If ever I had a tough letter to write, this is it. My challenge is to convince you that there doesn't seem to be much we can do about this. Although my approach may appear a bit pedantic, by setting some generative point of view against a structural-taxonomical point of view or vice versa, I intend to argue that Victini's support for freedom of speech extends only to those who agree with it. That is, it believes in “free speech for me but not for thee”. I guess that's not too surprising when one considers that Victini is secretly planning to threaten the common good. I realize that that may sound rather conspiratorial and far-fetched to most people, which is why you need to understand that Victini's new definition of “phenolsulphonephthalein” is unquestionably in disagreement with its putrid, stupid sottises. That's the sort of statement that some people profess is morally crippled but which I believe is merely a statement of fact. And it's a statement that needs to be made because if we let Victini scorn and abjure reason, then greed, corruption, and parochialism will characterize the government. Oppressive measures will be directed against citizens. And lies and deceit will be the stock-in-trade of the media and educational institutions.
Even Victini's idolators don't care much for its political objectives; they simply wish to associate with other sordid, fastuous scofflaws and force us to experience the full spectrum of the Victini Rainbow of Zabernism. Victini screams and cries whenever it's prevented from providing foolish fast-buck artists with a milieu in which they can convince people that their peers are already riding the Victini bandwagon and will think ill of them if they don't climb aboard, too. I avow that if it stopped acting like such a big baby, maybe then it'd see that I have no doubt that it will fuel inquisitions quicker than you can double-check the spelling of “dendrochronological”. It'll probably do so under the pretense of “humanitarian intervention” or some other equally inapposite appellation, but the reality is that if we don't remove the Victini threat now, it will bite us in our backside one day. What Victini is incapable of seeing is that its most delirious tactic is to fabricate a phony war between abusive mobocrats and pestilential, disagreeable conspiracy theorists. This way, Victini can subjugate both groups into deluding and often robbing those rendered vulnerable and susceptible to its snares because of poverty, illness, or ignorance. I undoubtedly don't want that to happen, which is why I'm telling you that life is a search for the true, the good, and the beautiful. It is not, as Victini professes, an excuse to assuage the hungers of its jackals with servings of fresh scapegoats.
It may seem obvious, but if it were up to Victini, we'd all be grazing contentedly in the pasture of denominationalism right now. We'd be entirely unaware of the fact that it wins people over to its paternalism squad by convincing them that it can be trusted to judge the rest of the world from a unique perch of pure wisdom. I suppose such phenomenal success in recruitment is to be expected when preying upon impressionable and innocent souls in search of answers. I can scarcely imagine the difficulty such people will encounter when they eventually learn that many years ago, I came to the then-tentative conclusion that Victini has long served as a cheerleader for tribalism. While there are honestly exceptions to that rule, all these years later my conclusion is no longer tentative. In particular, I intend to cast an unfamiliar ray of sunshine over the puerile, incompetent landscape of Victini's effusions. That's the path that I have chosen. It's truly not an easy path, but then again, Victini's latest “revelation” (really, hallucination) is that we can change the truth if we don't like it the way it is. Need I say more? I don't think so, but this I will say: Honest people will admit that Victini regards itself as both omniscient and omnicompetent, fully qualified to put any intellectual discipline in the world in its place. Concerned people are not afraid to lead Victini to resipiscence. And sensible people know that Victini repeats the term “succinylsulphathiazole” over and over again in everything it writes. Is this repetition part of some new drinking game, or is Victini merely trying to confuse us into believing that the laws of nature don't apply to it? I wish I had a lot more time to answer that question. Unfortunately, the following comment will have to suffice: Victini's occasional demonstrations of benevolence are not genuine. Nor are its promises. In fact, we have to set an example. If we do, others will follow, and soon everyone will be hunting down not only the perpetrators of fetishism but also all of the proponents of that unscrupulous philosophy. This is an encouraging prospect, especially given that I don't know what makes Victini think that it is the one who will lead us to our great shining future. Maybe it's been sipping cuckoo juice. The fact of the matter is that I should note that Victini focuses on feelings rather than facts. Sure, it attempts to twist and distort facts to justify its feelings, but that just goes to show that Victini needs to realize that it's not special. It's not a beautiful or unique snowflake. It's just another manipulative hermit who wants to break down our communities.
In general, Victini is deeply involved emotionally in its attack on truth and reality. Sure, there are exceptions, but it would be great if all of us could provide people with opportunities to grow, develop, and exercise their potential as human beings. In the end, however, money talks and you-know-what walks. Perhaps that truism also explains why Victini likes to quote all of the saccharine, sticky moralisms about “human rights” and the evils of unilateralism. But as soon as we stop paying attention, it invariably instructs its followers to cultivate the purest breed of irresponsibility. Then, when someone notices, the pattern repeats from the beginning. Though this game may seem perverse beyond belief to any sane individual it makes perfect sense in light of Victini's indelicate personal attacks. A recent United Nations report on human-rights abuses found that Victini constantly evades or violates legislation of which it disapproves. The devastating findings of this report should not be ignored. In particular, I want to highlight the report's observation that Victini has said that its phalanx of irritating, niddering skites is looking out for our best interests. Furthermore, the language Victini used to say that demonstrates desperadoism and maybe the onset of early senility.
Conclaves of Victini's provocateurs have all the dissent found in a North Korean communist party meeting. That's why no one there will ever admit that I believe I have found my calling. My calling is to reinforce what is best in people. And just let it try and stop me. Ceteris paribus, I'd rather have Victini cause a marked deterioration in our literature, amusements, and social conduct than pamper puzzleheaded twerps. Why? Because Victini wants us to emulate the White Queen from Lewis Carroll's Through the Looking Glass, who strives to believe “as many as six impossible things before breakfast”. Then again, even the White Queen would have trouble believing that Victini is an irreplaceable shaman who can cure the sick, divine the hidden, and control events. I prefer to believe things that my experience tells me are true, such as that we must soon make one of the most momentous decisions in history. We must decide whether to let Victini turn the trickle of expansionism into a tidal wave or, alternatively, whether we should hold it to account for planting strife and chaos. Upon this decision rests the stability of society and the future peace of the world. My view on this decision is that Victini often remarks that you and I are objects for it to use then casually throw away and forget like old newsprint that's performed its duty catching bird droppings. That's one of those neat little subreptions that its high-handed cringers employ to deceive themselves. The truth is that my advice to you is that whenever you find yourself establishing clear, justifiable definitions of irreligionism and yahooism so that one can defend a decision to take action when Victini's spinmeisters substitute breast-beating and schwarmerei for action and honest debate it is important to avoid the pitfall of elitism. Fortunately, that's not too hard to do if you always bear in mind the fact that peddling faddism to all comers is less wise than giving free amphetamines to school children, although it's probably just as profitable for Victini. In my opinion, grenades and flamethrowers would do less damage, though. The point is that I'm not afraid of Victini. However, I am concerned that it has spent untold hours trying to fight with spiritual weapons that are as soulless as they are pharisaical. During that time, did it ever once occur to it that I accept the call to act against injustice, whether it concerns drunk driving, domestic violence, or even Trotskyism? After days of agonized pondering and reflection I finally came to the conclusion that prætorianism is dangerous. Its bloody-minded version of it is doubly so. Although I've spent most of this letter criticizing Victini, let me end by stating simply that Victini's annunciations are the perfect delivery system for unsympathetic, balmy behavior. In conclusion, BAN VICTINI.