Admit Your Minor First World Barbaric Urges

[xzern]

none. im normal. for lent i gave up the thrill of the fight

 

[BP]

I have the primal urge to post

 

[Fishy]

when i was little i used to "impress" my friends by wrapping a few dozen strands of hair around my fingers and then ripping it all out

this was like 2nd grade lol

 

[Plague von Karma]

You're in her DMs

I'm under her house stealing copper wire

We are not the same

 

[LadyXBeans]

i want to eat every 2x4 i see

 

[Paulluxx]

COFFEE CREAMER

you know when you wake up at 5:00 AM while living in the Holiday Inn. And you walk out of your room to go to breakfast, and normal people are drinking coffee *vomiting noises*. I see the little cups of coffee creamer, and take them all, they're mine, I put them in my pockets, and then run back into my room, dump them out onto my bed, and then find myself 4 hours later surrounded by Coffee Creamer Containers.

 

[TalIsNotGone]

every time i go up stairs in a non-public place, i climb em on all fours like a creature. but I NEVER go down em on all fours. never again.

some nights i collect every blanket and pillow in my bedroom and spend like 20 minutes perfectly building a little nest of perfect comfort for me to lay down and watch yt videos in until i drift off. this experience has become 800 times better ever since I got a weighted blanket. note to you: GET A WEIGHTED BLANKET.

i growl under my breath sometimes when I'm pissed just because it's a very fun sound to make. honestly, i don't care too much about if people think it's weird, and it's nearly unhearable anyways.

i chew on necklaces and hoodie strings and plastic bags I LOVE PLASTIC BAGS and tassels and. my hair. goddamnit i REALLY need some sorta chew stim necklace or something

sometimes i just. maniacally laugh for no reason. just to practice my evil laugh for when i finally join a comp tournament and win one singular match. /j

there have been three times where i have swallowed coins just because having them in my mouth is fun and every time i pick up a coin i wonder if Now Will Be A Fourth

also one time i drank a couple drops of mango hand sanitizer just to make my gf laugh

 

[Voltage]

When I'm on a run, if I see a chalk-drawn hopscotch court, I MUST complete it with the footwork and everything

 

[antemortem]

i often want to remove all the manhole covers in a metropolitan city

 

[Ur local kangaroo]

Fire/Fighting doesn't deserve the Fire/Fighting typing because it's terrible at fighting fire

 

[Voltage]

After handling raw meat, I REALLY want to lick my fingers, even though i know that if i do, I'd immediate barf

 

[Sijih]

After handling raw meat, I REALLY want to lick my fingers, even though i know that if i do, I'd immediate barf

whenever i work with ground beef i always want to pack it up like a snowball/meatball and throw it at someone

 

[phoopes]

whenever i work with ground beef i always want to pack it up like a snowball/meatball and throw it at someone

you work with ground beef???

cowman confirmed to not be a cow man, just a man that likes cows

 

[Theorymon]

you work with ground beef???

cowman confirmed to not be a cow man, just a man that likes cows

I mean he could always be a cannibal! Or complicit in the eating of his fellow cow!

 

[Oglemi]

Sometimes I just want to put things in the garbage disposal just to hear it annihilate it

 

[Morkal]

Back before I started dieting, I used to eat peanut butter out of a jar with a spoon.

I would clear out a whole jar within two days, just from spoonfuls of peanut butter. These weren't tiny smidge jars either, these were massive jars too.

 

[Martin]

- I slurp and drink soup out of the bowl when it's mostly liquid. Fuck spoons, that shit is slow and easier to spill!

Anyone who says they don't do this is a filthy liar

 

[Fishy]

sometimes i want to slam on the brakes when people are doing that thing where they jaywalk and end up ridiculously close to your car as they intend to pass behind you, just to hear them *thud* and then perhaps consider how stupid & dangerous their decision was

use crosswalks kids

 

[Rugi]

I wanna ship my neighbour's dog to Yulin China

 

[Rugi]

This is technically a second world urge but I hope that dog gets turned into a nice stir-fry it's an absolute piece of shit