Good evening, I'm Lorenzo Caccialupi "Italian Patriot" and I'll do unbiased rankings as requested by some.
The rankings will be done thanks to the Wolfhunter Algorithm, which is based on the number of managers and player, the number of italian managers and player, the allocated budget on italian players confronted with the total of the budget spent, and a fluctuating value given by how much italian the team name is. The formula is written down for whoever is interested in theory of wolfism.
After my calculations the correct rankings are:
- Salerno Seadras - very italian team, the italian legend Tricking himself and a very less famous right-hand delivering one of the most EGL-lookinglike team, with also the name reminding of the infamous Salernitana's mascotte, the seahorse. Enzonana counted for half an italian (excel rounded it but its 9,5 not 10) as he is an honorary italian, being ugly, fat, hairy and with an ambiguous aura, while also for some reason looking a lot like Geolier. They definetely can talk in italian in their discord, staggering performance with an off the chart caccialupi coefficient;
- Anna Pepe Ponytas - Raiza and Paolode, who decided to cut off every tie with the third raider manager, like in an off style Aldo Giovanni and Giacomo sketch, with Tricking acting as the good for nothing Aldo Baglio, put on a decent draft although they also decided to pass on on almost every good italian player was in the pool. The coefficiant still looks decent as they keep the traditional Anna Pepe name for the brand, although she is fucking terrible as a singer she remains the voice of a generation of italians (I sigh, ndr). Anyway they might be able to teach some italian slang and lore to the others, making this clownery of a tour at least decent for the sake of the italian culture;
- Morella Morelulls - I was quite unsure on how many points for the name I should've given but I gave some because I think it fits the lore. Anyway official italian Madara (for everyone but the RUWC administrators btw) and one of the pillars of the italian community collaborate to create a good looking team, with at least the decency to buy 1 italian for the sake of the patriotism. Good luck to them anyway;
- Kyoto Kingambits - The last team with an italian manager fails to come up with an italian name. Staggering, I hope the italian management will take this in consideration for the next SWC;
- Everyone else is not italian so it's whatever.
Thanks for reading, subscribe to my Substack
https://trickingporco.substack.com/