I believe -Kid posts here on smogon. Anyways, I know him from another message board. I was busy giving my Infernape viagra, waiting for him to bang my slutty Ditto while hatching eggs and throwing away the weaklings, when the call for a battle raged within my soul. This would explain why my team is still only half-IV trained...everytime I start, I get bored and battle someone. And -Kid answered the call.
My team:
His team:
If Leftovers/Stealth Rock make a difference, I'll note it. Otherwise, I'm not going to mark it every single turn.
Nub sent out Regice!
-Kid sent out Uxie!
In the real world, a popsicle vs a Tinkerbell wannabe battle would go nowhere fast. Ironically, this applies to the world of Pokemon too. I figured he'd switch now or soon, so I decided to Poison him.
Regice used Toxic! Uxie was badly poisoned.
-Kid's Uxie used Yawn!
At this point, Regice started to look like this::doom:
Regice used Ice Beam! (20% damage)
Uxie used Reflect!
Reflect could pose a problem. I send out Scizor to Brick Break that crap away.
Nub withdrew Regice. Nub sent out Scizor!
-Kid withdrew Uxie. -Kid sent out Heatran!
Dang. I wish I would have gotten to Brick Break, THEN have him switch to Heatran. Ah well. After contemplating on WTF Heatran is(I'm leaning towards a volcanic frog or the fecal aftermath of too much Taco Bell), I switched out to my Swamp thing.
Nub withdrew Scizor. Nub sent out Swampert!
Heatran used Lava Plume(25% damage). Swampert was burned!
Burned, like Paris Hilton at the MTV movie awards. Swampert is basically damage fodder at this point, so I figure I may as well Stealth Rock him.
Swampert used Stealth Rock!
-Kid withdrew Heatran. -Kid sent out Dragonite!
Normally I'd love this, but Avalanche with a burn is like throwing a snowball at the school bully. Doesn't do a whole lot. I expect a Dragon Dance at this point, so I sent out Donphan.
Nub withdrew Swampert. Nub sent out Donphan!
Dragonite used Earthquake!(20% damage). Dragonite was hurt by Life Orb.
Didn't see that coming. Oh well. Even Ray Charles saw Ice Shard coming, but I made a mistake in not predicting his prediction, how predictable.
-Kid withdrew Dragonite. -Kid sent out Scizor!
Donphan used Ice Shard. A critical hit! (15% damage)
WOOOOOOO
Nub withdrew Donphan. Nub sent out Infernape!
Scizor used Agility!
Crap. I was expecting an X-Scissor. The question is, will his ninja go kamikaze and hit me hard, or play it safe?
-Kid withdrew Scizor. -Kid sent out Dragonite!
Infernape used Fire Blast! It's not very effective...(35% damage)
He'll regret not spanking the monkey while he had the chance later. After Dragonite getting hit by Stealth Rock and the Fire Blast, I might have been able to kill him here. But I didn't want to take the risk.
Nub withdrew Infernape. Nub sent out Donphan!
Dragonite used Earthquake! (20% damage)
At least this time, the EQ made sense. Because Dragonite had taken some damage, I figured he might have left him in to die from Stealth Rock, so I used Ice Shard again.
-Kid withdrew Dragonite. -Kid sent out Scizor!
Donphan used Ice Shard!
Okay...I figured Donphan can take one hit at least, so I'll leave him in for a turn.
Scizor used Iron Head! (30% damage)
Donphan used Earthquake! (30% damage)
It's a stalemate, but my height-challenged elephant already took some damage. I decided to save Donphan anduse my own Scizor.
Nub withdrew Donphan. Nub sent out Scizor!
Scizor used Iron Head! It's not very effective...(20% damage)
-Kid's Scizor used Iron Head! It's not very effective...(20% damage)
Nub's Scizor used Brick Break! (45% damage) -Kid's Scizor fainted!
6-5 Nub
Wow, I figured with a 31 Speed IV and 252 Speed EVs, I'd outspeed him. Must have been Jolly. Ah well.
-Kid sent out Starmie!
I'll need Scizor later. Time to send out Regice.
Nub withdrew Scizor. Nub sent out Regice!
Starmie used Surf! (30% damage)
That did a little more than expected. Oh well.
-Kid withdrew Starmie. -Kid sent out Machamp!
Regice is fast asleep.
Crap. I have no counter for Machamp. I wish I had brought Metagross along today. Time to make a sacrifice.
Nub withdrew Regice. Nub sent out Swampert!
Machamp used Dynamicpunchwithnospaces! (70% damage). Swampert became Confused!
Swampert is confused! It killed itself in its confusion!
Machamp used Stone Edge against the air, oh noes!
5-5
Bye, Swampsies.
Nub sent out Scizor!
What do Chris Benoit and Machamp have in common? They both love steroids, and they're both really slow.
Scizor used Iron Head!(75% damage)
Machamp used Dynamicpunch! A critical hit! Scizor fainted.
5-4 -Kid
Well, Scizor did his job. Forcing the switch, this would end up making a big difference as Stealth Rock continued to wear him down.
Nub sent out Weavile!
-Kid withdrew Machamp! -Kid sent out Uxie!
Weavile used Ice Punch! (40% damage)
Uxie is like a fat whore. She doesn't go down in one shot from her pimp like Azelf, but she's still Weavile's plaything.
Weavile used Ice Punch! (25% damage). Uxie fainted!
4-4
Weavile backhands. Strong enough for a man, but made for an Uxie.
-Kid sent out Dragonite!
Hmm...Choice Scarf, much? I wasn't going to take the chance, that's for sure.
Nub sent out Donphan!
Dragonite used Outrage! (35% damage)
After a couple Life Orbs, Stealth Rock switch-ins, and Infernape's Fire Blast, the poor dragon was stuck like Michael Moore's intestines after the grand opening of a new Hardees restaurant. If it switched, Stealth Rock would own it later. GG Nite.
Donphan used Ice Shard. It's super effective! Dragonite fainted!
4-3 Nub
-Kid sent out Starmie!
After seeing how much Starmie did to Regice last time, I decided to let my elephant drown in his watering hole. Don't tell PETA.
Starmie used Surf! Donphan fainted!
3-3
Nub sent out Regice!
I know what's coming. Machamp. Time to wake up and blow up.
-Kid withdrew Starmie. -Kid sent out Machamp!
Regice is fast asleep
You're late for work, Regice.
Machamp used Rest!
Regice is fast asleep.
Wonderful, although I saw it coming. Now I HAVE to use Explosion.
Machamp used Sleep Talk! Machamp used Stone Edge!(70% damage)
Regice is fast asleep.
FOUR EFFING TURNS. Regice is having quite the hangover.
Machamp used Sleep Talk! Machamp used Dynamicpunch! It's super effective! Regice fainted
3-2 -Kid
A sketch artist's rendition of my face at the time:
Well, that screwed up my plans, big time. All I had to do was wake up and I was good to go, but now it's going to take a miracle.
Nub sent out Infernape!
-Kid withdrew Machamp. -Kid sent out Heatran!
Infernape used Fire Blast! Heatran's Flash Fire boosted its Fire attacks!
I figured he would do this, but I had to risk it. Either that or have Machamp wake up and Dynamicpunch me. But I have a trick up my sleeve...
Infernape used Focus Blast! It's super effective!(100% damage) Heatran fainted! Infernape is hurt by Life Orb!
2-2
Yeah I know, Focus Blast is a noobish move. But no one sees it coming, and thus it catches people off guard, as it did here. Still, I was screwed.
-Kid sent out Starmie! Starmie is hurt by Stealth Rock!
I'd love to Grass Knot here, too bad I'm outsped if I try. Take note of Stealth Rock though.
Starmie used Surf! It's super effective!(90% damage) Infernape fainted!
2-1 -Kid
Well, that's basically game. I have Weavile left...normally, I'd simply Night Slash it, except for one small problem...a full health Machamp waiting for me. I needed a miracle.
Starmie used Surf!(99% damage)
Weavile used Ice Punch! It's not very effective(45% damage). Starmie was frozen solid!
THANK YOU JESUS ON 7/7/07! My miracle came true. Well, one of them.
Starmie is frozen solid!
Weavile used Ice Punch! It's not very effective...(43% damage). Starmie fainted!
1-1
Out of the fire, and into the furnace. Sure, I got lucky. But I still have a Machamp coming who's about to wake up. I need another miracle.
-Kid sent out Machamp! Machamp was hurt by Stealth Rock!
Swampert strikes back from the grave once again. Here we go...
Weavile used Ice Punch!(48% damage)
Machamp woke up! Machamp used Sleep Talk! But it failed!
A sketch artist's rendition of my face after THIS::happybrain:
Weavile used Ice Punch!(48% damage). Machamp fainted!
1-0, Nub wins!
I'm still shocked that he forgot he'd be waking up. He told me he forgot after getting pissed about Starmie. However it happened, I'll take it!
Props:
-Kid for an insane battle.
Scizor for forcing the switch on Machamp, buying me time
Stealth Rock for giving me just enough damage to pull it off
Weavile for freeze hax, and Jesus for 2 miracles
Slops:
Me, for a few noobish mistakes here and there, thus having to depend on luck to bail me out.
Me, for being lazy and only breeding for good IVs on 3 Pokes
Regice for pulling a Terri Schaivo and never waking up
Me, for writing what is probably a pretty crappy first warstory
My team:
His team:
If Leftovers/Stealth Rock make a difference, I'll note it. Otherwise, I'm not going to mark it every single turn.
Nub sent out Regice!
-Kid sent out Uxie!
In the real world, a popsicle vs a Tinkerbell wannabe battle would go nowhere fast. Ironically, this applies to the world of Pokemon too. I figured he'd switch now or soon, so I decided to Poison him.
Regice used Toxic! Uxie was badly poisoned.
-Kid's Uxie used Yawn!
At this point, Regice started to look like this::doom:
Regice used Ice Beam! (20% damage)
Uxie used Reflect!
Reflect could pose a problem. I send out Scizor to Brick Break that crap away.
Nub withdrew Regice. Nub sent out Scizor!
-Kid withdrew Uxie. -Kid sent out Heatran!
Dang. I wish I would have gotten to Brick Break, THEN have him switch to Heatran. Ah well. After contemplating on WTF Heatran is(I'm leaning towards a volcanic frog or the fecal aftermath of too much Taco Bell), I switched out to my Swamp thing.
Nub withdrew Scizor. Nub sent out Swampert!
Heatran used Lava Plume(25% damage). Swampert was burned!
Burned, like Paris Hilton at the MTV movie awards. Swampert is basically damage fodder at this point, so I figure I may as well Stealth Rock him.
Swampert used Stealth Rock!
-Kid withdrew Heatran. -Kid sent out Dragonite!
Normally I'd love this, but Avalanche with a burn is like throwing a snowball at the school bully. Doesn't do a whole lot. I expect a Dragon Dance at this point, so I sent out Donphan.
Nub withdrew Swampert. Nub sent out Donphan!
Dragonite used Earthquake!(20% damage). Dragonite was hurt by Life Orb.
Didn't see that coming. Oh well. Even Ray Charles saw Ice Shard coming, but I made a mistake in not predicting his prediction, how predictable.
-Kid withdrew Dragonite. -Kid sent out Scizor!
Donphan used Ice Shard. A critical hit! (15% damage)
WOOOOOOO
Nub withdrew Donphan. Nub sent out Infernape!
Scizor used Agility!
Crap. I was expecting an X-Scissor. The question is, will his ninja go kamikaze and hit me hard, or play it safe?
-Kid withdrew Scizor. -Kid sent out Dragonite!
Infernape used Fire Blast! It's not very effective...(35% damage)
He'll regret not spanking the monkey while he had the chance later. After Dragonite getting hit by Stealth Rock and the Fire Blast, I might have been able to kill him here. But I didn't want to take the risk.
Nub withdrew Infernape. Nub sent out Donphan!
Dragonite used Earthquake! (20% damage)
At least this time, the EQ made sense. Because Dragonite had taken some damage, I figured he might have left him in to die from Stealth Rock, so I used Ice Shard again.
-Kid withdrew Dragonite. -Kid sent out Scizor!
Donphan used Ice Shard!
Okay...I figured Donphan can take one hit at least, so I'll leave him in for a turn.
Scizor used Iron Head! (30% damage)
Donphan used Earthquake! (30% damage)
It's a stalemate, but my height-challenged elephant already took some damage. I decided to save Donphan anduse my own Scizor.
Nub withdrew Donphan. Nub sent out Scizor!
Scizor used Iron Head! It's not very effective...(20% damage)
-Kid's Scizor used Iron Head! It's not very effective...(20% damage)
Nub's Scizor used Brick Break! (45% damage) -Kid's Scizor fainted!
6-5 Nub
Wow, I figured with a 31 Speed IV and 252 Speed EVs, I'd outspeed him. Must have been Jolly. Ah well.
-Kid sent out Starmie!
I'll need Scizor later. Time to send out Regice.
Nub withdrew Scizor. Nub sent out Regice!
Starmie used Surf! (30% damage)
That did a little more than expected. Oh well.
-Kid withdrew Starmie. -Kid sent out Machamp!
Regice is fast asleep.
Crap. I have no counter for Machamp. I wish I had brought Metagross along today. Time to make a sacrifice.
Nub withdrew Regice. Nub sent out Swampert!
Machamp used Dynamicpunchwithnospaces! (70% damage). Swampert became Confused!
Swampert is confused! It killed itself in its confusion!
Machamp used Stone Edge against the air, oh noes!
5-5
Bye, Swampsies.
Nub sent out Scizor!
What do Chris Benoit and Machamp have in common? They both love steroids, and they're both really slow.
Scizor used Iron Head!(75% damage)
Machamp used Dynamicpunch! A critical hit! Scizor fainted.
5-4 -Kid
Well, Scizor did his job. Forcing the switch, this would end up making a big difference as Stealth Rock continued to wear him down.
Nub sent out Weavile!
-Kid withdrew Machamp! -Kid sent out Uxie!
Weavile used Ice Punch! (40% damage)
Uxie is like a fat whore. She doesn't go down in one shot from her pimp like Azelf, but she's still Weavile's plaything.
Weavile used Ice Punch! (25% damage). Uxie fainted!
4-4
Weavile backhands. Strong enough for a man, but made for an Uxie.
-Kid sent out Dragonite!
Hmm...Choice Scarf, much? I wasn't going to take the chance, that's for sure.
Nub sent out Donphan!
Dragonite used Outrage! (35% damage)
After a couple Life Orbs, Stealth Rock switch-ins, and Infernape's Fire Blast, the poor dragon was stuck like Michael Moore's intestines after the grand opening of a new Hardees restaurant. If it switched, Stealth Rock would own it later. GG Nite.
Donphan used Ice Shard. It's super effective! Dragonite fainted!
4-3 Nub
-Kid sent out Starmie!
After seeing how much Starmie did to Regice last time, I decided to let my elephant drown in his watering hole. Don't tell PETA.
Starmie used Surf! Donphan fainted!
3-3
Nub sent out Regice!
I know what's coming. Machamp. Time to wake up and blow up.
-Kid withdrew Starmie. -Kid sent out Machamp!
Regice is fast asleep
You're late for work, Regice.
Machamp used Rest!
Regice is fast asleep.
Wonderful, although I saw it coming. Now I HAVE to use Explosion.
Machamp used Sleep Talk! Machamp used Stone Edge!(70% damage)
Regice is fast asleep.
FOUR EFFING TURNS. Regice is having quite the hangover.
Machamp used Sleep Talk! Machamp used Dynamicpunch! It's super effective! Regice fainted
3-2 -Kid
A sketch artist's rendition of my face at the time:
Well, that screwed up my plans, big time. All I had to do was wake up and I was good to go, but now it's going to take a miracle.
Nub sent out Infernape!
-Kid withdrew Machamp. -Kid sent out Heatran!
Infernape used Fire Blast! Heatran's Flash Fire boosted its Fire attacks!
I figured he would do this, but I had to risk it. Either that or have Machamp wake up and Dynamicpunch me. But I have a trick up my sleeve...
Infernape used Focus Blast! It's super effective!(100% damage) Heatran fainted! Infernape is hurt by Life Orb!
2-2
Yeah I know, Focus Blast is a noobish move. But no one sees it coming, and thus it catches people off guard, as it did here. Still, I was screwed.
-Kid sent out Starmie! Starmie is hurt by Stealth Rock!
I'd love to Grass Knot here, too bad I'm outsped if I try. Take note of Stealth Rock though.
Starmie used Surf! It's super effective!(90% damage) Infernape fainted!
2-1 -Kid
Well, that's basically game. I have Weavile left...normally, I'd simply Night Slash it, except for one small problem...a full health Machamp waiting for me. I needed a miracle.
Starmie used Surf!(99% damage)
Weavile used Ice Punch! It's not very effective(45% damage). Starmie was frozen solid!
THANK YOU JESUS ON 7/7/07! My miracle came true. Well, one of them.
Starmie is frozen solid!
Weavile used Ice Punch! It's not very effective...(43% damage). Starmie fainted!
1-1
Out of the fire, and into the furnace. Sure, I got lucky. But I still have a Machamp coming who's about to wake up. I need another miracle.
-Kid sent out Machamp! Machamp was hurt by Stealth Rock!
Swampert strikes back from the grave once again. Here we go...
Weavile used Ice Punch!(48% damage)
Machamp woke up! Machamp used Sleep Talk! But it failed!
A sketch artist's rendition of my face after THIS::happybrain:
Weavile used Ice Punch!(48% damage). Machamp fainted!
1-0, Nub wins!
I'm still shocked that he forgot he'd be waking up. He told me he forgot after getting pissed about Starmie. However it happened, I'll take it!
Props:
-Kid for an insane battle.
Scizor for forcing the switch on Machamp, buying me time
Stealth Rock for giving me just enough damage to pull it off
Weavile for freeze hax, and Jesus for 2 miracles
Slops:
Me, for a few noobish mistakes here and there, thus having to depend on luck to bail me out.
Me, for being lazy and only breeding for good IVs on 3 Pokes
Regice for pulling a Terri Schaivo and never waking up
Me, for writing what is probably a pretty crappy first warstory
