I have been thinking and i have been wondering what is the perfect spot for a first date? Dinner dates i feel are very stagnant and closed and uptight. I think the best spot for a date would be a walk along the river front or something of that nature. I just feel that a dinner date shouldn't be the first date that you have because its sooo awkward and can be hard to generate constant conversation for 40+ min. What do you think?
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Dating tips and advice?
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Well apparently you have a different girl every day of the week...if you're looking to date someone that usually isn't a good idea...
In all seriousness, make the date casual, go do something interesting, like ice skating cause it's winter, stuff like that. If she's in your group of friends, hang out as a group, you both get to know each other in a non-awkward setting and then it could lead to dating.
In all seriousness, make the date casual, go do something interesting, like ice skating cause it's winter, stuff like that. If she's in your group of friends, hang out as a group, you both get to know each other in a non-awkward setting and then it could lead to dating.
I figure someone like you would be pretty experienced with first dates... seems like that's as far as you would ever get.
THE_IRON_...KENYAN?
Banned deucer.
He will get farther than a first degree burn, though
The best first date is one that could be construed as either a date or just hanging out depending on how it goes.
Really huge romantic gestures etc. are not good material for a first date; they tend to be experienced by the receiver as intimidating and putting pressure on them rather than thoughtful (when they work, they work big, but in all situations where the person isn't already into you, they discourage subsequent dating). Making the other person comfortable is far more important than sweeping them off their feet with over the top gestures at first.
Your goal for a first date should be getting a second date, not a wedding ring.
Really huge romantic gestures etc. are not good material for a first date; they tend to be experienced by the receiver as intimidating and putting pressure on them rather than thoughtful (when they work, they work big, but in all situations where the person isn't already into you, they discourage subsequent dating). Making the other person comfortable is far more important than sweeping them off their feet with over the top gestures at first.
Your goal for a first date should be getting a second date, not a wedding ring.
River/beach/moonlight walks on a first date? Too romantic too quick. Ok it wouldn't be like dinner where an awkward silence leaves you to pick at your food, but with nature walks that awkward silence is filled with a romantic setting that's not attributing to anything and making things more awkward. Third date maybe that silence could add to the moment but first dates just leave you at 'um..'
I do understand that it's hard to keep up conversation during a dinner date but that's means you should work on your conversation skills, not change the status quo.
If not a restraunt or movie, I'd go with bars like ivar said.
just do something casual, don't go to a movie though. You spend 2 hours (or so) watching something and you leave the movie theatre having learnt next to nothing about the person you went with.
If you don't know how to have a conversation with her under normal circumstances, don't expect awesome banter on a date. Be at least on regular talking terms and just go for something casual. Grab a coffee or a drink at a bar, or do something constructive together like baking or art. Light lunches are great for keeping in regular casual contact. Dinner dates should wait until you are both more comfortable.
The rest is simple...
[x] Be attractive
[x] Don't be unattractive
[?] Be yourself
FYI I hate the dating game, but I'm going for drinks this Friday with a girl I like. We get along great and talk/text regularly so I'll be asking her to dinner next week.
The rest is simple...
[x] Be attractive
[x] Don't be unattractive
[?] Be yourself
FYI I hate the dating game, but I'm going for drinks this Friday with a girl I like. We get along great and talk/text regularly so I'll be asking her to dinner next week.
Cooky
Banned deucer.
Keep it casual go and get coffee or something else thats equally uncomitted. Hanging out in a group is always good as well to keep any awkwardness down.
Make her laugh and it doesn't really matter what you do on the date, that's not what she'll remember, and the best setting for fun interaction is usually somewhere casual and familiar.
don't take her for a river walk somewhere quiet on a first date she'll think youre a rapist
Make her laugh and it doesn't really matter what you do on the date, that's not what she'll remember, and the best setting for fun interaction is usually somewhere casual and familiar.
don't take her for a river walk somewhere quiet on a first date she'll think youre a rapist
Very this. Ala's ice skating idea was pretty good. The main point is to do something that's not so cliche, but also something that's not so "omg this is a date!" Keep the romanticism to a minimum, make a lot of eye contact (but don't stare), and smile alot. This will keep her relaxed and more prone to opening up, and the date as a whole will go better. Also, think of some lightly probing questions ahead of time to get her talking - ask her about where she grew up, what she thought of high school, if she likes cooking, etc. Try not to resort to the stereotypical small talk questions like "what kind of music do you like?" or other predictable departures. Be funny but in the natural course of the conversation (if you're forcing it she'll know).
Your ultimate goal is to get her to talk as much as possible, with you saying just enough to keep her interest. This will simultaneously let you get to know her pretty well, and it will keep her intrigued because she won't know as much about you. This makes her more interested in a second date so she can continue to learn more about you.
Finally, try to be ambiguous with some of the things you say. This way you can drop subtle hints that you like her without being wide open, whilst still allowing you a way out in case she doesn't respond. This will also continue to make her ask questions in her head about what you mean, and thus increases her intrigue even further.
I know, it sounds like a lot. This is a first date after all, so keep it simple. Just be a bit creative so you stand out from other guys she may have dated.