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My very own Pokemon legend is about to unfold!

Discussion in 'Smogon's Greatest Hits' started by Mekkah, Nov 8, 2007.

  1. Mekkah

    Mekkah
    is a Super Moderatoris a Tutor Alumnusis a Site Staff Alumnusis a Smogon IRC SOp Alumnusis a CAP Contributor Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnusis an Administrator Alumnus
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    YES! Finally, I, MEKKAH, turned 12. Time to be sent out alone on a dangerous Pokemon journey. After asking my mom 8000 times, finally I was allowed to go! However, not before I asked the help of a professional...or maybe it was professor. I don't know. Anyways, I remember something about him...I met him before. Let me dig it up in my memory, his name was...

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    That's right, his name was Jumpman16, the Pokemon Professor! He would always tell me how people called him names like "nerd" and "nerd" and "nerd" and stuff, a very bad childhood he had. However, he would teach me all I needed to know! Except for the sexual stuff, of course - I learned that from my mother. Heck, with her lessons, I could arouse ANYTHING, including my computer!

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    I went downstairs, ready to embark on my quest. I caught mom downstairs, drinking her sadness away because she couldn't get a boyfriend for longer than a week.

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    Poor CrazyStarwolf. :( Now, the woman outside, she was rather good looking! I asked her if she wasn't worried about getting pregnant with all the boys she'd be attracting, but she said her condoms were...

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    Okay, enough with the dirty subjects. It was time to look for the professionalor. He lives next door to me, which is also the home of that guy I've been bickering with ever since I was babies. Not ONCE would he cut the boys in town a little slack. ALWAYS stealing my toys and calling us names. I shuddered as I read the sign outside of his house, which was barely readable because he wrote on it himself.

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    Yeah, looks like Hazerider didn't have enough space. After more scary moments, I just went into his house, praying I would avoid him. Inside, I met his rather nice looking mom, who told me Hazerider was doing something unusual.

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    That's odd, that guy couldn't get anyone to go out with to save his life. Anyway, the professionalrizer wasn't there either, so I asked this fat guy outside of the big house if he'd seen him. Unfortunately, the guy even had trouble memorizing Pokemon and item names.

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    "And recall items and Pokemon as if they're that easy to remember!" Yeah, I'm sure that must be hard, as well as remembering you shouldn't double post and post without content and make dumb smileys and generally be an asshole. I left toy where he stood and went to the north to see if the provokeranal was out of town. But then...

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    (Jumpman's first name is Oak)

    He got all mad at me and went on and on that I shouldn't go through the tall grass because

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    and then concluded to teach me more sexual stuff out of nowhere, namely that I should use condoms, but I quickly snapped at him that I already learned that this morning.

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    Either way, the profile or whatever he's called would help me defend myself against the wild Pokemons, as long as I came along with him.

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    In the big house (which turned out to be a lavatory or something) I was shocked to find my mortal enemy, Hazerider, furiously waiting for Oak Jumpman to arrive. However, in the presence of the old wise processor he didn't dare to do anything, and in the meanwhile the old guy tried to remember who the hell Hazerider was.

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    Yeah, apparently they just assumed the name on the sign near their house was his name. ANYWAY after he remembered we told him that we wanted to go out and catch Pokemon and have an adventure and stuff (I would have more adventures than Hazerid though if you know what I mean!). To do this, we'd need our own Pokemon. He had three REALLY rare ones left that were nowhere else to be found and that are very valuable to him and that he'd give his life for and all...I was prepared to leave his labradory in the knowledge that I'd never be a Pokemon Master, but it seems logic was nowhere to be found as the prodenser said

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    Hazerider got all angry (nothing new here)

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    but Jumpman said he could have one too so it didn't matter. However, since the prodisser forgot who he was, I got to pick first. I looked at the first monster, and I was not satisfied.

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    I then wanted to open the second ball, but Jumpman told me that one was filled w/ squirtle who wasn't good at all, so immediatly I walked to the third Pokeball. It probably didn't contain much, but looks like I had little of a choice!

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    I looked him up on the Pokedex I didn't even have yet, which revealed interesting information.

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    In addition, some random voice out of nowhere and told me I made the right choice.

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    HA! said my nemesis! You did not take Doomsday, the superior choice! He sprinted towards the table, and grabbed the Pokeball.

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    Before he would change his mind, I saved my process.

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    Now that my rival was even with me again, I did not want to remain in one room with him for any longer. I leaped for the exit, but an invisible force blocked my way. Hazerider foresaw my intentions, and knowing the rule of "you cannot decline a POKEMON challenge", he...challenged me!

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    I was unable to escape this. We were surrounded by a black sphere, and before me stood the feared Hazegrinder, ready to attack me. Behind him was a bookshelf with all his favourite toys.

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    We both sent out our prized Pokemon. Legay did, indeed, look very energetic, however, so did Hazerider's choice, Doomsday. I think I underestimated him a bit!

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    Looking at my options, I decided I couldn't but take him on. Good thing Legay the Lexay had several options at his disposal...

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    The second move, HEAVENLY GOLDEN BLAST, looked very promising. I selected it, but then immediatly regretted my decision.

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    Apparently it WAS a very powerful attack, but he could only use this attack in his final form, and Legay doesn't learn Transform until a later level. This early mistake had cost me dearly, as Doomsday proceeded to beat the hell out of poor Lexay. Was I gonna? lose

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    No! Remember, I had MOJO! I had TURNED ON the PC, and received a wonderful POTION in return. I screamed to Legay the Lexay: HERE , LEGAY! It's a POTION if u need one! 3...2....1......

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    The Lexay consumed the potion and was ready for the battle again! Doomsday, however, was tired, and his trainer could not afford the luxury of giving him a potion. The second half of the game was DOMINATED by my (FART) Pokemon.

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    Both of our fierce warriors were down to their last few stamina points, but in the end my friend managed to grasp victory.

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    We celebrated our victory together - after all, it was our TEAMWORK that pulled us through.

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    As expected, Hazerider got mad and blamed something that was his fault anyway.

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    After calling me a coward and a (BAN ME PLEASE), he left the scene, leaving me and my now level 6 Legay to rejoice.

    [​IMG]

    This was the beginning of a great and long POKEMON adventure!
  2. Carl

    Carl or Varl
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    at least you picked bulbasaur
  3. dak

    dak

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    good thread
    gz for 8k!
  4. norulz

    norulz excellent

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    good read, congratulations
  5. The.Lost.Hylian

    The.Lost.Hylian I'll have what you're drinking
    is a Researcher Alumnus

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    Fuck you and your 8k asshole.

    But besides that, I find this to be the most enjoyable thread in a long time.
  6. Omega Zero

    Omega Zero

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    I do enjoy.:justin:
  7. Cerivious

    Cerivious

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    Second picture was the best of the bunch imo.
    Awesomely hilarious story
  8. Atlas

    Atlas I'm the Mary!
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    this thread makes me want to take a poop
  9. Lawman

    Lawman

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    congrats, great post XD
  10. monkfish

    monkfish what are birds?
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    i enjoyed your adventure, happy 8k
  11. cookie

    cookie Adominnustrata
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    hehe i loled, congratulation on 8k. the battle menu was good

    EDIT: lol hagrider
  12. Synre

    Synre
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    gj


    i expect the rest of the game done one town at a time daily


    perhaps in your 9k next week?
  13. Clicky Pen

    Clicky Pen

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    i rate this a 3/5 doomsday is the superior choice

    also congrats on a damn good topic and 8k
  14. Aeroblacktyl

    Aeroblacktyl The pizza doesn't scream in the oven! LOL!
    is a Tutor Alumnusis a Tournament Director Alumnusis a Site Staff Alumnusis a Team Rater Alumnusis a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Tiering Contributor Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnusis a Battle Server Moderator Alumnusis a Past SPL + WCoP Winner

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    can't wait til you can surf and dupicate rare candies ^_^
  15. chaos

    chaos
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    Owner

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    wanna race to 10k
  16. Altmer

    Altmer rid this world of human waste
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    so who's the boss of team rocket

    amazing thread by the way, it would teach the basics of pokemon to nooblets like DM
  17. Doomsday

    Doomsday
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    DM would have to be careful not to choose DOOMSDAY, else he'd have a nasty time trying to defeat the WATER-type GYM LEADER, MISTY.

    im just sayin i lost because HAZERID is dumb and his orders didn't make any sentence

    good job i laughed at this thread
  18. Pneuma

    Pneuma

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    good stuff
    happy 8k
  19. Sir Spanky

    Sir Spanky

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    grats on the crazy-high postcount lol
  20. Max

    Max yadig
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    lol. Congrats on the 8k, Mekkah. :)
  21. QuickDraw

    QuickDraw

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    8000 posts and your pokemon journey is just starting? congratul...no

    funny as hell though
  22. GTS

    GTS

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    Awesome! I loved reading this!
  23. Yuri

    Yuri

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    Hahahah!! I wish I could be this funny in english.
  24. theamericandream38

    theamericandream38

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    congrats on 8k, also nice story xD
  25. Hyra

    Hyra
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    wait, is this some long lost memory, or did you wait 8,000 posts to start your journey?

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