hey guys, i'm here to tell you how to grow your trading dick two inches overnight to get it to a total size of four inches. what qualifies me, you ask? well i'm glad you did, here's my experience:
- made €100k USD on bitconnect, which has been put to good use to pay off various fees involved in moving blood diamond money out of nigerian royalty's bank accounts in benin (geopolitics, don't get me started)
- currently have £50k sitting in a bank account earning 0.1% interest as a long-term, low-risk savings option
- all in on TSLA calls, $450 expiring on 2020/09/12
so here's the rub:
1. don't lose more than you can afford to invest. Seriously. Every penny lost is a penny not invested. Gains my brudda.
2. buy the fucking dip. I don't need to say this. then tell everyone else to so you can sell at a higher price than you bought.
2b. don't break the law. the difference between a pyramid scheme and investing is that one is illegal and one isn't. don't do the illegal one.
3. diversify. i have a 12-inch penis but even that doesn't mean I go and put all my money on MSFT. Put some money aside for some other promising projects like SPCE.
4. buy the fucking dip. ENRON is at an all-time low. Strong buy+++
5. Let your winners ride. TSLA up 600% this year? Take that shit to the moon. Nothing else is gonna give you the gains to get out of your mom's basement. Don't listen to the finance trolls who tell you to rebalance your portfolio.
6. Leverage, baby. How are you gonna take the government's $1k check and turn it into a retirement fund quickly enough for you to actually use it. Margin trading, derivatives, taking loans out against your relatives' organs. Leverage so high it would give Archimedes a boner.
7. you gotta spend money to make money. go ahead and pay $30 a month for market data that you're too stoopid to understand, and take advice off a random internet person with a black guy in his avatar instead. the sunk cost fallacy will eventually kick in and you too, will learn how to read. even if it's just the notifications from the app which effectively tell you "YOUR SAVINGS ARE FUCKED" in red letters and a bunch of numbers
you can post in this thread but please be advised that your reaction count and go up as well as down
- made €100k USD on bitconnect, which has been put to good use to pay off various fees involved in moving blood diamond money out of nigerian royalty's bank accounts in benin (geopolitics, don't get me started)
- currently have £50k sitting in a bank account earning 0.1% interest as a long-term, low-risk savings option
- all in on TSLA calls, $450 expiring on 2020/09/12
so here's the rub:
1. don't lose more than you can afford to invest. Seriously. Every penny lost is a penny not invested. Gains my brudda.
2. buy the fucking dip. I don't need to say this. then tell everyone else to so you can sell at a higher price than you bought.
2b. don't break the law. the difference between a pyramid scheme and investing is that one is illegal and one isn't. don't do the illegal one.
3. diversify. i have a 12-inch penis but even that doesn't mean I go and put all my money on MSFT. Put some money aside for some other promising projects like SPCE.
4. buy the fucking dip. ENRON is at an all-time low. Strong buy+++
5. Let your winners ride. TSLA up 600% this year? Take that shit to the moon. Nothing else is gonna give you the gains to get out of your mom's basement. Don't listen to the finance trolls who tell you to rebalance your portfolio.
6. Leverage, baby. How are you gonna take the government's $1k check and turn it into a retirement fund quickly enough for you to actually use it. Margin trading, derivatives, taking loans out against your relatives' organs. Leverage so high it would give Archimedes a boner.
7. you gotta spend money to make money. go ahead and pay $30 a month for market data that you're too stoopid to understand, and take advice off a random internet person with a black guy in his avatar instead. the sunk cost fallacy will eventually kick in and you too, will learn how to read. even if it's just the notifications from the app which effectively tell you "YOUR SAVINGS ARE FUCKED" in red letters and a bunch of numbers
you can post in this thread but please be advised that your reaction count and go up as well as down
S T O P
And I think it's expensive. Pay attention to the expression on its face, this camel knows exactly what it's worth! In fact, I am interested in the topic of investment and I believe that good camels or thoroughbred horses deserve investment and can bring a lot of profit in the future. I also believe that 
