Hello user: Lex.
May I inquire as to the success of this team? Be honest comrade! I ask this not to promote some delusion of grandeur many players seem to boast (frankly the Rate My Team section seems to me to be often Show Off My Team to the General Public of Smogon so Everyone Knows I Ranked a Certain Rank section!) but to more accurately assess your team.
But now, with the good knowledge you put forth in this RMT I will do my best to give advice on rating your team.
Your team seems to me to be primarily defensive in nature despite your defensive core being a Pokemon shorter than your bulky attackers. I know this because your defenders have as much fire power as water (not much, ha ha!) while your attackers focus the majority of their EVs on their defenses. You may not want to admit it but you are running a stall team comrade, a style dating back to the early twenty-first century. Unfortunately this play style is more than just using Wish a lot with a cleric and hoping you don't die while spitting out the occasional offensive move. Yes stall is using Wish a lot with a cleric and hoping you don't die while spitting out the occasional offensive move
while abusing hazards. Ha ha comrade, you will notice the last three words of the previous sentence are bolded to highlight importance! That is the first problem I notice with your team, the lack of hazards which will give you a large source of damage.
Fancier, wiser, more well known, essentially more obnoxious people may often give long complicated advice on how to properly defend while attacking with things like pivoting and gathering momentum and spike stacking and on and on. I think it is time we come down to reality and try and remember the basics, reduce your opponents health to zero percent, six times, and say good game. Ha ha, Pokemon as Arceus intended it! The way stall teams do this is by using lots of hazard which are, as I am sure you know, Stealth Rock, Spikes, and Toxic Spikes.
Stealth Rocks, which you so adeptly use, helps you check many threats including but not limited to Zapdos, Victini, Darmanitan, and notably Yanmega. You have no true counter to Zapdos nor Yanmega which can out stall and destroy your primary special defender Umbreon respectively. Stealth Rocks if by chance you get to set it up in early game can net you hundreds of percent of damage against opposing teams, especially those of defensive nature in a single turn of set up. There is no such thing as a good UU team without Stealth Rocks, I just wanted to make a brief note here about its importance which you seem to recognize.
Spikes is the next most important hazard, which does not seem to have a place anywhere on your team. Spikes as you know can be layered but as you may not know is most useful on its first layer. It gives you a nice 12.5% damage per grounded entry as opposed to the second and third which give 16.7% and 25% respectively. Not even Bulbapedia says the damage changed from generations four to five from 18.75% to 16.7%, only good old Smogon knows, ha ha ha! This means on your second layer you add only a pathetic 4.2% (that is rounded up comrades!) of damage which will rarely be game changing. The final layer if you get a chance to layer it will add a better 8.3% so you should really only use Spikes a second time if you plan to use it a third time or if you have free time which will only happen if you face someone of the likes of me (ha ha I kid comrade)! Since Spikes does as much damage as Stealth Rock to many foes in UU, and more to troubling attackers such as Rhyperior and Cobalion I suggest you to run it along with Stealth Rock to rack up the damage.
Users of Spikes include but are not limited to: Roserade, Froslass, Ferroseed, Qwilfish and Crustle. These are the ones that can reliably set up multiple times which you will need to do since your spinblocker cannot defeat Blastoise or Foresight Hitmontop. Roserade adds a bit of staying power with good resistances. Froslass is a speedy Spiker that can spinblock decently. Crustle is ok and can scare off Xatu like Froslass and has Sturdy which is pretty nice. Ferroseed is bad. I advise though Qwilfish over Crobat though with this standard set.
Qwilfish@Leftovers (Intimidate)
Impish: 252 HP, 252 Defense, 4 SpD
~Spikes
~Haze
~Waterfall
~Taunt/Pain Split
I advise this because it serves as a great Fighting counter and can actually beat, reliably, Mienshao, Scrafty, Machamp and Cobalion, something the others cannot do, not even Gligar can do ha ha! Pain Split is now legal with Intimidate which is nice but Taunt stops Scrafty and Cobalion from setting up on you; Haze only prolongs your life because Waterfall will not do enough to either of them. Qwilfish works well with your team abusing double Intimidate making it difficult for attackers that only get one boost in Attack to overwhelm you. Alomomola helps take pressure off Qwilfish as they counter similar things. Qwilfish takes away Toxic Spikes on entry which would cripple much of your team even with Cleric support.
Speaking of Toxic Spikes, I think we should have a little talk about it. Don't use it, it is not good.
Ha ha, do you see what I did there comrade? A short talk indeed, Toxic Spikes is just not good though because too many grounded Poisons and you already have Toxic on Alomomola. I also suggest you to use Toxic over Earthquake on Hitmontop to cripple anything not immune to it as defensive teams by nature can abuse the increasing Poison damage.
Koga said:
"Sealed within that TM lies Toxic! It is a secret technique dating back some four hundred years."
"When afflicted by Toxic, a Pokémon suffers more and more. It suffers worsening damage as the battle wears on! It will surely terrorize foes!"
Ha ha, if Koga of the Elite Four says it then surely it must be true! As you terrorize your foes you can hide behind the great defenses of your Pokemon due to their efficient EV spreads! Or you could if you had efficient EV spreads! Which brings us to a second problem I see, your EV spreads.
Much like spreads you spread on breads, EV spreads must reach an optimal balance of tasteful power and defense. That balance would be 0% power and 100% defense as you are a stall team. I used Alomomola myself in the good old days and I highly recommend you to use a spread of 4HP, 252 SpD, and 252 Def with an Impish nature. It gives you enough defenses to counter even Banded Flygon still along with now much more easily tanking a hit from Chandelure and friend. I highly recommend you to max out HP and Defense on Hitmontop with an Impish nature so you can better stand up to assaults from the likes of Rhyperior. I rarely use Zapdos or Golurk so I feel less than confident in telling you to change their EVs but I feel that Zapdos' offensive investment is not worth it although Golurk's probably is. I ask you to make your team more defensive EV wise because your main damage won't come from your attacking turns which your EVs affect but your hazard damage which your EVs do not affect.
I apologize for the length of my post, but I think everything I wrote is pretty good stuff to think about for your team if you want to change it up.
