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Don't end up stressing over it dude, everybody ends up making mistakes. I'm sorry that people were so hostile about everything, but tbh just ignore them. Welcome to Smogon and I hope you get everything sorted out for yourself.
ignoring is a lot harder than it sounds. i used to be bullied and was told to just ignore. you know what they did? beat me up. and the teachers didnt do anything. so to avoid further confusion, and possibly a form of cyberbullying, i am just requesting a name change. seems like a valid reason to me.
I mean you can literally ignore them if you want to so you can't see their messages (there's a button on their profile you can click) if they're being abusive.
Changing your name would probably be the way to go, but if I were you I wouldn't change it to your actual name, simply to avoid any more privacy issues.