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Big Chaos Mafia 3 - well memed

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Texas Cloverleaf said:
bg protect all claim
Click to expand...
My duty to you, dear reader, constrains me to the disagreeable and almost painful task of giving you a significant amount of information that you may be unwilling to accept. The key point of the following exposition is that you may find it instructive to contrast the things I like with the things that Councilmember Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, Cloverleaf likes. I like listening to music. Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, likes doing the devil's work. I like kittens and puppies. Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, likes causing this country to flounder on the shoals of self-interest, corruption, and chaos. I like spending time with friends. Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, likes threatening anyone who's bold enough to state that I have a plan to put to rest the animosities that have kept various groups of people from enjoying anything other than superficial unity. I call this plan “Operation get the Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, Cloverleaf monkey off our backs and off other people's backs as well”. (Granted, I need a shorter, catchier name, but that one will do for now.) My plan's underlying motif is that if we don't cast a ray of light on Texas, the dastardly claim stealer,'s alabandical, mudslinging editorials, then Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, will soon become unstoppable. No borders will be able to detain him. No united global opinion will be able to isolate him. No international police or juridical institutions will be able to interdict him.

I aver that Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, will indubitably reduce human beings and many other living organisms to engineered products and mere cogs in the social machine eventually. I base this confident prediction on, among other things, the fact that when all discoverable facts and experience fly in the face of his treasonous world view, he stubbornly holds onto his ignorance as his birthright. But wait—as they say on late-night television infomercials—there's more: If we can understand what has caused the current plague of huffy hell-raisers, I believe that we can then scrap the entire constellation of hideous ideas that brought us to our present point. His recent attempt to sully my reputation may prove to be a watershed event for those of us who want to shout back at his propaganda. It is also worthy of note that by painting people of different races and cultures as litigious alien forces undermining the coherent national will, Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, is telegraphing his intentions to cause one-sided put-downs to be entered into historical fact. He who pays the piper calls the tune. With that in mind, I did a little research to find where he gets his money. It turns out that it comes primarily from venal, insipid dorks, inimical gilly-gaupuses, and—you guessed it—imperialism-oriented wing nuts (especially the overbearing type). This explains why Texas, the dastardly claim stealer,'s association of obscene preachers of sensationalism has its own, lickerish slogan. That slogan is, “Manufacture and compile daunting lists of imaginary transgressions committed against Texas, the dastardly claim stealer,”. What this slogan lacks in wit, it makes up for in its ability to numb the public to the serfism and injustice in mainstream politics.

Woe betide you if you challenge Texas, the dastardly claim stealer,'s goofy claim that 75 million years ago, a galactic tyrant named Xenu solved the overpopulation problem of his 76-planet federation by transporting the excess people to Earth, chaining them to volcanoes, and dropping H-bombs on them. Apparently, that belief is sacred dogma to Texas, the dastardly claim stealer,'s servitors; to question it is sacrilege. You'll be shouted down forever after, even if you're merely attempting to state something innocuous such as that I have no intention to cut and run even if Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, were to do the devil's work. Rather, I will stand my ground and pronounce an enlightened and just judgment upon him. Whether or not I'm successful, you may have noticed that my observations are perhaps unique. But you don't know the half of it. For starters, I like to challenge people to raise lewd, morally repugnant long-haired hippies out of their cultural misery and lead them to the national community as a valuable, united factor. I realize that that's a tall order, but Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, is a psychologically defective person. He's what the psychiatrists call a constitutional psychopath or a sociopath.

Texas, the dastardly claim stealer,'s argument that his perversions are a breath of fresh air amid our modern culture's toxic cloud of chaos is hopelessly flawed and thoroughly circuitous. I have a problem with Texas, the dastardly claim stealer,'s use of the phrase, “We all know that…”. With this phrase, he doesn't need to prove his claim that individual worth is defined by race, ethnicity, religion, or national origin; he merely accepts it as fact. To put it another way, his tender and delicate adjustments and readjustments of his convictions may succeed at convincing a few uppish lunkheads that we have no reason to be fearful about the criminally violent trends in our society today and over the past ten to fifteen years. Nevertheless, I find Texas, the dastardly claim stealer,'s failed attempts to substitute breast-beating and schwarmerei for action and honest debate mildly amusing. End of story. Actually, I should add that he has a natural talent for complaining. He can find any aspect of life and whine about it for hours upon hours.

The key to Texas, the dastardly claim stealer,'s soul is his longing for the effortless, irresponsible, automatic consciousness of an animal. He dreads the necessity, the risk, and the responsibility of rational cognition. As a result, unlike the usual, amateurish, garden-variety voluptuary, Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, can't attack my ideas, so he attacks me. It could be worse, I suppose. He could pilfer the national treasure. Texas, the dastardly claim stealer, gets perfervid about sectarianism. The destruction of the Tower of Babel, be it a literal truth, an allegory, or a mere story based upon cultural archetypes, illustrates this truth plainly. Let me conclude by expressing the hope that by reading this letter you have learned the life lesson, “Always explain a few facets of this confusing world around us.”
 
In summation, all FOOLS must present their claims to me at once. In the absence of such an article being received by me, I will instantaneously target heretics and treasoners with lynches and vigilantes.
 
Walrein - Yesterday at 7:14 PM
i need a hard yes/no from you now btw
finalizing the playerlist as we speak
also note that [REDACTED] is playing
Empoof - Yesterday at 7:22 PM
oh wut
uuuhhhh
lemme look at it
Walrein - Yesterday at 7:23 PM
http://www.smogon.com/forums/threads/chaos-mafia-3-signups.3599749/
Empoof - Yesterday at 7:23 PM
oh it starts now?
i can't
Walrein - Yesterday at 7:23 PM
what if i gave you a role that literally doesn't even have to do anything
Empoof - Yesterday at 7:24 PM
ok
LMAO
only because [REDACTED]
Walrein - Yesterday at 7:24 PM
good shit
Empoof - Yesterday at 8:00 PM
o7

I'm immune to neutrals and am a miller. I have no night action and may or may not have more abilities. School starts for me tomorrow along with the twoplustwo anniversary game... I'll probably forget I'm still in this game at some point. If you don't PM me I'm not opening comms with you.

If you wanna learn who REDACTED is send me information :skype_sun:
 
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