[Jumpman16**]

That's a neat idea, atsync, Sturdy is broken in the Subway and for an offensive team Sawk is the best abuser with its 85 base speed. You'll almost certainly want Scizor on your team, as I've found that it is the single best pokemon in the Subway. Allow me to elaborate (your post was sure a good cue for the post I've been sitting on for a while).

I'm on spring break and I hate reading this thread and "not being able to" comment on the awesome ideas I read here just because I'm (still) behind in reading this thread. I see that Peterko posted I was at 324 about seven weeks ago. (And no, I won't tell you where I am now!) Since I find my Whimsicott team boring or at least very slow (average of 22 minutes per set if I'm paying attention), you can bet there's no way I used that team from battle one after I let myself be bored to death with my streak. So what did I do? I looked long and hard for my "Gen V Startarchomp" so I could bear the first few dozen/hundred battles, and also give myself an excuse to get back to the drawing board.

Startarchomp was my best speed (goodstuffs) team from Gen IV. The name is a portmanteau of its members' names: EB SPIT (Surf/Psy/TB/IB) Starmie (Modest, back when we could get away with it), Lum DD Jolly 252 Atk/Spe Crunch/RS/EQ Tyra, and Scarfchomp with 201 speed equipped with Choice Scarf, max attack and the rest in HP. Everything on that team, at least in DP (Plat changes made it a little worse iirc), made it fast enough to run over almost every combination the AI could throw at me and synergistic enough to weather the steady storm of every attacking type and almost every occurrence of hax that is bound to bother any goodstuffs team. Now I've already gushed about my Gen V goodstuffs team (Specs Latios/CM Cune/Wide Lens SD Terrakion), a deserved gushing after it went a good 200 battles without losing once straight from my beloved drawing board). But trying to revisit that success uncovered a rather glaring chink in the team's armor: the speed crew. I refer to the speed crew as Gengar, Froslass, Espeon, Starmie, and to some extent, the Lati twins. All these pokemon are at least 110 speed and absolutely piss on Terrakion, a pokemon that would otherwise be a top-five Subway poke. But the threat of a TB paralysis/CH on Suicune and the notion of losing a speed tie with Latios against pokemon it may not even be able to KO (I vacillated between 4-attack LO and Specs with Trick)revealed the team to be less stunning than I originally thought, given that they could all severely dent or flat-out OHKO Terrakion without even trying if it weren't Subbed.

So I got so tired of another loss to Gengar Shadow Ball hax that I asked myself: where is my Gen V Startarchomp? I knew what my problem pokes were: the six I mentioned were the only pokemon in a good 1,000 battles that posed any significant threat to my team when i executed properly. So annoyed was I with this speed crew that I decided that I wanted one, just one pokemon that could piss on all of them. While Tyranitar can indeed threaten that, better than almost every pokemon, Tyranitar frankly sucks in the Subway on a goodstuffs team given how many Sturdy pokemon there are, and to put it simply, "Ferrothorn". Yes, Fire Punch can be used to remedy this, but patching six weaknesses isn't cool at all as Terrakion barely was covered by Latios and Suicune as far as synergy is concerned in the first place and it has almost 50 Base Points in Speed on Tyra. So I decided that which ever pokemon I settled on couldn't be something that needed its teammates to cover its ass badly. I decided on Scizor, as alluded to above. But that's not the best part.

Peterko, I've thoroughly enjoyed reading your Terracott team and your Cloyster team, especially because of your logs that actually give us a sense of how dominating a great team is in practice unless logs or battle videos are furnished. Reading how Cloyster shat on so many teams singlehandedly absolutely made my day, given how I have detailed my penchant for finding fast goodstuffs teams that are reliable. When you said about Cloyster that "the amount of sweeps it gets by itself is unreal", I was impressed, but I believe that I've found something that does so even more reliably byself (and it's not Scizor). Here is the team I've used on my current streak:

Haxorus (M) @ Lum Berry ** Battle Hax
Ability: Mold Breaker
EVs: 116HP/252Atk/142Spe
Nature: Adamant
~ Outrage
~ Earthquake
~ Substitute
~ Dragon Dance

Haxorus is able to DD on almost anything and sweep teams with Outrage. +1 Adamant Outrage from 147 Base Attack is pornographic, and 201 speed after DD is why this wins out over CB Moxie Salamence. Lum is perfect for it because it allow it to actual be able to Outrage everything without worry about confusion, or allow Haxorus one grace turn on a mispredicted status move it didn't shield itself from. Sub allows it to exploit the AI's most foolish flaw of spamming status moves when they "don't work", and the 15 extra HP that my EVs grant it allow it to survive a few Ice Beams and Blizzard it otherwise would not. Mold Breaker is a gigantic fuck you to Sturdy, which is so welcome given how broken Sturdy is as I've said. Pure Dragon is a real treat, as it really does not care about anything that isn't a STAB Ice or Dragon move. Which is where the other two members of my team shine, especially Scizor.

Scizor (M) @ Leftovers ** Red X Dawg
Ability: Technician
EVs: 244HP/252Atk/8Spe
Nature: Adamant
~ Bullet Punch
~ Bug Bite
~ Swords Dance
~ Roost

There's almost nothing this thing can't do. It can set up on almost anything, Roost carefully, and most importantly, hard counter the speed crew. Maybe it's more important that it can revenge anything that has a Sash or somehow got by Haxorus with very low HP—Bullet Punch is perhaps the most valuable move on the whole team. It doesn't really care about Par or Burn if it has to take them because of Bullet Punch and Swords Dance respectively. Max HP because it doesn't need speed, and thankfully my third doesn't need Leftovers because they're super handy.

Starmie @ Life Orb ** Shooting *
Ability: Natural Cure
EVs: 4HP/252SpA/252Spd
Nature: Timid
~ Surf
~ Psyshock
~ Ice Beam
~ Thunderbolt

Ever the stopgap, Starmie fills this team out so well. The speed is necessary even with Bullet Punch Scizor, as things like Lead Garchomp4 would always sweep me after I have to break Chomp's sash with Bullet Punch on turn 2 as it SDes again (and why would it ever use Dragon Claw on Haxorus turn 1?). Life Orb is slightly better than EB for things like Magnezone and Swampert that I really want to hit hard and can't for SE damage, and, of course, Life Orb recoil can't cause a loss in Gen V so it's not too bad.

Try this team out if you're looking for quick wins. If someone put a gun to my head, I guess I'd name it "Haxzormie." I've timed myself and I did a set of seven on 8:47 once, which is just sexy as hell. I couldn't let one more day go by without posting this team, even if I have a billion other things to comment on as well...