announcing the competitive pokemon event of the generation

az

toddmoding
is a Community Contributoris an Artist Alumnusis a Community Leader Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
some questions are timeless

what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?

who would win, rocky or marciano?

if god is impotent, how come he can't make a set of three lying doors like in labyrinth or w/e that all lie to him at the same time while he benchpresses them?

for milenniums, scholae have pondered on these quandaries

today, however, i bring you an announcement — it's time to put the greatest question of all time to the best

who would win, az or za?

it's been a long time in the making — it's hard to imagine two users with as storied a history as this..

however, in case youve been living under a rock this entire time (since yesterday when this all began), let's introduce you to the competitors

two users with equally cool short two-letter usernames..

that they would seek one another out to determine who may reign was inevitable

and so, the challenge was issued....

let's meet our first challenger, az....



name: az
weight: 200,000 pounds (sterling)
age: yes
battling strategy: wisdom, patience, pure agrescion, power of will, hunting senses of a spotted warbler




yep, this user sure has been around the block a few times — owing predominantly to their oversized left leg, a byproduct of their Three Hundred Hopsquat routine

twelve thousand years old, its said az invented the pokeball as a child when he was finger-painting with red and white paint, and cupped his hand around a garydos to capture it

since then the ancient user has gone on to reach dizzying heights, with an incomparable battling career, including winning the Invisible Trophy cup, and the Mass Amnesia About It smogon tour..... incredible. he;s yet to be defeated in nearly a decade of battling. waow!!

now, the user reportedly rarely approaches the field of battle, instead playing out millions of strategies a second in his Mind Palace



wow, a true compedidor

and their opponent?



name: za
favourite order of letters a and z: za
age: young buck
3 * 3: 9




a user that couldn't be more opposite.. this young turk has shaken up the scene ever since they came along, conquering the pokemon league decisively.. all from the comfort of their home with their ipod nano. brave new world!

where az boasts Being Alive For A Long Time, za keeps their age lean, all that power condensed into a sleek, aerodynamic lifespan



as a result this competitor is quick on their feet, and theyve even got an avatar in full technicolor. fancy!!

needless to say, it#s sure to be a battle for the ages

they were born in separate millenniums

a clash of titans

a clash of clans, proud sponsor of this once-in-a-lifetime pay-per-view event

it's red versus blue

it's old versus new

it's alpha versus omega

it's butts versus pizza

it's renting but having a rly hot landlady versus owning and having residential security

it's crunchy versus smooth

coke versus pepsi

ess-mod versus smod

and there can be only one..................

on 13/03/21 (03/13/21 if youre nasty) at 23:00 GMT, these questions and more will be answered once and for all...

pokemon may never be the same again
 
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hey az i have a question when were those photos taken? Intuition says its not possible to get that buff but i dont really know, i just started working out so i wanna know how long it took you to get that strong

also can you give me some things i could do to get stronger thnak ye
 

az

toddmoding
is a Community Contributoris an Artist Alumnusis a Community Leader Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnus
JUST THREE DAYS until the greatest battling event of our time

hey az i have a question when were those photos taken? Intuition says its not possible to get that buff but i dont really know, i just started working out so i wanna know how long it took you to get that strong

also can you give me some things i could do to get stronger thnak ye
hi musique, great question

since the mid-ninedies ive actually sworn off physical weights — youre right that the gains above would be impossible just by manual lifting alone

to exceed these limitations i began experimenting with other methods of lifting heavy objects, such as pulleys and forklifts

here's a photo of me in 2004



anw once youre comfortable doing your lifting with machines, then you can get rid of the concept of physical lifting entirely

these days i subsist purely on thinking about lifting very large objects — or sometimes concepts

this morning i thought about playing singleplayer volleyball over the golden gate bridge with the moon

hope this helps
 
JUST THREE DAYS until the greatest battling event of our time



hi musique, great question

since the mid-ninedies ive actually sworn off physical weights — youre right that the gains above would be impossible just by manual lifting alone

to exceed these limitations i began experimenting with other methods of lifting heavy objects, such as pulleys and forklifts

here's a photo of me in 2004



anw once youre comfortable doing your lifting with machines, then you can get rid of the concept of physical lifting entirely

these days i subsist purely on thinking about lifting very large objects — or sometimes concepts

this morning i thought about playing singleplayer volleyball over the golden gate bridge with the moon

hope this helps
Wow you are so hot!!!!!!!!!!

Also thank you for the tips
 
Firstly, I would like to thank you for posting this. I had not seen it sooner as I have been training deep within the jungles of Malaysia in preparation for this clash of titans... however, I am a man of principle and truth. As such, I cannot help but notice your glaring dishonesty.

You claim to be undefeated...

But I just so happen to have found this file encrypted within the archives...

Replays - Pokémon Showdown (pokemonshowdown.com)

Curious.
 
Firstly, I would like to thank you for posting this. I had not seen it sooner as I have been training deep within the jungles of Malaysia in preparation for this clash of titans... however, I am a man of principle and truth. As such, I cannot help but notice your glaring dishonesty.

You claim to be undefeated...

But I just so happen to have found this file encrypted within the archives...

Replays - Pokémon Showdown (pokemonshowdown.com)

Curious.
I think that Ivysaur had Parental Bond.
 

Sijih

game show genius
is a Forum Moderatoris a Community Contributor
Moderator
az's undefeated reign of terror over the pokemon community has lasted for too long...

it appears that only in the shadow dimension of vader can az be beaten - but courageous za doesn't possess enough smod wizardy powers nor do enough illegal substances to access v's alternative reality

but I've found something... in the dark corners of the web... a replay... the only one in existence... it shows something that many may have considered impossible... az losing to someone who wasn't a dark sorcerer, but a mortal man...

(all the other replays of az losing 6-0 are visual glitches trust me zarel should get to fixing that)

it appears that someone who used to have the skill to beat az walks among us... shade. this replay was uploaded on april 1, 2015 - but don't let az claim that he lost as an april fool's joke - he was defeated by shade's elegant battling. floating like a butterfly, stinging like a bee, substituting and leech seeding like a man with nothing to lose. shade had the skill required...

but eons have passed since the times of 2015. shade's reflexes have slowed, his prediction skill has diminished, and his hairline has receded.

so there's only one option... shade and za must team up. with shade's tutoring and za's capabilities, they are the only real hope at beating az. but it won't be easy. this football-loving-greggs-eating englishman and nfl-loving-bone-in-wing-eating american have to be able to put their differences aside. they have to be able to understand each other. they have to refine za's skill to a level of mental and physical preparedness unmatched by any battler before.

can they do it? can the old champion and the young gun team up to acquire victory?

we'll see...
 
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