>I was only 9 years old
>I loved Sheldon Cooper so much, I had all the merchandise and movies
>I pray to Sheldon Cooper every night before bed, thanking him for the life I've been given
>"Sheldon Cooper is love" I say; "Sheldon Cooper is life"
>My dad hears me and calls me a slur that I'm not repeating because I don't want to get banned
>I know he was just jealous of my devotion for Sheldon Cooper
>I called him a cunt
>He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
>I'm crying now, and my face hurts
>I lay in bed and it's really cold
>Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me
>It's Sheldon Cooper
>I am so happy
>He whispers into my ear "You're in my spot."
>He grabs me with his powerful nerd hands and brings me over to a whiteboard
>I'm ready
>I sit down for Sheldon Cooper's lesson
>He explains theoretical physics to me
>It hurts my brain but I do it for Sheldon Cooper
>I can feel my mind expanding as my eyes start to water
>I take notes
>I want to please Sheldon Cooper
>He roars in a mighty roar as he fills my mind with his wisdom
>My dad walks in
>Sheldon Cooper looks him straight in the eyes and says "Bazinga."
>Sheldon Cooper leaves through my window
>Sheldon Cooper is love. Sheldon Cooper is life.
