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I would invest in more fat food places, so that obesity rates would be higher in every part of the world.
This would lead to complications like diabetes and lack of good taste.
I would raid smogon university with 23,000 swinubs for 1 million dollars, which would be dangerous because me posting this has likely already prompted those at smogon university to prepare for the situation in which they are attacked by approximately 23,000 baby mammoths.