Smogoff Bird Research Lab

[Plague von Karma]

For years, esteemed user monkfish has asked one simple question: what are birds? Despite his valiant research, he has only arrived at one simple answer: we just don't know.

We must band together and find out what these creatures are. Just what are birds?

To me, there is only one conclusion: birds aren't real.

​

Why, you ask? The government has replaced the 12 billion birds with surveillance drones. The reason they shit on your car every day is to lace them with liquidised tracking apparatus. They want to know your every move. Don't believe me? Do your own research. Monkfish knows too much and has been given a gag order. 1984 is upon us.

What are your theories? What are birds? Are birds real?

 

[Rugi]

hi

 

[Kiwi]

oh no we've been exposed

 

[Ununhexium]

We’re not real.

Source: I am a bird

 

[Plague von Karma]

hi

The government insider has revealed itself. It's only a matter of time before I'm taken away.

Stay strong, comrades.

 

[monkfish]

?

 

[zxgzxg]

All of the birds died in 1986 due to Reagan killing them, and replacing them with spies that are now watching us. The birds work for the Bourgeoisie.

 

[CaffeineBoost]

This is a very good thread for finding more about the class of birds in the animal kingdom
Please can somebody else make threads about the other two classes?

 

[Plague von Karma]

Something's up here and I'm gonna get to the bottom of it.

 

[Adeleine]

i actually didn't know what monkfish's avatar was until now

 

[CaffeineBoost]

This is a very good thread for finding more about the class of birds in the animal kingdom
Please can somebody else make threads about the other two classes?

you know I was really hoping somebody would pick up on me saying there were only 3 classes of animals

I had a wonderful joke about planes and superman ready

shame.

 

[かたわれ時]

Birds are real, we just don’t know if they’re really government drones in disguise

 

[BIG ASHLEY]

you know I was really hoping somebody would pick up on me saying there were only 3 classes of animals

I had a wonderful joke about planes and superman ready

shame.

man, i was like 99% sure the 3 was wrong, but i wasn't secure enough in my biology skills to dispute it. you absolutely pranked me there, if it makes you feel better...

 

[Plague von Karma]

Recently, we received word that esteemed user monkfish would rebrand to admired user mf. I believe that this was an attempt to escape the bourgeoisie aiming to silence those who know too much about birds. I believe in mf. I believe that one day, he will release his incredible research into birds.

Birds aren't real. We all know now. All we need to know now is...how did this come about? How were we fooled for so long? How deep does this conspiracy go?

 

[Unfunnydededenotxd]

As a bird (sort of, Dedede is a penguin so I guess he counts?), I can confirm we are illusions made to vandalize windshields.

 

[Plague von Karma]

We got em, boys! Birds aren't real!