RMC (Rate My Check)

[Professor Birch]

This was my first check and I'd appreciate any input! Was for Ubers Ditto by the way.

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Comments

Original

Overview
########
Whilst Ditto faces some competition from Goomy in the squishy purple blob department, its role in the ubers metagame is still unique. With Imposter and a choice scarf equipped, it is capable of revenge killing and scouting in a way no other Pokemon can match. However, whilst it does suffer from poor HP, the inability to revenge kill healthy opponents often, and being fairly ineffectual versus stall, the introduction of Mega Evolving and Sticky Web help secure it a place in the metagame. It is a great deterrent for your opponent to set up.

Imposter
########
name: Choice Scarf
move 1: Transform
move 2:
move 3:
move 4:
ability: Imposter
item: Choice Scarf
evs: 248 HP / 252 Def / 8 SDef
nature: Relaxed
ivs: 0 Atk / 0 Spd

Moves
========

Whilst Ditto has a wide and fantastic movepool, this is truly its optimal moveset, as no options other than Transform are truly viable, as the move is the crux of this set, with such game-breaking potential.

Set Details
========

A Choice Scarf allows it to outspeed or tie with any opposing threats, allowing it to check sweepers and Megas effectively. The EVs and IVs put it in the greatest possible situation should you enter a war versus opposing Ditto. The IVs also give you a hidden power type of Ice, but these can be adjusted should any type seem more useful.

Usage Tips
========

Ditto is best brought in to revenge kill or by U-turn, Baton Pass, or Volt Switch. It can be used to scout movesets, or to revenge kill an opponent's Pokemon. Be careful in selecting a move, as after you choose it you are locked into it, and immunities are particularly punishable. Versus defensive teams, ditto's best options are to abuse recovery and hazard setting and removal. Beware however that ditto is vulnerable to all damaging hazards, although it is still effective under the conditions of Sticky Web. It performs very well versus Sticky Web team due to being a fast revenge killer that is unaffected by it.

Team Options
========

Ditto tends to act more as glue than pairing particularly well with any certain Pokemon, but tends to work more effectively on offensive teams, as unlike many defensive pokemon, it checks a lot of Pokemon in the metagame without halting momentum. Pokemon that can set or remove hazards pair well with it, as well as Pokemon that can weaken opposing Xerneas and Ekiller. Checks to Calm Mind Arceus are important too, as Ditto has significant difficult revenge killing them.

Other Options
########

While it has a wide movepool, no other options for its moveset are particularly striking. Running Limber over Imposter serves no purpose, nor does using a different item. Ditto's only other real option is adjusting its IVs to have a different Hidden Power type when it copies an opponent which uses it.

Checks & Counters
########

**Calm Mind Arceus**: Any Calm Mind Arceus is generally too bulky for Ditto to revenge kill. Bear in mind Ditto's Judgement is always Normal type, unless it holds a plate, which it cannot afford to do.

**Substitute**: Ditto's Imposter and Transform are rendered totally useless by an unbroken Substitute.

**Sword Dance Arceus-Ghost Lacking Shadow Claw** Due to the mechanics of Shadow Force, Ditto's Speed advantage means that it loses to Sword Dance Arceus-Ghost that lack Shadow Claw and run Shadow Force.

**Status**: Ditto dislikes all form of status. Paralysis in particular slowing it down is an issue for it, while burn means it is unable to effectively imitate physical attackers. Toxic damage puts its life on a timer.

**Stall**: Defensive builds leave Ditto little options in terms of bringing its own utility to the team.

**Trapping**: After Ditto has revenge killed something, a trapper such as Mega Gengar can often remove it from play.

The Stuff

Overview
########
WhilstWhile Ditto faces some competition from Goomy in the squishy purple blob department, its role in the Ubers metagame is still unique. With Imposter and a Choice Scarf equipped, it is capable of revenge killing and scouting in a way no other Pokemon can match. However, While Ditto does suffer from a poor HP stat the inability to revenge kill healthy opponents often, [Generally, you wouldn't try to revenge kill a healthy opponent and this goes against the previous sentence] and being fairly ineffectual versus stall, the introduction of Mega Evolution and Sticky Web helped secure it a place in the metagame as a deterrent for opposing Pokemon trying to set up. It is a great deterrent for your opponent to set up.

Imposter
########
name: Choice Scarf
move 1: Transform
move 2:
move 3:
move 4:
ability: Imposter
item: Choice Scarf
evs: 248 HP / 252 Def / 8 SDef
nature: Relaxed
ivs: 0 Atk / 0 Spd

Moves
========

WhilstWhile Ditto has a "wide and fantastic movepool,"[Added quotations to make it easier to understand for those that may not have Pokemon knowledge and/or are new] this is truly its optimal moveset, as no options other than Transform are truly viable.[Comma to period] as the move is the crux of this set, with such game-breaking potential.["Avoid using 'crux' in your analysis unless you know what you are doing. 95% of the time, you will simply be adding useless filler like "X is the crux of this set," which does not provide the reader with any information of value."]

Set Details
========

A Choice Scarf allows it to outspeed or Speed tie with any opposing threats, allowing it to check sweepers and MegasMega Evolutions effectively. The EVs and IVs put it in the greatest possible situation should you enter a war versus opposing Ditto. The given IVs and EV spread put Ditto in the most favorable position should you enter a war against an opposing Ditto. The IVs also give youDitto a Hidden Power type of Ice, but these can be adjusted should any type seem more useful.

Usage Tips
========

Ditto is best brought in to revenge kill or bythrough U-turn, Baton Pass, or Volt Switch. It can be used to scout movesets,[Comma not needed] or to revenge kill an opponent's Pokemon. Be careful in selecting a move, as after you choose it you are locked into it, and immunities are particularly punishable. VersusAgainst defensive teams, Ditto's best options are to abuse recovery andas well as hazard setting and removal. Beware,[Comma] however,[Comma] that Ditto is vulnerable to all damaging hazards, although it is still effective under the conditions of Sticky Web, with the Speed reduction being negated by the Choice Scarf. It performs very well versus Sticky Web team due to being a fast revenge killer that is unaffected by it.

Team Options
========

Ditto tends to act more as glue than pairing particularly well with any certain Pokemon, but tends to work more effectively on offensive teams, as unlike many defensive pokemon, it checks a lot of Pokemon in the metagame without halting momentum.Although being more effective on offensive teams, Ditto acts as "glue" instead of particularly pairing well with others, as unlike many defensive Pokemon, it checks many Pokemon in the metagame without halting momentum. Despite this, Pokemon that can set or remove hazards pair well with itgo nicely with Ditto, as well as Pokemon that can weaken an opposing Xerneas and Ekiller. Checks to Calm Mind Arceus are important too, as Ditto has significant difficulty[Added the 'y'] revenge killing them.

Other Options
########

While itDitto has a wide movepool, no other options for its moveset are particularly striking. Running Limber over Imposter serves no purpose, nor does using a different item. Ditto's only other real option is adjusting its IVs to have a different Hidden Power type when it copies an opponent which uses it.

Checks & Counters
########

**Calm Mind Arceus**: Any Calm Mind Arceus is generally too bulky for Ditto to revenge kill. BearKeep in mind Ditto's Judgement is always Normal-type[Added hyphen], unless it holds a plate, which it cannot afford to do.

**Substitute**: Ditto's Imposter and Transform are rendered totally useless by an unbroken Substitute.

**Sword Dance Arceus-Ghost Lacking Shadow Claw** Due to the mechanics of Shadow Force, Ditto's Speed advantage means that it loses to Sword DanceSwords Dance[Move is "Swords Dance" and not "Sword Dance"] Arceus-Ghost that lack Shadow Claw and run Shadow Force.

**Status**: Ditto dislikes all form of status. Paralysis in particular slowing it down is an issue for it, while burn means it is unable to effectively imitate physical attackers. Toxic damage puts its life on a timer.

**Stall**: Defensive builds leave Ditto little options in terms of bringing its own utility to the team.

**Trapping**: After Ditto has revenge killed something, a trapper such as Mega Gengar can often remove it from play.

Copy-Paste

Overview
########
While Ditto faces some competition from Goomy in the squishy purple blob department, its role in the Ubers metagame is still unique. With Imposter and a Choice Scarf equipped, it is capable of revenge killing and scouting in a way no other Pokemon can match. While Ditto does suffer from poor HP stat and being fairly ineffectual versus stall, the introduction of Mega Evolution and Sticky Web helped secure it a place in the metagame as a deterrent for opposing Pokemon trying to set up.

Imposter
########
name: Choice Scarf
move 1: Transform
move 2:
move 3:
move 4:
ability: Imposter
item: Choice Scarf
evs: 248 HP / 252 Def / 8 SDef
nature: Relaxed
ivs: 0 Atk / 0 Spd

Moves
========

While Ditto has a "wide and fantastic movepool," this is truly its optimal moveset, as no options other than Transform are truly viable.

Set Details
========

A Choice Scarf allows it to outspeed or Speed tie with any opposing threats, allowing it to check sweepers and Mega Evolutions effectively. The EVs and IVs put it in the greatest possible situation should you enter a war versus opposing Ditto. The IVs also give Ditto a Hidden Power type of Ice, but these can be adjusted should any type seem more useful.

Usage Tips
========

Ditto is best brought in to revenge kill or through U-turn, Baton Pass, or Volt Switch. It can be used to scout movesets or to revenge kill an opponent's Pokemon. Be careful in selecting a move, as after you choose it you are locked into it, and immunities are particularly punishable. Against defensive teams, Ditto's best options are to abuse recovery as well as hazard setting and removal. Beware, however, that Ditto is vulnerable to all damaging hazards, although it is still effective under the conditions of Sticky Web, with the Speed reduction being negated by the Choice Scarf.

Team Options
========

Although being more effective on offensive teams, Ditto acts as "glue" instead of particularly pairing well with others, as unlike many defensive Pokemon, it checks many Pokemon in the metagame without halting momentum. Despite this, Pokemon that can set or remove hazards go nicely with Ditto, as well as Pokemon that can weaken an opposing Xerneas and Ekiller. Checks to Calm Mind Arceus are important too, as Ditto has significant difficulty revenge killing them.

Other Options
########

While Ditto has a wide movepool, no other options for its moveset are particularly striking. Running Limber over Imposter serves no purpose, nor does using a different item. Ditto's only other real option is adjusting its IVs to have a different Hidden Power type when it copies an opponent which uses it.

Checks & Counters
########

**Calm Mind Arceus**: Any Calm Mind Arceus is generally too bulky for Ditto to revenge kill. Keep in mind Ditto's Judgement is always Normal-type, unless it holds a plate, which it cannot afford to do.

**Substitute**: Ditto's Imposter and Transform are rendered totally useless by an unbroken Substitute.

**Sword Dance Arceus-Ghost Lacking Shadow Claw** Due to the mechanics of Shadow Force, Ditto's Speed advantage means that it loses to Swords Dance Arceus-Ghost that lack Shadow Claw and run Shadow Force.

**Status**: Ditto dislikes all form of status. Paralysis in particular slowing it down is an issue for it, while burn means it is unable to effectively imitate physical attackers. Toxic damage puts its life on a timer.

**Stall**: Defensive builds leave Ditto little options in terms of bringing its own utility to the team.

**Trapping**: After Ditto has revenge killed something, a trapper such as Mega Gengar can often remove it from play.

 

[Ender]

Readability: 5/5

Absolutely no problems here. Use of bold, strikethrough, and multiple easy to read colors looks great.

Subjective Changes: 17/20

There were some instances where you changed things that didn't really need to be changed, but it could certainly be argued that it improves the prose, so that's up to your discretion. If I were to give a suggestion here, it would be to make sure that any extraneous changes you make actually do improve prose or convey meaning more effectively. There are some changes you made that I'm ambivalent about whether or not they are an improvement or merely a change. Just something to keep in mind.

Accuracy: 27/30

There were a couple of changes that you made that were not completely correct in addition to a couple things you missed, but I'm certain that these could easily be fixed by reading the sentence after you have changed it. Also a couple punctuation problems, though again, these could be easily fixed by being a bit more meticulous.

Miscellaneous: 5/5

I have nothing else to add in this section.

Overall: 54/60

I'm impressed. This is a very solid check, and the problems it has could easily be fixed by just being a bit more careful. I think the biggest issue with it is that you make unnecessary changes in certain situations, but learning when to preserve the writer's prose and when to inject your own is something that comes with experience more than anything else. Read your changes over carefully and really think whether or not making a change is worth it, and when in doubt, either ask someone for input or don't change it. I'd be happy to talk individual points over with you if you would like on #grammar. Very good job.

 

[bb skarm]

http://www.smogon.com/forums/threads/helioptile-qc-3-3-gp-1-2.3512909/#post-5620209

Helioptile. This is my first GP check, and I think most of my posts are just going to be GP checks. I've lurked around here some, so I think I did pretty well.

 

[Ender]

Mysteria

Here are some comments I have for you:

You tend to make a lot of lateral changes - changes that affect prose but don't actually improve flow or readability. For example: "thanks to" vs "due to its ability" changes the prose, but doesn't make the passage better (or worse), but it does make the writing more your voice than the author's and that is something that we want to avoid. Another example is when you change "strongest" to "best" under the Moves section - both work, so use the author's diction over your own.

I'm going to give you the same advice I give other people who have similar issues with their checks: when in doubt, it's usually best not to change. The first reason is logistical: it's much better to miss an existing error than it is to create a new one. Secondly, the less you change, the more the author's voice and tone come through and the less these attributes are obscured by your revisions. A good rule of thumb (definitely not a catch-all) is if you read the passage and it sounds fine, then it probably is. Each writer is going to have some idiosyncrasies in their writing that aren't necessarily wrong, though you may like your own prose more; however, in these situations, it's best to leave it alone because remember, this isn't your writing, it's the OP's.

There's also some awkward prose that you could have fixed but didn't. For example: "Its Normal typing, while somewhat a blessing, is also a curse" sounds awkward. You could reword it to make it clearer, but the simplest fix is to probably just insert an "of" after "somewhat". Additionally, "On top of that, it is completely dependent on the sun, (AC) which doesn't stay up too long. Without the sun, it's very outclassed by Chinchou." First off, "very outclassed" doesn't fly - harshly was actually better, though IMO no adverb at all would be ideal. Second, it might be best to combine these two sentences to say "On top of that, it is completely dependent on the sun, as it is outclassed by Chinchou without it." This change removes the awkwardness in the prose while still keeping as much of the author's voice and tone as possible by maintaining sentence structure and diction.

In terms of accuracy, I caught a few mistakes, some of which were introduced. I'll talk about a few of them here.

"Volt Switch helps keep momentum in and out of sun." If you're going to make a change like that, you have to make sure that the sentence is correct after the change (in this case, keep should be keeps). Also, if you have and separating two things that should be independent clauses but the second one doesn't have a subject, there is no comma before the and. If it sounds like there should be a comma when you read it, you have to introduce a subject in the second clause to make it a true independent clause. An example I made up:

This can be written both of these ways:

Latios flies really fast and can also KO Gyarados.
Latios flies really fast, and it can also KO Gyarados.

But NOT this way:

Latios flies really fast, and can KO Gyarados.

I caught this type of thing a few times while reading through the check.

You didn't do anything to this sentence: "Archen has an immunity to Ground-type attacks, can use Defog to remove Stealth Rock for your team’s Fire-types, carries Stealth Rock, which can help wear down Flying-types, as well as Knock Off and U-turn."

Something clearly needs to be fixed there, most likely adding an "and" to make it a list and then fixing the the "as well as" clause or moving it somewhere else in the sentence.

This isn't a bad check, but it does have the problems that I highlight above. The best things for you to do when checking from now on are

• Make absolutely sure that any changes to prose are necessary
• When you do have to change prose, try and do it by keeping some element of the author's original writing; perhaps use the words they used, or otherwise try and retain the sentence structure
• Re-read your changes to make sure they make sense and you haven't introduced a new error

I hope that helped! Please feel free to ask if you have any questions. I'm always happy to answer them.

Edit: This was an above average amcheck in my opinion. On the scale indicated in the OP, I would say it is about a 51/60 and falls into the lower part of Good.

 

[bb skarm]

RU Poliwrath

I'll probably be AM checking all day today, so if this isn't rated quick enough I'll edit my next one in.

edit: Fleurdyleurse gave it a 52/60 on my wall. That's +1 from my last check :P

 

[RockRocks]

Could one of you kind people please rate this check for me?
http://www.smogon.com/forums/threads/haxorus-qc-3-3-gp-1-2.3512845/#post-5631711
I deleted my other post because that was too long but this should be easier to judge.

 

[Lumari]

Could any of you kind souls please rate this (short one) for me: OU SubSplit Gengar
It's my second check outside the dojo (third check when counting one I didn't post because it was ninjad by an official check), and from the official check's placeholder I got the vibe that my first one was bad, so I'd really appreciate some feedback on this one.

 

[Ender]

The Dutch Plumberjack

Hey, gonna give you some feedback on your Gengar (SubSplit) amcheck! We'll go section by section and I'll give you my comments.

Moves: Okay I definitely agree with you that the first sentence is fluff. Changes to the next (now the new first) sentence are good. Yeah, crux is basically a taboo word. However, you could definitely clean up that sentence by saying, "Pain Split sets this set apart from Gengar's utility set" which makes it read a bit easier without changing too much. The way the next sentence is formatted, I would argue it's better to change the semicolon to a period. It's too much of its own thought to be subordinate to the prior sentence. Lots of good corrections here, though I would suggest changing "lots" to "a lot". There's too much going on in the next sentence so it would be better to break it up. My recommendation would be, "Gengar also is nearly immune to status conditions thanks to favorable typing and access to Substitute. These traits make it a nightmare against stall teams, giving Gengar the ability to come in almost untouched against commonly seen stall Pokemon such as Chansey, etc etc etc". Next sentence, always a comma before "and" when it separates two independent clauses. Same thing goes for "as". I would also turn "along with" into "alongside" because it sounds better. Switch-ins (use the hyphen for the noun). Oriented not orientated.

Set Details: Having should be "to have". There's some weird obscure rules about when to use the infinitive and when to use the present participle if you want to try and dig them up, but here the infinitive fits better. I would argue that damage output and offensive presence aren't the same thing, but rather damage output being a component of offensive presence. As such, I would recommend not removing offensive presence. "A lot" is unnecessary though, and can be deleted. "is ran" in the next sentences should be "is used" or "is run", though the former is more appropriate. I don't think there should be a comma before "while" here (there isn't really a break there). Also, "base" shouldn't be capitalized in this context (you fixed that earlier with HP but not here). Good catches on the it's to its here and previously. In the last sentence, the change from hinder to prevent was great and absolutely is a better choice. However, you should never use "your" to refer to the Pokemon, only to the player. I would change "your" to "Gengar's". There also should be a comma before respectively.

Usage Tips: No comma before "and" here since the second clause doesn't have a subject. With "and", you either have [independent clause] , and [independent clause] or [independent clause] and [non-independent clause]. If you absolutely need the comma before "and", you need to introduce a subject to the second clause. You could probably leave the as mentioned since the no referring to other parts is really between sets, not within a single set. Otherwise, changes in this sentence look good. "adviced" isn't a word. The whole sentence should be changed around a bit imo to say, "Laying down entry hazards is strongly advised to give Gengar an easier time shuffling around and slowly breaking down cores." or something like that. Again, you should be Gengar (you miss this twice in this sentence). I would also change "which" to "that" and remove the comma you added before it (though you're right, if which is used, you should almost always have a comma before it). Good changes in the first sentence of the next paragraph. Same with the second sentence. Comma after "Ground-" because it's still a serial list, and there's always a comma (Smogon uses the oxford comma) before the conjunction (ask Oglemi if you want to know why and he'll show you a funny picture/infographic). In this same sentence, you can't remove the comma before "and" like you did because the "and" separates two independent clauses (read them each by themselves). Last sentence looks good.

Team Options: Orientated should be oriented (use americanized spellings, not british). Patterns is misspelt as patters in the next sentence. Again, comma before the "and" in a list of 3 or more items. Interestingly, you correct this in the next sentence. Also, "their job at" can just be deleted outright, and I wouldn't use "breaking down" twice in the same sentence, so you should change one of them to some synonym. The whole examples sentence can just be deleted entirely, really.

Overall, you did pretty well. Most of your subjective changes were spot on and you caught a lot of smaller errors. I would say that your weakest point is consistency, because you catch a lot of small errors, but miss other ones. The easiest fix to this is to keep practicing and definitely read over your checks to make sure they make sense. I would also brush up just a tad on the Smogon Grammar and Spelling Standards (perhaps keep it open when you GP - this is something I do and I ctrl+f when I need to look something up). I didn't see any major problems. Sometimes you leave awkward prose in, so reading things out loud if you're unsure can really help to figure out if it's something that you should fix or leave untouched. Keep practicing and and good job with this check. As always, if you have questions, feel free to talk to me.

 

[P Squared]

Could you take a look at my RU Sneasel check?

My Ubers Gothitelle check was stamped, but I'd still like some feedback on it, if you don't mind. :)

 

[Electrolyte]

P Squared

I like the way Ender structures his checks so if you don't mind I'll do mine the same way.

RU Sneasel

OVERVIEW:
You're definitely right in identifying that the first sentence is way too long. Don't worry too much about making changes, as accuracy is still a much higher priority than maintaining voice. If you see something you know is wrong, fix it. Unfortunately, besides its absurd length, there are also a few other prose-related minor flaws in the first (and second, when you split it) that you did miss, but not so huge that it disrupts the flow, at least not as much as the length. There are two options to go about fixing the first sentence: splitting it or cleaning it up. [Sidenote: it is quite difficult to split the sentence without disrupting the voice because of the fact that the sentence contains a lot of descriptive yet unnecessary junk.] Personally I think the latter is more efficient (and easier to do!) than the former, so here's what it would look like:

"Thanks to its high base 115 Speed and ability to dispatch most of the offensive threats it outspeeds, such as Virizion and Cobalion,(AC) with Ice Punch or Low Kick respectively, as well as a good offensive typing,(RC) which grants it STAB on key moves like Knock Off, Pursuit, (comma) and Ice Shard, Sneasel is a great revenge killer, Psychic-type check,(AC) to most Psychic-type Pokemon in RU, including Meloetta, and late-game cleaner."

What I did here was 1. take out unnecessary information 2. shorten phrasing. In the first part of the sentence, "with Ice Punch or Low Kick respectively" not only grammatically forces the use of more commas which disrupt reading flow and lengthen the sentence but also add unnecessary information (you really don't have to go that specifically in-depth in an overview.) If it were up to me, I'd remove all specific Pokemon and move mentions just because they make the sentence obnoxiously complicated, but that would unfortunately remove too much of the author's voice, so I left them. Then, I condensed "to most Psychic-type Pokemon in RU, including Meloetta," making that part much shorter as well. One thing to note is that the word "Pokemon" is almost never necessary after you refer to something by its type and the phrase "in [tier]" is also almost never necessary because the tier is listed and doesn't change.

As for the rest of the overview, you did a pretty nice job cleaning the prose up. You caught all of the grammatical errors, which is nice. Just a note: "really" and "very" can be used almost interchangeably as adverbs, so that change didn't really make a difference. The paragraph still occasionally reads a little bit awkwardly but that's alright.

MOVES:
You fixed errors in this paragraph nicely. The only thing I'd like to note is that "switch in against" and "switch in on" are both acceptable, but the real best option is "switch into." Otherwise, you didn't miss anything / do anything unnecessary. Nice job here.

SET DETAILS:
Nice work here, too; just be careful with accepted termination, as I'm pretty sure "maxing" is not an acceptable term (though "max" as a verb is.) I would change "maxing out" to "maximizing," not only for accuracy but also because it sounds much more professional.

USAGE TIPS:
Parallelism, first sentence:
"Sneasel shouldn't be used to punch holes through the enemy team like Choice Specs Meloetta, Moltres, (comma) and other Pokemon usually do are."
You are using the verb "to be" to describe how they are used, so it should say "are" instead of "do."

Two unnecessary changes:
"In most circumstances, switching it Sneasel in directly is a bad idea, since most Pokemon, even those which that are weaker offensively such as Alomomola and Aromatisse,(comma) can do considerable damage to it or cripple it through status effects."
"It" is fine because the paragraph already directly refers to Sneasel as the main subject and from there the subject never shifts so it can be assumed that "it" still refers to Sneasel. As for which vs that...which is perfectly acceptable for describing plural / singular nouns, and although "that" is not incorrect, making the change is not necessary either. You didn't make any mistakes here but it could have saved you time and kept the author's main words.

I also don't really like the use of the word "smartly"; by itself it's an odd word, and used in this circumstance, it implies that all other switches are not smart. I'd remove the word altogether, as further description is not necessary in this situation.

TEAM OPTIONS:
Good job here. There are some errors I would have changed differently, but you caught and fixed everything correctly, so no problems here.

OTHER OPTIONS:
Same as above. The second sentence is worded a bit weirdly but it's grammatically accurate so whether you want to patch that up is up to you; just wanted to make sure you noticed it. I'd also like to note that around 90% of the time it's safe to assume that when people generally refer to defenses they are referring to both Defense and Special Defense. In this case, it is more obvious because Eviolite boosts both stats anyway and there is no clear context that would make specifying Defense over Special Defense make sense (frankly, even if Defense was meant, I would change to to defense regardless.)

CHECKS & COUNTERS:
"Pokemon such as Sharpedo after a Speed boost and Jolteon that can outspeed Sneasel, tank an Ice Shard,(comma) and OHKO it back, such as Jolteon and Sharpedo after a Speed Boost,(comma) are good checks."
Moving that last part to the front so the sentence doesn't end abruptly. Changed the order of the two Pokemon listed to further specify that the Speed boost only refers to Sharpedo and also so that it doesn't get mixed up with the list that follows afterwards. If you're ever reading through an analysis and come to a sentence that makes you feel like you've stopped abruptly or have slipped while reading, it's probably beneficial to fix the prose and make it read more smoothly.

Just a small thing you overlooked: there's supposed to be a comma before "respectively".



OVERALL:
Readability: 5
Subjective Changes: 17
Accuracy: 29
Misc.: 5

Total: 56: Excellent.

Readability was fine, and you made almost no accuracy mistakes. I'd work on your ability to spot and improve prose inconsistency just a little bit more, but otherwise, it was a very high quality check. Try reading through passages multiple times to develop a sense so that whenever something is worded awkwardly, you'll notice right away.

Nice work!

 

[KM]

http://www.smogon.com/forums/threads/goodra-qc-3-3-written.3516369/page-2#post-5734596

could I get some feedback on this check? (it's right before uuh's amcheck) I'm never really sure what to do in this situation, when the awkwardness of the prose makes it pretty hard to edit. I feel like sometimes I go overboard and am unable to retain their voice while making everything grammatically correct.

 

[P Squared]

Could you take a look at my UU Abomasnow check? Thank you in advance u__u

 

[Timbuktu]

I did my first check (Shroomish). Could you take a look? Thank you :)

 

[Psywaves]

This is my first ever amcheck (UU Goodra). I'm definitely curious and nervous about the overall quality of the check and the areas that I'll need to work on. I know I've missed a couple of errors and am not confident. e_e

 

[skies]

I am getting back into GP checking after a bit of a hiatus and I'd love a rate on a check I thought I did well on: Cubone! This thread is kind of inactive, so hopefully it'll be revived. Thanks :)

 

[fleurdyleurse]

hi, i didn't get the alerts, but i will rate all of these checks. consider this as a placeholder.

 

[SparksBlade]

My 1st two(and only checks :p). Would like to know if I'm going in the right direction.
http://www.smogon.com/forums/threads/lucario-revamp.3515559/#post-5761604
http://www.smogon.com/forums/threads/manaphy-tail-glow-rain-dance-gp-0-2.3513677/#post-5768066

 

[Weebl]

I'm not sure how active (if at all) this thread still is, but I'd like it if someone could look over my amcheck for NU Bouffalant, as I thought it was a competent check and one of my better ones, but the changes I made were nowhere near fleurdyleurse's. I'd like to know how far off the right track I'm going with amchecking, and I'd love to know how I could improve. :]

 

[Oglemi]

<fleurdyleurse> could you lock this thread http://www.smogon.com/forums/threads/rmc-rate-my-check.3510059/
<fleurdyleurse> till i find enough time to continue it
<fleurdyleurse> 9.9
<fleurdyleurse> right now there are a lot of checks
<fleurdyleurse> to rate
<fleurdyleurse> and tbqh it's hard to manage