Dating mind games

Oh, jesus christ. I've had to coach at least 3 of my friends here about shit similar to this.

Basically, you have to act interested, but not. Here's how you do it.

First of all, fuck the first chick, don't let her stupidity cloud your judgments with the current female. Now, since you've called and left a message, give it a few days. If after 4-5 days she doesn't call (when she has your number), call again. If you get the machine again, leave a nonchalant message, along the lines of "hey, me and some people are going out, didn't know if you wanted to tag along". Not that exactly, but you get the idea. Make her know you're aware that you'd like her company, but don't be pushy about it. If she doesn't contact you after that, fuck her too and move on.

I use the goofy strategy. No, not the goofy strategy that gets me labeled friend on the dot, but the goofy flirty. And it works relatively well. Then when there's a serious moment, I pull out the intellectual card, and the female sees that I'm not JUST a big goofball (I love you goofers).

And while I'm at it, don't talk about ex girlfriends, don't talk about poop or anything related, don't talk about depressing subjects, don't act so immature where she thinks you're mentally retarded, and don't, I repeat, DON'T be too touchy. It's fine to make one or two subtle touchy flirty moments, but don't overdo it. If she doesn't reciprocate any touching back, you know you're moving too fast, or she's not attracted to you.

But above all, don't sell yourself as something you're not.
 
My advice: find one who isn't stupid.

My second piece of advice: Don't assume. It's entirely possible that she just wasn't there to get the phone. Try her again at some point. If she doesn't get back to you after a couple tries, then yeah, you probably will have to just give up on it. But don't pull some "my phone died" nonsense, just say "well I called you a couple times but you never got back to me, so I figured you weren't that interested." That would be best since it would actually be true.

Third piece of advice: you don't actually HAVE to have a girlfriend. I guarantee that if you just wait until you find someone who you really do hit it off with, rather than looking for someone under every nook and cranny, you will be happier for it. Learn to be content with yourself without having a significant other.

I know that guys love to believe girls are some insane race of psychotic mutants who operate on a completely irrational basis, but in actual fact they are just people and they can be as reliable or unreliable as we can. There are girls in the world who will not act that way. You'd be surprised how many. You're just finding the wrong ones because you're too eager.
 
teekay made a good point as well. Just because you meet a girl doesn't mean something has to happen.

I've met ~16 females I've been attracted to since I've returned to college, and I've only made attempts to date 4 of them. Just because the human has a vagina doesn't mean you have to go for it.
 
Okay. Seriouly.


I called her wednesday, didn't hear back...til today (friday). I saved her a seat in class today but she didn't show up. Apparently she skipped. This actually worked in my favor; I called her saying "<generic introduction> I noticed you weren't in class today. I got the notes for you. Just to remind you, we have a midterm a week from today and I do infact have a background in the subject matter thus far. If you want to study/see the notes, call me at _ _ _ -_ _ _ _ and we can set up a study time".

She called me within an hour, really enthusiastic to get together. I have something for monday with her. I just plan on going, learning her about insect morphology and being myself. If she decides to not me then whatever.

Fuuuuck I'm playing the game now, aren't I? I was so scared of these games when I was dating my ex (ugh) that I hoped I'd never have to do it. Why is it so brutal getting together with someone when there is clearly a mutual interest when getting together with a female who is just a friend right from the start is no big deal? Politics suck.


BTW I just found out my ex is already dating someone. Well, went to a movie with them, which I translate as brutal. I had a hideous day failing the entomology quiz (which was a joke cause it was so hard). ACK.

I love you smogoners.

Edit: @ kholdstaire: I learned that the hard way...lets just sat that fat chicks give better head cause they are hungry. I'm not joking, she is a best friend with my ex. One of the worst things of all time I've ever done...she got me drunk and took advantage of me. I have pushed a few female friends who have expressed interest in me away. This new girl though...fuuuuck. It was the two moments that she was herself I saw that made me fall for her. Aside from that, I suppose she is insanely hot.
 
The last time I was with a woman was a few years ago, it was tough to work out because we lives so far apart, but we loved each other so much, or at least I loved her. Everything seemed to go smoothly, but then she went off to college and decided to drop me out of nowehere. I got burned, bad. Haven't gotten back into "the game" since. Didn't really pursue anyone in college, and I'm not really looking now.

So don't worry if things don't work out majesty. It's better to be fucked around with early then to put all your heart into something only to have it mercillessly crushed, decimated, and scattered to the winds later.
 
Deck Knight said:
The last time I was with a woman was a few years ago, it was tough to work out because we lives so far apart, but we loved each other so much, or at least I loved her. Everything seemed to go smoothly, but then she went off to college and decided to drop me out of nowehere. I got burned, bad. Haven't gotten back into "the game" since. Didn't really pursue anyone in college, and I'm not really looking now.

So don't worry if things don't work out majesty. It's better to be fucked around with early then to put all your heart into something only to have it mercillessly crushed, decimated, and scattered to the winds later.
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The only reason I'm so scatterbrained about this and clearly a wreck is cause I'm getting back on the wagon from the love of my life (so far) and have definately forgotten all the games that go along with dating someone new.
 
try trading luvdiscs.

but seriously, if she freaks out because you called on time. wtf. you probably dont want to be with a mentally retarded chick anyway then.
 
Another bit of advice:

As much as it stings that your ex has gone out on a date, what the fuck are you doing? ATTEMPTING a date.

So, don't let your ex bother you, especially when you're doing the same thing she's doing. You're human, you're both going to move on... some just do it quicker than others.
 
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