Serious LGBTQ+

Ace Emerald

Dark glasses, gold liquor
is a Contributor to Smogonis a Site Content Manager Alumnusis a Top Social Media Contributor Alumnusis a Super Moderator Alumnus
Hello friends, I'm ready to be out (at least under this barely anonymous pseudonym). I'm bigender and transfem, use she/him pronouns with preference for she. No dead name (my birth name is still "alive") but I've picked out a new fem name that I love.

My egg finally cracked back in March after reading the gender dysphoria bible and finding it some sections highly relatable. That caused even more confusion initially, because if I was trans then how did I make it so far in life as a man without realizing it?? After a couple weeks of panic and anxiety, I finally sought out a therapist that specializes in queer identities, and I've been able to work through a lot of this.

I like the bigender label, mostly because I relate to a lot of other people using that label. I don't mind being a man, but I desperately want to be a woman as well. I also like using transfem as a label as I am interested in physical aspects of transitioning. I hope to get on HRT one day, which might compromise my ability to pass as a man, but the physical changes feel important to me. That's pretty far off for now, and I'm still in the process of exploring my gender and figuring out what I want.

Coming out was a hard decision to make, but it was made easier by all the lovely people who have come out before me. Much love to everyone here <3


can't talk rn
Yooo coming out party guess I'm coming out officially very cool!

So: gay. I am not out to any of my family yet very cool. Thought I'd post here so everyone knows! I was initially scared to post here because I was very afraid of how some people, especially close PS! friends, would react, but I figure that they're not really worth having in my life if they're not supportive of my decisions.

I've also been dealing with some weird gender stuff but I'll make sure to update if my tiny coconut brain finally decides to settle on something. In the meantime, he/him/his pronouns please.

Anyways! Shout out to especially bea and smely socks who helped me gather up the courage to post here.

Love you all!

e: completely forgot abt this post ahhh- corrected someone's name <3
update: trans :hearts: i dont really feel comfortable sharing my experience as its v personal to me but i felt its important to come out on smogon officially. love all you and ty to everyone who's been super supportive and always there for me :)

she/they, feel free to refer to me as lauryn or pisx/pisxel <3

much love to you all

edit: spelling . . .
Last edited:


Pay 5000, gg?
is a Contributor to Smogon
(Don't think i've act introduced myself in this thread, he/him panromatic heterosexual here hiii)


I don't get the burning hatred some people have for LGBTA+ people? Like, I can't wrap my head around it anymore, despite being initially being brought up to have hostility to it. I grew out of it of course, finding it absurd. But still, I just question the vitriol towards it.
I think for many people its more comfortable to assume that there is a group of people out there that is wrong and that you are apart of a small group that knows the "correct way". By establishing the LGBTQIA+ community as wrong and incorrect, they are allowing themselves to be placed on a pedestal and validating their existence due to superiority. This also applies imo to Flat Earthers and Fake Moon Landing conspiracy theorists, its a way to make yourself feel better and secure your insecurities. Wouldn't you feel good assuming you knew without a shadow of a doubt that you were right and Albert Einstein or Stephen Hawking or Isaac Newtwon was wrong? The mentality that you are right and everyone else is wrong is extremely easy to get yourself sucked into, and is what causes these kinds of people to come about in my experience. This is by no means truly JUSTIFYING it, its still wrong, but its my personal theory as to the primary reason behind this.
Alright, guess it's my time to introduce myself.

I'm Kara, but most people would know me as Nightingales around here, especially in the UU community.

For the longest time, I was a only a girl online. I never saw anything wrong with it, I was genuinely happier about myself when everyone saw me as female. It was just normal to me to have that separation of online offline, where I was a 'normal' guy online and online I was somebody I was happier being. I saw all these cute girls who I was always jealous of, and never once paid any thought to that I never aspired to look like other guys. I always wondered what I would've looked like if I'd been born as the opposite sex, and yet when I asked what it was like from the other side I always had it passed off as 'oh that's normal.'

It took me until about the time I was sixteen that I realized that it really wasn't normal to be thinking about that stuff. It was pointed out to me that 'hey, you're probably just non-binary and that's alright!' But living with a single, very conservative mother made it impossible to really get the freedom to explore any of that. I more or less suppressed all those thoughts for a few years, life was happening and while there was always some level of discomfort or anxiety about myself I passed it off as just teenaged depression.

COVID hit last year, and in the months-long quarantine I had a lot of time to sit and think about things. It suddenly occurred to me that everything I'd thought I knew and took as normal for myself weren't just me being happier as a girl online, it was because I was happier as a girl in general. It took me a long time to come to terms with that and do something about that.

Anyways, in about two weeks I'll be three months on HRT. I'm not sure how it'll be like when I go forward, but the fact I'm getting the chance to do this has me more grateful than words can really express.


you horrible cheating girl
is a Community Contributoris a Contributor to Smogon
Good evening, not gonna make this one super long because a lot of the stuff is pretty personal to me.

Ever since I was younger, I have not felt the most comfortable as a male. I dont really know how to describe it, but ive always ive felt weird about it and as a result I think ive tried to act a little more feminine over the years. This has especially been the case even more in the last 3 years, as ive been friends with a few girls irl for this time, and ive always wanted to be like one of them. As a result, a little while after coming out as bi in early July, I started to experiment with my gender identity more, and after thinking about it a lot and talking with some people, ive decided what I want to do. Three days ago I asked some of my closer smogon friends to use she / her with me in a private discord, and now I feel comfortable extending that to Smogon as a whole. Please use she / her pronouns with me and refer to me as Holly



i lov clef <3 hehe
is a Pre-Contributor
umm hello im bad at making these kinds of posts but to keep things short, im girl and my name is iris

to make things longer, ive been considering this for a good amount of months now and i never rly noticed the signs that ive been showing since i was rly young!! i kinda just brushed them aside haha, but thanks to cleffa, ausma, cleffas sister, and countless other friends, ive finally faced how much ive been putting off really acknowledging this and realizing that i am in fact a girl :> srry if that all doesnt make too much sense but i guess ive just always wanted to get this out here! thank you!


is a Tournament Directoris a Forum Moderatoris a Community Contributoris a Social Media Contributor Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
ok serious topic now, i came to my parents as bi and... i dont know what i did expect of this event but i'm completely devastated by how my parents reacted only thinking about how other people would react and not caring for how i actually feel.
so right now im listening to ts' "soon you'll get better" in repeat and wishing for a happy ending for my own story

to everyone who has known of it since ever and supported me through it, thank you and i love u all
This has come and gone, and I ended up forgetting to post about it here... anyway, 2 years! And I did get better, thank you Taylor Swift.
Life's weird; work's weird; my relationships are weird too. But I'm happier than I've ever been for these past two years, and I wish the younger me could have had this sense of self and happiness that comes with it. Thank you everyone thats been a part of this journey <3


mic check
is a Top Artistis a Community Contributor
gender and sexuality are really really hard to explore for me. i recently had a revelation that... really changed how i see things for myself though.
i don't feel attracted to men. at all. but my complex and weird relationship with gender has made me feel reluctant to label myself as a lesbian, i don't know how these things work but i figured i just wasn't allowed to because i'm not entirely a girl. i hope this doesn't come off as insensitive since i genuinely am just terribly under-educated. i asked my dear friend ausma tonight about if she thought i could anyways, and she sent me an article detailing that i could in fact be a lesbian as an nb (female leaning?) person. its like everythings clicked into place, if you feel me? reading that it's okay for me to be the way i want to was incredibly comforting considering i've felt this way for literal years, since i was in 7th grade; not interested in men, but scared to label myself as lesbian because of my funny brain giving me gender dysphoria. but, as i am now, i am a lesbian. labels are overrated in my eyes but this one feels so personal because it's something i've wanted to feel comfortable with for so long. i want to learn more. i feel like such a fool for taking so long. sorry if this came off as oversharing or repetitive. i'm... processing a lot and wanted a spot i can explode.

last minute edit: i think a big part of why i felt i couldn't identify the way i want was because i grew up on tumblr. a big part of the lgbt community was super gatekeepy about these things at the time and i just grew to believe it. weirdly, i always felt it was okay for other ppl like me to be lesbian; just not me. i was holding my own self back (prob some other deep rooted shit idk im happy with this for now)

thank you to my lovely girlfriend iris, and connie. you both helped me so much today!
Last edited:


The most fabulous user on Smogon.
is a Tiering Contributorwon the 11th Official Smogon Tournamentis a Past SPL Champion
Here are two simple things you can do right away to make queer folks feel included, safe, and give them comfort knowing that there are thoughtful and accepting people out there.

1) don’t assume that everyone you meet is heterosexual. Unless you know who the person is dating, use “significant order” vs. bf/gf/wife/husband/etc. when such conversations come up.

2) put personal pronouns (e.g., he/him, she/her, etc) in your signature or next to your name.


ready to go!
is a Pre-Contributor
happy bi visibility which was yesterday for like the majority of the world! i told a group of friends that was biromantic one or two weeks ago and i'm comfy sharing with the rest of smogon now that i've made up my mind! both boys and girls are cute what can i say

probably wouldn't have had ability to properly think about stuff and get help with deciding without my friends so ily all

Bidoof Princess

Probably cuter than you
is a Battle Simulator Moderator
So i never post here but ive struggled w/ my sexuality for a while mostly out of A) ignorance, 2) reluctance to do research, iii) not engaging with the community beyond a surface level like ever. Was mostly just never able to find a term that i felt i really could identify with.

But the other day i finally got around to researching what asexuality actually is and i dont think anything's clicked faster for me in my life.

So yeah i guess im ace. oh and also biromantic, but idk that feels less important to me fsr

idk how to end one of these so uwu
I've got a weird LGBT situation here. I was born male but since I was born feel like I should have been born a girl, at least biologically. However, my personality contains traits of both genders (around 87.5% female and 12.5% male) yet I have no attractions to any other person.
However, my family is EXTREMELY anti-lgbt. My whole family dislikes me for being LGBT and I am always the target of discrimination in them. They also sheltered me from this being a thing so I felt completely alone until 5th grade when I learned a little more about the community.
Thank you for hearing me out. I know this is a bit personal even for this thread but I have felt very unacceptable and hated for my differences all my life.
in the previous lgbt thread i made a post coming out as a trans girl. since then, ive thought about it a lot and experimented a lot with my gender expression, and i've come to know myself a lot better. while the idea of being exclusively a man/masculine for my whole life was and still is horrifying to me, so too is the idea of forever being a girl. in that post a few months ago, i wrote:

and i still feel this. what i've realised is that the feelings that ive been feeling are 'i don't want to always be a man', not 'i want to be a girl'. i don't want to give up masculinity entirely.

i've seen labels like 'bigender' and 'genderfluid' that could probably be reasonably applied to me, but i prefer not to identify with them for various reasons. i prefer to use the more general term 'non-binary' to describe myself, and i have no particular preference in terms of pronouns. he/she/they, i'm not really bothered too much about it. i'm still trying to learn about myself, but for now this is how i'm most comfortable identifying. rn i'm trying to build up the confidence to present a bit more feminine in public :0

thanks for supporting me yall, happy pride month!

ps: i still rly like the name phoebe
You're not alone. I tried to kill myself before because of how much I hate being a boy.


is a Tournament Directoris a Forum Moderatoris a Community Contributoris a Social Media Contributor Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
I have been with this man for quite some time, and I ended up falling in love with him. It was beautiful, sad, and I always knew it'd be tragic too. And well, here we are: we decided to break up this Sunday. We are not mad at each other or anything, we just had different expectations about what we could offer each other, plus we come from different backgrounds and it was hard to accommodate to each other sometimes even though I think we tried our best.

Experiencing this break-up was however much less traumatic than I'd anticipated, and I've found that I actually miss my friend more than I miss the person than I experienced love with. Or maybe it wasn't love at all? Maybe I was afraid of losing everything that related to him than anything else, but I did like to be with him and gave him priority over everyone else that wanted me (or that I wanted too, I guess). It's complicated.

I do miss him, make no mistake. I do carry my own regrets, and I do believe he carries his too. But as much as we wanted to make it work, it just wasn't meant to be. I cried a lot this past Sunday, but now I feel mostly... weird. It's weird that I had to delete all our pictures and messages because I knew I'd come back and keep reading our best (and worst too) moments and wonder what could have happened. It's weird that I've lost my Wild Rift support all of sudden. It's weird that I'll have to explain this to my friends that also considered him as a friend too. It's weird that I ended up crying when facetiming my mother and now I'll have to explain to her why.

But ultimately... it was all worth it. I'm glad I got to experience it, and sure as hell I was happy - but I'll find happiness with someone else too (ugh thank you Taylor Swift). I sometimes wish lgbtq+ relationships were as easy as some of my friends' straight ones, but gays have to make everything more complicated and that is our fate and I've come to accept it (hell, even my therapist thinks so and he's straight as hell).

Anyhow, I just wanted to vent somewhere because listening to Taylor Swift as frequently as I do kinda makes one depressive... at least there's Adele coming too so I can be the wreck that I want to be. It's sad girl autumn, after all. Smogon has always been a safe space where I could explore my sexuality more openly with my friends than I could irl, and it'll always be dear to me long after I retire from this game (which is soon anyway). Thank you :)
I'm finally here after just kinda not feeling putting anything here.

I imagine that if you know me (I am also Morytha on PS if you did not know), then you know that I want to be a girl (she/her), name Elizabeth since it's nice to have out there (please only use Morytha on PS unless I decide otherwise!!). I dunno that's about it at the surface.

Want is important an important here, it's hard to see myself as any more.

The thing with me is I both want to be a girl but also don't want it to be too much, as in it would be better than what I am now. There's definitely this desire to not be what I am now and wanting to be a girl. I guess it's like I want to be a girl and at the same time a bit of none, I'm not like particularly attached to anything, but being a girl would be better for me.

Unfortunately, I happen to live in Arkansas, so not much of an option for anyone to more aside from at school (two people know here). I'd talk to them more about it but incredibly shy and scary so time will tell what I do.

I guess that's it for like, the why and the situation. I dunno I'm not the most open with stuff like this so it's probably a rough read, sorry.

ok that's the end of that. look at my nice sticker:

enby? yes!

okay anyway, realised I was nonbinary a couple nights ago! looking back at everything though, I realised I wasn't really happy when I first came out as trans. I feel so happy now though! I still lean very femme and people have been gendering me as female as of late, but I've just realised I love they/them and she/her pronouns and I just love when people don't know my gender because of how I dress and just use they/them to refer to me and try not to use gendered language.

so yea, I'm enby!!


shine brightest under the lights || she / her
is a Social Media Contributoris a Forum Moderatoris a Community Contributoris a Tiering Contributoris a Site Content Manager Alumnusis a Live Chat Contributor Alumnus
Yesterday was one year since I came out as transgender.

Being transgender really sucks. Every single day I deal with massive amounts of gender dysphoria, either through seeing girls on my college campus or simply wishing I could have a feminine body. I spend a lot of nights staying up until as late as 5:30 AM begging the world to let me be a pretty girl.

This doesn't even begin to delve into the problems of transphobia. This website, my family, the world -- it comes from everywhere. When I was packing up to go back to school when my break was over my mom adamantly opposed be bringing the perfume I had bought for myself a few months back. Subtle things like that or my dad saying I'd never look good in a dress (and then laughing at me) makes me feel incredibly awful.

And yet, I put up with it all. Being a girl makes me that happy.

Thank you to all my friends who have supported me over the past year; it really means the world to me. Despite the hardships, I have no regrets about following my heart -- it's not about doing what's easy, it's about doing what makes me happy.

To all my LGBTQ+ friends -- stay strong. Trust me, I know it's tough, but please don't let the downsides get in the way of doing what you love. Me, and many others, are always out there supporting you. If you ever want to talk, you can find me on Discord at emma#0404.

Light Sanctity

안녕하세요, 제 이름은 라이트닝 입니다.
is a Live Chat Contributor Alumnus
Yesterday was one year since I came out as transgender.

Being transgender really sucks. Every single day I deal with massive amounts of gender dysphoria, either through seeing girls on my college campus or simply wishing I could have a feminine body. I spend a lot of nights staying up until as late as 5:30 AM begging the world to let me be a pretty girl.

This doesn't even begin to delve into the problems of transphobia. This website, my family, the world -- it comes from everywhere. When I was packing up to go back to school when my break was over my mom adamantly opposed be bringing the perfume I had bought for myself a few months back. Subtle things like that or my dad saying I'd never look good in a dress (and then laughing at me) makes me feel incredibly awful.

And yet, I put up with it all. Being a girl makes me that happy.

Thank you to all my friends who have supported me over the past year; it really means the world to me. Despite the hardships, I have no regrets about following my heart -- it's not about doing what's easy, it's about doing what makes me happy.

To all my LGBTQ+ friends -- stay strong. Trust me, I know it's tough, but please don't let the downsides get in the way of doing what you love. Me, and many others, are always out there supporting you. If you ever want to talk, you can find me on Discord at emma#0404.

Being a girl makes me that happy.
want to put emphasis on "me" as in "you" as long as you yourself are happy that is truly what matters. Being around people who care and can support you in any way possible that's what is truly important. Comparing yourself to others can be a good thing but you are who you are; be happy and proud of what you have accomplished!

p.s. always open to anything :blobnom:


[Hyperlink Blocked]
is a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Contributor Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnusis a Battle Simulator Moderator Alumnus
Last December, I started anti-androgen monotherapy. Specifically, I started taking cyproterone acetate. This was a big deal. As has been chronicled in various posts here and as many people probably know, I had been living in a bit of a personal hell for over a decade, trying repeatedly to get through to my parents that I was trans and that living life as it was was untenable. Having spent the year working my way through the medical system and having successfully communicated to my mum that enough was enough, I had finally done it: I had, in a way, started HRT.

While I'm no endocrinologist or health specialist, I would like to just point out that taking cyproterone acetate on its own isn't the best idea. As I found out later, it isn't fantastic at suppressing testosterone on its own, especially when taken at reasonable dosages. You need to add estradiol for that. It also made me really tired all the time, which wasn't fun. However, in hindsight, I don't really regret doing this - I was absolutely beside myself at this point after how long I had waited and how much I had gone through to get this far, and doing anything felt better than continuing to do nothing.

However, to start estradiol proper I found myself in a pipeline where I had to get a psychiatrist's tick of approval. This didn't sound so bad at first because I had felt so sure of myself so consistently. Unfortunately, a three month waiting period, where I would put myself through the wringer almost daily questioning myself non-stop and asking myself if I would be seen as 'trans enough' by the psychiatrist, absolutely did my head in. The appointment itself was fine: it was only a one-off and I got my authorisation letter soon after. This all felt very contrived, though; even my doctor said to me something along the lines of 'this might seem unnecessary, but this is just something we have to do', despite the fact that there are informed consent clinics that do not require this step throughout the country. Perhaps three months is not much in the grand scheme of things, considering I waited 40 times that length of time before I could do anything at all. Was having to wait that much extra time for something that ended up being so obvious to the psychiatrist that my appointment ended 10 minutes early really needed, though? Probably not.

Anyway, after that ordeal, I started estradiol in the middle of March. The dosage I started on was 2mg estradiol valerate (EV) per day. On that dosage, I might as well have waited another two months extra for the psychiatrist appointment and then started on 4mg in May, because my estradiol levels were... not very good. Ideally, you want to hit 100-200 pg/mL at trough (the lowest point before your next dose). Meanwhile, I was getting blood tests done near where oral estradiol peaks. Oral estradiol differs a bit from injections in that levels aren't as variable between dosages. At my peak, I was sitting at a lovely 32 pg/mL. This was not very far at all from where my estradiol levels were before I started any form of HRT. This was not ideal, so my dose got increased to 4mg per day. On that dosage of EV, my levels were better but still shit, so I swapped to estradiol hemihydrate, which is very similar but a bit more effective by weight. This ended up finally getting my levels within range. I probably should have done some more reading beforehand on how 2mg oral EV/EH usually doesn't appreciably up your estradiol levels and pressed the issue with my doctor (he is very willing to listen) but I just assumed he knew best.

The real trouble for me started during the Delta variant-induced lockdown a few months ago. My health anxiety, which I've dealt with separately for a very long time, started intertwining with how I like to be somewhat informed about what different hormones and things do. Consistently higher than reference range readings for a particular adrenal androgen called DHEA-S piqued my interest, and with little to distract me due to stay-at-home orders and general loneliness, I went on a bit of a downward spiral. I started obsessing over how I might be remasculinising despite being on a strong anti-androgen and a respectable dosage of estradiol, even though no issues had ever popped up when my estradiol levels were terrible and my testosterone was higher than it is now. I sunk lots of time into reading random subreddit posts and articles that sent my anxiety through the roof, Googling every little thing I could think of, and I began to convince myself that I was reverting back to where I was before hormones, even though photos pretty clearly proved that wrong. I thought my hairline had suddenly started receding. All sorts of thoughts like this dominated my life and my day for a good couple of months. It got so bad that I was crying for hours on end a day. I ended up getting a blood test for uncommonly tested hormones like DHT (an androgen much stronger than testosterone that you get from an enzyme called 5A-reductase converting testosterone into it) and DHEA (an adrenal prohormone related to DHEA-S that can convert to either testosterone or estradiol), fully expecting both to be off the charts, and sought out a prescription for alternate anti-androgen for when I received what I knew for a fact would be proof my current regimen was ineffective. As it turned out, both of them were firmly in the low end of the reference ranges. I've still occasionally caught myself worrying since getting that blood test, but it felt good knowing I was worrying about what eventuated to be not much at all.

I probably thought starting hormones was going to be a panacea, but it hasn't been. The road leading to them was somewhat of a nightmare and it's been made clear to me that underlying issues, like my tendency to obsess for long periods of time over the smallest things or the fleetingest of thoughts, aren't going to magically disappear. However, I am still very happy that I made it far enough to live to see myself actually start them, because I've thought many times that I wouldn't.


is a Live Chat Contributoris a Contributor to Smogon
not sure how much im gonna end up writing but regardless i think a lot of this will go more into my experiences with these topics than anything else ><. this will undoubtedly read very rambly so idk pls bear with mee

for this past year or so, anyone whos talked to me or seen me would be aware that ive been acting a lot more femininely, i changed my discord tag, i associate with a new group of people (ily all btw <3), and now i changed my name on here too. acting like this is something ive been curious about for not sure how long but ive always just tried to shut it off, only for it to always grow back stronger, so when i do decide to act more feminine, i realize that i kind of like it, a lot actually ><. i rly like being able to express myself more closely to the way i want to, so at first i thought id wanted to be a girl, but the thing is, i also dont mind living the way i am rn and i dont rly feel alien in it at all. i know you dont need gender dysphoria to be what you want to be, that euphoria is more important, but even tho i like being girly, theres some situations where i dont want to be girly (mainly irl but also outside of this site). as a result i wasnt sure if i wanted to be girl, if i wanted to just be a feminine boy, or something like nb. all of these factors, such as how i liked being and seeing myself as girly, how i dont mind the way i am rn, how my parents would disown me if i ever told them anything, how im not rly interested in transitioning, and how i knew that i could change my mind at any point, made it really hard for me to really accept myself for who i am.

thats why im so glad i have people on here to talk to and just feel things out, even if these people arent in a relatable situation as me. ive been able to experiment with this gender identity more and i just feel a lot better about myself, i dont really feel any internalized hatred towards myself. some people have even told me things that have been so validating for me, and ill even share some of those interpretations to anyone still trying to figure themselves out. its perfectly valid to not be 100% sure of who you are right now, and its perfectly valid to think of yourself as one thing in the moment but change your mind afterwards when something else pops up. i know it might be too general and that second one might not apply well if youre wanting to medically transition, but for someone like me it made me feel a lot better about myself. im very bad at shouting people out and i always feel like ill miss someone but shoutouts Lunala omicorio Kavatika anime sans Lyss Juno dnagerbdager pannuracotta hs mncmt Aliss Lilburr ily all :pleading_face: . if i missed you but you feel like you helped me with this in some way, chances are you probably did!! <3

you might be wondering why im saying all of this yet i never even said what i see myself as, and honestly labels are hard and i dont rly like them, cause at the end of the day im still churine. i think genderfluid would be the closest label rn, i tend to see myself differently depending on what i feel or where im at. im also not very picky on pronouns so dont stress over that, though i might make a certain preference a little too obvious >~<, not like i didnt already pick out a name for myself that a few people here know about... im bad at ending these things so all i can say is that thank u and ur valid im likely bisexual k good night <3.
basically im queer as fuck, learned to accept myself being genderfluid, and am not picky about pronouns.
Last edited:

Users Who Are Viewing This Thread (Users: 1, Guests: 5)