<&BKC> pdc do what peachy said
<&BKC> analyses of the games
<&BKC> pls
hi everybody i played telegod today in some cool games and i will be here to commentate on them ahahahahaah
g1: my friend sugarhigh built a team with dragalage that destroyed me like 5 times in testing, i was really intrigued by this team as it looked as if it destroyed 99% of the types of teams tele loves to bring in olt. basically i decided to bring it and it actually worked. early game i tried to get as much damage with altaria off as possible, knowing that altaria was the thane of cawdor and the tele slayer due to it being a fairy type with wings. i was able to get rocks up early game which pressured his talonflame which was cool as well, esp considering he didn't have much room to bring in sableye. i managed to get gliscor in early and kill starmie whcih surprisingly he sacked, although then again i guess he really didn't have another option anyway lol. basically after i killed the starmie i was feeling pretty good as i could keep rocks on the field as long as i didn't allow sableye to come in. tele did a good job following up this sequence with keldeo by pressuring me quite a bit into an unfavorable situation. luckily due to my quick wit and kind words given to me by bloo a few rounds earlier:
[19:04] <bluee> ur a beast
[19:04] <bluee> u got this
i was able to lure telegod into letting his keldeo get in a comfortable position in his eyes in which he can just continue to cm without me being able to status him.
now is when dat shit got tie yo nigga good lord yung bae god tele came thru with the icE plays by healing up lando and curing keldeo of status with wish and heal bell. i was scared as i thot i would lose due to a based god switch but in the end i continued to barrage tele with smart ass plays which were safe and ultimately won in the end, but we'll save that 4 later. i decide to sack my tran which was un-needed due to the innovation supplied to me by sugarhigh and hugo in dragalage which was pretty baller. i was scared when i missed stone edge on that icy prediction but god damn i came back after tele decided to keep his bird in on the ttar.
shabba!
g2: when i saw that team matchup i damn near pissed myself oml i thought the prophecy had come true and tele would now proceed to win g2&3 like always. i started freaking out and sweating my balls off due to the sheer presence of telegod in the opposite side of the room. i got the rocks up real quick then jetted his ass down with an icE hp ice which sent this niggas landorus-t back on a trip back to bw. he then went out to his sableye, whcih i allowed to burn my landorus in order to u-turn into
SLAYER I MEAN diancie, which came thru with a strong moonblast on the starmie. i was then scolded by fellow based player reytaquitoface who told me i should have made the more ballsy played, i took those words to heart and proceeded to finally, once and for all, let my balls drop.
my voice changed and my thin arms began to engulf themselves with muscles. i realized i myself would need to evolve in order to defeat tele in this difficult time. while my latios did shit i managed to switch it up and get my boy analmie starmie in there to beat down tele's team. he sacrificed his talonflame, possibly hoping it would be like fawkes and rise from the ashes to save him.
it did not.
my boy starmie came thru and began to tear tele a new one, just when he thought he had one, i pulled a ctc and surprised tele with the recover. the innovation i used at this time was some that i have never seen before, i then realized why they called ctc the based lord. while he may be a chink, he is indeed a smart asian who had the insight of idm mascot martin luther king jr.
tele began sacking every pokemon on his team in a sudden fit of rage as i came down on him with ciele's favorite pokemon, dieancie. diancie managed to kill a mon every single time, with tele's only hope being protecting multiple times hoping that he would.
but wait
teled managed to show me why they call him telegod with an amazing show of protect stalling during the match, but his clefable's life was sadly ended by a crit, which probably didn't matter anyway since why the fuck would u protect lol.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°)
gg
i would like 2 thank my inspiration 4 winning this game
i would like 2 thank bkc for teaching me ur never too old to fuck somebody in the ass
i would like 2 thank ctc for hopping up outta nowhere and telling me 2 not use togekiss
i would like 2 thank martin luther king for freeing the slaves on this fateful day
i would like 2 thank hugo for ghosting me every single round
i would like 2 thank tesung for that as well
i would like 2 thank leftiez for telling me 2 never give up even when u think ur out
i would like 2 thank xtrashine for telling me "u miss 100% of the shot u don't take"
or maybe it was some poster in my elementary school
now for some inspirational words given to me b4 / during / after the game
+gizmo:for fucks sake miss
@reyscarface:LMAO
+During Summer: pdc
+During Summer: i love you
+Bluwing:ARE U FUCKIN DUMB TELE!!!
+LiberalLucario:why does this clef not have cm
+Piexplode:YOU KNOW IF HE'S BLUFFING
+Haunted.Shadow:
(Private to +PROTECT YOUR NECK) you're my champion!
<&BKC> pdc
<&BKC> what...
<&PDC_> my mother wants me to open plastic bags for her
<&PDC_> jesus christ
<&PDC_> this is why me bo3's always take
<&PDC_> hours
<@dekzeh> wtf
<@dekzeh> whats pdc doing
one last thing
brb have to go have sex with my gf