Feeling Trapped?

Sklez

I realise this post is very long so if you want to get to the point of this thread, scroll down to the last paragraph.

Several months ago, the students in year 10 at my high school were given the opportunity to participate in a school-organised trip to Vietnam and Cambodia sometime in June-July 2008. I was really excited by this because, so far, my life has been pretty easygoing bordering on mundane. This trip seemed like a great way for me to have a rewarding experience and also do what I can to help out some of the least privileged people in the world.

My excitement was squashed however when I brought this idea to my parents as they would rather die then allow me to leave the safety of our home. I have trouble understanding their view on this because, even though I am only fifteen years of age presently, this trip is a good year away and it had been run several times at my school with no problems whatsoever.

The qualms they had involved my safety in Cambodia and Vietnam. I realise I should be grateful for having parents that care this much about me but in this situation they have gone too far. Through this website and IRC I know of several people who have visited or even live in these countries and have come to the conclusion that the trip is completely safe.

Don't get me wrong, there are some negative things I can see about the trip, I am not completely ignorant. One of these is the $3400 (Australian) price tag. Now I have nowhere near this amount of money and would have to either ask my parents, or get a job to pay for it and was completely willing to do so. You'd think that if I were to get a job, it would show enough maturity to prove I would be able to handle myself overseas. But no, they were still unswayed.

It is now too late to apply for this trip. Currently I am feeling trapped as there is no foreseeable end to my routine. As I said am only in my tenth schooling year of 12 so my workload will only increase over the next few years. On the upside though I have plenty of time ahead of me and I plan to travel after I finish school. Then again, I could easily be locked into university and settle down without ever accomplishing this.

I guess what I am trying to ask is do you think I am being unreasonable and downright stupid? Should I be counting myself lucky that I even have these opportunities open to me and shut up? Do I have a reason to be resentful and annoyed?

I'll get to my main question in this thread now- Do you feel trapped or stuck? Do you have any plans or aspirations that they are unable to accomplish, possibly due to more adult reasons than my somewhat childish ones? If so what are they? I would really like to hear everyone's answers and it may help me come to terms with my own missed opportunity.
 
I can see what your problem is but you've got to understand this is parents you're talking about. The worry of a parent can be strong enough to overcome an immense amount of decent reasoning, and if it is that is a sign (both a good and a possibly bad one). You aren't unreasonable, but neither are your parents. Later on you'll be able to do all the trippin' you want, moreso if you properly finish school and all.

I am not constricted or trapped ever in this way. Most of my trips are totally "planned" last minute and my parents just allowed them, but they were still worried about me when I missed the plane back from Cambridge. I suppose you could say I'm lucky.
 
I used to feel much the same way until I got into competitive videogaming and playing for MLG. After a few years of traveling and staying in free hotels and whatnot it phased out of me. I'll probably come and go.

On the other hand, I don't recommend staying home being bored, that can't be healthy either. Take a personal vacation to NYC or some other major city for a week, and most importantly go by yourself or with some friends. This doesn't mean to be stupid with your travels, stay safe, but the idea is to have some alone time in a new and exciting place.

When I hit 18, I moved into an apart,emt and quit my job and went to tournaments every weekend and amassed $4000 after rent and travel expenses and food and everything. I used it for my first semester of college. I don't recommend this lol but you get the idea.

Do something different.
 
I hitch-hiked across Europe at the age of 18 with two friends, my parents thought it was a great idea.

I'm at uni now, so that may be why they are more open about this kind of thing. They know I can handle myself, so they give me free reign as long as I'm paying ;)

also your parents can't lock you up, the only way they can prevent you from going anywhere is if parental consent is required (like on a school trip). you can always work up the money and go with a travel buddy and do the things YOU want to do
 
hrm. i had something similar like this when i was presented with the opportunity to be part of a student exchange program, i did feel that i missed the opportunity to make new friends, and strengthen old friendships. but yeah, i couldnt go. period. i know i did miss out on a huge opportunity, but a few weeks ago i got to host a german exchange student anyway for cultural exchange. although i didnt get to see munich or paris, i did get to make some new friends.
now your vietnam cambodia thing is probably different, but somehow there will always be more opportunities.
im still pissed off at my parents, because i am a bad child. but that doesnt mean you should hold a grudge, it may seem unfair, but to them, it probably seems unfair that you should want to do something, in their opinion so dangerous
 
Mekkah said:
I can see what your problem is but you've got to understand this is parents you're talking about. The worry of a parent can be strong enough to overcome an immense amount of decent reasoning, and if it is that is a sign (both a good and a possibly bad one). You aren't unreasonable, but neither are your parents. Later on you'll be able to do all the trippin' you want, moreso if you properly finish school and all.
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You're right, if I were to go I'm sure the whole time I was away they would be constantly worrying. Its hard being in the powerless situation I am in now but deffinately in the next couple of years I can see it getting better.

sxcdude said:
im still pissed off at my parents, because i am a bad child. but that doesnt mean you should hold a grudge, it may seem unfair, but to them, it probably seems unfair that you should want to do something, in their opinion so dangerous
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Our situations are fairly simillar. I am also pissed off but I dont think they would find it unfair per se as it is their decision. There is deffinately no way I am able to hold a grudge because they are my parents of course, the amount of stuff they have done for me is unmeasureable really.

Ultimately you give less thought to these things over time, but never really get over it. Personally it seems I am much younger than many people here so have plenty of time to make up for it, its just presently, it would have been nice to have something to look forward to.
 
Wow, my parents would really love you. They're seriously pushing me to do stuff, get out there, go abroad, etc. For instance, two years ago I really didn't want to go on a scuba diving trip, but I really didn't protest strongly enough and my parents paid for it without asking me if I really wanted to go or not. It was a good experience, but I consider it one that shows that my parents are the ambitious ones and I'm the one who prefers to stay home.
 
m0nkfish said:
also your parents can't lock you up, the only way they can prevent you from going anywhere is if parental consent is required (like on a school trip). you can always work up the money and go with a travel buddy and do the things YOU want to do
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He's in tenth grade. Just getting together with a buddy and going to vietnam probably isn't a great idea.
 
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