CAP 29 - Part 12 - Pokedex Submissions

[LowenCraft]

Final Submission

Chomera, the Acrylic Pokémon

Sword: It was a longtime friend of Smeargle after they met in a gallery. It created the first paint for humans to use.

Shield: Rumor has it that Chomera painted the Earth into existence. Chomera's mane reacts to any Pokémon move, changing its type.

 

[Shadowshocker]

Final Submission

Chromera, the Muse Pokémon

Sword: Legends speak of countless artworks that were produced in tribute to this Pokémon, but all of them were rejected by Chromera due to its finicky nature.

Shield: It changes the composition of its cells to alter its color. A bitter feud was fought between artist guilds over the color to portray this Pokémon in.

 

[TheCV]

Final Submission

Chromera, the Benefactor Pokémon

Sword: Chromera has been a longtime influence on human art. It's said that its tail whispered the basics of cave painting into human dreams thousands of years ago.

Shield: An old wives' tale claims that Smeargle worshiped Chromera for years. In return, Chromera provided Smeargle with its paintbrush tail, to Smeargle's delight.

 

[King Of Moths]

Final Submission

Chromera, the Portrait Pokémon

Sword: With its sharp claws and ooze able to change color on contact with clothing, Chromera is favored among museums and art galleries as guards.

Shield: Due to its presence across the art of ancient civilizations, modern conspiracy theories state that there exists secret orders with Chromera as their mascot.

 

[MrDollSteak]

In preparation for the poll tomorrow I've done a legality check on all current final submissions. I'm doing this to be nice and to give everyone a head's up, apologies for the pings.

Ziggizagoon lel
Species name incorrectly capitalised
Sword entry should read 'there have been tales about how Chromera once melted a city'
Shield entry should be in the future tense 'Once angered, Chromera will paint patterns with the acid on its tail, burning through anything it touches.'

Brambane
Sword entry should read 'galar's history' or 'galarian history' not 'galar history' and would then be too long

Gekokeso
Shield entry: CHROMERA should be uncapitalised

NoahIOTJ
Sword entry is too long: 157 characters (with spaces)
Shield entry is too long: 174 characters (with spaces)

Explosion Badger
Shield entry: 'itself' messes with the plurals in the sentence slightly, changing the position could help

Apathetic Inaction
Sword entry is too long: 158 characters (with spaces)
Shield entry: Subject is hard to parse in second sentence - would read better as 'those that are stolen from' but would then go over the length limit

Ayecrusher King
Shield entry is too long: 208 characters (with spaces)

Tommaniacal
Sword entry: Grammar is a bit confusing I would rephrase the first clause to "Many famous artworks are actually fakes!" and go from there to tweak.
Shield entry: Use amongst instead of among

LordThemberchaud
Shield entry is too long: 38 words and 190 characters (with spaces)

StarFalcon555
Shield entry is too long: 178 characters (with spaces)

Bandkrook
Sword entry is too long: 174 (with spaces)
Shield entry is too long: 175 (with spaces)

Bice
- Sword entry: 'in some of the most iconic paintings' is missing a subject - add 'world's' in between 'the' and 'most'
- Shield entry: subverting doesn't seem like the best word to use here grammatically, something like ruining would work better

King Of Moths
- remove s from 'exists' in Shield entry

Ubertrainer2000
- Species name is missing an 'r' in Chromera

LowenCraft
- All references to Chromera are missing an 'r'

 

[idea]

Apathetic Inaction
Sword entry is too long: 158 characters (with spaces)
Shield entry: Subject is hard to parse in second sentence - would read better as 'those that are stolen from' but would then go over the length limit

Thanks for pointing this out. I have edited the entries (removed ‘own’ in sword entry and reworded the second sentence of the shield entry). Is the Shield entry clear enough now?

 

[MrDollSteak]

Thanks for pointing this out. I have edited the entries (removed ‘own’ in sword entry and reworded the second sentence of the shield entry). Is the Shield entry clear enough now?

Definitely clearer! I didnt actually realise that the original intention was to refer to people being stolen from so that's better.

 

[Band]

Final Submission

Chromera, the Masterpiece Pokémon

Sword: The liquid dripping from Chromera's mane is both paint and poison. Only skilled artists can use it and not die in the process from its intoxicating fumes.

Shield: Chromera's real coloration is a mystery. This Pokémon constantly changes its color at will to confuse prey and greedy artists trying to steal its paint.

 

[LordThemberchaud]

I just edited mine, is it okay?

 

[AquaKirb]

Final Submission

Chromera, the Creation Pokemon

Sword: It can create food and water with its tail. However, the tail seems to prefer luring pokemon to the mouth.

Shield: Many artists have tried to steal its paint, famous for being used for the most famous drawings. To CHROMERA, they are just a free meal.

edit: first time submitting something to a CAP, i have no doubt this isn't winning though

 

[Pipotchi]

Final Submission

Chromera, the Creation Pokemon

Sword: It can create food and water with its tail. However, the tail seems to prefer luring pokemon to the mouth.

Shield: Many artists have tried to steal its paint, famous for being used for the most famous drawings. To CHROMERA, they are just a free meal.

edit: first time submitting something to a CAP, i have no doubt this isn't winning though

just heads up, you shouldnt capitalize the mons name like that or itll be disqualified. also make sure you write " Pokémon " on the first and 2nd line so it can go through also

 

[MrDollSteak]

Final Submission

Chromera, the Masterpiece Pokémon

Sword: The liquid dripping from Chromera's mane is both paint and poison. Only skilled artists can use it and not die in the process from its intoxicating fumes.

Shield: Chromera's real coloration is a mystery. This Pokémon constantly changes its color at will to confuse prey and greedy artists trying to steal its paint.

I just edited mine, is it okay?

Both of these are fine now!

Final Submission

Chromera, the Creation Pokemon

Sword: It can create food and water with its tail. However, the tail seems to prefer luring pokemon to the mouth.

Shield: Many artists have tried to steal its paint, famous for being used for the most famous drawings. To CHROMERA, they are just a free meal.

edit: first time submitting something to a CAP, i have no doubt this isn't winning though

As Pip said there are a few issues here in regard to grammar and formatting.

 

[MrDollSteak]

Disqualifications:

• NoahIOTJ: Sword and Shield entries are longer than 156 characters.
• Ziggizagoon lel: Species name incorrectly capitalised, incorrect grammar in Sword entry, incorrect tense agreements in Shield entry.
• Ayecrusher King: Shield entry is longer than 156 characters.
• LowenCraft: Chromera is spelt incorrectly
• Ubertrainer2000: Chromera is spelt incorrectly
• King of Moths: incorrect plural agreements between 'exists' and 'secret societies'
• Aquakirb: incorrect capitalisation, missing accent on Pokémon

Everyone else advances to poll 1!