer

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2011
    Messages:
    174
    "I think I need a Paralyze Heal, because you're stunning."

    "I'd like to get in your rock tunnel."

    "You make my Darkrai rise."

    "Those are some nice Hoothoots you got there."

    "STD’s are like Pokemon baby, gotta catch ‘em all! Wanna help me out?"

    "I wish I was a Seaking, so I could Horn Drill you."

    "I think we're going to need Defog (HM05) before the night is done."

    "My Typhlosion knows Eruption."

    "Are you from the Hoenn Region? 'Cause you're the only HO I see."

    "I heard Meowth's not the only naughty pussy in town."

    "My Metapod is pretty weak. Let's battle so it can get some experience."

    "Do you have a Ditto in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants." (Sorry, Zacchaeus)

    "Do you come to the Viridian Forest often? Because I just want to Pikachu."
    Asuya likes this.
  18. RODAN

    RODAN you're gonna die young and go to hell
    is a Smogon IRC AOPis a Forum Moderatoris a Smogon Media Contributor
    SuperCuckoldingModlord Zimbabwe

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    "hi im mysterious trainer"
  19. kd24

    kd24 Will you share your blood with me?
    is a Pokemon Researcheris a Site Staff Alumnusis a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Smogon IRC SOp Alumnusis a Tiering Contributor Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnusis a Battle Server Moderator Alumnus

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    hey rodan ;), heard you were looking for a stud, well i got the std and all i need is u ;)
  20. bearsfan092

    bearsfan092

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    This is amazing.
  21. Alchemator

    Alchemator my god if you don't have an iced tea for me when i
    is a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus

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    "Hi I'm RODAN, I HAVE BEEN VERY NAUGHTY THIS YEAR"
  22. Xaqwais

    Xaqwais

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    1,719
    Are you Irish? 'Cause my penis is Dublin.
  23. Fishy

    Fishy

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2008
    Messages:
    3,222
    i promise i don't bite, but i wanna will-o-whisper sweet nothings into your ear

    ooooh it seems like my hydro pump got caught in your storm drain

    is it me or did I just trace your sap sipper?
  24. gk

    gk mighty
    is a Smogon IRC AOp Alumnusis a Forum Moderator Alumnus

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    hi, does anyone else know you are here tonight
    Harsha and yondie like this.
  25. NatGeo

    NatGeo I'M IN YOUR AREA
    is a Contributor Alumnus

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    do you have a mirror in your pocket because i see myself in your pants

    yeah i got nothin
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