How many of you have a "thing" for a friend?

Blue Ditto

Blue Ditto

Happy Valentines Day!

And on that note, but originally completely unrelated to the candy and hearts and lovey-dovey theme and originally was going to post this a couple of days earlier, who here has had (and maybe still has) a "thing" for a friend? You know exactly what I'm talking about.

Not like it's unusual, of course--these things happen all the time, but sometimes one needs to vent a little. How much do you think you like this friend; do you think the feeling/attraction is mutual? Also, if you do have a crush on another one of your friends and you're currently in a relationship, would you consider it emotionally cheating, or would you consider it fine as long as you don't act upon your feelings at all?

I myself have a "thing" for a friend. I never did, do, or will do anything about it, though, not only because I already love someone else and am not going to trash a stable relationship for a crush but because he's also not single and he's my best friend/brother thing. It'd be weird. Of course, if we end up single down the road together and he shows interest, I don't think I'd be completely adverse to a small fling just to see how things go. Also, I personally don't think it's emotionally cheating as long as nothing is done--just keep it to yourself or write it as a footnote in your journal, or vent on threads like these and then be all like "pssh, let's move on with life".

So, what do you have to say on this subject?
 
man, i was totally going to link that...

for some reason one of my really close friends and i have dated sporadically throughout the 6 years we have known each other. we'll date for 3-4 months then realize we can't stand each other and 3-4 months later we'll be dating again. its a pretty sweet deal for me because "friends with benefits" are the best kind :). i wouldn't say i have a "thing" for her though.
 
I've got a thing for my philosophy teacher who also happens to be a friend. I've no idea if it's reciprocated or not, but I doubt it'll ever be acted on - it's far too much fun just flirting.
 
Haha, just started reading the ladder theory. This is seriously great. I feel kind of stupid and disconnected for not having known about it before though...and I'm getting really paranoid about the pop-ups. :/

Oh well. Worth it.

PS: I can't wait to be an old lady. Then I can check out all the hot guys as much as I want and the guys will just be, "o_0" or "she's just a cute little old lady w/e"... xD
 
Blue Ditto said:
PS: I can't wait to be an old lady. Then I can check out all the hot guys as much as I want and the guys will just be, "o_0" or "she's just a cute little old lady w/e"... xD
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Lol you're the first girl i've ever heard said they actually wanna grow old.

As for me having a thing for a friend, pretty much every female that i have an at least average relationship with, excluding family of course hehe. I can't seem to help myself either; I guess it's a natural guy thing :(
 
Yes, I do. I had it back when she was married, and after she got divorced, and after she realized that she was a lesbian. Damnit.
 
I usually find my female friends attractive, so maybe that counts as a "thing", but no where near to make a move on one of them though. Maybe because i was on a relationship that finished the past week,thus being loyal as i was i didn't see other woman appealing

The ladder theory part about "exes" just made me laugh, i just wonder if we will never get back and if she is looking for someone better.

That last was off-topic, couldn't help to vent it in here sorry.
 
That ladder theory is hilarious.

I had a thing for a friend that I'd known for around a year or so. Acted on it, and now we've been going out for a little over a year and a half. I didn't say anything until I was ninty percent sure it was mutual, didn't want to ruin the friendship and all that lark.

As for the bit about having a thing for someone other than your significant other...it can't be cheating unless you act on it really. You can't turn emotions and feelings on and off, but you can say "ok I feel x for y but I'm not going to do anything about it".

The grass is always looks greener on the other side, so those kind of feelings are natural, in my opinion.
 
Now that I've read all of Ladder Theory, life makes sense. I guess that's why ignoring girls I didn't like didn't work, and why I'm probably not gonna have a gf for a while. I think I'm on the friends ladder for almost every girl I know. Dammit.

But yeah, I do have a "thing" for most of my female friends. It's probably not mutual in any cases.
 
I've got a thing for my ex girl friend's good friend. But i think if i pursued that it could lead to disaster. Anyone else in my boat?
 
I won't say it is accurate, for I could never test it, but it is a very interesting read indeed, whether it is true or not.

As for this, yes, yes I do. And she has a boyfriend.
 
KOL40 said:
To the user who posted the "ladder" link:

Thank you for depressing me further, asshole!


-Have a nice day.
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Don't worry. It took me a while, but I overcame it. So can you.

But I never made a successful jump.
 
I never have "things" for women who aren't my friends. It's not like I want to develop an actual, serious relationship with a stranger.
 
Generally speaking, I'm attracted to pretty much all of my friends in SOME way (not necessarily physically)

But yeah, who doesn't have a thing for a friend; most people are just wise enough not to act on it. Of course, there are the occassional few who actually work it out. *shrugs*
 
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