Quality Control Dudunsparce Coil [QC 1/2]

[SET]
Name: Coil
Move 1: Coil
Move 2: Body Slam
Move 3: Roost / Dragon Tail
Move 4: Bite / Rock Slide / Roost
Item: Leftovers / Heavy Duty Boots
Ability: Serene Grace
Nature: Careful / Adamant
EVs: 252 HP / 252 SpD / 4 Atk or 252 HP / 84 Atk / 20 Def / 152 Spe
Tera Type: Fairy / Poison



Dudunsparce has been proven to be a potent Pokemon in PU and when using Coil, Dudunsparce can utilise its decent natural bulk. It uses this to its advantage by utilising Body Slam and Roost; this makes it a good setup sweeper due to being a sweeper with recovery and the capability to status opponents. With the second given EV spread, Dudunsparce can outspeed every non-Choice Scarfed Pokemon excluding Hisuian Electrode. The 84 Atk EVs and the Adamant Nature means that Dudunsparce is guaranteed to kill Scarf and Specs Florges in two hits with Body Slam. The Def EVs are useful for having a higher chance at living Curse Arcanine’s Flare Blitz in two hits. Rock Slide is useful to hit Fire types such as Hisuian Typhlosion, Salazzle and Rotom-Heat as they can either threaten Dudunsparce with a burn or hit it with a powerful stab move such as Fire Blast. Bite can hit Ghost-types such as Hoopa, Houndstone or Golurk. Dragon Tail on Dudunsparce is used to force out prominent threats to Dudunsparce such as Tauros-Paldea-Blaze, Decidueye-Hisui and Emboar. Dudunsparce more typically runs Leftovers due to the reliable recovery it provides. Heavy Duty Boots are nice to be immune to entry hazards when you do have Roost. Tera Fairy and Poison are more standard, as they both negate the weakness to fighting and turn it into a resistance. Poison could be considered better due to not being weak to steel. Tera Poison also provides an immunity to Toxic, However Tera Fairy is nice for resisting the very common Dark types in the meta currently, such as Zoroark, Bombirdier and Scrafty.

Dudunsparce usually wants a partner that takes advantage of the paralysis that Dudunsparce spreads. Some examples of this are slower threats such as Rhydon or Florges. It can also work with other paralysis users such as Uxie, Alolan Persian and Grimmsnarl. Other good partners for Dudunsparce are Pokemon that can easily revenge kill opponents since when facing Dudunsparce, the opponent will likely be paralyzed and weakened. Examples of this are Zoroark, Bruxish and Choice Scarfed Decidueye-Hisui. All of these partners profit off of Dudunsparce weakening the opponent, and paralyzing them, so that they can either setup, or just get a simple revenge-kill. These Partners can pick off mons which are defensive walls such as Tinaktuff, Rhydon and Naclstack.

[SET CREDITS]

Written by: https://www.smogon.com/forums/members/oofhixd.694111/
Quality Checked by: https://www.smogon.com/forums/members/hera.414072/
 
Last edited:
first time using the copyedit thing, hope this works!

bold = comment or add, strikethrough = remove
[SET]
name: Dudunsparce Coil
Move 1: Coil
Move 2: Body Slam
Move 3: Dragon Tail/Roost slash roost first
Move 4: Bite/Rock Slide/Roost/Earthquake
Item: Leftovers/Heavy Duty Boots (niche) no need to mention
Ability: Serene Grace
Nature: Careful/Adamant
EVs: 252 HP/252 Special Defense/4 Attack or 252 HP/104 Attack/152 Speed (abrreviate evs, in this case SpD for special defense, Atk for attack, and Spe for speed)
Tera Type: Fairy/Poison/Ghost (niche)

add spaces between slashes, one before and one after

Dudunsparce has been proven to be a potent pokemon recently (don't mention current meta state, this isn't a spotlight), and here I am to discuss it. (never use first person pronouns in an analysis) Using a coil move set, dudunsparce can utilise its decent natural bulk and increase it further whilst also being able to boost its attack and accuracy. (don't repeat dex information, it's fluff) It uses this to its advantage by utilising body slam, and roost oftentimes. (the previous sentence is a good example of fluff, it's correct but obvious and pointless, instead explain what makes dudun a good setup sweeper) Body slam provides dudunsparce with a consistent stab option with a 60% chance to paralyse (pokemon uses american english, so it's paralyze with a z) due to serene grace. With the second EV set that I have provided With the given EV spread, dudunsparce can outspeed every non-scarfed (it's Choice Scarfed, you include the whole item name and capitalize it) pokemon excluding Electrode-Hisui and using either bite or rock slide, it can use the ever-annoying “para-flinch” strategy, which is especially effective due to coil boosting its attacks, (fluff, instead explain why it might use bite over rock slide and vice versa) and roost for reliable recovery. Dragon tail on dudunsparce is particularly nice due to dudunsparce being a normal type which cannot hit ghost types and is resisted by rock and steel types. (Dragon tail forces them out into a random opponent which could often provide you with a tempo, if the opponent needs to switch back out. (fluff, combine this sentence with the previous one and point out targets that dtail hits) The consistent recovery that leftovers provides for dudunsparce is really nice for it, especially when not running roost. Heavy duty boots is often fine too! as well, especially on teams which lack some sort of hazard removal, or on a bootspam team. (don't use vernacular unless you explain what it means. remember, these are for beginners, it's obvious to you what it means but not for dudunfan3857 who wants to know what it does.)

Here I’m going to discuss some more niche options.
(this is not what this paragraph is for, it's for common partners, checks, and partners for their checks) Dudunsparce can run earthquake to hit opposing steel types, but it is quite uncommon due to dudunsparce usually running dragon tail and dudunsparce suffering from 4mss (four move slot syndrome), but it is certainly something to consider! (this sentence should be in the above paragraph after the dtail sentence, also don't use exclamation points) When it comes to tera types, fairy and poison are more standard, as they both negate the weakness to fighting and turn it into a resistance, and just generally being good tera types. (fluff) Poison could be considered better due to not being weak to steel which is a type dudunsparce already struggles into. The poison tera type also provides an immunity to the toxic status ailment which is beneficial to dudunsparce because it usually likes to take its time wto have an effect due to its lower attack stat and its good natural bulk. (merge previous two sentences together and make them more concise) On the other hand, However, tera fairy is nice for resisting the very common dark types in the meta currently. Now for the more niche type, ghost. The main benefit of ghost type on dudunsparce is the immunity to fighting types which are somwhat prominent in current PU. (move all this tera stuff to the above paragraph and make the paragraph about team options) (also which fighting types?)

capitalize proper nouns, like the pokemon name, the word Pokemon (no accent), abilities, items, types, and the name of a move (e.g it's Coil, not coil; the verb Coiling is also capitalized)


[SET CREDITS]

Written by: https://www.smogon.com/forums/members/oofhixd.694111/

there's a lot to do here so please ping me when you're finished implementing all of this. also make sure to familarize yourself with Spelling and Grammar Standards as well as other analyses for proper formatting. it doesn't matter which ones, just make sure they're current gen mini-anaylses, like the pu ones we currently have up on smogon.
 
let's try that again

bold = comment or add, strikethrough = remove
[SET]
Name: Dudunsparce Coil
Move 1: Coil
Move 2: Body Slam
Move 3: Roost / Dragon Tail
Move 4: Bite / Rock Slide / Roost / Earthquake
Item: Leftovers / Heavy Duty Boots
Ability: Serene Grace
Nature: Careful / Adamant
EVs: 252 HP / 252 SpD / 4 Atk or 252 HP / 104 Atk / 152 Spe
Tera Type: Fairy / Poison / Ghost (see below)



Dudunsparce has been proven to be a potent pokemon Pokemon in PU. Using a Coil move set, Dudunsparce can utilise its decent natural bulk. It uses this to its advantage by utilising body slam and roost (you didn't capitalize these move names) oftentimes, (add semicolon) ;this makes it a good setup sweeper due to being a sweeper with recovery and the capability to status opponents (this is just the same information in the previous sentence repeated). Body Slam provides Dudunsparce with a consistent stab option with a 60% chance to paralyze due to serene grace. (stab moves are obvious) With the second given EV spread, Dudunsparce can outspeed every non-Choice Scarfed pokemon (capitalize) excluding Electrode-Hisui Hisuian Electrode and using either bite or rock slide, it can use the ever-annoying “para-flinch” strategy. Dudunsparce has the option of using either Rock Slide or Bite. (fluff) Rock Slide is useful due to having 75 base power, but it is also held back by the 90% accuracy and an offensive typing on the weaker side. On the other hand, Bite has less base power at only 60, but 100% accuracy and a better offensive typing. (neither of the previous sentences are wrong but they're also mostly fluff and dex info, instead explain what rock slide hits over bite, basically just do what you did next for rock slide) Crucially, Bite can also hit ghost types such as Hoopa, Houndstone or Golurk. Roost also benefits this set via reliable recovery. Dragon tail (capitalize) on Dudunsparce is particularly nice due to dudunsparce being a normal type which cannot hit ghost types and is resisted by rock and steel types. Dragon Tail can for forcing out prominent threats to Dudunsparce such as: (improper use of a colon) Tauros-Paldea-Blaze, Decidueye-Hisui and Emboar. Dudunsparce can run Earthquake to hit opposing steel types, but it is quite uncommon due to Dudunsparce usually running Dragon Tail (this is not why dudun doesn't run quake super often), and Dudunsparce suffering from 4mss (Four move slot syndrome). The consistent recovery that Leftovers provides for Dudunsparce is really nice for it, especially when not running Roost. Heavy Duty Boots is often fine as well, especially on teams which lack some sort of hazard removal, or on a bootspam team which is where most if not all of your team will run Heavy-Duty-Boots which negates the need for removal such as Defog and Rapid Spin (compress these two sentences with the following format, "leftovers is useful because x, while heavy duty boots cna be used over it because y, make sure not to make it too long). When it comes to tera types, Tera fairy and poison (capitalize) are more standard, as they both negate the weakness to fighting and turn it into a resistance. Poison could be considered better due to not being weak to steel. The poison tera type also provides an immunity to toxic which is beneficial to dudunsparce because it usually likes to take its time to have an effect due to its lower attack stat and its good natural bulk. However, Tera Fairy is nice for resisting the very common Dark types in the meta currently. Now for the other tera type, Ghost. The main benefit of Ghost type on Dudunsparce is the immunity to fighting types such as Pawmot, Scrafty and Hariyama, which are somwhat prominent in current PU. (this is too long as is so we're just gonna remove this for now, another qc member is free to add it later)

Dudunsparce has a lot of nice options when it comes to partners
. (fluff) It Dudunsparce usually wants a partner that takes advantage of the paralysis that Dudunsparce spreads. Some examples of this are slower threats such as Rhydon or Florges. (what do rhydon and florges offer for dudun?) It can also work well on a para-spam team which is where, well you spam paralysis (with partners like?). Other good partners for Dudunsparce are pokemon (capitalize) that can easily revenge kill opponents since when facing Dudunsparce, the opponent will likely be paralyzed and weakened. Examples of this are Zoroark, Bruxish and Decidueye-Hisui. All of these mons (we don't use the word mons here, we always say Pokemon or partners or teammates, you get the idea) profit off of Dudunsparce weaknening the opponent, and paralyzing them, so that they can either setup, or just get a simple revenge-kill.

capitalize proper nouns, like the pokemon name, the word Pokemon (no accent), abilities, items, types, and the name of a move (e.g it's Coil, not coil; the verb Coiling is also capitalized)

[SET CREDITS]

Written by: https://www.smogon.com/forums/members/oofhixd.694111/
Quality Checked by: https://www.smogon.com/forums/members/hera.414072/

this time please get this done promptly, i don't like imposing time limits but by the end of the week i would like to see this implemented so i can give this a final look over. make sure you implement everything, you missed some stuff last time.
 
it's not qc 2/2, you need two checks from two different people and i haven't stamped you yet, it's still at qc 0/2
 
you know the drill

bold = comment or add, strikethrough = remove
[SET]
Name: Coil
Move 1: Coil
Move 2: Body Slam
Move 3: Roost / Dragon Tail
Move 4: Bite / Rock Slide / Roost
Item: Leftovers / Heavy Duty Boots
Ability: Serene Grace
Nature: Careful / Adamant
EVs: 252 HP / 252 SpD / 4 Atk or 252 HP / 104 Atk / 152 Spe
Tera Type: Fairy / Poison

Dudunsparce has been proven to be a potent Pokemon in PU. Using Coil, Dudunsparce can utilise its decent natural bulk (this setence doesn't make sense by itself). It uses this to its advantage by utilising Body Slam and Roost; this makes it a good setup sweeper due to being a sweeper with recovery and the capability to status opponents. With the second given EV spread, Dudunsparce can outspeed every non-Choice Scarfed Pokemon excluding Hisuian Electrode (but why is it more offensive? what calcs does 104 atk + adamant hit over not running any atk at all?). Rock Slide is useful due to having 75 base power, but it is also held back by the 90% accuracy and an offensive typing on the weaker side, but it is nice to hit Fire types such as Hisuian Typhlosion, Salazzle and Rotom-Heat (why is hitting these pokemone important for dudun?). On the other hand, Bite has a better offensive typing being Dark. Bite can also hit ghost types Ghost-types such as Hoopa, Houndstone or Golurk. Dragon Tail on Dudunsparce is particularly for used to forceing out prominent threats to Dudunsparce such as Tauros-Paldea-Blaze, Decidueye-Hisui and Emboar. Dudunsparce likes both Leftovers and Heavy Duty Boots but (the items being on the set makes it obvious dudun like both of them)Dudunsparce more typically runs Leftovers due to the reliable recovery it provides. On the other hand, Heavy Duty Boots are nice to be immune to Entry Hazards (entry hazards is lowercase) when you do have Roost. Tera fairy and poison (capitalize fairy and poison) are more standard, as they both negate the weakness to fighting (capitalize) and turn it into a resistance. Poison could be considered better due to not being weak to steel. The poison tera type Tera Poison also provides an immunity to toxic (capitalize) which is beneficial for Dudunsparce because it usually likes to take its time to have an effect due to its lower attack stat and its good natural bulk. (defensive mon not liking toxic is obviously, we all know how toxic works) However, Tera Fairy is nice for resisting the very common Dark types in the meta currently (such as?).

Dudunsparce usually wants a partner that takes advantage of the paralysis that Dudunsparce spreads. Some examples of this are slower threats such as Rhydon or Florges who benefit Dudunsparce by being good breakers with Rhydon’s “Double Dance” set and Florges’ Calm Mind set. It can also work well on a para-spam team which is where, well you spam paralysis with partners with other paralysis users such as Uxie, Alolan Persian and Grimmsnarl. Other good partners for Dudunsparce are Pokemon that can easily revenge kill opponents since when facing Dudunsparce, the opponent will likely be paralyzed and weakened. Examples of this are Zoroark, Bruxish and Decidueye-Hisui (what exactly do they revenge kill that dudun doesn't like? also specify scarf for hdecid). All of these partners profit off of Dudunsparce weaknening weakening the opponent, and paralyzing them, so that they can either setup, or just get a simple revenge-kill.

[SET CREDITS]

Written by: https://www.smogon.com/forums/members/oofhixd.694111/
Quality Checked by: https://www.smogon.com/forums/members/hera.414072/

this should be the last one. normally i would stamp it here but you keep missing stuff so ping me one last time when you're done so i can see if you've missed anything.
 
"Tera fairy and poison are more standard, as they both negate the weakness to fighting and turn it into a resistance."

i keep telling you to capitalize fairy, poison, and fighting here and you keep missing it. capitalize them please.

there are more issues but you know what? i've done enough for this analysis, the next qc member can pick up where i left off. at least it looks passable now.

qc 1/2
1744053606131.gif
 
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