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Discussion in 'Congregation of the Masses' started by Gabe, Nov 24, 2012.
It was perfect lol, but it seems soo soon.
i feel like the solution to 100% of the problems in this thread is communication
That or more sex.
Just tell him you don't want to go fast nicely. What you don't want to happen is a week from now him expecting sex and you being like "no it's way too early" and he's like "but I kissed you on day 1 and then made out with you on day 3 etc. etc. and you were fine with it!!" The last thing you want is to be forced into something you don't want to be just because you're afraid of telling him to go slowly. If he actually is into you he'll wait a while.
In other news though, grats on the perfect first kiss ;) <3
did you guys end on bad terms or something? there's nothing wrong with becoming friends with your ex after a break up. she could just be trying to amend whatever happened to end your friendship/relationship in the first place. it doesn't necessarily mean she's trying to get back together with you.
did you just decide one day you guys were bf and gf? never heard of someone question what to do when their s/o kisses them.
Well, I know she's not trying to get back together with me because she's now dating the guy she left me for. She keeps saying stuff about being friends again, but I kinda just hate him and don't like what she did to me.
i think the best thing you can do is tell her exactly what you just said to me. explain to her that you're not ready to trust/accept (etc) her friendship after what she did to you. i would try not to mention your resent towards her current bf so that it just stays between you and her. if you believe at some point that there is a chance that you can forgive her and become friends, let her know that. the only other possibility would be to completely ignore her, but depending on the severity of your break up and whether or not that is in your best interest, the choice is yours.
That was surprisingly helpful. Thanks.
Guys, I'm not expert, but I think Chinchou's a guy... or else Ryan (on his profile) can be used as a girl's name...
Doesn't really matter if he's a guy or a girl, advice is still the same :P
That said, Ryan is a pretty common ambiguous-gender name iirc, I've known girls and guys with it.
Based on the fact that Chinchou just started a thread called LGBTQ, and is named Ryan I would assume that he is in fact a gay male, not that it matters.
I'm pretty sure Chou is schizophrenic and is using the chinchou account to explore his sexuality
I just chimed in with everyone using the wrong pronouns and saying bf / gf
If you're still feeling that negativity toward the guy she's dating now, then it's probably way too soon to try to be friends with her. Before one can have a healthy friendship with a person they were intimate with for such a long time, there needs to be a healthy disconnected period where both parties move on with their lives and "get over" the loss of the other. This period can vary depending on the person, but it has been known to take a while (months, even years). In my experience, I've never been able to be close friends with my exes. Even if we ended our relationship on good terms, it's awkward to go back to just a regular friendship. Even now, being married and years after my last breakup, I am still only, at the most, casual "Facebook" friends with a couple of my exes, and we do no more than leave a comment occasionally on a random status.
Honestly, unless your ex and yourself share a very similar sphere of influence and you see each other a lot through your normal routine, it's going to be difficult to maintain any kind of healthy friendship to begin with. Forcing it only leads to more awkwardness.
If you really want to be friends with this girl again, you need to wait until you no longer harbor any feelings of negativity or resentment, toward her OR the guy she's dating. This means cutting off contact COMPLETELY for a while and focusing on other things in your life until those feelings disappear. That being said, and based on what you've told me about the circumstances and her behavior, I don't think this is a person you really want to be friends with. Having a deep relationship with someone for two years, then just dumping them and jumping into another relationship less than a month later is kind of a dick move, and kind of tells me she gave up caring about you long before you two broke up. Her effort to be friends with you again so soon seems like just shallow attempts to placate you and make herself feel less guilty for what she did. It sounds like "charity" to me, something you don't need any part of.
I'd expect you to take my advice with a grain of salt, of course. I have only limited information about your situation, and I am basing my advice off my own experiences and the experiences of people I know and have spoken to about. I hope that you find a resolution to this situation that benefits you and allows you to move forward with your life in a healthy way.
please do not misattribute schizoprenia
nigga u thinkin way 2 hard about dis
hey fuck you did you not notice the literal HUNDREDS of other posts of people saying this? Just cos the internet is full of dumbfuck nineteenyearolds who're like "maybe if I'm really nice to her and never express any interest in dating/fucking at all she'll ask me out!" -> "that dumb slut is holding out on me!" doesn't mean we're all so retarded. actually though how much of this thread has been "I've been friend-zoned!" says random male user, "no you haven't!" chimes in every other user
I knew this guy and a girl who literally spent every day together (that's not hyperbole, it was every day) for several months, slept in the same bed, spooned all the time, were really close, but were so adamant that they were "not dating"
finally they fucked and everything was better for it
lol you guys, I am a male. The correct term is Homosexual Male btw, and i prefer being called that :p Not that it matters but still.
This might seem silly, but a while ago I met a girl on ps (Told you it seems silly) Shes beautiful, and we have so much in common. So we started going out if you can call it that lol, dunno never have done online before. Problem is we are still younger 16 to be exact, not to mention how far she is away. I dunno is it a good idea to continue this and meet up later if it lasts that long? I just need some opinions on this. Could this actualy work out?
Though I did not meet my wife initially online, we did date for over two years (and even got engaged) while living far away from each other. This should tell you that a long distance relationship can work, but it takes a great deal of patience, dedication, and most importantly communication. Now, not to discount your age, but I'd say the chances are slim at best of you maintaining a lasting relationship with this girl. Most times, boys and girls your age simply lack the maturity and development to understand and engage in a meaningful long term relationship. Now of course, this doesn't mean you CAN'T do it, it's just typically not how things turn out.
My advice? If you and her both feel strongly about one another, go for it. Continue to have regular communication, skype, send each other pictures, etc. Long distance relationships have the benefit of forcing couples to develop strong communication with one another rather than get lost in the physical infatuation that tends to dominate in the early stages. This has good implications long term, as proper communication and trust are essential to a stable relationship.
I would caution you, though, to pace yourselves and take things gradually. If an opportunity arises to meet in person or make a visit without one or both of you shelling out a ton of money, jump on it. Don't, however, feel compelled to go out of your way to make something like this happen. If it is meant to be, it will be. Just enjoy each other and your shared interests :). Best of luck!
Haha, I remember my first sexual experience. It was with my at the time girlfriend, Jessica, after we had graduated middle school. Being the young, upstanding, and slightly insecure chap that I once was, I knew that I had to seduce Jessica with a trip to the roller rink and a delicious chocolate malt. Once that portion of the date was executed successfully, she was thoroughly ready to hop in my newly refurbished race car bed so I could take her for a spin. Although during all of the excitement of seducing my partner, I forgot that I'm only 3 inches limp and about 4 inches hard!! I knew it was time to act fast, so I ran downstairs as Jessica pleasured herself and cut off the end of a Hebrew National beef hot dog and stuffed it down my Trojan condom which I bought with my allowance. It was the best sex I've ever had.
This is how you sacrifice for a girl! Take notes gentlemen(myself included)
might as well say what everyone is thinking: you sure it's a girl?
You don't like being called a guy? Or a dude?
Asking seriously, not trolling
Shoulda added that in there lol. Yes I know shes a girl we met through skype before. Just not irl face to face.
Also @WaterBomb Thanks for the advice it really helped.
maybe he meant "homosexual" was more correct than gay?
but that'd be pretty fuckin stupid too so i don't know