Prepare for trouble! RMT for doubles!

Prepare for trouble!
My team of doubles!
To protect the world from devistation!
My foes are the targets of annihilation!

...nevermind.
Any-ways, I thought of this team when I saw one of Gigatitan's videos on YouTube. This team takes advantage of the 'Absorb' abilities, except for the last one, who is purely for One Hit Knock Outs.

Before rating my team, you should read this:


When using this team, no clauses are in effect. Wanna lower my evasion to -6? Be my guest. Double Team forever? Do it! Feel like putting everyone to sleep? That's fine. Paralasys? Sure! Team of six ubers? That's okay, too. OHKOing me? I'd be a hypocrite to say no!

If it can be legally done in the game, you can do it, and I won't care.
Don't tell me any OHKO clause or anything, it is part of the game, so it's fair game with me. Once again, IF IT CAN LEGALLY BE DONE IN THE GAME, IT IS OKAY WITH ME!
The clauses are completely idiotic and, IMHO, are the byproduct of some n00b who doesn't want to lose because he's unlucky and is too bad of a player to play Pokémon well.
If you get upset about me sweeping your team with OHKOs, please hold the 'Alt' button and then hit the 'F4' button.



And that is my rant for today.
Now, let's continue on to my incredibly haxxy team. :D
Keep in mind, this team is forDOUBLE BATTLES!!Also, the pairs(hopefully) are:



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(Start with Jolteon and Lanturn)

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(Jolteon dies; replaced with Vaporeon)

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(Lanturn "" Lapras)

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(Vaporeon "" Politoed)

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(Lapras dies; replaced with Kyogre)









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Jolteon@Magnet

Volt Absorb

Timid

4 Def, 252 Sp.Atk, 252 HP

Discharge
Wish
Toxic
Substitute

Half of my doubles lead is the ever-popular Jolteon! *roaring cheers from Eeveelution fangirls* My strategy with Jolteon is Substitute first turn, as will Lanturn. Then Discharge second turn, as will Lanturn, and then Toxic any Ground counters, Substitute if Sub has fallen already, or Wish/Discharge(depending on my mood). I'm thinking of switching Magnet to Focus Sash, but I don't know...


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Lanturn@Zap Plate

Volt Absorb

Timid

4 Def, 252 Sp.Atk, 252 HP

Discharge
Aqua Ring
Substitute
Surf

All right! Lead, part the dos. Lanturn's strategy is about the same as Jolteons: Sub up, Discharge to heal him, then either Sub(if it fell), Aqua Ring(If I feel like it. :P) or Discharge. I have Surf on Lanturn to help the next three Pokémon to come in... and I hope Lanturn durvives long enough to aid them.


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Vaporeon@Life Orb

Water Absorb

Timid

4 Def, 252 Sp.Atk, 252 HP

Surf
Substitute
Wish
Swift/Icy Wind/Blizzard

...and here comes ANOTHER Eeveelution. Except this time, she's... well... good. :P Same strategy as ever at first: Sub up. But then we use Swift/Icy Wind/Blizzard! The reason for this is so we don't hurt our partner while still hurting the enemies. The reason Rain Dance was taken out is because Kyogre's Drizzle makes it sort of useless. Swift, Icy Wind and Blizzard were all good choices. Swift because it has a solid 60 base power, ALWAYS hits both foes and it hits all but Ghost, Rock and Steel types for neutral damage.
Icy Wind and Blizzard are options, too, since they hit Dragons, Flying, Grass and Ground for double damage, and combined with Surf, the only thing Vaporoen won't hit for at least neutral damage is a Water type.
With the Life Orb, Wish will be used often just in case.




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Lapras@Splash Plate

Water Absorb

Timid

4 Def, 252 Sp.Atk, 252 HP

Surf
Substitute
Confuse Ray
Toxic

Hopefully by the time we get to Lapras, we have Jolteon and Lanturn dead and have Vaporeon out and ready. We use Substitute, then Confuse Ray/Toxic/Surf. Whichever. Surf if Vaporeon needs health, Confuse Ray if we want to confuse annoying enemies and Toxic to poison stuff.


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Politoed@Leftovers

Water Absorb

Timid

4 Def, 252 Sp.Atk, 252 HP

Surf
Substitute
Mind Reader
Mimic

Getting down to the wire now, and the first two moves are obvious. I barely need any description of them. But Mind Reader and Mimic, What the...?
Believe me, at this late in the game, we might need these. But not until Vaporeon and Lapras go down. Because then all we have are Politoed and...



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Kyogre@Leftovers

Drizzle

Timid

4 Sp.Def, 252 Def, 252 HP

Substitute
Sheer Cold
Mimic
Surf


I suppose you know what we're doing now.
Everything before this was just wearing the foe out. If they survive up until now with 3+ Pokémon, they're either VERY good, VERY lucky or I suck!
The third option is most likely...

Anyways, the strategy is for Kyogre to set up a Substitute while Politoed either Subs(if he needs it) or uses Mind Reader on anything.
Kyogre then uses Mimic on Politoed after Toed uses Mind Reader. KYOGRE NEEDS TO LEARN MIND READER. Toed uses.... whatever now. Probably another Mind Reader. By now, Kyogre is fully set up and knows Mind Reader, while Politoed still needs Sheer Cold.

If either sub has fallen, they would be replaced now. If not, Kyogre and Politoed use Mind Reader on an enemy, then Kyogre uses Sheer Cold on who it used Mind Reader on. Now Politoed uses Mimic to learn Kyogre's Sheer Cold.

And now we enter the final part of the battle. Kyogre and Politoed both keep up their Subs and do Mind Reader+Sheer Cold combos. If Politoed needs health or there's an enemy weak to Water, Kyogre will use Surf.
Also, if I predict an enemy will use Protect, I will Mind Reader it with Politoed, then use Surf/Sub/Mind Reader, so I waste his Protect without wasting my Sheer Cold.




Please, comment, rate, subscribe.
I mean comment and rate.
If you need any clarifying, feel free to ask.
Any suggestions are welcome, too.
Also, the reason I'm using these sprites is because I like them better.
 
Protect is a common move in doubles, which may give you problems as it stops the Mind Reader/Sheer Cold combo cold.

Secondly, you seem to only have electric and water moves, meaning anything that resists both types, such as grass or dragon-types will give you problems. Grass/Poison, such as Venusaur or Roserade, resists all your attacks and is immune to Toxic, leaving you with no way to deal heavy damage to it. Combine that with a very large grass weakness and you have a problem.

Lastly, is this an item clause team? I ask because, well, leftovers would seem to work better on a lot of your pokemon.
 
I have edited my team in this colour. I still don't know what to do with Vaporeon's final move...

Any help would be appreciated.

Remember, double battles only.(Also, please keep in mind that I suck at explaining things.)
 
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