As Luna's tour banned now enters my summer vacation training arc, I shall participate in the way I know best! Rolling a dice for every ORAS matchup based on who will miss the important precipice blades! Rules for predicts are as follows, if i think your gonna lose, odds are it's for a stupid reason and don't take it seriously, if you get mad at predicts just know it's funnier for The Narrative if you lose. (Will also not be covering drizzlers matchups as my allegiance has not swayed) I will skip matchups if i dont know the players well enough to make jokes for.
SV Ubers: Shuwri vs Mashing Shuwri is a great player, but truthfully i haven't seen him play much. Mashing is a funny person, and the funny person tax dictates that they will not win this game.
SV Ubers: zuzhouwawa vs Kate As impossible as it sounds, kate is probably top 2 in the pool, alongside entrocefreezevictim (i will be making these jokes all season) and i have zero idea who zuz is, but kate would be favored even if i did, consistently on the top of this miserable tier
SS Ubers: Icemaster vs lotiasite Icemaster betrayed me in my time of need and decided that Getting His Jokes Off took the highest priority, and thus his downfall will be prayed for, and it'll feel delectable
USUM Ubers: Rhmsitb vs Tenebricite Tene has been an amazing player everytime i've teamed with him for SM OU / played him in SM OU, and I think his proficiencies in SM will carry over, meanwhile rhmn has been a mainstay, but every paste i have from rhmn has been concocted with marijuana in the system, and idt that'll work on tene. We talking z-hydro cannon arc waters like its dire out here
ORAS Ubers: keys vs Lasen Here we have 2 players known for losing games, and lasen's consistent bad luck in UPL will unfortunately continue, even if bolding keys goes against my religion
BW Ubers: Evuelf vs Hack While bolding against hack is blasphemous, everytime i've teamed with evuelf they have done nothing but succeed without the interference of critical hits, and thus my bias will get him bolded.
DPP Ubers: susciety vs robjr Jumpluff is not good as much as i wish it was, getting me lead 6-0d by aber darkrai was so foul i hope u lose
ADV Ubers: Heysup vs temp (they already played but i'd always pick heysup regardless so im giving myself a point for this)
GSC Ubers: Enigami vs BigFatMantis BFM invests a ton of effort in the most random tiers, and it pays dividends as he's always a consistent get whenever he signs up for something, and tbh i barely know anything about enigami besides that he's good, so i'll be following my bias once more
RBY Ubers: YBW vs Unowndragon You will not catch me predicting RBY because that tier is about as skill-based as landing facefirst after falling off a skateboard, replace it for SV4 IMO TBH
Multigen Bo3: baconeatinassassin vs pdt I think i remember bacon beating the dogshit out of one of my teammates in AGPL, and thus he gets bolded. (mighta been loti who did that idr all ik is my reimu custom is gas)
Manly Melmetals (1) vs (1) Devastating Dialgas
SV Ubers: 7u9i2 vs Yellow Armchair I can make alot of quality puns with the name yellow armchair, just as you can make jokes about luna's tour banned now, so as fellow meme name havers i shalt gift you a bolded name
SV Ubers: fade vs RichardMillePlain (they already played but i'd have bolded richard, i guess you could said say richard caught the... fade = DDDD)
SV Ubers: emoxu9 vs LouisIX Not a clue in hell who emoxu is, but louisix is very good at this tier iirc and i'll bold him.
SS Ubers: Beraldo vs QWILY While beraldo is among my better friends on this site, QWILY is more well versed in the arts of Miraidon Terrorism, and is more than willing to commit felonies to get wins, and i expect that here.
USUM Ubers: Gondra vs Master Chief Gondra does not lose, gondra does not fall.
ORAS Ubers: skimmythegod vs freezai Youtuber Tax
BW Ubers: The Dovahneer vs Monai Dovah will win
DPP Ubers: Piyu vs shrang Shrang put in all star numbers last UPL out of nowhere, people seem to somehow still sleep on this grandpa for his terrible tiering takes but he's very good at DPP, and i will always value mainer knowledge or general pilot skill, even as good as piyush is.
ADV Ubers: 64 Squares vs MMII I trust squares that man is extremely consistent even in a luck tier like ADV.
RBY Ubers: NotVeryCake vs King Billu trash tier nobody wins in RBY
Multigen Bo3: lax vs entrocefalo If you think im bolding entro a single time you gonn be wrong because the jokes will write themselves here, token handouts into losing anyway is nasty work im prayin for u big dog
Choice Bandits (0) vs (0) Void Villains
SV Ubers: Frito vs SoulWind Soulwind is just plain out better.
SV Ubers: Nyx vs JJ09LIE Predictions tax, i don't gotta worry about that though because im tourbanned.... man this summer vacation boutta be CRISP
SV Ubers: Lana vs tier Tier will win this.
SS Ubers: Aberforth vs Fc This is the highlight mu for the week by a mile, one is probably the guy i've teamed with more than anybody else on the site, and the other is Australian. Both fantastic players but FC has midas's touch, as in whatever he touches won't get to move the next turn because he's so lucky n bad. And as i've painfully learned, even when you win, you lose. So i'm bolding aber.
USUM Ubers: The Strap vs Paycard Even if strapper Got His Jokes Off, he's still the better player.
BW Ubers: Kebabe vs 3d 3deez nuts, you think im giving a serious nom in BW?
DPP Ubers: Dave vs London Beats Dave is straight up one of the best ppl on the site, and i'll prolly never bold against him, he got more rings than a jeweler and all he knows is victory, triumph and giving me my tb = I
ADV Ubers: Vileman vs Mako i got to go prep for my grandma's birthday celebration so im speeding this up, just like how VILEMAN will slow his opponent down with 3 thunder paras
GSC Ubers: Rubyblood vs spell Good Snooze Chat is a boring tier, miss me with serious noms in this unless amaranth steps in, and i won't be bolding conflict since im not touchin drizzlers noms.
RBY Ubers: Ctown6 vs Torchic Nobody wins in the RBY slot
Multigen Bo3: Trade vs Gtcha Trade is my guy, im picking trade.