So my fellow trans/nonbinary friends how did you pick your chosen name? Personally I really love Robin from One Piece so that's why I picked her!
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- Thread starter dhelmise
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It started out as a bit where everyone in my groupchat changed their usernames to "basic white girl names" like Emily and Sarah (no offense Emily and Sarah) and I just never changed my name from Ashley after that.
fym basic
I picked a name that honestly just felt right. One I clicked with. One that felt like me.
Then I realized after picking it that, oh, this is just the name of my favorite character from a game I played in 2015-16, when I was first figuring out my gender identity. I subconsciously associated this character with me being trans. So not only am I a stereotype (named after a fictional character), I fucking Pavlov'd myself into picking my name.
(i still like the name the background is just too funny not to tell)
I was just thinking of various names lying in bed trying to sleep one night and when I was considering Emily the name Evelyn popped into my head and I instantly took a liking to it, I just feel like it really fits me
I really loved the nickname “Mika”, and was originally going to go with that for a while. When talking to my parents, I asked them “if I had the correct gender marker at brith, what would you have named me”? And they responded with “probably Michaela, since you’d have still been named after your grandfather”. I didn’t want my dead name in my new name, and I loved my nickname, so I decided to go with “Mikayla”, which is what felt the most right!
have a few diff name stories
before i was rose and was still experimenting with names i actually went by phione. i think we all know what phione is
then i picked rose - no particular reason, seemed pretty
ppl started calling me rosie so i added that as well
i liked botw so i picked mipha as well because i also wanted a unique name to balance out the kinda basic ones
theres a bunch of other names i added that id soon ditch and i would eventually drop rosie as well
next name iirc would be serena, this was picked because of me hyperfixating on the xy anime for a bit there and like she just like me (this ones unused enough that it may be on the chopping block however)
after this i chose violet, no reason, really, again just a pretty name
then because my username on most things was now shadowspussy, i chose the name shadow because i liked it. oddly people dont call me this one more
then someone called me "pussy" and i figured "well if he likes it i have no qualms abt just going by pussy now"
then i dropped mipha cuz ppl hadnt used it in years
So, flashback to sixth grade for me. It was my first day and my science teacher was beginning to assign seats to everyone. The thing with this classroom was that it was two people per table and it was going to be your tablemate for the entire semester, so this was something I was paying attention to.
Now, the person I sat next to was a girl. And her name? Bella. She was this short half mexican half white girl, and I remember me not liking her much since I found her pretty annoying and not a good worker when it came to group assignments and the like. But, despite that, the name Bella just kind of attached to me in a way. This was before I began to present as a girl online or even really knew what being trans meant, so I did not really know why at the time but even then I thought in my head "wow, Bella is a really really cute name!" (Remember: I did not like this girl at ALL. I just thought the name Bella was cute.)
Fast forward to a few years ago when I came out after like a year of denial, I needed a name to pick for myself. The name Bella came to mind again, and I was like.. wait... thats cute. I like that. I eventually went with it with the plans of it only being a temporary name, but it just has stuck since. At this point, my mind defaults to Bella instead of my deadname now, which I think is a good indicator that its a name thats here to stay.
ngl i genuinely have no recollection of picking my name. it feels like i woke up like a matrix pod person and was just May
baby names site
After years of denial, I figured I finally was trans. Was struggling with a name, but I knew my mother like the name Jasmine. I looked at what the name meant (gift from god) and that’s exactaly what I wanted.
same experience verbatim down to the name
I missed the conversation on growing out of homophobia while it was happening but I did want to share that as a kid I was raised to be a homophobe and now I'm a raging guy kisser who has a private twitter with 5 of my closest friends chronicling every single thing the guy I've liked on and off for 4 years does. Growth 
Speaking of which (and some of you may already know this)...
For the longest time I was afraid to "change" my labels - I felt like once I picked something, I had to stick to it or else I'd be accused of lying? Or people would be like "oh so you can't decide" or something?
In my case it wasn't really changing labels, but rather discovering more about who I've been all along. There were times where I'd say I thought an actress looked pretty which was purely me admiring her style with absolutely no attraction present whatsoever, and that'd be used as a case of me liking a girl. At the time, it'd confuse me a lot because I didn't actually experience any attraction - I just genuinely did think the actress looked good, but I thought that was the case for everyone else because it'd be presented to me as such. And, well, it'd be the case for actors as well and there'd still be absolutely no sexual attraction there. I don't find them hot, I find them beautiful. I think their style looks good, but I'm not attracted to them. I wouldn't wanna date them solely because of their looks, but I'd be open to grabbing a coffee with them so we can talk about life or going to the mall so we can talk wardrobes. But if I talked to someone and they seemed nice, I'd absolutely be open to pursuing a romantic relationship with them (although it's unlikely, considering how long I've liked this one guy for).
Just because that was the case for me doesn't mean it has to be the case for you. Just because learning that I was still seeing my life through a comphet lens doesn't mean that's the only reason that exists for changing labels - sexuality is fluid, and I want to tell anyone who's reading this that if you feel like your attraction has changed, then you're valid for that. And if you don't feel like your attraction has changed, that's cool too. Labels are labels, and they can be immensely helpful for us to describe ourselves, but we define our labels - they don't define us. Your journey's your own, and someone changing their labels three times in a month is just as valid as someone who's known who they are all along. I'm putting this here both as a disclaimer that my story doesn't have to speak for anyone else's experience, but also because I feel like both people who are queer and people who are allys can often (unintentionally) influence someone into thinking a label fits them when it doesn't. After all, it's what happened with me. And that isn't always done with ill intent - I don't hold any grudges against the people who helped me figure out who I was, because they're good people and we're all growing up in a world where comphet is very much a thing that influences all of our ways of thinking and existing. But no matter how long it takes for you to figure out what labels you prefer, or if you prefer labels at all (unlabelled homies I see you and love you), you're valid.
Anyway, tl;dr: hi Smogon! I'm Ren and I'm from this country.
Speaking of which (and some of you may already know this)...
homoromantic* turns out I was also a victim of comphet (compulsive heterosexuality for any lurkers who don't know what the term means and may be too shy to ask) as a kid. Still asexual, though.
For the longest time I was afraid to "change" my labels - I felt like once I picked something, I had to stick to it or else I'd be accused of lying? Or people would be like "oh so you can't decide" or something?
In my case it wasn't really changing labels, but rather discovering more about who I've been all along. There were times where I'd say I thought an actress looked pretty which was purely me admiring her style with absolutely no attraction present whatsoever, and that'd be used as a case of me liking a girl. At the time, it'd confuse me a lot because I didn't actually experience any attraction - I just genuinely did think the actress looked good, but I thought that was the case for everyone else because it'd be presented to me as such. And, well, it'd be the case for actors as well and there'd still be absolutely no sexual attraction there. I don't find them hot, I find them beautiful. I think their style looks good, but I'm not attracted to them. I wouldn't wanna date them solely because of their looks, but I'd be open to grabbing a coffee with them so we can talk about life or going to the mall so we can talk wardrobes. But if I talked to someone and they seemed nice, I'd absolutely be open to pursuing a romantic relationship with them (although it's unlikely, considering how long I've liked this one guy for).
Just because that was the case for me doesn't mean it has to be the case for you. Just because learning that I was still seeing my life through a comphet lens doesn't mean that's the only reason that exists for changing labels - sexuality is fluid, and I want to tell anyone who's reading this that if you feel like your attraction has changed, then you're valid for that. And if you don't feel like your attraction has changed, that's cool too. Labels are labels, and they can be immensely helpful for us to describe ourselves, but we define our labels - they don't define us. Your journey's your own, and someone changing their labels three times in a month is just as valid as someone who's known who they are all along. I'm putting this here both as a disclaimer that my story doesn't have to speak for anyone else's experience, but also because I feel like both people who are queer and people who are allys can often (unintentionally) influence someone into thinking a label fits them when it doesn't. After all, it's what happened with me. And that isn't always done with ill intent - I don't hold any grudges against the people who helped me figure out who I was, because they're good people and we're all growing up in a world where comphet is very much a thing that influences all of our ways of thinking and existing. But no matter how long it takes for you to figure out what labels you prefer, or if you prefer labels at all (unlabelled homies I see you and love you), you're valid.
Anyway, tl;dr: hi Smogon! I'm Ren and I'm from this country.
i mean you all will probably never guess mine………. totally….
i was like. Shit. need a name i guess. this one works. a little over 5 years later and it’s on my IDs now. still works. I wanted something that didnt end with an “ee” sound, wasn’t stereotypical, would feel fine when im 35, and didnt have a million dumb nicknames. that’s my advice to the people in this thread, think about the future too.
emily is a sick name
its kinda embarassing but there was someone i used to talk to who i really looked up to whose name was based on a certain mineral, so after i kind of had made peace w my thoughts and resolutions some time after we stopped talking, which sparked it i think, i decided to name myself with a similar inspiration to signify my growth (but i kind of was already looking for something else to go by)... i just page hopped wikipedia until i found a mineral of the same family whose name would feel right. i arrived at chlorapathite, and really liked it :)
i've never really been able to describe it, but i've always thought it was kinda corny to do... and kind of arrogant? whatever, it's been many years now, i really like the name except when People Ask Questions (namely irl)
When I figured out for sure that I am a woman, I had two names in mind for myself and couldn't decide on either, so I told all of my friends to use either Maris or Bonibelle depending on which one they liked more. And Maris won by a LOT.
I have no idea where I got the name Maris from. I just remembered one of my characters had the name, so when i thought about her i went "this name is literally just me" and took it for myself. I just knew! Bonibelle I just took from the adventure time lesbian, teehee
I ended up deciding to use Maris for my first name and Bonibelle as the second name, so i truly ended up with both of them in the end. To this day, 3 years later i still love my own name. So much euphoria comes to me when i hear people using it. I wouldn't change it for anything.
Can I say that i second this? i've been looking at baby name websites and so far none have particularly clicked intensely with me so far, only very subtly or slightly as "yes this could be nice maybe". I'm grateful this topic is growing a bit here, this made me think of someting and I hope it's not too derailing.
How important you all would say that the name you choose matches your ethnicity or culture? I ask this not for me but my good friend who has for a long time struggled to find a good given name for themself, they're deep into the nonbinary spectrum and I think would prefer gender neutral to very slightly masculine names, and they once brought up that they wouldn't feel good taking names that match a culture or country they lack ancestry from, while their actual ancestries (Brazilian and italian) both have a severe lack of gender neutral names.
I agree that it'd be awkward if not potentially "culturally apropriating" to, say, be a south american with a japanese name when you have no connection to asian ethnicity at all, but I don't particularly feel it'd be too awful to pick a name from a country that I have only slight "ancestrality" to (I'm part spanish, but i personally don't think i'd relate to either typical portuguese or spanish names at all)
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Stole it from someone on discord that I had an argument with
Unfathomably based
exactly my thought process
i have been lurking this board for longer than some of y'all have... been alive i think? and i just wanted to say that this thread even existing when i was a gay 16yo wanting to find out why people liked skarmory and blissey so much would be almost unthinkable. this thread makes me happy and i wish a lot of love to all of you
skarmbliss is wlw/mlm solidarity <3
Hey guys I’m just looking for some advice and stuff rn
I would consider myself to be a lesbian. I love women, pretty much always have, and I can’t imagine dating a man as a woman.
However that’s the biggest part that is confusing me right now, I feel like I would love to be a man dating another man. Like I want to be a guy spoon feeding a pint of Ben and Jerry’s chocolate fudge brownie into my boyfriends mouth. But I wouldn’t consider myself to be bisexual because the thought of doing the same and being a woman makes me want to gag, but if I image myself as a man it actually seems pretty nice. If that even makes any sense?
Maybe it’s because I’m a little more butch or something or sometimes forget I’m a woman? It’s not like I’m uncomfortable being a woman or anything, it’s a fact that I’m fine with and I love being openly lesbian.
I think I’m probably just weird or something but I wanted to post here to see if anyone relates or understands.
I would consider myself to be a lesbian. I love women, pretty much always have, and I can’t imagine dating a man as a woman.
However that’s the biggest part that is confusing me right now, I feel like I would love to be a man dating another man. Like I want to be a guy spoon feeding a pint of Ben and Jerry’s chocolate fudge brownie into my boyfriends mouth. But I wouldn’t consider myself to be bisexual because the thought of doing the same and being a woman makes me want to gag, but if I image myself as a man it actually seems pretty nice. If that even makes any sense?
Maybe it’s because I’m a little more butch or something or sometimes forget I’m a woman? It’s not like I’m uncomfortable being a woman or anything, it’s a fact that I’m fine with and I love being openly lesbian.
I think I’m probably just weird or something but I wanted to post here to see if anyone relates or understands.