Interview with Skitty

Interview and flavor by Antemortem. Art by Blue Frog and Faxxifer.
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My bicycle came to a screeching halt, my hands frantically clinging to the handlebars and crinkling a small sheet of paper. I'd received the paper in the mail after losing to the cheap nerd that campaigned for votes and beat me in the poll. I raised it to my face, squinting to get a better view of the picture printed on it. It was a scribble of a building with a young woman holding an umbrella and splashing in a puddle, with the word "salt" written in caps across the top. Knowing the target of my interview, I angrily crumpled the paper and dropped it in the dumpster in front of the very same building depicted in the image, guiding my bike through a rusty back door.

Inside the abandoned building, a dark, dank room lay before me. I could just hear a buzzing of LARPers clanging swords, crying out from fake lashes to their sides, and commands from their superiors in the distance. The echoes resounded brilliantly, and just as I was about to leave for fear of being in the wrong place, the lights flickered on, and before me sat a small man in a large throne that seemed oddly unfitting given his small stature. He wore a long pink robe and atop his head sat a crown with tail-like appendages branching from all sides. What's going on here? I wondered to myself as sword clangs continued in the background. The man stood from the throne and brought me a glass of water from the arm of the chair, giving me a curt smile as he handed it over.

"For your saltiness, my friend."

Hey, Skitty! If you don't mind, we can jump right into it.

Hey Ante, thanks for interviewing me!

Tell me a little about yourself: Who are you, where are you from, and why should we care about you?

I'm currently a student living in Wisconsin who spends way too much time on PS. I'm a global Mod on the sim, and I own the Roleplaying, ORAS, and Free Time rooms.

Neat! Sometimes I forget Roleplaying exists except when I'm redirecting someone to it. What exactly keeps you going to those rooms (besides the fact you're room Owner), especially the more creative ones such as Roleplaying?

Even though I rarely RP on my main alt, I really enjoy roleplaying. The room can come off as pretty weird at times, but we have a great community with wonderful users, and the room and RPs can be really fun! The Roleplaying room definitely had a shaky beginning, but I'm very proud to be able to say that I'm part of the community today and that I helped make the room what it is now. ORAS is also a very fun room. It's a great place to hang out, relax, and stay up to date on the latest Pokémon game news. Free Time is a smaller room, but I definitely love the fun times we have, such as selfie sharing and cool minigames that we occasionally have there.

The Roleplaying community sounds surprisingly inviting, considering how people tend to view the room.

I sipped my water: oddly refreshing. I'm pretty sure I heard someone replicate the sounds a laser in a sci-fi flick would make. What exactly was the genre of roleplay going on back there...?

So you're pretty well invested in PS as a staff member—do you dabble in any rooms just for the fun of it?

The Wi-Fi room is really fun. I've probably gotten like two boxes of Pokémon just from winning giveaways alone. It seems intimidating, but it's really easy to just jump in and start trading. I also love Monotype. The metagame and users in the room are great, and I love the feeling I get when I stall people to death with Tropius on my mono-Grass team.

What kind of shmuck uses Tropius? smh.

Only players that possess the extremely high amount of skill that I have.

Someone that had "died" in the roleplay behind Skitty held back obvious laughter.

Your Monotype GXE is 63—tell me more pls. Anyway, let's get into your personal life a little bit. From what part of the world do you hail, and how would you describe it?

u-um, the amount of ladder decay has just been really high lately! I was at like, 200 GXE or something the last time I checked.

Anyway, I was born and raised in southeastern Wisconsin. The people around here are nice, but as cliché as it sounds, the weather sucks. In summer, it's really hot and humid, and in winter it's freezing and snowy. There also isn't as much cheese in Wisconsin as everyone thinks, sadly.

Then what do you guys eat? 9.9

Not sure about the other cheeseheads, but I love Puerto Rican food (especially if I cook it!). I really enjoy cooking, whether it be Puerto Rican family recipes or french fries from my deep fryer. I'm going to go to school to be a chef, so cooking anything is pretty fun to me. Even if I do become a professional chef, McDonalds will always be my favorite. <3

McDonalds holds a dear place in all our hearts so I don't blame you. What's this about Puerto Rican food, though? Is that inspired by your family's origin, or just a personal preference?

I'm half Puerto Rican, so I've grown to love Puerto Rican food, especially when my aunt cooks it. My favorite dish is probably Arroz con Gandules. I made it for a folk fair in middle school once, and everyone loved it. Or maybe they just liked that it was different from the German sausage that everybody else brought in...

What do you have against Germans? Actually, let's not get into that. Instead, I'd rather you tell us the mystery of what possessed you to choose "Skitty" as a name, rather than the alternatively superior cats: Liepard and mama Delcatty?

I swear a group of people collectively meowed. Skitty is confirmed leader of the furrykin of PS.

Well, Skitty is my favorite Pokémon, so right after I found out about the chat in mid-2012, I quickly registered this name. This isn't the only name I've used though, I've gone through quite a few. I used "Dustox" a lot when I first joined, then "Bravo101" and then came back to this name. I'm really sad that I didn't scoop up the name "Delcatty" though, because I would love to have it now. Not upset about not getting "Liepard," since Liepard is dumb and annoying.

Speaking of Skitty's evolution, you've been recently promoted to Moderator on PS! How are you feeling about this?

Yeah! I'm really happy and thankful to the people who got me here. Shoutout to haunter, Jasmine, Goddess Briyella, Dell, Reverb, Blitzamirin, Beowulf, Nani Man, Spydreigon, and a ton of others for being great mentors to me. I probably wouldn't be here today if it weren't for all of the great friends I made.

Do you think your new modship will bring you more opportunities to campaign for votes in future polls?


I took another sip of water as Skitty caressed the Skitty doll in his hand. I hadn't seen it before. Was it always there?

I look forward to it, then! Cheeky nerd. To close out this interview, what is one thing about PS that you would change in a heartbeat if given the opportunity?

I would definitely delete Lobby rofl.

Why exactly would you delete a place where users of profound thought and high level discussions culminate?

Because I'm too dumb to understand the profound discussions that take place in Lobby.

As one might expect from someone from Wisconsin. :( But anyway, thanks for taking the time to answer my questions, Skitty!

No problem, thanks for interviewing me! Maybe next time you'll be picked for the interview. You never know, maybe 4th time's a charm!

I downed the last of my water and turned to leave. As I neared the door, a collective hum of cats purring got louder and louder in my ear, leading me to a dead sprint out of the salt factory.

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