Okay, this is a dumbass picture. But I have a fucking story to go with it. Preface: This was a time in my life when i was close to graduating HS (this is December of 2010), so I was partying like hell and I was on break for winter)
This is me at 17 years old. Looks pretty harmless, right? No. This picture pretty much represents the most crazy part of my life, ever.
My best friend was turning 18 that night, and so I was headed out to his birthday party. Slim pants? Check. Hella fly shirt? Fuckin check. And to top it off a goddamned Nightwing-black fedora hat (not pictured). I was looking fucking good. I'd had sex before, but I pretty much came on insertion. What can a guy do though?
Anyway, I hop in my car and head out to the venue. It's an old, old restaurant that has been shut down for at least 4 years. You can pay the guy who used to own it $20 and he'll let you do whatever the fuck you want in it for the night. Tonight, "whatever the fuck we want" was party out fucking skulls out
I get to the party, and it's just kind of heating up. Still pretty chill. I guess maybe 7 people there? He said that there would be ~100, so I'm pretty fucking excited. I've never been to a real party before. The only "party" that I had previously attended was when I went to a girl's in 3rd grade but it turned out her hamster died during the party so we all had to go home. First thing I notice is these two GIANT FUCKING HOT DOGS (one pictured). MY friend tells me that if someone can eat the whole thing they drink free for the whole night. Drinks were pretty cheap (maybe 2 bucks for a shot or beer? he had a couple of kegs there too), but I wanted a picture with the thing. It was, quite literally, 3 feet long.
My buddy asks me to help me clear out the tables post picture, and I oblige. But before we start, he asks me if I want some Ecstasy. I've never done drugs before but once i smoked some crushed up nutmeg and had a seizure, so I was wary. But he told me that it would be okay, so I took three decent sized tablets of X and got to moving.
Half an hour later, we were done. The X was kind of kicking in. About 30 people were there. Party was due to start in half an hour. I saw this insanely cute girl there, too. Maybe it was the drugs, but I knew right then in there that I would have sex tonight. And it would be glorious. And with this girl. And I wouldn't cum for at least fucking...i don't know, maybe 12 minutes or some shit but i'd thrust the whole fucking time
If that seems a bit crude, sorry, but that is EXACTLY the thought that went through my head. My buddy, being my best friend, let me drink free. So I started off the night with a shot of some black licorice liquor. It tasted like a fuckin snizz that hadn't been washed in 16 days. But I didn't care. There were at least 70 people there now, and I was rolling. I was high as FUCK from this X. Moreso, the lights were down and there were neons going everywhere. Speakers were blaring out music. I remember one song by MGMT playing and I thought it was the most beautiful thing that I'd ever heard.
I spotted my dream girl in the crowd. Later on I found out that her name was Elena. I was hard as fuck. Like, smell-your-sisters-panties-and-jerk-off hard. I went up and, it was total fucking pandemonium. People were dry humping. I'm pretty sure two guys came, because they were dancing super hard and then...stopped....and then kind of awkwardly left. W/e i can handle a little cum
So I take this girl by the hand, and I start grinding on her. She looks.....weird...like she isn't in her body. But I love her more than anything I've ever loved. I tell her to stop and we make our way through a crowd of 170 or so people to get out. Apparently people invited friends w/o the host telling them to so about 200 people showed up total.
I bring her outside where about 30 people are smoking. NBD, right? I sit down next to her and ask her her name, she tells me. Look, I gotta be honest. I was so goddamn hard at this point. I can't emphasize this enough. So here we are, talking, and she is so distant. Her pupils are huge. She has less iris than...than...she has less iris than earthworm has social skills. This dude comes up and offers us a hit of a joint. WHY THE FUCK NOT? I take a hit, and I feel it. It's so fucking rough, it's like swallowing an entire rabbit. I am Woozy as fuck. I'm spinning. The world is spinning. My head is not attached to my body anymore. And I'm blind. I literally can not see a goddamn thing. And one thought enters my mind: I have to get my clothes off. My clothes are made of bad. And bad is bad.
Luckily, though, my best friend comes in to calm me down. he sits me down. I drink a glass of beer and feel better. Except the arm of my shirt is torn and i don't know why. I am still dizzy and do not have motor skills. These come back to me later inthe night. He tells me that the party has calmed down and a lot of people are downstairs doing drugs. I feel a lot better at this point. I later found out that what I smoked was PCP, not marijuana. Whatever, I'm still rolling.
I go down to the den, and I'm fucking shocked. It's an orgy. And drugs. People are smoking some weird white substance and others are Fucking and Sucking their way across town. It's incredibly erotic, and I don't think that I can contain myself. I turn around to find my dream girl being TP'd by some dudes. And I fucking cum in my pants. That was probably the PCP though and not the premature ejaculation shit because i'm not a (BAN ME PLEASE) and i don't have problems with holding my cum. I really want to join in, but I'm scared. So I go up to one of the guys smoking and ask him what it is. And, I will never forget this dude's voice, he says in the sleepiest voice possible...Heroin
Heroin! I've never done that! MY rectum was really tight at this point, so I was kind of scared (this is b/c when my ass clenches it means i am nervous or something bad is about to happen. trust me. it's like fucking clairvoyance. i was about 2 go on a plane but my ass clenched and i said no and the plane crashed. scary shit). However, I didn't trust my ass so I asked him if i could shoot up as I was afraid of smoke really. He said yeah and picked up a needle. He added water to the smack, boiled it, and put it in cotton. Next thing I know he's in my vein and he indents the trigger. It felt like someone was deep inside me. Really deep. It was amazing. I crumpled into a heap onto the floor. My pants were still sticky and my cock flaccid, but I was so content. I remember watching those guys just go in and out of the girl i was talking about. I mean they were fucking railing her. It was mesmerizing.
I slowly got up. It felt like it took a thousand years to stand. I walked around a little and saw some guys rolling up a dollar bill. I asked them, slowly (or so i thought) what they were doing. "cocaine," the answer came back. I was already on PCP, Marijuana, Alcohol, Heroin, and Ecstasy. why the fuck not? I asked them to cut me a line and i snorted it. When combined with the other drugs it was euphoria. It was the most amazing feeling ever. My penis was rock hard. Rock hard. And before I knew it, I lost control of my prostate and cum just started flowing out of me until there were no more. I knew there was no more. I felt so incredibly empty inside. Now I know what it's like to not have some semen inyou.
I was crazy. Time sped to 500% and back to 45%. and then to 33%. I saw a man standing there. He looked so good. And I am ashamed to say this, but I desired him sexually. But I'm not a faglord. Fuck that.
I went up to him, and struck up a conversation. I had no idea the words that flew out of my mouth. They just came out, I didn't know what I was saying. Soon, though, he took me by the hand and led me to a secluded room. We both stripped nude. It was an amazing feeling, so free. He took me and layed me down gently. I did not want to have sex though, so I told him this. He said no, and I asked him to fight. He wasn't a very big dude, but he punched me in the face hard. I got woozy, and fell on the floor. I was so tired. I went to sleep.
. The next thing I remember was waking up in the middle of the forest, since there is always a forest next to you in Georgia. There was a lake close by. Nobody was in sight for my line of vision. I had a terrible headache and a gash across my chest. Next to me lay a dead deer with one antler torn off and a bloody...rag...thing....
My friend told me that I'd gotten up and done 3 shots of Jaegermeister, and smoked some more PCP. I'd wandered off into the woods with a girl. This is where the story gets fuzzy, since he heard secondhand from the girl. Apparently I had gone with the girl into the woods and we started having sex. Then, a deer came up to us. They are pretty domesticated around here b/c of all the people. I got very afraid and went apeshit on the thing. i knocked it unconscious (and acquired a chest gash?), and then fucking tore his skin at the chest. The girl got scared off at this point. So then I guess that I tore off an antler of this deer? I inspected the "rag" and from HS anatomy discerned it to be the heart. And I noticed the deer's chest cut open.
I went home and was incredibly sick for three days.
But was it worth it?
Yes.
[8:47pm] shade: so funny
[8:47pm] iconic: a 3some with them . . .
[8:47pm] iconic: man . .
[8:47pm] mind: so i was talking
[8:47pm] mind: to a girl from my class
[8:47pm] mind: and she was like
[8:47pm] badass: It looks like there is no demand
[8:47pm] mind: yeah cousins of each other
[8:47pm] badass: this story shall stay sealed
[8:47pm] mind: are my mom and dad
[8:47pm] mind: lmao
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: cmon badass i wanna hear it
[8:47pm] mind: badass
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: NO!
[8:47pm] mind: tell it
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: BADASS
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: say irt
[8:47pm] badass: ugh
[8:47pm] mind: i bet its something like
[8:47pm] badass: ok
[8:47pm] mind: it didnt happen
[8:47pm] badass: no
[8:47pm] badass: it did
[8:47pm] badass: for real
[8:47pm] mind: badass
[8:47pm] mind: tell us
[8:47pm] badass: ugh alright
[8:47pm] badass: i wasnt supposed to tell anyone
[8:47pm] badass: but
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: :)
[8:47pm] mind: THIS IS GONNA BE SO GOOD
[8:47pm] badass: okay, so EW
[8:47pm] mind: i also told shit
[8:47pm] badass: he's real quirky online right?
[8:48pm] badass: he is
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: wow :(
[8:48pm] badass: he's a fucking babe
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: why is he awful
[8:48pm] badass: he's really hot
[8:48pm] mind: badass
[8:48pm] badass: i'm not even joking
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: whys he awful worm
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: er
[8:48pm] mind: youre
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: mind*
[8:48pm] badass: i've seen him shirtless
[8:48pm] mind: bullshitting
[8:48pm] badass: im not
[8:48pm] badass: i mean
[8:48pm] badass: his face is ok
[8:48pm] shade: hahaha
[8:48pm] mind: go ahead
[8:48pm] badass: but he's bulky as shit
[8:48pm] badass: and cut too
[8:48pm] badass: it's fucking crazy
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: yeah mind
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: its true
[8:48pm] badass: i'd say he's like
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: i have him on facebook
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: no joke
[8:48pm] windsong_ left the chat room. (Quit: windsong_)
[8:48pm] badass: as cut as uragg
[8:48pm] badass: looks real skinny
[8:48pm] mind: me too
[8:48pm] badass: but underneat he's cut
[8:49pm] mind: but go ahead
[8:49pm] mind: badass
[8:49pm] ZAPDOS: wait mind
[8:49pm] badass: anyway so earthworm totally different irl
[8:49pm] ZAPDOS: but why did pana say
[8:49pm] ZAPDOS: 'hes awful'
[8:49pm] badass: so this one time, he was going to go to a concer
[8:49pm] ZAPDOS: lol
[8:49pm] badass: i believe it was a radiohead concert
[8:49pm] badass: pretty sure
[8:49pm] badass: nooooo wait
[8:49pm] badass: it was
[8:49pm] badass: crystal castles
[8:49pm] badass: srry
[8:49pm] badass: but it was in canberra
[8:49pm] badass: a couple hours away
[8:49pm] badass: so he gears up his car with a couple of friends when
[8:49pm] badass: he gets a text from
[8:49pm] badass: ~Mysterious Stallion~
[8:50pm] badass: worms had been talking about going to canberra earlier
[8:50pm] badass: and that's where MS lives
[8:50pm] badass: so he asked if he could come along
[8:50pm] badass: and worms agreed to pick him up
[8:50pm] badass: so they were driving
[8:50pm] badass: when the chick in the front seat
[8:50pm] badass: (worm was driving)
[8:50pm] badass: starts flirting heavy
[8:50pm] badass: like a lot
[8:50pm] badass: both ppl in the backseat were snoozin
[8:50pm] badass: so she just
[8:50pm] badass: whips his dick out
[8:50pm] badass: right there
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&ZAPDOS> earthworm
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&Earthworm|Away> or something
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&ZAPDOS> do you now
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&ZAPDOS> how to drive
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&ZAPDOS> know*
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&cbb> yeah i used
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&cbb> tab + enter
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&Earthworm|Away> no
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: lol
[8:51pm] badass: and starts giving him a dry handjob
[8:51pm] badass: hes bullshitting
[8:51pm] badass: anyway
[8:51pm] shade: oh man zapdos
[8:51pm] shade: we knew he was lying but
[8:51pm] badass: she's strokin the shaft
[8:51pm] shade: dotn ruin it :(
[8:51pm] ZAPDOS: we got him man
[8:51pm] badass: and worms is like
[8:51pm] badass: worms is about to cum
[8:51pm] badass: you know
[8:51pm] badass: vinegar strokes
[8:51pm] badass: he's pretty hot and bothered
[8:51pm] badass: so they are pretty close to MS now
[8:51pm] badass: and she just
[8:51pm] badass: she puts him back so to say
[8:51pm] badass: and hes horny as a wildabeast
[8:52pm] badass: so they drive by stallions house
[8:52pm] badass: and
[8:52pm] badass: stallion walks by the window
[8:52pm] badass: butt ass naked
[8:52pm] badass: he isnt dressed and his shades are up
[8:52pm] badass: so they are laughing at him
[8:52pm] mind: lol
[8:52pm] mind: this is
[8:52pm] mind: so much bs
[8:52pm] badass: everyone awake now
[8:52pm] mind: so much
[8:52pm] badass: its not
[8:52pm] badass: i swear to you
[8:52pm] badass: so stallion comes out
[8:52pm] mind: hahahahahhaha
[8:52pm] mind: lmao
[8:52pm] badass: and he shows EW some drugs
[8:52pm] badass: ecstasy
[8:52pm] badass: for the show
[8:52pm] ZAPDOS: lol
[8:52pm] badass: so worms decides to take it then
[8:52pm] mind: LOL
[8:53pm] badass: right then and there
[8:53pm] mind: im laughing so hard
[8:53pm] badass: i swear
[8:53pm] mind: out loud
[8:53pm] ZAPDOS: you shoulda written this on a pastebin
[8:53pm] badass: in front of god and everyone
[8:53pm] ZAPDOS: it woulda been even better
[8:53pm] badass: earthworm took MDMa
[8:53pm] badass: tell EW to
[8:53pm] mind: LOL
[8:53pm] mind: you're shitting
[8:53pm] mind: me
[8:53pm] badass: anyway
[8:53pm] badass: everyone is kinda
[8:53pm] badass: "rolling"
[8:53pm] badass: well
[8:53pm] badass: not yet
[8:53pm] badass: theyre on their way up
[8:53pm] Stathakis: man badass this is p cray
[8:53pm] Stathakis: i won't lie
[8:53pm] badass: and they arrive at the show
[8:53pm] mind: stathakis
[8:53pm] mind: do you call bs
[8:53pm] badass: mind u
[8:53pm] mind: or not
[8:53pm] badass: earthworm is expecting sex
[8:53pm] badass: b/c of the handjob
[8:53pm] badass: and sexual tension
[8:54pm] Stathakis: i am neither calling bs nor believing
[8:54pm] badass: so they give them their tickets
[8:54pm] Stathakis: just enjoying the story
[8:54pm] badass: stallion has to scalp one
[8:54pm] badass: and it was like...
[8:54pm] badass: 175 or sth crazy
[8:54pm] badass: really expensive
[8:54pm] badass: so they go in, and the first thing they see
[8:54pm] badass: is a t shirt vendor
[8:54pm] badass: so they decide to buy tee shirts
[8:54pm] badass: but they come up a couple bucks short
[8:54pm] badass: he lets them go anyway
[8:54pm] badass: so it was a nice dude
[8:55pm] mind: mhm
[8:55pm] badass: so the actual show starts
[8:55pm] badass: alice glass is up there
[8:55pm] badass: being alice glass
[8:55pm] badass: and there's a mosh pit in the center
[8:55pm] badass: so worms says, why don't we go mosh
[8:55pm] badass: everyone agrees and they decide to mosh
[8:55pm] shade: cliffhanger
[8:55pm] badass: so they're fucking
[8:55pm] badass: slam dancing
[8:55pm] badass: taking it to the extreme
[8:55pm] badass: i think worm dislocated his shoulder
[8:55pm] badass: no joke
[8:55pm] badass: and then a fight breaks out
[8:55pm] badass: in the middle of the mosh pit
[8:56pm] badass: it's a big dude
[8:56pm] badass: giant guy
[8:56pm] badass: black too
[8:56pm] badass: and he's up against this scrawny little white guy in a CC t shirt
[8:56pm] badass: so worms sees him and says
[8:56pm] badass: oh shit
[8:56pm] badass: thats the t shirt vender
[8:56pm] badass: so him and stallion go up to a giant muscled black guy
[8:56pm] badass: and tell him to shove it up his arse
[8:56pm] badass: idk what it was
[8:56pm] badass: i assume
[8:56pm] badass: its a manner of speech
[8:56pm] badass: so the guy says no
[8:57pm] badass: and they get to fighting
[8:57pm] badass: so now its 2 slightly muscly white dudes
[8:57pm] badass: and 1 skinny one
[8:57pm] badass: vs a giant black guy
[8:57pm] badass: and worms is going APESHIT
[8:57pm] badass: i mean, another level
[8:57pm] badass: he starts like
[8:57pm] badass: playing dirty
[8:57pm] badass: he punches the dude in the groin
[8:57pm] badass: and then
[8:57pm] badass: he bites him in the chest
[8:57pm] badass: and got half of this guys nipple
[8:57pm] badass: i am serious
[8:57pm] badass: completely
[8:58pm] badass: the big black man realizes what happened
[8:58pm] badass: and just runs away
[8:58pm] badass: so here worm has
[8:58pm] badass: a half of a black nipple
[8:58pm] badass: no idea what to do with it
[8:58pm] badass: so he goes into the porta potty to toss it
[8:58pm] badass: and take a dump
[8:58pm] badass: so he is in there taking a big shit
[8:58pm] badass: when the girl from earlier comes in
[8:58pm] badass: making out with stallion
[8:58pm] badass: and his dick is out
[8:59pm] badass: she looks down and
[8:59pm] badass: she sees who is in the stall
[8:59pm] badass: it's fucking earthworm
[8:59pm] badass: she panics and she falls
[8:59pm] badass: and the whole fucking thing
[8:59pm] badass: topples over
[8:59pm] badass: and piss and shit fall out
[8:59pm] badass: bay
[8:59pm] badass: nay*
[8:59pm] badass: spill out
[8:59pm] badass: onto everyone
[8:59pm] badass: so here is stallion, ew's friend, and EW
[8:59pm] badass: covered in shit
[8:59pm] badass: they go get the rest of their friends
[8:59pm] badass: and drive to a gas station
[8:59pm] badass: and clean up
[9:00pm] badass: EW still has the half nipple
[9:00pm] badass: ask him
[9:00pm] badass: but yeah
[9:00pm] badass: that's how fucking crazy EW is
[8:47pm] iconic: a 3some with them . . .
[8:47pm] iconic: man . .
[8:47pm] mind: so i was talking
[8:47pm] mind: to a girl from my class
[8:47pm] mind: and she was like
[8:47pm] badass: It looks like there is no demand
[8:47pm] mind: yeah cousins of each other
[8:47pm] badass: this story shall stay sealed
[8:47pm] mind: are my mom and dad
[8:47pm] mind: lmao
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: cmon badass i wanna hear it
[8:47pm] mind: badass
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: NO!
[8:47pm] mind: tell it
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: BADASS
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: say irt
[8:47pm] badass: ugh
[8:47pm] mind: i bet its something like
[8:47pm] badass: ok
[8:47pm] mind: it didnt happen
[8:47pm] badass: no
[8:47pm] badass: it did
[8:47pm] badass: for real
[8:47pm] mind: badass
[8:47pm] mind: tell us
[8:47pm] badass: ugh alright
[8:47pm] badass: i wasnt supposed to tell anyone
[8:47pm] badass: but
[8:47pm] ZAPDOS: :)
[8:47pm] mind: THIS IS GONNA BE SO GOOD
[8:47pm] badass: okay, so EW
[8:47pm] mind: i also told shit
[8:47pm] badass: he's real quirky online right?
[8:48pm] badass: he is
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: wow :(
[8:48pm] badass: he's a fucking babe
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: why is he awful
[8:48pm] badass: he's really hot
[8:48pm] mind: badass
[8:48pm] badass: i'm not even joking
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: whys he awful worm
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: er
[8:48pm] mind: youre
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: mind*
[8:48pm] badass: i've seen him shirtless
[8:48pm] mind: bullshitting
[8:48pm] badass: im not
[8:48pm] badass: i mean
[8:48pm] badass: his face is ok
[8:48pm] shade: hahaha
[8:48pm] mind: go ahead
[8:48pm] badass: but he's bulky as shit
[8:48pm] badass: and cut too
[8:48pm] badass: it's fucking crazy
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: yeah mind
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: its true
[8:48pm] badass: i'd say he's like
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: i have him on facebook
[8:48pm] ZAPDOS: no joke
[8:48pm] windsong_ left the chat room. (Quit: windsong_)
[8:48pm] badass: as cut as uragg
[8:48pm] badass: looks real skinny
[8:48pm] mind: me too
[8:48pm] badass: but underneat he's cut
[8:49pm] mind: but go ahead
[8:49pm] mind: badass
[8:49pm] ZAPDOS: wait mind
[8:49pm] badass: anyway so earthworm totally different irl
[8:49pm] ZAPDOS: but why did pana say
[8:49pm] ZAPDOS: 'hes awful'
[8:49pm] badass: so this one time, he was going to go to a concer
[8:49pm] ZAPDOS: lol
[8:49pm] badass: i believe it was a radiohead concert
[8:49pm] badass: pretty sure
[8:49pm] badass: nooooo wait
[8:49pm] badass: it was
[8:49pm] badass: crystal castles
[8:49pm] badass: srry
[8:49pm] badass: but it was in canberra
[8:49pm] badass: a couple hours away
[8:49pm] badass: so he gears up his car with a couple of friends when
[8:49pm] badass: he gets a text from
[8:49pm] badass: ~Mysterious Stallion~
[8:50pm] badass: worms had been talking about going to canberra earlier
[8:50pm] badass: and that's where MS lives
[8:50pm] badass: so he asked if he could come along
[8:50pm] badass: and worms agreed to pick him up
[8:50pm] badass: so they were driving
[8:50pm] badass: when the chick in the front seat
[8:50pm] badass: (worm was driving)
[8:50pm] badass: starts flirting heavy
[8:50pm] badass: like a lot
[8:50pm] badass: both ppl in the backseat were snoozin
[8:50pm] badass: so she just
[8:50pm] badass: whips his dick out
[8:50pm] badass: right there
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&ZAPDOS> earthworm
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&Earthworm|Away> or something
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&ZAPDOS> do you now
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&ZAPDOS> how to drive
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&ZAPDOS> know*
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&cbb> yeah i used
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&cbb> tab + enter
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: [20:51] <&Earthworm|Away> no
[8:50pm] ZAPDOS: lol
[8:51pm] badass: and starts giving him a dry handjob
[8:51pm] badass: hes bullshitting
[8:51pm] badass: anyway
[8:51pm] shade: oh man zapdos
[8:51pm] shade: we knew he was lying but
[8:51pm] badass: she's strokin the shaft
[8:51pm] shade: dotn ruin it :(
[8:51pm] ZAPDOS: we got him man
[8:51pm] badass: and worms is like
[8:51pm] badass: worms is about to cum
[8:51pm] badass: you know
[8:51pm] badass: vinegar strokes
[8:51pm] badass: he's pretty hot and bothered
[8:51pm] badass: so they are pretty close to MS now
[8:51pm] badass: and she just
[8:51pm] badass: she puts him back so to say
[8:51pm] badass: and hes horny as a wildabeast
[8:52pm] badass: so they drive by stallions house
[8:52pm] badass: and
[8:52pm] badass: stallion walks by the window
[8:52pm] badass: butt ass naked
[8:52pm] badass: he isnt dressed and his shades are up
[8:52pm] badass: so they are laughing at him
[8:52pm] mind: lol
[8:52pm] mind: this is
[8:52pm] mind: so much bs
[8:52pm] badass: everyone awake now
[8:52pm] mind: so much
[8:52pm] badass: its not
[8:52pm] badass: i swear to you
[8:52pm] badass: so stallion comes out
[8:52pm] mind: hahahahahhaha
[8:52pm] mind: lmao
[8:52pm] badass: and he shows EW some drugs
[8:52pm] badass: ecstasy
[8:52pm] badass: for the show
[8:52pm] ZAPDOS: lol
[8:52pm] badass: so worms decides to take it then
[8:52pm] mind: LOL
[8:53pm] badass: right then and there
[8:53pm] mind: im laughing so hard
[8:53pm] badass: i swear
[8:53pm] mind: out loud
[8:53pm] ZAPDOS: you shoulda written this on a pastebin
[8:53pm] badass: in front of god and everyone
[8:53pm] ZAPDOS: it woulda been even better
[8:53pm] badass: earthworm took MDMa
[8:53pm] badass: tell EW to
[8:53pm] mind: LOL
[8:53pm] mind: you're shitting
[8:53pm] mind: me
[8:53pm] badass: anyway
[8:53pm] badass: everyone is kinda
[8:53pm] badass: "rolling"
[8:53pm] badass: well
[8:53pm] badass: not yet
[8:53pm] badass: theyre on their way up
[8:53pm] Stathakis: man badass this is p cray
[8:53pm] Stathakis: i won't lie
[8:53pm] badass: and they arrive at the show
[8:53pm] mind: stathakis
[8:53pm] mind: do you call bs
[8:53pm] badass: mind u
[8:53pm] mind: or not
[8:53pm] badass: earthworm is expecting sex
[8:53pm] badass: b/c of the handjob
[8:53pm] badass: and sexual tension
[8:54pm] Stathakis: i am neither calling bs nor believing
[8:54pm] badass: so they give them their tickets
[8:54pm] Stathakis: just enjoying the story
[8:54pm] badass: stallion has to scalp one
[8:54pm] badass: and it was like...
[8:54pm] badass: 175 or sth crazy
[8:54pm] badass: really expensive
[8:54pm] badass: so they go in, and the first thing they see
[8:54pm] badass: is a t shirt vendor
[8:54pm] badass: so they decide to buy tee shirts
[8:54pm] badass: but they come up a couple bucks short
[8:54pm] badass: he lets them go anyway
[8:54pm] badass: so it was a nice dude
[8:55pm] mind: mhm
[8:55pm] badass: so the actual show starts
[8:55pm] badass: alice glass is up there
[8:55pm] badass: being alice glass
[8:55pm] badass: and there's a mosh pit in the center
[8:55pm] badass: so worms says, why don't we go mosh
[8:55pm] badass: everyone agrees and they decide to mosh
[8:55pm] shade: cliffhanger
[8:55pm] badass: so they're fucking
[8:55pm] badass: slam dancing
[8:55pm] badass: taking it to the extreme
[8:55pm] badass: i think worm dislocated his shoulder
[8:55pm] badass: no joke
[8:55pm] badass: and then a fight breaks out
[8:55pm] badass: in the middle of the mosh pit
[8:56pm] badass: it's a big dude
[8:56pm] badass: giant guy
[8:56pm] badass: black too
[8:56pm] badass: and he's up against this scrawny little white guy in a CC t shirt
[8:56pm] badass: so worms sees him and says
[8:56pm] badass: oh shit
[8:56pm] badass: thats the t shirt vender
[8:56pm] badass: so him and stallion go up to a giant muscled black guy
[8:56pm] badass: and tell him to shove it up his arse
[8:56pm] badass: idk what it was
[8:56pm] badass: i assume
[8:56pm] badass: its a manner of speech
[8:56pm] badass: so the guy says no
[8:57pm] badass: and they get to fighting
[8:57pm] badass: so now its 2 slightly muscly white dudes
[8:57pm] badass: and 1 skinny one
[8:57pm] badass: vs a giant black guy
[8:57pm] badass: and worms is going APESHIT
[8:57pm] badass: i mean, another level
[8:57pm] badass: he starts like
[8:57pm] badass: playing dirty
[8:57pm] badass: he punches the dude in the groin
[8:57pm] badass: and then
[8:57pm] badass: he bites him in the chest
[8:57pm] badass: and got half of this guys nipple
[8:57pm] badass: i am serious
[8:57pm] badass: completely
[8:58pm] badass: the big black man realizes what happened
[8:58pm] badass: and just runs away
[8:58pm] badass: so here worm has
[8:58pm] badass: a half of a black nipple
[8:58pm] badass: no idea what to do with it
[8:58pm] badass: so he goes into the porta potty to toss it
[8:58pm] badass: and take a dump
[8:58pm] badass: so he is in there taking a big shit
[8:58pm] badass: when the girl from earlier comes in
[8:58pm] badass: making out with stallion
[8:58pm] badass: and his dick is out
[8:59pm] badass: she looks down and
[8:59pm] badass: she sees who is in the stall
[8:59pm] badass: it's fucking earthworm
[8:59pm] badass: she panics and she falls
[8:59pm] badass: and the whole fucking thing
[8:59pm] badass: topples over
[8:59pm] badass: and piss and shit fall out
[8:59pm] badass: bay
[8:59pm] badass: nay*
[8:59pm] badass: spill out
[8:59pm] badass: onto everyone
[8:59pm] badass: so here is stallion, ew's friend, and EW
[8:59pm] badass: covered in shit
[8:59pm] badass: they go get the rest of their friends
[8:59pm] badass: and drive to a gas station
[8:59pm] badass: and clean up
[9:00pm] badass: EW still has the half nipple
[9:00pm] badass: ask him
[9:00pm] badass: but yeah
[9:00pm] badass: that's how fucking crazy EW is
