Nah I can't let there be no PRs... I stream of conscious'd this in 1.5 hours. for optimal reading experience put on some ambient music and read it in my voice!
Big Baller Barraskewdas
SV Bo7: eblurb
SV: Nuxl
SV: rssp1
SS Bo7: crow crumbs
SS: Aliss
SM: Rellia
ORAS: Inkreativ
BW: Taka
Subs: Fancy1, NTG cuz IDK, Spenceair
First up, we have Barras alumnus crow "I'm not signing up" crumbs accompanied by 1v1 enjoyer and DPP phenom Nuxl, who signed up spontaneously to take over last years winning franchise. From last year, they retained Taka for 10k, BW 1v1 player and an enjoyer of mons. Probably the most valuable retain in the tour who should put up another good record in the snooze tier.
In SV Bo7, they dropped 20k for the headliner of this team in now 3 time barraskewda eblurb (Class of PL VI, VII). He has a combined record of 13-5 the past two pls, unfortunately this guy has the tft nerf so this is a fat overpay and will probably not be worth it. At his highs though, he can give this team the firepower it needs. The other SV slots are taken up by Nuxl, who smoked everyone in DPP which should be a good indicator of how he does against this SV Bo5 pool. They also have rssp1, who I guess is a mafia industry plant? Shrug. In SS Bo7 is bird himself, who should surpass his two win quote this tour because I think these days he's developed a really good understanding of the SS tier and how he likes to play it, which I think is really important these days in 1v1 old gens. He'll likely be building for the SS Bo5 slot in Alice, a good choice for a person to pass teams to. Considering she signed up, I figure she has the motivation to play and do well even though I haven't seen her play in ages. In SM, we have another Barras alumnus Rellia (Class of PL VI), who did well in WC in this tier and should be able to perform in this SM pool straight out of 2019. In ORAS we have Inkreativ, top tier ORAS player. While Ink is really good, the ORAS pool is strong, so it's unclear how good of a record he'll get. Then in BW they have Masayoshi Takanaka. For subs, we have Fancy1 (I better not see the account BBB Giddey appear) who they started rssp over, NTG Cuz IDK, 1v1 history extraordinaire and solid builder, and Spenceair who idk but I think they are into SV. Not the worst subs overall.
Overall, I think this team is strong and should make playoffs with relative ease. They have a lot of good pieces and should have a good vibe based on the past teammates and personalities they have. On the other hand, their SV is questionable and they do lack star power if eblurb doesn't light on fire again, which are factors that could cause them to falter in playoffs.
Playful Panchams
SV Bo7: Kaif
SV: Vertigo
SV: avarice
SS Bo7: Close
SS: feen
SM: bea
ORAS: LittEleven
BW: QWILY
Subs: Freddy Kyogre, lemonstre1
Last year's runner ups are again managed by Kaif, this time joined by fellow mafia and TFT aficionado LittEleven. I forgot these two weren't on the same team last year NGL but they are now! This team had no retains, then as if they were in a mock draft dropped 30k (thirty thousand) on superstar SS player Close. 30k? Guys? 30k is way too much for anyone, BUT THEN they elected to drop 18500 (eighteen thousand five hundred) on Vertigo??? GUYS????????????? I don't think he's touched 1v1 since world cup so I would say
WE ARE LIVING IN NORTH KOREA but he's a jerk pick so whatever man. Also, idk what happened in the auction to where another team bid him that high in the first place. Let's see how the rest of their team turned out!
In SV Bo7 we have Kaif, global cup finalist and grandmaster TFT player. He never puts up good records in regular season and I don't really expect that to change. In SV, we have the aforementioned 18.5k Vertigo, who did go 5-2 last year but the tier is quite a bit different now, and avarice, 2 time wc champion playing no games. I kinda thought they would start lemonstre here, I think he was on SEU and plays SV? plunder did well last year so avarice can, although no delemon this time. In SS Bo7 we have Close, probably the best or at least top 3 players in the entire tour. He'll do well but he isn't gonna do 30k because that's well, not possible. In SS Bo5 we have feen, a fellow Bangladeshi. I think they played in global cup and swiss? Not sure but it wasn't in SS, which is historically a tier non mainers don't do well in. In SM we have bea, who had a mini ascension recently and is one of the modern players in the SM pool. Does that mean she does well? Unclear, but I think so. In ORAS we have LittEleven, arguably the best in the pool considering his ORAS record the past year. In BW we have QWILY, who is going to get the brokens passed to him and will do fine. For subs we have the aforementioned lemonstre and Freddy Kyogre, who is good for 1-2 wins off the bench but Not More.
Overall, while this team has some good pieces, we got BIS Syndra (Close) and Fated Emblem on Ornn (Litt), but the rest of the board is pretty much 1 star units, so this team is gonna need to high roll otherwise it's gonna be a fast 8th.
Metro Boomin' Megarays
SV Bo7: neomon
SV: Slip
SV: Marshme1to
SS Bo7: glitched
SS: luser
SM: Iron Crusher
ORAS: torterraxx
BW: Palestine
Subs: LongRat, Frostyicelad
DEG returns to manage the megarays, this time alongside his kitten DezShizzels, longtime 1v1 player and manager. They retain Slip Gilgeous Alexander from last years semifinals campaign for 10k to play SV. Contrary CM incident aside, Slip was solid last year and do fine again this year.
In SV Bo7 we have the neomonster, Megarays franchise player who went for pennies considering some of the other prices in the auction. Neomon is just a good player, so he should be able to hold his own despite the new gen. He did it in SS, after all. Alongside Slip in SV bo5 we have Marshme1to, 1v1pl and UMPL champion who will be able to hold his own in the bo5 pool. In SS Bo7, we have glitched, who has been one of the best SS players the past few tours and is positioned to put up another good performance alongside luser, a solid SS mainer and role player. In SM we have Iron Crusher, back from the dead. The last time they were active they put up good numbers, and the SM pool being from 2019 bodes well for them. However, they still could be crust and do poorly. In ORAS, we have torterraxx playing his first PL. He's a good player but I've always found his ORAS teams bland, though I'm not sure how much that'll matter these days. For subs we have LongRat who I see do SV stuff and frosty, who is good at everything but winning games as a sub.
Overall, this team is really good, with a lot of good pieces, but has some question marks, including their SV and whether IC is crust or not because they don't have high quality subs. Still should be a shoe in for playoffs and to contend for the title.
RPS Rhyperiors
SV Bo7: Lumii
SV: Murm
SV: Kala chasmah
SS Bo7: Here Comes Team Charm!
SS: Fragments
SM: Elo Bandit
ORAS: Synonimous
BW: dreepy
Subs: ihbst, gyffyrd, Clementine
Elo Bandit and Murmdog return to manage RPS for the third straight year after making playoffs the past two. To help them make a third, they retain Lumi, who went 7-0 last year in SV Bo7 + 1 BW win (dodged delemon for little reason?), and appears ready to do it again.
For their other SV slots, we have Murm, who has performed well in the current gen in PL historically and should be able to again in this SV meta. Alongside him is Kala chasmah, an up and coming nightmare to schedule with who should be able to hold their own in SV3. In SS Bo7, we have HCTC back from the dead. Not sure how well they will be able to adjust to recent trends in the SS meta, so they may struggle. Their match vs Mishlef week 1 could be an indicator of how the rest of their season goes. They have Fragments alongside them in the SS Bo5, who did excellent last pl and should be in a good situation to do it again here as one of the best players in the Bo5 pool. In SM, we have Tyler Bandit himself, who has historically not done very well in pl, but did have an excellent performance in the most recent OGPL and has been one of, if not the most active SM player the past however many years, which should bode well for him in this player pool. Elo is joined by fellow US West player Synonimous in ORAS, who has been a demon in world cup in this tier but hasn't played ORAS in pl before. I rate Synon highly as a player and he should be able to perform well even in this ORAS pool. In BW they have dreepy who was on their OGPL team and will just get passed teams by Lumii or whoever and do average. For subs they randomly have gyffyrd??? Then ihbst who I think does SV stuff, and Clementine who played some games last year on the David Nadal's and I think won one.
Overall, this is probably the best lu RPS has had and should make playoffs and contend for the trophy again even if Lumii falls back to Earth due to the strength of their other slots. This franchise always seems to fail in semis though. Will this be the year they make it over the hump?
Trigger-Happy Thwackeys
SV Bo7: Blanched
SV: DripLegend
SV: Miyoko
SS Bo7: Mishlef
SS: xdRudi.exe
SM: Jamez
ORAS: Waylaid
BW: LpZ
Subs: Feaniix, One Last Kiss, Ina fable
The original manager of the Thwackeys RADUOLOGY, fresh off his unban, joins 1v1TL and circuit champion DripLegend after they finished in 5th last year. They got to self buy Drip for 11k because he doesn't win games, but elected not to buy RADUOLOGY because he didn't want to spend that much on himself BECAUSE HE IS CRUST!!!!!! So where did that 18.5k go? Basically exactly where one might have expected.
In SV Bo7 we have Blanched, who in his last 1v1pl campaign before being sent to the shadow realm for a year had an excellent tour. He qualled for LT so I assume he's in tune with SV and should do well here. Joining him in SV is Drip, who indeed does not win games but actually plays the tier which should work in his favor in the SS Bo5 pool. They are also joined by Miyoko, who has won quite a few SV games in random tours and should do fine in SV 3. In SS Bo7 we have Mishlef, who isn't as bad as he plays but he plays real bad sometimes. Like bird, he has a vision for how he plays the tier which is good, but will he play well or overthink himself into 2-5? Time will tell. Joining him in SS is the dump 2 Kassadin enjoyer Rudi, who I think played SV in world cup? He should be able to get some wins with the support he has on this squad. In SM we have Jamez fresh off his tourban, I'm pretty sure he did well in 2019 world cup in this tier so he should be fine in this player pool. In ORAS we have Waylaid, who has played and done well in this tier in world cup. Waylaid has done average in pl since the original barras, and will probably continue to do so in this ORAS pool. In BW they have LpZ who I see play like every tour on smogon and should do ok with RADU and other's assistance. Where is A Hero's Destiny though? For subs they have tour players Feaniix and One Last Kiss, and Ina fable who I don't actually know. /shrug
Overall this team screams mid to me but can contend for playoffs if things work out. They have a lot of players who you would expect to do average, so it's unclear who exactly or what combination of people can put them over the hump. They also might struggle to find the right combination of their role players, which could hurt them.
Drive-by Dragapults
SV Bo7: delemon
SV: bern
SV: rumia
SS Bo7: zo
SS: Bomb21XD
SM: Krytocon
ORAS: SwordIsBored
BW: Opchurtle100
Subs: Lialiabeast, Eeveekid10, ZackPalace
Taking over the Dragapults after the death of David Nadal is berndawg and Nathan "SwordIsBored", both of their first times managing premier league. They retain Krytocon, who has been doing really well in recent times and was definitely worth the retain. Then.... THEN.... THEY DROPPED HOW MUCH ON DELEMON????? 34000 (thirty four thousand)???????? THIS WAS A MOCK DRAFT!!!
WE ARE LIVING IN NORTH KOREA!!!! Ok like if anyone is worth that price it's delemon but holy shit dude what???? WHO ELSE WAS BIDDING ON THIS???? It does make sense for this manager pair to get her because they needed a superstar but holy shit dude. Anyway, let's see how they built their team around spending 34k on one player.
In SV Bo7 they have the aforementioned 34k delemon, who almost heroically went 9-0 last year but was slain by eblurb in the finals, and is definitely going to have to do some heavy lifting for this team to perform. The other SV slots include bernian sanders, who has done ok in the SV tours he's played, and rumia, who has had a mini resurgence recently with a solid global cup performance. These two get the delemon boost, but will probably still do average. They notably have sufys on the bench who I think is good at the game. In SS Bo7 we have lonzo, who went for pretty cheap tbh and should be able to get 2-3 wins here depending on how much they play. In the Bo5 we have Bomb21XD who is probably gonna farm the Bo5 pool in the 2024th year of our lord. In SM they have their retain Krytocon because it's 2019. In ORAS we have Nathan "got raw 3-0'd by TR Garde G5 in ORAS in OGPL" SwordIsBored, who will probably get bodied in this ORAS pool, especially if they get raw 3-0'd by TR Garde in G5's. However, to those reading this, it's not about how many S tier mons you get 3-0'd by, it's about how many S tier mons you get 3-0'd by and get back up! In BW we have Doug? Doug is my guy and a delemon player, but to me doug is not the type to start week in and week out in pl, so we'll probably see Lialiabeast or Eeveekid in the rotation here. Both of those two should be able to win games off the bench in any tier, so they were good pickups for subs. Idk who ZackPalace is, I think I've seen their name before doing SV stuff though.
Overall what am I supposed to say about this team man. They have a lot of average to below average players on their team, so it's gonna take some overperformances or delemon being like 2018 LeBron to get this team to playoffs.
Hyperspace Horrors
SV Bo7: bo_bobson27
SV: lost heros
SV: happysh
SS Bo7: lolebruh
SS: Liimpy
SM: Felucia
ORAS: seroo
BW: AlyssaVGC
Subs: Lemonlime78, DC
The Horrors franchise gets taken over by lost heros and Felucia, managers of the Gogoats back to manage PL. Known for spamming GOATS in the chat, what will they spam this tour. HORRORS? Not a vibe. We'll see what they come up with. They retained 1v1 swiss winner bo_bobson27 for 24k, which in this economy was probably worth it as an offbrand Jacob. But then... THEY SPENT HOW MUCH ON LOLEBRUH WHAT???? WHERE DID THIS COME FROM???? He's a good player but that price I had no expectation of, especially not from this manager pair. So, with 44k spend on Giboney and lolebruh, how did the rest of their lineup turn out?
In SV Bo7 we have Giboney himself, who I think has gotten a lot better as a player since last pl and should do fine in Bo7. Alongside him in SV is lost heros, who was the opponent of bo in swiss finals. Lost heros does not have a reputation for winning games, but his activity and recent performance in SV should allow him to get some wins this tour. They also picked up happysh, a pretty unsurprising but good pickup for them. They easily have the most active SV core of people with generally interesting ideas, so it'll be interesting to see what they bring. In SS Bo7 we have 20k lolebruh, who ima say does average in this Bo7 pool. In the Bo5 they have Liimpy, who has been one of the best SS Bo5 players in recent tours and looking to put up a big record in the big leagues this time, and he has a good situation to be able to do so. In SM we have Felucia, who has become more active again in 1v1 lately and should enjoy this playing this player pool. She also slayed Close with a galvantula in OGPL, which guarantees her at least a couple wins this tour. In ORAS they picked up seroo, the lolebruh package deal who I don't know but is probably going fast 8th in this ORAS pool. Can probably get 1-2 wins. In BW they have Alyssa who I thought quit but is Back for some Snorlax Thundurus-Incarnate Water action Yahoo! Alyssa's good player should do good. For subs they have LemonLime78 who I don't know but is definitely a room person, and DC, former Sootopolis City Snorlax, who both can probably win off the bench.
Overall, this team has a lot of question marks so it's hard to say how good they will do. I view their SV as their strength, but their Bo5 players are someone who went 0-7 and someone who hasn't played pl before, so /shrug. I think they have some good pieces like Giboney and their SS, and if things go right they can contend for playoffs.
Hellfire Heatrans
SV Bo7: RTM
SV: recti
SV: Indi01
SS Bo7: Nick
SS: stravench
SM: Sanshokuinsumireko
ORAS: Mubs
BW: PA
Subs: Akuu, Exotic64, Frito, Baddy, Portrait or Ruin, Go greeninja
Last years 8th place franchise is taken over by their one shining light in RTM, alongside his friend and two time Barraskewda nLcholas (Class of Pl VI, Pl VII). RTM wants to turn this franchise around after last year and return them to their former glory of winning PL (Heatrans won 1v1PL 3). Will he be successful? Interestingly, this team bought the most players in the auction with 14, and their most expensive buy was Sansho at 11500, so let's see how their lineup turned out.
In SV Bo7 we have RTM aka swag god himself, who has been excellent the past year in 1v1 and is looking to continue that as the star
yapper player of this team. Joining him in SV is recti, who is a major fucking yapper but is doing well in lt I think? God knows how he does here, but I look forward to 100s of messages in 1v1 discord of him talking about his games every week regardless of outcome. Their other SV Bo5 is Indi01, global cup winner and Archaludon enjoyer. I teamed with Indi in the prestigious TTT, and I rate him highly but I think he can be hit or miss because sometimes he just loses to the move earthquake or the pokemon Hoopa-Unbound formation or something. If he develops his fundamentals a bit more he's gonna do really well in this pool though. In SS Bo7 we have Nick, who has historically not done well outside of the barra's system, but if he's motivated to do well here he definitely can. In SS Bo5 we have stravench who went for 6500??? Guys???? A really cheap price to pay for him. He has the potential to underperform of course, but he's at least an excellent teammate and cares, how is he going for 6500????? He probably does average here though, but better than his price tag would suggest. In SM they have Sansho AKA the goat, who ima say destroys the 2019 SM pool. In ORAS we have Mubs, who I was shocked signed up tbh, but he seems to be locked in and ready to put up a good record as he usually does in ORAS. In BW they have PA who is going to do mid to bad because that's what PA does. For subs they have Akuu, former mega ray who shoulda beat delemon 2 (two) times last year but catastrophes happened each time, Exotic64 who won world cup I guess??? and did well in GC, Frito who was a good sub in OGPL, Portrait or Ruin who I do not know, Baddy who I do not know, and Go greeninja who has some results in SV and SS and I think is friends with recti.
When I first saw this draft I thought what the fuck happened here, but when I see the lineup actually put together it's solid. I think this team contends for playoffs, but I think it's lacking in firepower and has a lot of slots that can potentially underperform.
Pools
Just some quick notes about player pools to synthesize some stuff I've talked about in this post.
SV: SV is in a strange place for a current gen. A lot of the players starting in it don't have a lot of results, and the current gen generally has a good amount of variance, so who knows how it's going to go. I suspect SV will develop rather quickly in this tour, and the first teams to figure it out are going to profit and get a lot of free wins. Think of last year when people got farmed by stall zapdos, or diancie, or clear amulet sylv. I suspect the same sorts of things to happen here. There is also the Regidrago angle where we might see drago teams run the tour like Drago/Corv/Volc in world cup.
SS: I'm quite pleased with how the two SS slots worked out. I think both slots have quality player pools, and look forward to how various people interpret the meta.
SM: Rellia, Felucia, Elo Bandit, Jamez, Krytocon, Iron Crusher. It's like a time machine to before even I started heh. Should be fun, but I suspect minimal innovation from this player pool. It will be interesting to see how bea and sansho handle playing the rest.
ORAS: Powerful pool, really the only weak player is seroo, so I expect everyone to beat each other and there to be a lot of 4-3's and 3-4's.
BW: I sleep
I don’t feel like writing more, Megarays, barras, rps make playoffs easily, then heatrans make it in week 7, enjoy the tour
Hellfire Heatrans - marshmelto, vertigo and exotic64
Metro Boomin' Megarays - neomon, palestine and liimpy
Drive-By Dragapults - delemon, enzonana and lialiabeast
Big Baller Barraskewdas - mishlef, ntg cuz idk and frito
Hyperspace Horrors - robyn, iron crusher and glitched
RPS Rhyperiors - roginald, alyssaVGC and rumia
Trigger-Happy Thwackeys - fancy1, blanched and recti
Playful Panchams - lolebruh, xdRudi.exe and despacito87
I think you'd be the perfect pairing next to some real support which I couldn't offer.
