D/P Wi-Fi Warstory: Me vs. my friend Manny

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Hippowdon_90210

My friend Manny from a Pokemon league I go to owed me a battle from a favor I did for him, so I figured that since I had a new team I wanted to test this would be a good time to use it.

I got on Wi-Fi and set the invitation, and off we went.

My Team:
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Manny's Team:
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Manny sent out Dusknoir!
I sent out Metagross!
Dusknoir is exerting it's pressure!

Seeing the Will-o-Wisp coming, I promptly switched out the metal giant.

Yugi withdrew Metagross!
Yugi sent out Machamp!
Dusknoir used Will-o-Wisp!
Machamp was burned!

I was in a good position right now with my Guts boost.

Machamp used Stone Edge! (About 60% damage)
Dusknoir used Ice Punch!
Critical Hit! (about 100 damage)
Machamp is hurt by it's burn!
Machamp restored it's HP a little using leftovers!

Machamp used Stone Edge! (About 40% damage)
Dusknoir fainted!
Machamp is hurt by it's burn!
Machamp restored it's HP a little using leftovers!
Manny sent out Gliscor!

Seeing the bat come in scared off my wrestling champion, so I had to send out a dragon.

Yugi withdrew Machamp!
Yugi sent out Dragonite!
Gliscor used Aerial Ace! (100 damage)

Dragonite used Dragon Dance!
Dragonite's attack rose!
Dragonite's speed rose!
Gliscor used Substitute!

Dragonite used Outrage!
Gliscor's substitute faded!
Gliscor used Aerial Ace! (90 damage)

Dragonite used Outrage! (about 65% damage)
Gliscor used Aerial Ace! (100 damage)
Dragonite became confused due to fatigue!
Dragonite's Lum Berry cured it of Confusion!

Not wanting to risk a 2 turn go, I decided to take my chances with accuracy.

Dragonite used Fire Blast!
Gliscor fainted!

Out came a computer virus thingy!

Manny sent out Porygon-Z!
Dragonite used Outrage! (100% damage)
Porygon-Z fainted!

With the virus gone, I was once again able to turn of McAfee and get back to the battle (lol).

Out came an electric devil, trying to ruin my fun!

Manny sent out Electivire!
Dragonite used Outrage! (100% damage)
Electivire fainted!
Dragonite became confused due to fatigue!

Then things twisted when he sent out a metal puppy!

Manny sent out Lucario!
Dragonite hurt itself in it's confusion!
Dragonite fainted!

Well, that didn't pay off very well. Time to send in my super computer!

Yugi sent out Metagross!
Metagross used Earthquake! (100% damage)
Lucario fainted!

Choice Scarf really helped me out there.

Suddenly out of nowhere, a poisonus plant came out! It stared at my Metagross as if it had a problem with it, which pissed the super computer off.

Metagross used Earthquake! (about 80% damage)
Roserade used Shadow Ball!
A critical hit! (200 damage)

I knew now that my super computer could annihalate the weed, so I attacked again.

Metagross used Earthquake!
Roserade fainted!

The super computer finished off the match by killing a puppy and a weed, which made it extremely satisfied.

Props:
- Metagross and Dragonite for winning the entire game.
- Outrage for being pure awesomeness.
- Machamp for saving me a few turns by killing the annoying ghost.
- Winning 5-0.

Slops:
- Not being able to kill 5 pokes with my dragon due to fatigue.
- None of my Pokemon being shiny while Manny had 3 shinies. :P

If you want to battle me send me a PM. It'll be difficult since you'll know my team, but oh well. :P
 
Warstories are usually...how to put this...closer, and don't involve you killing your only casualty. Not that I'm complaining, I was really just expecting something more even.

Also, you forgot the *BLING BLING* everytime Lucario, Dusknoir, and Porygon-Z appear because of their Shinyness. Does Manny hack?

Overall, try and find a better opponent next time...

PS: For slops, you forgot to put "Didn't annoy opponent with retarded pink egg"
 
Er...kind of a poor warstory. This battle doesn't seem to be anything worth writing about (where's the excitement in a 5-0 win?), and your opponent didn't seem to have any idea what to do with his team. The comments after every move were more annoying than amusing, mainly because they were straining to stretch a generally uneventful match into something it wasn't, namely exciting. A good warstory should be a back-and-forth battle between players of roughly equal skill, in which prediction and unexpected movesets play a large part. This story doesn't fit that description.
 
Extremely one-sided and --personally-- I don't care to hear warstories about base 600s or Gyrados or something owning a team practically 6-0. Not to discourage you from writing warstories, but this battle really wasn't worth writing about.
 
Good warstories aren't really turn-by-turn, but section-by-section. It's a good first warstory, but try not to report every little thing.
 
What really pissed me off about this warstory is that you didn't just refer to things. You couldn't just say (example), "Swampert ate Breloom's Seed Bomb
and died." Noooo, you had to say, " The water mudfish bravely took a hit from the mushroom dinosaur." And then you thought up new stupid titles. Don't waste your time and our time by writing these idiotic little asides (i.e. metal puppy). Just say the name of the Pokémon.

I'm sorry I'm so horribly mean and critical on this, it's just really bad writing and a boring battle.
 
Hippowdon_90210 said:
Slops:
- Not being able to kill 5 pokes with my dragon due to fatigue.
- None of my Pokemon being shiny while Manny had 3 shinies.
-Porygon-Z not sweeping at least half your team
Click to expand...

Fix'd

I was really looking forward to a warstory with some Porygon-Z ownage, but it didn't happen. Guess I'll have to fight a war story worthy battle of my own then.

Overall, you pretty much just OHKO'd his entire team, not very exciting IMO, although it must've been cool seeing your new team own like that.
 
Who new ''computer monster eats puppy!'' could be the most boring newsflash ever?

Props on 5-0ing with overuseds, I guess? ;/
 
I was kind of hoping someone else would do this but clearly I have to...

This is a really boring war story. It's good that you attempted to make one because we need more war stories, but this is brief, lopsided, and uninteresting. Generally speaking exciting, close battles make the best war stories and this was neither of those things. Locking.
 
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