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A Day in the Life of Curtains

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aight I woke up at eight today cuz time is a valuable thing and I dont waste valuable things cuz thats stupid and wasteful. aight i dunno what day it is let me check the bitch. DAT MOLE. ah fuck it's monday-bitch. i hate mondays their gay. theyre weakass pussy shit.

shoulda been friday-bitch. ida settled for wensday bitch.

aight imma hop on smogon. errybody loves me on smogon cept for the haters. they just jealous cuz they know im the best. they talk shit about me an call me retarded cuz they just wish they was me. im the fucking best and I could kick their ass in a fight any day and they know it so they talk smack cuz they dont have to back it up. fucking (BAN ME PLEASE)-ass haters.

im an engineer u know. a dam good one too. im like really close to findin the cure for cancer or some shit like dat

oh hey some of dem is shouting me out in their k threads. I like k threads they show dedication. except for 3k treads they insensitive. i should make a thread about how their bad. that reminds me remember that time on april fools when i said i was leaving and everyone was all sad cuz they thought i was going but then i didn't cuz it was april fools and erryone was like "lol curtains you got us good"? lol that was some good shit. anyway good on dem for finally admittin how awesome i am. i also have a ten inch dong btw

wait what the fuck. ah hell naw. this is bullshit. this is fucking bullshit. they insulting me! who the fuck do they think they are. you want to pick a fight then do it with me with vms dont hide and cry in youre gay threads. fucking pussys. they know I could beat them in a fight or pokemon or whatever but they to scared too call me out face to face. they gang together to make themselvs look tough. i cant be retarded thats just not possible I dont give a fuck if everyone says it its just ridiculus. fucking weakass haters. im just tryin to be a team playa. i know what needs fixin. if theyd just step back and let me sort things out then bam perfect metagame. if theyd stop being retarded and callin me retarded then maybe wed get somewhere

aight enough of smogon. imma smoke some weed. i bet nobody on smogon smokes weed cuz theyre mommas would take away their pokemon and then theyd cry like the little babies they are. go drink some cough syrup you fucking babies.

i can smoke weed all day erryday. they say its not good for you if you do it too much but im like 6'7 so its all good. id smoke all day erryday if i didnt want too set an example for the childrens. i can also drink a horse under the table. u can lead a horse to wisky but you cant make him drink more than me.

aight imma go to work cuz weed dont grow on trees. oh wait yah it does lol. man my boss is a total (BAN ME PLEASE). he don't let me smoke or fuck in the office or nothin. says im disrespectful and incoherent whatever the fuck that means. man fuck him. in fact dats what i told him. fuck him. im fired now but its the principal that counts

time to go clubbin. dis is the time of day when my seven bitches rotate. yeah i like tusday-bitch shes fine as fuck. way better than monday-bitch. anyway its good to have a schedule to stay on top of things

erryone at the clubs loves me. they like "curtains my nigga dj for us" an I do. man im a fucking sick dj. i lay down tracks so hard its illegal. i dont give a fuck though i do what i want. the only reason i could be banned on smogon is cuz im a renegade. and the haters. fucking (BAN ME PLEASE)-ass haters

me and tuseday-bitch get home at midnight and fuck like five times. then i get me some shuteye. I dont need to grow no more but sleeps still important so i get some zs even though i could go like three more times. man i wonder what tomorrow will be like. maybe everyone on smogon will finally see how cool i am.
 
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it was good except you put spaces in between the periods and the next sentence.like this.fucking dumbass (BAN ME PLEASE).
 
weed doesn't grow on trees actually

well at least those cannabis are like really tiny for a tree if they're trees i mean
 
bs thread.this is whats wrong with smogon. bitch ass haters harrassing the straight up beasts just because there jealous.fuckin haters

FREE SMOGON
 
^

lol.this.thread.sux.go.sit.by.your.computer.wishin.u.were.me

excellent work Tobes.
 
But really the bulk of this parody is pretty off since i'm a firm advocate of not worshiping a plant. Nice try though it was a good read.
 
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