Monotype Heliolisk [Normal] [QC 2/2] [GP 1/1]

[Harpp]

[SET]
name: All-out Attacker [Normal]
move 1:Thunderbolt
move 2: Focus Blast
move 3: Grass Knot
move 4: Volt Switch
item: Choice Specs / Expert Belt
ability: Dry Skin
nature: Timid
evs: 252 SpA / 4 SpD / 252 Spe

[SET COMMENTS]
On Normal-type teams, Heliolisk can act as a fearsome special attacker. Its above average Speed lets it outspeed common Pokemon like Indeedee and pivot out on them with Volt Switch to a suitable teammate if it cannot deal with them, allowing it to maintain momentum for the team. Grass Knot lets it pressure Ground-type teams and in combination with its STAB Electric-type move, it becomes a headache for Water-type teams to deal with, making such matchups relatively easier for Normal-type teams to handle. Focus Blast lets it beat Pokemon such as Ferrothorn, and Excadrill that normally can switch into Heliolisk. Its ability Dry Skin is quite handy too, as it lets it pivot on defensive Pokemon like Toxapex. Maximum Speed investment makes Heliolisk as fast as possible, and maximum Special Attack investment with a Choice Specs bolsters its damage output. Expert Belt can be used to bluff a Choice item and boost super effective damage, as it synergizes well with its coverage.

Snorlax and Braviary are good teammates for Heliolisk, as they both appreciate it dealing with troublesome Steel-type Pokemon such as Corviknight, Ferrothorn, and Excadrill. In return, Thick Fat Snorlax checks Fire-type Pokemon for Heliolisk, and Choice Scarf Braviary can beat Fighting-type Pokemon like Gallade for it. Choice Scarf Braviary and Heliolisk form a threatening VoltTurn core, too. Choice Band Diggersby appreciates Volt Switch support from Heliolisk, giving it more chances to wallbreak and deal with Pokemon like Ferrothorn with Fire Punch, relieving the pressure from Heliolisk. Indeedee can wallbreak for Heliolisk and provide it with Psychic Terrain, allowing Heliolisk to revenge kill Pokemon like Lucario for the team. Obstagoon as a teammate adds in additional wallbreaking potential, as it appreciates Volt Switch to find opportunities to come in and break teams down with STAB Knock Off for Heliolisk.

[CREDITS]
- Written by: [[Harpp, 320110]]
- <Normal> analysis by: [[Harpp, 320110]]
- Quality checked by: [[Confluxx, 480641], [Havens, 391540]]
- Grammar checked by: [[Estronic, 240732]]

 

[Harpp]

Ready for QC.

 

[Conflux]

I think Heliolisk should always run Focus Blast on Normal so it can break the core of Corviknight, Excadrill, and Ferrothorn. I'd remove Surf as Grass Knot already hits Ground-types and Thick Fat Snorlax can cover Fire-types.

Also mention how Heliolisk threatens Corviknight which can be a big threat to Normal. You talk about it in the second paragraph but I think it should be included in the first one due to how relevant and threatening Corviknight is right now.

Crawdaunt and Barraskewda would just click Close Combat against Normal so I'd remove that bit.

Since Heliolisk can now touch Ferrothorn with Focus Blast use a different example of Diggersby's Fire Punch or reword it.

QC 1/2

 

[Harpp]

Implemented QC 1. Ready for QC 2.

 

[Iguana]

amcheck

My Key
Blue-colored annotations are additions I've suggested.
Red-colored annotations are things I recommend be removed.
Turquoise-colored annotations are comments I've made to explain a change I've suggested.

[SET COMMENTS]


Paragraph 1:


-Heliolisk performs the role of an A(a)ll-out S(s)pecial attacker for Normal-type teams (the word “special” is not capitalized when it doesn’t refer to a stat). Its above average Speed lets it outspeed common Pokemon like Indeedee and pivot out on them with Volt Switch to a suitable teammate if it cannot deal with them. This allows allowing it to maintain momentum for the team (changed this to two sentences to give the reader more space to breathe; you packed a lot into one sentence, and it can be clearer to separate it into two). A combination of Grass Knot, Surf, and along with its STAB Electric-type moves lets it Heliolisk pressure Ground-, Water-, and Flying-type teams, making such matchups relatively easier for Normal teams to handle (corrections in this sentence to maintain parallel structure and to use the Oxford comma; changed the pronoun “it” to “Heliolisk” to remind users of the object of the indirect pronoun). Its ability Dry Skin is quite handy too, as it lets it pivot on defensive Pokemon like Toxapex and common cChoice-locked Water-type Pokemon like Barraskewda and Crawdaunt. Maximum Speed investment makes it as fast as possible, while Mmaximum Special aAttack investment with Life Orb as an item bolsterincreases its damage output (the change from “bolster” to “increases” is a recommendation based on a minute definitional difference; “increases” seemed to add more specificity here to what you’re saying). Expert bBelt can be used to bluff a cChoice item and to boost super effective damage as it synergizes well with its coverage.


Snorlax is a good teammate to Heliolisk as it appreciates Heliolisk checking troublesome defensive Pokemon like Toxapex for it so that it can asbecome a win condition late-game with its Curse set. Braviary also appreciates Heliolisk taking care of Pokemon like Corviknight, which it cannot touch,; in return, Braviary can deal with Fighting-type Pokemon like Gallade with its Choice Scarf set (this is a very common grammatical error here. It’s called a comma splice, which means you’re joining two independent clauses with a comma. But, it’s a quick fix since you have a lovely prepositional phrase already there, making the choice to switch this to a semicolon an easy one). Choice Band Diggersby appreciates Volt Switch support from Heliolisk, giving it more chances to wallbreak and deal with Pokemon like Ferrothorn with Fire Punch, which Heliolisk cannot break otherwise. Indeedee can wallbreak for Heliolisk and provide it with Psychic Terrain, allowing Heliolisk to revenge kill Pokemon like Lucario for the team.


[CREDITS]
- Written by: [[Harpp, 320110]]
- <Normal> analysis by: [[Harpp, 320110]]
- Quality checked by: [[<username1>, <userid1>], [<username2>, <userid2>]]
- Grammar checked by: [[<username1>, <userid1>]]

 

[Havens]

-Auxilary thing: remove Paragraph 1 and the dash point on the top of your Set Comments.
-Let's go w/ Specs over LO
-Probably worth mentioning that Scarf Braviary and Heliolisk form a threatening VoltTurn core.
-Add Obstagoon as a team option; having that additional wallbreaking potential + STAB Knock Off would be great for Heliolisk in breaking teams down.

QC 2/2

 

[Harpp]

Implemented QC 2. Ready for GP.

 

[Astra]

add remove (comments)

balls

[SET]
name: All-out Attacker
move 1: Thunderbolt
move 2: Focus Blast
move 3: Grass Knot
move 4: Volt Switch
item: Choice Specs / Life Orb
ability: Dry Skin
nature: Timid
evs: 252 SpA / 4 SpD / 252 Spe

[SET COMMENTS]
On Normal-type teams, Heliolisk performs the role of an All-out Special can act as a (put an adjective that would best describe it here) special attacker for Normal-type teams. Its above average Speed lets it outspeed common Pokemon like Indeedee and pivot out on them with Volt Switch to a suitable teammate if it cannot deal with them, (AC) allowing it to maintain momentum for the team. A The combination of Grass Knot, (RC) and Surf along with its STAB Electric-type moves lets it pressure Ground-, Water- and Flying-type teams, making such matchups relatively easier for Normal-type teams to handle. Its ability Dry Skin is quite handy too, (AC) as it lets it pivot on defensive Pokemon like Toxapex. Maximum Speed investment makes it Heliolisk as fast as possible, (AC) and maximum Special Attack investment with a Life Orb bolsters while Maximum Special attack investment with Life Orb as an item bolster its damage output. Expert belt Belt can be used to bluff a choice Choice item and to boost super effective damage, (AC) as it synergizes well with its coverage.

Snorlax and Braviary are good teammates to for Heliolisk, (AC) as they both appreciate Heliolisk it dealing with troublesome Steel-type Pokemon such as Corviknight, Ferrothorn, (AC) and Excadrill. In return, Thick Fat Snorlax checks Fire-type Pokemon for Heliolisk, (AC) and Choice Scarf Braviary can beat Fighting-type Pokemon like Gallade for it. Choice Scarf Braviary and Heliolisk form a threatening VoltTurn core, (AC) too. Choice Band Diggersby appreciates Volt Switch support from Heliolisk, giving it more chances to wallbreak and deal with Pokemon like Ferrothorn with Fire Punch, (AC) relieving the pressure from Heliolisk. Indeedee can wallbreak for Heliolisk and provide it with Psychic Terrain, (AC) allowing Heliolisk to revenge kill Pokemon like Lucario for the team. Obstagoon as a teammate adds in additional wallbreaking potential, (AC) as it appreciates Volt Switch to find opportunities to come-in (RH) and break teams down with STAB Knock Off for Heliolisk.

[CREDITS]
- Written by: [[Harpp, 320110]]
- <Normal> analysis by: [[Harpp, 320110]]
- Quality checked by: [[<Confluxx>, 480641], [<username2>, <userid2>]]
- Grammar checked by: [[Havens, 391540]] (i believed you mixed something up here )

1/1

 

[Harpp]

Implemented GP check. This is now done, thank you.

 

[Moosical]

Harpp can you please read through the GP check as well as your analysis and fix things?

• Set needs (normal) in the name
• Your first sentence needs an adjective in it like Esotronic described "On Normal-type teams, Heliolisk can act as a special attacker." means nothing alone
• Remove Surf from the paragraph, its not on the set anymore and you need a sentence about Focus Blast
• Esotronic just reworded the part of the sentence with Life Orb, yet you just removed it. We need to either have that sentence there or change the item on the set to Expert Belt. As written, it doesn't make sense. Edit: Decem told me the set is supposed to be Specs / Expert Belt - so if you change that, the text for this is fine
• Remove the <> from the credits.

 

[Harpp]

Implemented some of the things I missed out, I normally don't miss such things but I guess it happens sometimes, apologies for the trouble.

 

[Moosical]

Thanks, uploaded